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秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。她慢步於公園大道，有意無意踏在枯葉上。沙沙沙，聽來已然粉身碎骨，看來完好無缺。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv1k9th90Lv
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlx5FDhOoVY
「完好？」現在的她問。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOrTqvCgUTN
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDGqFD1VxgR
「無缺？」曾經的他問。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOoRRKfpFQe
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4nRpUHh4gZ
很多人說他生活美滿。家境富裕，頭腦聰明，五官英氣，身材高大。聞言他總是假笑，笑對方客氣得過份。奈何對方從未察覺他的笑容雖假，情感卻是真實而強烈的：他的確認為對方很過份。他想要的從不是這種生活，可惜每次對此表示厭棄時，總有人批評他不知足。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8s89XaRkQr
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6BXXUwa8XF
輕嘆一聲，繼續前行。踏踏踏，沙沙沙，聲聲撕心裂肺。像父母的哭罵，令人痛，也令人愧疚不安。無論他們如何呼天搶地，他終究永遠不會回來。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3jGXCTSJ00
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzaJGzSxOhl
遷入新居，展開新生。吃力，困難。已然表達得很清楚，對方還是假裝不知該使用哪個稱謂。有人說不介意，有人說很平常，話題和目光卻只停留在胯下之物。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXlhkT9yPiq
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpQaHBcYL7O
無處訴說的孤獨日夜縈繞不散。曾發誓永不後悔，曾以為自己是多麼堅毅勇敢，曾相信世界其實不是那麼單一而絕情……166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhU8BbPNGnF
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbXnMrivbQ2
步出公園，拐了幾個街口，來到醫院門前。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLxQCPu2geq
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRRODp24Qwh
「醫生，早晨。」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnP5Jwqebie
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBDwIFfdYVZ
「早晨。近來身體好嗎？」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUurSTmw7RV
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCgq7bvZxfJ
「好……不過……」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPM8Ackb3AB
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd8w8sQlQXU
「不過甚麼？」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqGqrkJIw0F
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhvKuwCydXb
「我想再做手術。」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWVYDThV4j5
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiLxQyXJOl8
「為甚麼？」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX7S4T3v7ZV
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgluHhicT4h
「不適應現在的生活。」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSFN9gUt6vP
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡajeGbJiFr0
「不適應身體的變化或是有其他困難？」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUUUO1kYUMV
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfTCzmuCjb5
「是生活上的困難……其實我很滿意現在的身體，我覺得這才是真正的自己！過往的我根本不是我！可惜旁人都不是這麼認為……」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn1xAWZUXTH
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9k6mX4WBKU
「所以你想要回以前的性別？」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRZP9uSk2MJ
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH3RECHZh4c
「不——我是不想要任何性別。」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8V8i5ahGuN
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9moRLRR80E
「噢……抱歉我還未能捕捉到你的思路。」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnWEQnBqslI
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsVQuN4sjMl
「這些日子，我遇到的問題大都源於旁人無法定徹底認同我是男或女。如果我沒有特定性別，可以在『男』、『女』、『跨性別』、『無性別』幾個類別之間遊走，可能會更自由！」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP838F4FSZ1
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM2rK1yo77c
「依我看來，你再次做手術之後，將要面對的問題會更多更嚴重。」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPkuakf3Q8o
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo25sHJKWas
「我理解你的意思，但我還是想要放手一搏——我堅信每次改變都會帶來新的可能、新的希望。」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPBfvmkZKpa
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0dWzOoZUok
「既然你堅持，我會按程序寫信轉介你去心理輔導部門作專業評估。」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfXDEFvKaFX
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9yDyZeiYaq
「謝謝你。」166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfdRUbF9oEs
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGwqTF1R5Yq
跟醫生多聊一會後，她步出醫院，再次走經公園。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhFT5yPim9N
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzX6usIdWbe
秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。她慢步於公園大道，有意無意踏在枯葉上。沙沙沙，聽來已然粉身碎骨，看來完好無缺。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxSwHQjdJlA
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡltDke9TM2P
「以前未完好。」現在的她說。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMCGebrntTN
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbHMzcx2StI
「將來會無缺。」曾經的他說。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDcDpHfpm4w
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXHpWXvNuy3
她笑了，笑自己傻，笑自己依然沉浸在幻想世界當中，相信自己的人生將來一定會變得完好無缺。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm57E63oG84
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuw65EUZ5Zv
明知無人能斷言明天一定會更好。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiiKvEXIdg3
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKjpLVQJGbk
奈何人總需要一個努力的原因、一個繼續活下去的原因。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqBd5NYekF8
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuy6hway88Z
那個原因名為「希望」。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjbcmosuaDn
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgNrJkB7END
「我定要繼續努力。」現在的她說。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsOFry0KAs4
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1gnkvMf4WO
「好好活下去吧。」曾經的他說。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8fyUzIKRoV
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBFb9qIEsKi
秋意綿綿，涼風颯颯，樹梢偶爾掉下幾片黃。166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB3x643qeCz
166Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuXOo3ebgd0
她慢步於公園大道，放眼欣賞沿路風景，不再留意地上的枯葉。
註：此篇另收錄於短篇小說合集《雜念集》
ns18.119.248.114da2
