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天亮，上班。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd9ZsE8WyAl
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmzKbFccPz0
擠進人山人海的車廂，心竟是難得的平靜。看著人們專注把玩手中的電子玩物，我心中更覺異常的安全。畢竟，好不容易才能擺脫熟人的注意。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWiRQR4eQZq
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkW6m21WYP5
車廂一如往常，平穩中帶輕微搖晃，教本已帶睡意的乘客更為昏昏欲睡。有些嘴饞的人不理會廣播的呼籲，繼續進食，令人側目。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeM0JX8JrTq
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7TLt9SFhId
食物的細碎，像沙子一樣，在人們毫不注意的情況下，悄然掉在地上，再被無意地踏個粉碎。在接著的數個車站，人們再肆意加以踐踏，令碎粉再度粉碎。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6oSi1W0Kqn
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNVxwJjRoYG
到站了，我有意無意地繞過人羣，「不經意」踏中那些有數隻小蟻的食物碎粉，心中是一陣少有的快意。幕門關上，我回頭望進車廂，想要看看被我蹂躪過的碎粉，但列車經已開駛。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH8riqGd4CT
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEys6eCV6Ss
看不見，罷。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCEN2l6cSyK
天黑，下班。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTjZ2jrIdSh
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7n414aRBgI
身心俱疲。好不容易才與同路的男同事擠進車廂，繼續講上司的壞話。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6rIb7vvDOI
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBdAHHaPzd4
「有蟻。」男同事突然指著快由我鞋面爬到小腿的一隻小螞蟻。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYiaQzBhGLa
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfwtYDcgiKf
我呆了。腦海中一片空白。不！有一個很遙遠的身影。那是誰？我看不見……我不想看見……171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8geDCpteYy
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6etbfNccVQ
「啪」的一聲，男同事一手拍在我的小腿上，那隻螞蟻——扁了。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn3ybE8uzVH
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPMpolhdnBD
「沒事了！」他笑了笑，問我：「你很怕小昆蟲？」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDIPtKvqfuR
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSrEdkGV5oz
「不，只是怕蟻。」我感覺到，我的唇還在顫抖，但卻仍勉力一笑。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEIKtFzStM4
公司，午飯時間。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJopOYi4Nid
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJOOTf95F5n
甲小姐正在上網看劇；乙先生在打盹；丙小姐外出吃飯去；丁先生仍在享用他那巨型飯盒；戊小姐……171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi1VnaQK8Ue
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKWtBZLFZgj
看著同事們的百態，我突然覺得自己和他們一樣，都是很渺小的生命體，小得……有點兒……像……螞蟻。這是我最不想要看到的事，尤其是發生在我自己身上。大家營役勞碌，不也是只為求兩餐溫飽嗎？那與盲目求存的螞蟻有何分別？171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd7iHwDw8R5
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPit74GSltg
驀地，我看見一隻螞蟻在我手背上路過，卻沒意識去按扁它。我把手輕輕放在枱面上，讓它自然而然的爬走。看著它在牆角消失，我感到自己也消失了似的。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG1qWA7xMSf
其實，真正的我只是一隻螞蟻，不過會偶爾做白日夢，幻想自己變成人類，過著那荒唐無稽的生活。那種生活，是有目的的付出，有希望的付出。每天朝著那所謂的「希望」跑，多奢侈！無他，這就是意義。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ6aBTD49Fq
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡESPosH253M
還是……171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB8KSSEIMCS
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgxoM6Ju52n
其實，真正的我只是一個渺小的人類。不過會偶爾做白日夢，幻想自己是一隻蟻，過著那種沒頭沒腦的生活。那種生活很乏味，只懂一味尋找食物。無他，這就是生存！171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX6LOoMzv3s
公司，工作。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9VUjvAOjCc
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNVmQm8fIeI
被上司罵個狗血淋頭。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG0H1NT3Kie
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbxzn94vdoK
大家心知犯錯的不是我，奈何人是怕事的，只好把我推上斷頭台。事後，一句道歉或安慰也欠奉。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRt3Lc7Lt4p
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNk13mKDOoy
很難過。我只好躲進廁格稍作自我冷靜。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡduDIgtYbe7
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMGuwswEcQr
剛巧，一隻螞蟻經過廁格。我毫不猶豫一腳踏扁它。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhPNbtQwbgB
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUlEVDsARjp
快意，笑了。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqBCQw8kFzU
酒吧，喝酒。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFGZvEwTzBS
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡix1ZDnox9W
「你不是只怕螞蟻而已嗎？為何現在也怕酒起來？」男同事笑問。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRWvRsJFm51
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfFOeoQaH37
「其實，我不大好喝酒。」我怯怯的道。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrq9QyUtAfj
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAfncZe6FfF
「還是……你根本不會喝酒？」他哈哈大笑。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0TN6p20Tdq
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKHrM0OAQI3
聽著他那豁然開朗開朗的笑聲，我突然變得不大抗拒，乾脆把小杯裡的酒一飲而盡。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbEHaHxD7IF
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm90C14HM1E
醉倒。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxMpa2UC8nB
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTpLIqTCr8m
迷糊間，我看見男同事以螞蟻姿態爬上我的身體，不停遊走於每吋肌膚。他似乎沒停下來的意欲，想要到它的洞穴去……171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBgE1HWM8e9
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgWZwS75B4U
「上天取走你的一扇門，定會留給你一扇窗。」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡajdiwalPlt
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiosApzyM3d
今趟，上天留給我一隻螞蟻。我給其取名為「男朋友」。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMJEcuzztoz
假期，醫院。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNT0UreJ02N
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNjiOr07qDx
媽就在這間醫院裡。她患了甚麼病，還未明確，因為報告要待下星期才會完成。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8rohdKO6ZW
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdO33w9dYmK
看見媽的時候，家中各人都是淚眼漣漣，很憂心。這種氣氛令健壯的人也難免感到窒息。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxjLL5toyT6
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEgtessolUA
「我覺得……」近幾天，媽的話都變得斷斷續續：「自己……」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxt1VWhivcm
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4qRZ6Gy6jy
大家都屏息靜氣，深怕這是她的最後一句話。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSJs144Meho
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRqWYRtfRXy
「自己是……一隻螞蟻……」她的聲音，輕如柔絲，但我知道大家都聽得很清楚。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7lK5fV6JeX
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdMF7gpLsxB
死寂。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEElfGrhU3j
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmK3QIg34Ak
出乎我意料，這竟是她講得最清楚的一句話，不論是肉體還是心靈上。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQaDYIBGFU0
回家，晚飯。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqeHoheC882
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1SYrfEgxLH
一枱六椅，異常的沉默。電視的聲浪，掩不住大家的咀嚼聲——大家口中的食物似乎比鋼鐵更硬。我裝作不以為意，繼續吃。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq4betlmn8F
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNK6GQYPRll
「很難吃。」爸突然放下筷子：「不如外出吃飯。」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡirT88ehqne
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmon3sHRKaP
妹放下筷子衝進房內，甩門；姨低下頭來，但她盯著枱上菜餚的怒目卻仍清晰可見；婆呆了，眼眶紅潤；我默默望著對面牆身上一隻偶然經過的螞蟻。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡynCaN9WMrx
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa82vL8SOPJ
我心想：世界末日來臨後，地球會否只剩下這隻螞蟻？171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZ1y8idok2
每次望著媽，心中都生起莫名的感覺。我的腦海裡浮現出一隻螞蟻的模樣，彷彿她根本就是一隻螞蟻。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0JWFg2hVcF
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMQbipRoA69
一隻螞蟻在做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……多可笑！就是因為她是一隻螞蟻，所以我從沒有幫忙做家務的念頭，去減輕她的負擔。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ95MI03dUja
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJggmPhrpHq
久而久之，我每次一見到她，便會掉頭走。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRVEc7Q58Bd
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnbj4KcCxEn
但我知道，我永沒能走遠。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhLewfPeKbs
男友家，床上。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVwocflcaTL
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDwpGKEbHqe
前奏後，男友進入極度興奮狀態，沒注意到我正在放空自己。在他還在我身上冒汗之時，我的思緒又飛往遙遠的他方去了——産房。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAWYJL3oMZA
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGUhP6m3HnN
産房內有一張床，床上有一隻非常細小的蟻后。她痛得不得了，是産婦們口中的十級痛楚。那表示，她要生産了。不消一會，整張床上都是幼蟻，恐怖非常。但她的身體卻沒停止的意識。現在幼蟻已攻陷整個産房、整間醫院、整個世界。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZzOygg8NtQ
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnMfetvIlhe
我驚恐萬分之際，耳邊傳來蟻后的淒怨聲音：「他朝君體也相同！」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeRnp3gPvhc
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYAhq6ittbV
床上的我驚叫。男友以為我也感到興奮，於是更用力……171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1kLBt9xrM8
舊生聚會，內地某酒家。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtfZum49D47
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW6JIYCZvB3
說也奇怪，舊生聚會竟會選擇在內地舉行。聽聞是聚會發起人的主意，說會給我們驚喜。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEQ3FmYMlxc
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMu8cLpkuAp
「蟻宴？」我呆了，但逃不了。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVASjn8LNZm
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbZTTQi6aGe
「你有收看《天與地》嗎？」舊生甲吃一口紅蟻炒蛋。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkwPX8u3lKp
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbp0NdmQrkN
「有。人吃人那幕很震撼！」乙滿口黑蟻殘肢。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdKXWWubGZE
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq2SKcfsnFV
「結局何如？」丙一口氣喝下半碗白蟻湯。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ07gPQeXtbc
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4T4gF2108U
「沒好下場！」丁邊說邊給我一碗黃蟻糖水。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCAyfh3SKDY
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtPvw6O3Vzd
「對！沒好下場！」我在心裡重覆著，衝到洗手間嘔吐大作。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLqgKt1fmZX
男友有很多恐怖的寵物：蛇、蜥蝪、蜘蛛……每次做愛時，他都會放一些寵物在床邊，以增加他的性趣。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6apZwy0zzP
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAwGquZjChM
今趟，床邊竟無任何寵物的蹤影。我暗喜。完事後，我不經意的問道：「你的寵物呢？」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi0L0dFfLAG
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxHyFcfTPnm
「在你體內。」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwSyzzTGM3N
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLf8BkVVFst
「甚麼？」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBOiLno3OjO
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAtzQb2vlnS
「蟻。」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjfBsC5sGtC
有一隻螞蟻住在我心內。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAos9KnORZZ
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNCp6H0KC4j
它平常會做甚麼？做菜煮飯、洗衣拖地、燙衫抹窗……嗯，它會做的事真的很多，但從沒理會過我的感受。它憑甚麼闖進我的心、我的生活！它最好立刻消失！171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYlTivOATGb
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡewZpjtVSn0
結果，我生命中其中一隻螞蟻真的消失了。我依稀記得它的名字是「媽」。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCLWBgSPF5g
靈堂上，我一再向來賓欠身鞠躬。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrty7WkgXcc
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4ssH0a53O2
「她真的死了嗎？」某君的聲音傳到我耳邊，但我心知那不是靈堂裡的人。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXu9KBUhylI
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ39CIEvFYJt
「誰？」另一聲音反問。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO03n4uMoUH
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuiuNP3hHjL
「二九三號表妹。」某君不耐煩的道：「她……」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZLcDHGbdCv
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNJe8k2dShX
靜。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEXL31plBeG
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMuCtq7GRRx
我回過神來，低頭一看——我剛不經意踏扁兩隻小蟻。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNormOxVGYu
我：「我的耳朵有毛病嗎？為何會聽到螞蟻講話？」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQyuHDlpa8o
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW1eevzjK0B
醫：「不。是你的壓力過大，導致有幻聽。」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiQbwoITRL1
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDzh1l0c8OP
我：「我有精神病？」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAWAw38BprC
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqq33hbBp9L
醫：「是情緒病。」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3CMVmfa6Vj
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZDaro7duJD
我：「怎麼辦？」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3LPyvHuSo1
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuUWMEjr1MR
醫：「我會處方一些藥物，你要按時服用；另外，你也要多休息……」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Qh8Ja7phg
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkFGCX2j9fJ
我：「謝謝醫生。」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNnK2Vachf7
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyVyyfzrFcy
醫：「不用謝。」171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmDCqfTuoev
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5CnXp6i4ab
離開診所時，我回頭望一望地上的廣告牌——「馬義專科」。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOpF8TBTXJW
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡulsHEoAHS6
不，我走近細看，是「虫馬虫義」專科。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeZktKXt52t
總覺得體內有東西在蠶食著我。是蟻？171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI9eGIsHHFI
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6dLxqnf25n
醫生替我作身體檢查，一切正常；171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7N7sL4ExOo
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeLwPPoqlOd
男友向我解釋，螞蟻之說，純粹幽默；171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbfmVi4X6tr
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNd4r2NwXwj
同事都勸我休息，減少工作量；171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAOigapLm2g
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpObmjXAbrP
……171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfi4WBSDaGf
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF7dmWOSZHk
「真的有蟻在我體內！」我尖叫，奪門而出，從天台一躍而下，肝腦塗地。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc29BocYGXq
171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7H7ydLX0sT
臨死前，我看見那東西了——不是蟻，是……
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說集《雜念集》。若此舉違規，煩請創挑主通知，願刪文。171Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu5tqdPG3rD
