Ch. 19
POV: KORI
Archer drops my hands, rubbing his face with his own hands. "I...I don't know how to deal with this," he says in a muffled voice.
"Does anyone ever know?" I lean back against the table. It's cute seeing Archer all flustered over Grace. "Just ask her out. Easy peasy."
Archer lifts his head and gives me a flat look before heading back towards the gridle. He flicks the dial on the side, turning it off, and scoops the remaining pancakes onto a plate. "Right, Kori. And tell me, have you asked your crush out?"
My mouth drops open at that, his question catching me so off guard that I'm momentarily speechless. How did he-
"Not that I'm assuming you have one," Archer continues, and I silently thank God that his back is to me. "That would be rude of me. If you do have one, though, I'd hope we're close enough that you wouldn't mind telling me. That was more of a general statement. As in, would you ask your crush out?"
I'm silent long enough for him to turn around.
He blinks and asks, "Why are you looking at me like that?"
My mouth opens and closes several times before I finally choke out, "How did you know you...liked Grace?"
Archer's eyebrows shoot up, and his entire face flushes red. "Why?"
"I just...want to know. Since she's liked you since freshman year."
He blinks again, and I mentally smack myself. A bit of nerves and I'm suddenly spilling everything. Grace, I owe you two milkshakes.
Archer leans back against the counter, scratching the back of his neck. "Well, it wasn't clear at first. She was just...Grace, you know? Until she wasn't, I guess. It's kind of hard to explain." His nose wrinkles. "To be honest, I didn't really like her when we first met in elementary school."
I gasp super loud. "What?! Archer having negative feelings for someone?"
He frowns at me. "Shush. It's not that I didn't like her, okay? It's more that she kind of confused me. I don't know if you remember well, but I was super proper as a kid."
"You still are."
"Are you going to keep interrupting, or can I talk?"
"Sorry, sorry."
"Anyways, she was just so much, sometimes. If she thinks you've made a stupid decision, she won't hesitate to let you know. It's like she has no inside voice, either. Every room she entered, she just took up all the air and space just from being there. Looking back, you and her were just about the only kids that treated me and Ryland normal and didn't fawn over us because of who our parents were. It was a little disorienting, honestly."
Archer leans his head back, eyes scanning the ceiling. He's smiling softly now. "She always spoke politely to me in those beginning years, but she looked at me like I was a rat or something she'd been tasked with feeding. And maybe that has to do with my dad, or how the other kids acted, but it's like she went out of her way to just treat me like I was another kid. And I guess a part of me liked that. I remember in middle school I would wear certain things because I knew she would point them out. It was just a way to get her to look my way, if even for a few seconds. Then high school came, and we got closer, but I could never understand why I needed her eyes on me so much. The five of us became so close, but it just wasn't enough. But honestly, I didn't make the connection until last year." He sighs for a moment, bringing his eyes back down to look at me. "Junior year, gym class. My hair was a bit longer then, if you remember, and I wore a bright green headband one day to keep it out of my face. She pointed it out, of course, and that's when I knew. If that makes any sense."
It does, and it doesn't. I shake my head. "But how can you look back and know that that was it?"
Archer shrugs helplessly. "I mean, I didn't know that I knew right then, you know? I was still a bit too twisted up in this endless back-and-forth of finding her frustrating and striving for her commentary. But when I look back, that was definitely the solidifying moment."
I continue staring at him.
"Okay, think about it like this," he says, bracing his forearms back against the counter so he can lean more comfortably. The muscles in his biceps shift with the movement, the thin material of his tank top doing nothing to hide his figure. "My mom once told me and Ryland that when you like someone, different emotions and behaviors show up first. They can be good, like admiration, pride, loyalty or respect. But they can be bad, too. Frustration, rivalry, envy, even hate sometimes. You wouldn't bother someone you don't care about, right? But someone who gets under your skin? Someone who makes you feel something, feel anything? That's who you pay attention to, because they invoke a certain passion in you." Archer pauses for a moment, shoving his hands into his pajama pockets. "Though, I'm not saying that every time you hate someone, it means you're secretly in love with them. Not at all. But perspective is important in those moments. Not saying I ever hated Grace, either. But being around Grace always sparked something in me. I'd see her smile, and it would make me sit up straighter. I'd hear her voice, and it would make my blood heat. I started looking forward to her comments, started realizing what I could do to make her say certain things or stare at me for longer. Does that make sense? I probably didn't explain it as well as my mom did. It sounded better coming from her."
I shake my head, a lump forming in my throat. "No, Archer, that was...that was good." I tug at the ends of my hair for a moment before asking, "What did Ryland think of all that?"
He shrugs again. "Who knows. We were, like, 11 when she told us that. He probably doesn't remember anymore."
I go silent again, thinking about everything Archer just told me. He's practically hit the nail on the head, and that both terrifies and excites me.
"Anyways," Archer says, pushing himself off the counter, "we should probably check-"
"What happened that day, Archer?" The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them.
The look Archer gives me makes me wish I could shoot up through the ceiling with a jetpack. "What day?" he asks cautiously.
"Over the summer," I say. "You know what I'm talking about."
His mouth drops open slightly, and his head shakes back and forth slowly. "N-No. No, Kori, I-"
"Archer," I plead, taking a step towards him. "Look, I've been thinking, and I really don't think Ryland was involved. There has to be something else, something we're all missing. It just doesn't make sense, and I don't believe that he'd-"
"Kori, please!" Archer explodes, reaching out and grabbing me by the shoulders. I suck in a sharp breath as he grips my shoulders tight, saying, "Stop it! Just stop!"
"Why?" I shoot back, and he gapes at me. "Don't you want to know what happened? How can you sit by and let these rumors spread about him!"
Archer's eyes narrow at me, and he releases my shoulders. Rubbing his eyes with one hand, he says slowly, "Kori, don't talk about things you don't have a clue about. Seriously. You don't know anything."
"That's the problem, Archer! No one knows anything!"
"You don't understand!" Archer snaps, glaring at me. "This is bigger than you, and if you get involved, people will get hurt! People he's been trying to protect for years!"
His words shock me into silence, and I stare at him.
Suddenly the front door swings open, causing us both to jump. A few seconds later, Ryland trudges into the kitchen, and any argument I would've given Archer dies on my tongue when he steps into view.
Archer springs into action instantly, his face melting back into a smile like the conversation we'd just had never happened. He places the plate of pancakes on the table and turns towards Ryland. I stay exactly when I am. "Hey, man," he says, gesturing towards the table. "You want to sit with us? We made pancakes, eggs, and bacon, and everything's just about done."
Ryland says nothing, glancing between us. He pushes a hand through his thick black hair, moving it from off his forehead, his face and arms gleaming with sweat. He's breathing hard, his cheeks are flushed red, and he's holding a grocery bag in his left hand.
I swallow, waggling my fingers in a weak attempt at waving. Archer's words ring in my head, making me feel sick. "Hey, you're...here."
His eyes flick over to me. "Well, considering this is my house, I don't know why you sound surprised."
It's not that I didn't think he'd come back. But I can't ignore the fact that I'd been worried that what happened this morning would erase the past two and a half weeks. That we'd simply fall back into what we used to be to each other. Knowing Ryland, he'd probably try and make me think I'd imagined the whole thing between us. Last night already feels like a fuzzy dream; the last thing I need is him calling me a moron for thinking he'd ever felt something for me.
"Ryland," I say before I lose my courage, "can we talk for a moment?"
His eyes narrow, and Archer shoots me a glance, saying, "M-Maybe it can wait until after breakfast? The eggs are probably getting cold-"
"No, no." Ryland tosses the grocery bag to Archer, who fumbles with it before catching it. Ryland crosses his arms over his chest, and my gaze fixes on his biceps. "I'm all ears, Kiwi." He nods towards the foyer, and then turns and walks away.
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TO BE CONTINUED...
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Ooh.
-Zuffy <3
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