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Chapter 15~ Everything Changed
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2 days left…
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It had been nearly a week since we all formed into one power. The end was imminent—we could all feel it. How the air had suddenly shifted. We would arrive in Madagascar any day now. Now, it was just a matter of waiting for the moment to strike, for the steel forces of Kidd to soften just enough. I couldn’t help but notice the metamorphosis of my life during those last few days. Everything had changed so drastically. Constantine was here and with child—my child! We were on our way to freedom at last, and I was growing ever closer to finding Gretchen.
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“Hurry up now!” her voice cried as she slipped further down the trail of cobblestone and warm bodies. I pushed through the crowds, quite confused and just a bit frustrated.
“Slow down, Gretchen, slow down!”
But, she barely heard me. This was so unlike her! To pull me from my fishing pole just for a trip to the ship ports? She must have gone mad. All I could make out of Gretchen’s figure was her shoulder-length bronzy hair, identical to mine. We looked quite similar as siblings go. I reached out for her every time I was about to lose her again. But, she always slowed her pace just a bit as if she knew exactly where I was behind her. We’d broken away from the marketplace finally and the crowds dissolved from our path. I was so fascinated by her speed. I wasn’t sure I’d ever seen her run!
“We’ll miss it, Edmund. Hurry!”
I grew increasingly weary and felt the aching in my knees. We neared the working ports of England. Tall, mountain-like ships occupied the bank. Gretchen finally stopped and watched. All around us, men loaded ships and made repairs to riggings. Two men were rolling on large, grey barrel-like machines that I’d never seen before.
“Cannons…” she said to herself. She watched further as I dealt with the heavy panting in my chest. Then, she pointed to another ship about half a mile away. Without a word, she took off closer to its bank. I called after her and followed,growing quite tired and irritable. This ship was just a bit different than the others. It was broader, more colorful and menacing. With a loud crack of the wind, the sails unfurled and the ship began moving with the assistance of several men pushing the rear. It was a military brigade. It had to be! I looked up at Gretchen. She was smiling and gazing out with a deeply-rooted appreciation.
“This was what I wanted you to see. Isn’t it just wonderful? How they just fly away into the world like that…like nothin’ holds them back. They could go anywhere they want for however long they wish.” She walked closer to the bank until she reached the dock. The water lapped at the wooden posts below. I remember the bright, blue sky without a cloud to be seen. The horizon was vast, empty. Limitless. At the time, I could not see it all as clearly as my sister. I tugged at her arm, not wishing to remain in the filthy docks any longer. She saw my face and turned back to the town. I waited for the same hopeful glow to find her face again, but she just peered across the city of stone and steel, empty faced. I tugged again and we walked back to the town—my home. Just not her’s.
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We ran into more problems as the days leading up approached. For the most part, we were all weaponless. Some of the more daring men planned to sneak into the crew’s cabin late at night and steal a few daggers or pistols. I never learned if their plan actually worked. Even so, I had the job of watching over Constantine and figuring out how to protect her from the disaster that was sure to strike. Kidd and his men would not be turning over authority without a bloody fight. They’d take as many of us down as possible. There was also the matter of the other two ships of Kidd’s trailing behind us. But, Reyes comforted me in the fact that he had a plan with Samvel. It seemed I was only to worry about keeping as many alive as I could.
The hours were drawn out horribly. I barely saw Kidd and I refused to join him in his quarters. It would be simple to say he had not an inkling of the atmosphere of the ship, but Kidd had known the crew long enough to tell the difference. Maybe he did really know what was coming and had a militia of his own to defend his throne. Or maybe he was just too tired to bother.
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As the long day drew to an end, I tried to focus my thoughts on what was ahead—not just the fight but what came after. I touched my hand to my chest and felt the compass I’d long carried on my person. The one from my Gretchen. I thought a lot of her lately. She found her way in my dreams and my nightmares like sunlight slipping into the little cracks of a cage. Sometimes, she felt real, like she was right there at the corners of my mind. I wanted to reach out to her, but what would I even say? Even now, I couldn’t understand her mind or the decisions she made. What could I say to make it right? Could I even do it after all this time?
“Edmund,” a voice pulled my attention to the other side of the ship’s railing. It was her. She was just as she’d looked years and years ago. Thick bronze hair flying about the wind, eyes watching me with a calm presence. She was fair, soft, and dream-like. But, she was real. I reached for her small hand.
“Gretchen.”
She smiled. Her hands were delicate, kind. I squeezed and knew I wasn’t wrong. She was here with me.
“Edmund.”
In an instant, she was gone.
The hands were not hers but Constantine’s. I looked into her face and curious blue eyes. The smiling face of my sister had disappeared. One of concern replaced it instead. Constantine held tight onto my hands and watched me intently.
“Edmund, what’s wrong?”
I blinked a few times. The world around her came back into focus. I drew a hand away and held onto the railing.
“Nothin',” I replied, “I’m just a bit unbalanced is all. How are you feelin', love?”
She pressed a hand to her belly and admired it.
“We’re feeling just pleasant today.”
I chuckled. “That must be the first time in a long while.”
She laughed with me and looked out on the horizon. Were we watching the same sky?
The wind pushed against the sails behind us. I drew in a long breath.
“Do you feel ready?” she asked, but she knew the answer.
“People will die. Good men, perhaps Reyes.” I hesitated and took her hand, “Perhaps even me.”
“Don’t say such a thing.”
“It’s true, Constantine. We were lucky to come out with our bloody lives when Tew’s ship got overthrown. Even then, many losses were taken.”
Constantine drew a stiff breath. The cannons pounded the back of my skull.
“I hope for the best,” I continued, “But, I will fight until my last dyin’ breath, because if this plan fails, all hope is lost.”
She squeezed my hand tight. The wind died down to a silent stirring. Constantine held her head down, and a thought crossed my mind.
“But, perhaps not for you.”
I felt her watching me, but I just couldn’t reach her eyes.
“What—”
“If somethin’ happens to me, you have to keep goin'. I know you’ll know what to do. Just find land as quickly as possible and—”
“Edmund, stop it.”
“Listen to me now. Just take your gun and kill whoever steps in your way. Find steady ground and reach the nearest village.”
I took hold of the broken compass around my neck and turned it over to its stained brass backing. With a sharp twist of the wrist, the backing fell off and revealed two golden coins. They were aged but still glimmered in the eyes. The emblem of some long-dead royal family was emblazoned on the surfaces. I pressed the two coins into her palms. She looked down at them in disgust.
“They date back three-hundred years. They’ll be enough to take you home to England and enough for a room. And you can find another bloke to stay with you. But, you can stay safe—both of you can.”
She tried shoving the coins back to me. “I’m not doing any of that. I don’t want to go anywhere without you.”
I grasped her shoulder and pressed my face closer to hers.
“Me neither, love. But, you’re not just makin’ decisions for yourself anymore.”
I held a hand to her stomach and felt the choking stiffness rise in my throat. A tear ran down Constantine’s cheek then another and another.
“Hey,” I gently hummed, “Don’t cry now. It’ll be alright, love. I promise.”
She shook her head vigorously and wrapped her arms tight around me.
“No, it won’t.”
I didn’t say anything else. I held her close to me as the wind threatened to topple us over. The cool breeze of the night was coming in and banishing the sun. But, I didn’t want this moment to end. I was more scared than I’d ever been in my life. And I couldn’t wish it away. I couldn’t blame any of it on grim fortune. I caused this, and it was time for me to pay with my life. I was terrified, but most of all, I was sorry. I was so sorry for leaving Bombay, for striking a deal with Kidd and letting him dig under my skin, and for letting my dreams run away from me, from Constantine—from home.
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That night, as I lay in my hammock, I stared up at the ceiling and tried to see the stars. But the candlelight blotted out any bit of sky to be seen through the cracks of the ship. I couldn’t sleep. I could hardly shut my eyes. There was too much to worry over and too much to fear. Sleeping would be of no use anyways. I’d just wake from nightmares.
I sat up and stretched my arms. Everyone else had been asleep for hours. I reached for my sack hanging from the hammock. It contained the only memories of the Quedagh Merchant I had left. I felt the mass of coins I’d earned sitting at the bottom. There on top was Constantine’s lacy scrap of fabric followed by the letter I’d never sent to her. I retrieved it and unfolded the delicate edges of parchment.
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Constantine,
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I don’t know if this letter will reach you or not, but I thought I ought to at least try. The last few months have been more difficult than any spent on the Amity. Or any in my life, in fact. We’re porting next in Cochin. We’re returning home, love. And I can promise that at home is where I will stay from now on.
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When I was younger, I never thought I’d amount to anything. I was a pirate—nothing more, nothing less. I thought I was bound to spend the rest of my life alone and voiceless. She came and proved me wrong. Ever since, I felt myself slipping. We didn’t feel we deserved each other. Maybe that would be permanent damage. And that was okay. No man goes through an adventure without a few battle scars. But, now, we had a chance to make things a little more right. I couldn’t tell if we’d ever get the happy ending Constantine was hunting for through her father or the one I thought would never come. But, something was coming. The world was changing, opening its eyes. The reign of pirates wouldn’t last forever. We all knew it to be true. I just prayed to God that when the power shifted, it would be put into the hands of good men and women. There would be no more slaughter and cheating, no more fear and madness. Perhaps what we would do in the next few days wouldn’t matter and no one would remember it or tell the story to their grandchildren. Or maybe it would be the spark that unleashed the restlessness of the world. The world was changing. And, it was coming on quick.
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