A/N: Trigger Warning--sexual harassment and sexual violation
Chapter 8~ Stormy Weather
The days strung together like pearls on a necklace, each one tacking onto the next until the time that had passed seemed undecipherable. I couldn’t say the future was looking any brighter but I received fewer and fewer visits from Tew; I was treated a bit more…humane. All the while, I got more and more visits from Edmund. He’d feed me and tell me everything he’d seen that day—from the color of the sky and the blazing sunlight to each inhabitable island they’d passed. He’d even sing me some of the shanties he’d written for the crew. I would smile and laugh at Edmund’s horrendous singing voice but always ask him to teach me the songs. I suppose it gave me something to keep my mind on. Until then, I’d never treasured how incredible it felt having something to look forward to each day, something to give you hope.
One night, before Edmund left, I stopped him quick.
“Bring a deck of cards next time,” I insisted. He gave me an unsure look and shrugged.
“I’m not sure that’d be a good idea—me stealin' a deck from the crew. They’d notice.”446Please respect copyright.PENANAlvsrSqzmSV
“Oh, please, Edmund. I’m so bored I’ve begun counting the nails in the floorboards. Just one night. That’s all I ask.” 446Please respect copyright.PENANAx19twDNnyR
Edmund saw my almost desperate desire and repressed his constraints on the matter. “Just one night,” he grinned as he disappeared into the outside world. It was the kind of smile that imprinted in the back of your eyes and visited every time you shut them. And I hadn’t seen anything more comforting in so long.
The next few nights wrought storms as hellish as the devil himself. The ship bounced and rocked so madly that I’d roll along the floor; sleep was impossible and my ears were filled with a constant crashing of the ungodly waves. There were many nights I was convinced I was in a nightmare and that I may wake to find myself back home with my wretched godmother.
And Edmund stopped coming every night. That was certainly worrying. I stopped getting fed--as if Tew decided it’d be easier to just let me starve. I wouldn’t have been surprised.
Eventually, there were days where I would see no one at all. And out of everything that had ever happened to me aboard that nightmarish ship, loneliness was the scariest.
One particularly quiet evening, the door opened slowly. The sound was a blessing to my ears. I didn’t even care who was coming. It was a living person, after all.
“Constantine?”
“Edmund, what the hell has happened? Where were you?” Silently, he shut the door behind him and stuffed the key in his raggedy brown coat. He took two things out of his other pocket and stuffed them in my hands—a carrot and a chunk of stale bread.
“Bless you,” I nearly cried, devouring the food in seconds. Part of me was scared the next time I would see Edmund was either overboard or beaten like raw meat. But, he was untouched; all the bruises and cuts from his fray with the Captain had all healed kindly. His hair was wet with seawater and fell into his eyes. It gave him a menacing look that I’d never seen before.
“What’s happened? Tell me, Edmund.”
“We’ve reached Luanda.”
“Luanda?”
“A port in West Africa. Tew is sailin’ us all the way ‘cross. I suspect he’s leadin’ us to India. But we’re being followed."446Please respect copyright.PENANAb9V9tscuDX
A spark of hope that hadn’t seen the light of day in what felt like years shocked my insides. My father…
“Do you think it’s-” I began.
“I don’t think so. Tew wants your father’s head so badly. I’m sure he’d wage war at any sight of him. But it’s been several days of the stalkin’.”
“Who is it then?”
“No one knows. An Indian brig, no less. Tew seems to be considerin’ fightin'.”
“What’s holding him back?” I asked. He raised his eyebrows as if it was already obvious.
“You. If he’s forced to battle on the sea, he’d be riskin’ the life of his hostage. And he needs you alive.”
It was truly sickening. I sighed restlessly but Edmund looked like there was more he wasn’t telling. He shifted, trying to change the subject. “How are your ribs?”
“What else, Edmund?”
“Nothing else. Everyone is just on edge. We haven’t had to battle in a few months. It’s not exactly everyone’s favorite activity.” 446Please respect copyright.PENANA8USzi1BGBv
I tried to laugh. He smiled too. I missed his visits almost as much as I missed my father—my precious, wretched father. I couldn’t see Edmund very well in the black nothingness. But I could somehow feel his every movement. I was scared to ask it. Like it was something that must have remained unspoken of.
Nevertheless, I whispered, “Where did you go? I thought something horrible had happened.” 446Please respect copyright.PENANAQwebMjdasN
He smirked confidently and the glow of pride just radiated off him. “Worried about me, were you? I had no idea I had such an effect.” 446Please respect copyright.PENANAQRCyDZJQ0Q
I rolled my eyes and folded my arms.
“You’re my only friend on this ship. And the only person I can talk to. Don’t take it too personally,” I retorted jokingly.
“Oh, but I do, Constantine.”
A little redness spread over my cheeks, one that not even the darkness could hide completely. Edmund was very pleased with himself. He continued, “You needn’t worry about all that. I’m here now, aren’t I? Anyway, I have somethin' else for you.” Out of his pocket, Edmund retrieved a small stack of playing cards secured with a string.
“You brought it!” I exclaimed. He nodded but put them back away.
“But we can’t play tonight. I can barely see your face in this darkness. And I'll need to be able to call your god-awful bluffs. I’ll be back tomorrow.” The Cabin Boy pulled away to leave but, before I could understand what I was doing, I reached an arm back out as if to make him stay. Curiously he watched me, and I quickly wanted to be hidden away. 446Please respect copyright.PENANAOfhKpdQe3C
I heard a few words pass my lips, ones I’d forgotten the meaning of: “Don’t go.”
I wished I could’ve seen some sort of expression on his face. Instead, I felt a hand take mine.
My stomach jumped, and I was suddenly afraid. Only in a way that I sort of liked. Edmund’s hand was strong. It was warm and hid my cold one away. His calloused thumb brushed over my skin, gently and tenderly. I tried to search his face for anything. His gaze was constant and spoke a language to me that I couldn’t understand. Edmund’s other hand, from out of nowhere, touched my cheek. And he whispered, almost inaudibly, “Do you want me to stay?” The space between us was disappearing and the fear was growing like a virus in my system.
Soon, I felt his breath inches from my lips, and he wasn’t stopping. Edmund’s hand wrapped around mine became tight and trap-like.
“Stop.”
Like someone had frozen time, everything halted and there was only Edmund, centimeters from my face. I could tell he was just as equally confused as me. Before anything became more awkward, I pulled my hand out from under his and slid his other hand off my face.
“I can’t do this.” The confusion had now been replaced with a sense of despair that made my insides want to die.
He stood back up again, scooping up any pride left, and only said, “Sorry. I-I…don’t know what came over me…Uh…Good night then.” He was gone. And then I really started to cry.
“Get up!” A jolt from an angry crewman woke me. My eyelids were crusty from dried tears and my body was limp from the restless night. But that didn’t stop him. The door was being propped open by another crewmate. Suddenly, I was being hauled outside into midnight air.
“Let me go, you bastards! Not today! Please!” The ship was empty and there were only stars twinkling back at me like millions of eyes staring down at me—pitying me. The foul pirate dragged me across the deck into the crew’s quarters below the ship. Tew was nowhere to be seen. All too quickly, I started to understand what was about to happen. “Help!!”
My body tumbled down a small staircase into the main quarters where there waited the entire crew. My chest burned like fire again as old injuries flared up. The bruises would prove memories in the morning. A candle lightened up the room to reveal drunk men dancing and hollering song lyrics from hazy memory. And it smelled like pig shit.
Edmund was gone—my only protection, although I doubted I would ever know his kindness again after what happened earlier that night. I would meet the same fate as Edmund’s dead mother tonight. A fat, bearded black man approached, reeking of rum and sweat. He grinned down into my teary eyes.
“Well, what’ve we got here, lads?”
“Let me go!!”
“Oh, I can already tell you’re going to be a mouthful tonight. I should fill that pretty mouth with something we’ll both enjoy, yeah? Tie her up. Gag her.”
“No!! Please!”
The crew jumped on me. Some tied up my arms and feet. Others tied a gag around my mouth, and one ripped open my white blouse and began molesting my breasts. The tears burned down my cheeks and stung. Before me, the fat black man unbuckled his trousers and stuck a huge hand down to his genitals. With a roar of laughter, he yelled, “Spin the bitch around and LET’S HAVE SOME FUN, MEN!!” I screamed into my gag as they began to grab me everywhere.
Suddenly, the ringing from a gunshot filled my ears and the men turned to see who fired the thing.
Edmund stood in the corner of the main quarters, pistol pointed out into an open gunport. I could barely get a glimpse of his face beneath the burly male mass. But he looked venomous, with the most hatred I’d ever seen in a person.
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing, lad?” spat the fat pirate. Edmund slipped the pistol in the waist of his trousers and smirked darkly.
“C’mon, Rathbone, you know the Captain would be cross with you if you took his hostage without his knowin'. You don’t want to have to deal with a pregnancy, now would you? That’s just a mess in a place like this.”
The man named Rathbone looked back at me with a now disgusted look. The rest of the crew soon followed suit.
“Now, just let her go to me and the Captain will never have to know about this. Next port we stop at, I promise you can have your fill of lassies at the whore house.” Rathbone grunted reluctantly but picked me up by my bruised arm, causing me to yelp, and threw me Edmund’s way. I fell to my knees and clung to him, shaking and weak. He carefully lifted me to my feet, and we began our ascent back up to the main deck. My tears wet the shoulder of his shirt as I cried on him, not even thinking of what had occurred only hours ago.
“Don’t cry now. You gotta stand, lass.” I walked, as he asked until we made it back into my room. My hands were constantly pulling at the remains of my blouse, trying to cover my indecency. Edmund helped me to the far side of the room and laid me down. Then, just as I caught my breath again, he was undressing his chest.
“What are you doing?”
He had laid down his jacket and was pulling his long white blouse, similar to my old one, over his head. Underneath, though I tried not looking, was a golden, fairly muscular chest with faint, silvery scars that caught my eye in the moonlight. Edmund then put the blouse in my arms and turned around so I could have privacy. But I could hardly move.
“You…What about you?” I choked, still shaken from the incident. He glanced back around for a second and put on the bravest look I’d ever seen on a man.
“I’ll be fine. I can get more.”
Cautiously, my hands fiddled with the loose material and removed my tattered blouse remains to replace it with the new linen one. And I was, in an instant, engulfed in his scent.
All of these things only built up the pain so much that I had unnoticeably begun crying again. Edmund hushed me and held me to him, rocking me back and forth with the sway of the ship.
“I’m going to die on here, Edmund…”
“No,” Edmund whispered, “I swear to you that you will not die on this ship, Constantine. You won’t die anywhere near it.” There was something in his voice I hadn’t heard before. Something I wanted to ask about but I could already feel the mercy of the night sweeping me away into a blessed slumber. But I was still in those arms and remained conscious until I could no longer distinguish his rocking from that of the Amity.
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