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It was a classical day in my prison. I got up from my pallet which I was sleeping on and did my prisoner morning routine. As I always like to say, morning routine is cornerstone of becoming a succesful prisoner. As soon as I wake up, I stretch my body, especially my big fat juicy ......... belly. After a little stretching I drink about 5 litres of water (I was inspired to drink this amount by Shrek). When I hear the water flowing in my body I brush my teeth with pieces of rock, which fall off the wall of my cell. And now voilà, my teeth are broken and am ready for this day.
I was just educating myself, by reading The Art of War, when I realised that someone is watching me. I stopped reading and looked for the source of my suspicion. My sixth sense was right, there was an eagle sitting on ledge of my window and he was holding ... CHOCOLATE BAR. I immediately realised, that this is the moment I was waiting for, this is my ticket to freedom. I reached for my toothbrush (piece of stone) and I picked it up from ground. I was moving very slowly in order to not startle the bird. I concentrated on my target, I knew that if I miss the eagle would fly away and with him my only chance of escaping. I threw the rock and it git the eagle just as I calculated. He dropped the chocolate and flew out of my cell.
I happily sprinted to the chocolate. When I hugged her I farted with relief. I swallowed whole chocolate bar without chewing. Right after that I have felt like never before, this was my first chocolate after about 2 years of rotting in this prison. I have felt aura of pure power around me.632Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmUWIpzp69B
I felt unstoppable. I tore the vibranium chains, like they were made from paper. In one powerful leap I broke through the armored door, which were holding me in my cell. Apparently no guard was expecting my arrival, because they were playing cards. One of them experienced my dirty, two years not washed, leg. I blew another away by my Winterfresh breath. I took the last one by little finger and threw him 10 kilometers away. Now my time has came and I am finally free. I jumped on roof of my tower, and as I was enyojing the view, I screamed at top of my lungs: "Obama Parents, I am coming for you." I have screamed with such a force, that my paunch undulated like a tsunami of lard.632Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ34zjB3VENy
