A little history. This actually was an assignment back when I was in 8th grade, or basically when I first got a little more serious about writing. We were told to just write, nevermind the errors, but we HAD to use the phrase "As poor Richard says: “Lost time is never found again.”"464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhz4hCH0VYF
Was I thinking or high while writing this? Idk. Again, this was EARLY into my writing career and for a Highschool project.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDQBe3wmfDf
Published to Wattpad March 9, 2015.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN3Kkc7Nyj7
THIS IS, a story about two epic people, STEVE AND PHIL!!!! This story tells about one reason of why Phil is more epic than a Steve. This takes place in the Cavern of Spiders. The situation... Steve is wasting time trying to move a big pig that breaths fire out of the way alone while Phil calls upon his friends to come and help. This is that story of STEVE, PHIL, AND THE FIRE BREATHING PIG!!!!!! Steve is a simple red head boy and Phil is a simple white head boy.464Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOudCB2lBH2
“I AM STEVE AND I AM AN EPIC TROOPA CAUSE IMMA MOVE THIS FIRE BREATHING PIG CORPSE OUT OF THE WAY BY MY SELF!!!!” Steve screamed. Phil glared at Steve and snorted, “STEVE!!!! SHUT YO FACE YOU DIRTY RED HEAD!!!! No one except for Billy can move that thing.” “What eva, we gots us some ten days to get it moved. I can do this Phil and-” “-And waste our time!”
Steve stuck TNT in the pigs mouth and lit it. Phil's eyes grew wide and round as the TNT exploded behind Steve. Steve was black now and coughing up smoke. When he turned around, he roared. “Well, have fun trying to move that thing man.”
And so it went, Steve tugged and pushed and shoved and blew things up but still he could not move the pig. This went on for five days. As he growled, Phil walked by humming but stopped to chat with Steve, “How are ya doing Stevey?” Steve hurled around with an ugly, steaming face. Phil laughed and continued to walk on as Steve kicked the pig but Steve broke his right foot as a result however.
Day nine came and went as Steve continued to use C4, TNT, Pipe Bombs, and Grenades but still the pig had not been moved. Before Steve knew it, the time had come. In one minute, he would be fired for not moving the fire breathing pig. Steve screamed and ran around until he finally passed out from the strain of working for ten days straight.
“Ok, he has learned his lesson... BILLY!” Billy the purple haired boy walked up to the pig, grabbed it, and threw it on top of a pile of dead fire breathing pigs. “He wasted so much time... he will never get that back Phil. Meanwhile you used your time to have a fun life, Billy mumbled. Phil laughed as Steve's eyes changed to x(s).
As poor Richard says: “Lost time is never found again.”
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