同學們面面相覷。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT5uP9zNAaI
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrmf5k8hW0C

「那個……您是不是走錯教室了呢？」身為班長的我起身詢問。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq0u1oBv2fs
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs5YiTOjfxQ

「啊，你們的數學老師請假，所以今天是我代課喔。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM2jSPDc722
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi8D2qdVnq5

「咦咦？沒用的老東西請假？」賴妍驚訝的問。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZyfF8cmK4K
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5dIQkM6Msb

「請不要叫數學老師沒用的老東西。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgL9wkOIHo9
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVm325blTN6

「那改成老不羞好了。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡepkkdyZu4c
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOUIRXCYm33

「更糟糕了啊！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPORBBmXY8q
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2BU7FNI4sZ

「咳，總之，」代課老師乾咳一聲打斷我們的對話，「請各位打開課本第……為什麼桌上有酒瓶？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7QeD2cfDLs
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8pRGj1DCEV

「因為上一節是化學課。」正在製作燃燒瓶的簡澄說。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYJ6LdYbpuX
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOsC5zQjc73

「那你桌上正在燒的酒精燈是怎樣？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9iBD9shwPJ
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtmbohLnJtz

「老師，它正在暖身。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ850t6DoVCU
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEY2orL1Ymd

「它是要暖什麼身啊！給我拿回去實驗室放好！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwG3nF8c2DJ
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7H0aNbvyZ9

「我要去！」賴妍自告奮勇的起身。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjiDj0o0jbC
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5YPltx2X9T

「給我坐下，妳不值得信賴。」我不耐煩的說。「三岐，你去放。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp8vw093Cva
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkPWlFoEyia

「那我改姓三岐。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQmwOJxJOkR
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVQcR2JKw8T

「才不是這個意思！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfjb8OoNyb0
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVTT0CNY3Ve

「而且為什麼是三岐！」剛剛還趴著的三岐抗議。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpVpYY2HACI
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAJRKjM9P5q

「少囉唆！快點給我去放！」我用課本敲三岐的頭，「別跟著搗亂上課秩序好嗎？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf0ZfYhNx9Q
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVawFZEca0h

「汝等下級生物，竟敢命令本元帥，看我痛啊啊啊啊啊啊！」三岐的話還沒說完就被我再次用力敲頭，不過這次用的是不鏽鋼水壺。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV9wog8a2rK
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm0gERdfYkL

「元帥好弱。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbBLlXJdzCQ
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw7aXCDc09T

「你根本是想殺了我吧！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxpZV2N2CTq
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKeKj6HlE6z

「同學們！請安靜！」代課老師看起來有些惱火。「全部給我翻開課本！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTXlvr3vzmd
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb8ktKizkHk

「老師。」賴妍突然嚴肅的開口，「你覺得數學的意義到底是什麼？數學又是為何而存在？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKFg67jeDvX
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYINOqkAy52

「數學是為何而存在…………？」老師陷入沉思。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaRtmv5asrm
  除了賴妍之外的同學們臉色一沉。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmrf1Ek3QZH
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuCzz3E4NS8

「老師！別中計啊！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYTEjsYRffx
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVVqZhiIyvM

「這傢伙的腦子才不會思考這種深奧的東西呢！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ82TM38d196
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuQc7ap4kYF

「她只是單純不想上數學課而已啊！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6sF13NBXYN
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJmXmwpQRZi

    不過老師抬起手制止了那些警告他的同學。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqz6VvFtPEb
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDFTjNpoJsG

「我認為……」在思考片刻之後，老師開口，

「數學是使生活變得更方便的工具。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnNIXgeK7Ot
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNQj2KEynNH

「真的是這樣嗎？」賴妍問。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdfsBuoPivA
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnLSHEr8MU2

「古埃及人與巴比倫人靠著幾何學的幫助，建造出了許多壯觀的建築物！牛頓發明的微積分也間接造福了許多人類！」老師越說越激動，「所以我才會選擇就讀數學系，成為數學老師！數學對我來說就是世界的真理！就是絕對的信仰！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgAcDaUxklM
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJIfciaPuqr

「那……如果我說，」賴妍緩緩開口，「我能反駁你的論點呢？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1R9Og9tfSM
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡproFqCa1QC

「什──」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUTkQWKFc1h
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqyvIaQI9i4

「如果我能證明…………數學並不是世界的真理呢？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA0bAQeg4TZ
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT4xXoPAuub

「臭小鬼！妳明白妳在說什麼嗎！妳說的話是對神的褻瀆！」代課老師憤怒地吼道。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr2tlCM55nx
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdcJ6F9pMYD

「那個，班長，」坐在我後面的男同學輕聲對我說，「這部不是日常番嗎？為什麼會出現戰鬥番的台詞？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5UJwuUilXU
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrTAiwacxi9

「我也很好奇啊！而且現在不是數學課嗎！」

  

  最重要的是，代課老師已經在不知不覺間步入了賴妍「不想上課」的節奏之中，這才是她被稱為瘋狗的最大原因。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqLJlp4qTgz
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjgiaYxzFCc

    真正恐怖的地方還在後頭。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKTieoJkoGl
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiXseEA4xOI

「老師……你知道數學的英文，Math的意義，其實是Mental Abuse To Humans，也就是人類精神虐待的意思喔？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQtZaPH86gr
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6Wm0WgsrtO

「那只是討厭數學的人提出的可悲巧合而已！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ6vvgK5W7N
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7CHek8M1Iy

    賴妍歪頭。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2CHyjguUdw
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxM44PSYfuA

「如果數學是真理，為什麼有人會討厭祂呢？」她問道。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHJhHO0Gmjo
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡudBG8wY7qq

「因為世界上總是有許多自以為是的人！他們只因為生活不如預期，就怪罪到神聖的信仰上面！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHzWIZlrEIK
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFlschWDN0V

「生活不如預期？你是指生活中的事發生無法用真理解釋的情況嗎？還是生活並沒有想像中的便利？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW44DkQ9wl3
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWCTwq1v6Zb

「世上所有的事情一定都有辦法用真理來說明！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSKdAq7lwUT
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeHpRL8HeQv

「真的嗎？」賴妍正色道，「那我舉個簡單的例子吧。您有看過商店中『買二送一』的活動嗎？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw9PGeXwMdO
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ38hSjU8ucR

「當然有。」代課老師不耐煩地回答。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡevI9mIZ62Q
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZCMjJraKch

「那麼一加一等於幾？這只是單純的數學問題，不是腦筋急轉彎喔。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIzIaplptfe
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ69BXthhu6G

「一加一等於二。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwvQ6opjsUZ
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV7sIZaMaYd

「啊咧？奇怪了？」賴妍故意用困惑的語氣說到，「我只付了兩個物品的價錢，為什麼我得到了三倍的利潤？好奇怪吶～」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiuta648fxB
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9n60GEO4Ta

「……咦？」老師愣住了。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNuFDOuZN30
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7MPwmmDeV6

「這樣子算式就變成了『一加一等於三』而不是真理所說的二了呢。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5TrcobUvGc
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzP8ewphFLo

「什…怎麼會……」代課老師開始感到恐慌。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLG44Q48w7w
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRhf5FeyM7C

「老師別中計啊！那只是一種行銷手法而已啊！」我大喊。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡetAco8K63B
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhJPmiAbPpM

「我…但是、但是一加一應該……還是等於二啊…………？」代課老師緩緩抬頭，用困惑而渙散的眼神看著我，就像一位瀕臨崩潰的精神病患者。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBvZgXMfaJd
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgw9kMBMrQp

    完蛋了。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKMzwSstnsz
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCOjGs73RhJ

「我再舉一個例子吧。」賴妍再次開口。「剛剛說了一加一等於三，但是這也不是正確答案。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmfkfavmnNI
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxJiVwjtzx1

「您應該也知道結婚是什麼吧？就是長期的一對一賣春契約。」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNH5oFekMGy
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡccpqx1jLJn

「才不是這樣！」我吐槽。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVjL7AvalXT
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5vVidbo6hz

「好奇怪吶。住在我家隔壁的王叔叔明明結婚了，為什麼最近兩個月，在王阿姨不在的週五晚上，還會出現另外六個女人陪他過夜呢？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzroW0dg3Rb
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA8TdCaXsZy

「這種事情你應該早點去跟王阿姨說才對吧！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN3feEtxRdv
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHIZ0cFdBcm

「咦咦，」賴妍不理我，「一加一不是等於三嗎？為什麼同時又等於八呢？」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1cCnalLtWS
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtjWOshXEEX

「為什麼啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師抱住頭，驚慌失措地尖叫。「為什麼真理要遺棄我啊啊啊啊！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEPrJsWbiZd
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXjThmlZxLS

「沒錯，就是因為人們被你所說的真理拋棄，才會轉而討厭，甚至憎恨數學。對他們來說，數學不只不是世界上的真理，更不是讓生活變得更方便的工具！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf9FO8m9A39
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ6WU9yBPi9

    賴妍深呼吸，補上了最後一擊：「對他們來說，數學只是讓生活更不方便的枷鎖！只是阻礙人類發展的、根本沒有存在必要的、無用垃圾而已啊！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMp5s5sb85E
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvuERmasMOR

「啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊……」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEZuerrHuNP
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVIXVSXSiIH

    老師緩緩蹲下，雙手抱住膝蓋，露出自己長久以來深信的事情在一夕之間被摧毀的表情。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0d9ozGEBcf
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfQWBeV4MuC

  這時，去化學教室放酒精燈的三岐回來了。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB3S6hjXakX

    老師彷彿看見了希望一般，朝著三岐跑過去，抓住了他的肩膀，用力地前後搖動。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPNIXiEkuZ3
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡupSWq98bHF

「同學！一加一等於多少！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3qtTlFFQIf
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Z29aIr3IT

「咦？」在狀況外的三岐很錯愕。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrzGO8WNJV5
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhIgQkXoTnS

    賴妍露出了勝利的微笑，坐回位子上，舒服的翹起二郎腿，抓著桌上的白蘭地仰頭灌了一大口。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKvFazuQwDd
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkUx5EPHAL4

「到底等於多少啊啊啊啊啊！！！」代課老師瘋狂地大喊。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2cE5GthYZf
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡywha8CSIIn

「等、等於五十……」一天到晚吃麥O勞的三岐結結巴巴的回答。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHlRmDyafLH
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYPC0pdPybo

「三等於八、八等於五十……等式應該不成立才…三又等於五十……啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊！」代課老師崩潰了，尖叫著衝出了教室。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ32yepmZHym
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2EJbLCgsMj

    全班盯著三岐。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡifT8C9Ypcn
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7sTSNIluWo

「欸？我做錯什麼了嗎？」三岐很錯愕。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ3UACKEoL6
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgYrMjRsXaq

    賴妍抬頭看了一眼教室牆上的時鐘。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJWSwEchae4
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3dQiTutOJQ

「呦喜！多賺到了半小時下課時間。」她握拳。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJEZNYt8DMY
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlFksa4Xix0

「呦喜妳個大頭！他被你弄壞了啦！」我慌張地大喊，「全班快點出去幫忙找代課老師啊！」216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ725OAGTq6J
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrRjWlFeXhP
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRItHMaTIAM

當日結果：216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4fnEzJ4lN
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZdQidPtunm

    在數學科辦公室全體數學老師的幫忙下，於放學前在校舍頂樓的花圃角落發現了喃喃自語著「三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十我被神拋棄了嗚嗚嗚我要成為一棵用費波納契數列整齊排列的植物三等於八等於五十三等於八等於五十…」的代課老師，並送到附近醫院的精神科治療。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwvXC5c2yBL
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbHvUqaUjsF

    賴妍被記了一支大過（目前總共七支）。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ69wHcfgLHf
216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDXhMsaf1Ru

    柳困依然單身。216Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2izLrmEk3o