Melody sat silently in Spanish class without participating. Becky’s empty seat was too much of a distraction as Melody continued to ponder her whereabouts. Her heart ached for her, and as much as she tried to stop, Melody could not help herself from imagining Becky walking through the door, hugging her tightly, and saying everything was alright. After the bell rang, Melody packed her bookbag and left the classroom with her head down. She was off tonight and decided the best thing to do was to go home and take a hot bath. As Melody drove home, a thought suddenly came to her. What if Becky was looking for her mother? She dismissed the idea after failing to come up with a sensible reason. Becky had no use for her mother. She then pondered the possibility of Becky’s mysterious boyfriend killing Walt before they left town together. Melody then wondered if she would hear from Becky around September, after her baby was born. Tired of constantly thinking, Melody parked in front of her house and walked towards the front door, wanting nothing more than to soak in the bathtub.
“Young lady, get in here!” Barbara shouted before Melody had both feet in the house. Melody saw her mother standing on the opposite side of the kitchen table, with a scowl on her face and her arms crossed underneath her bosom. Melody was taken aback, having never seen her mother look at her in such a way.
“What’s going on?” Melody asked, completely caught off guard.
“How long was there a sexual relationship between you and Becky? Tell me the truth!” Barbara demanded.
Melody looked down at the table and saw a package that had been opened. She saw her name on it and immediately knew it had to be from Becky. Without answering her mother, Melody grabbed the box and slid it towards her.
“Put that down and answer me!” Barbara ordered.
“You opened my mail?” Melody protested.
“Opening your mail is the least of your concerns right now, Melody,” Barbara barked. “You brought that harlot into this house and had relations with her! How could you do such a thing? You’re a child of Christ!”
Melody’s attention was still focused on the box. She reached inside and pulled out the letter from Becky. Seeing that it had been opened, she held the envelope before her mother.
“You read this?”
“Yes and it sickened me! What you did with her sickened me. I’m ashamed of you and your promiscuity. Was that girl worth your eternal soul?”
“You had no right to read this!” Melody yelled, feeling her own anger grow.
“Lower your voice! Your father and I have the right to know everything that goes on in this house. We have the right to know you allowed Satan to enter our home. What else have you been doing? Did you and Becky use drugs?”
Melody said nothing.
“You are going to answer me even if I have to force it out of you with a belt,” Barbara warned. “How long has this been going on with Becky?”
“None of your goddamn business!”
Melody’s hands formed tight fists as her lips curled back like a wild dog. Her sparkling blue eyes now burned with fury as Melody prepared to fight. Barbara was momentarily shocked into silence, not only by her daughter’s blasphemy, but how her daughter had suddenly transformed herself into a figure of seething hatred. Barbara took a step back, fearing Melody would leap over the table to attack her.
“Melody!” she gasped as her own voice cracked.
Melody ignored her and put the envelope back in the box. She then wrapped her arms around it protectively, pulling the box tightly against her body.
“You will not speak to me using the devil’s words!” Barbara fired back after regaining her courage. “How dare you take the Lord’s name in vain! I am your mother and you will honor me! It is too late for Becky, but you can still save yourself from the fires of hell. You must repent for your sins and pray for forgiveness.” Barbara stopped ranting as Melody’s face turned white before her eyes. Barbara’s heart sank upon realizing her error. In the heat of the moment, she had forgotten Melody did not yet know.
“What did you say?” Melody asked softly. “It’s too late for Becky? What does that mean, Mother?”
“Melody I-”
“You heartless old bitch! Fuck you!”
Melody ran out of the room with the package in her arms. She bolted up the stairs as if the devil himself was on her heels. Melody flew into her room, slammed the door shut, and locked it. Not a minute later, her mother’s hurried footsteps came up the stairs and approached her door. Melody backed away as the doorknob rattled. Then, an angry fist pounded on the door.
“Melody!” Barbara bellowed. “Open the door this instant!”
“Go away! Leave me alone!”
“Open this door or I will break it down!”
Melody took a deep breath and hollered for all she was worth. “You step one foot in this room, and I’ll throw myself out the window!
Silence.
Melody was shaking uncontrollably. She needed to know what Becky had written to her. She was furious her mother had read it first and knew something she did not. She stared at the door, knowing her mother was still standing just outside. Melody was serious. She was not bluffing like she had been before, with Becky and the necklace. Melody was mentally preparing to turn around and throw herself through a plane of glass, without a care for the consequences. It was her mother’s call. Melody finally breathed a little easier when she heard her mother’s footsteps retreating in defeat.
Melody sat in her rocking chair and read Becky’s letter. Her eyes were expressionless and her hands clammy with moisture. When she finished reading, she did not cry, she did not scream, she simply sat. Melody felt nothing, as if she was in someone else’s dream. Her heartbeat fluttered as her breathing quickened and became shallow. Her eyesight turned blurry. Her stomach twisted upon itself. She could not feel her fingers or toes. Melody was in shock. She would remain sitting in her chair, unmoving and silent, for the next two hours.
A light tap on the door finally brought Melody out of her daze. It was her mother. “Melody, I brought you something to eat.”
Melody did not answer. She couldn’t. She could not speak. Her mind had forgotten how to pronounce words. Her tongue lay in her mouth uselessly, with no recollection of how to produce speech. Melody had become mute. She continued to stare at the wall as she heard her mother place a tray by the door and walk away.
Melody did not need to eat. She knew the truth now and nothing would ever matter again. Her mother, the pastor, and the Sunday school teachers had been right all along. She had sinned, and now, her punishment had begun. God was angry and had brought His wrath down on both her and Becky. To punish them, they had to be separated, and to do this, one of them had to die. Becky’s soul had fallen into the abyss of everlasting fire and torment. She was alone, forever burning, never to know comfort again.
Melody trembled now, realizing her own fate. God would surely kill her as He had killed Becky. But first, Melody had to agonize in the knowledge that she was the cause of Becky’s death and final judgement. It was she who had given herself over to lust and seduced Becky. For that deadly sin, God had no mercy.
“It’s all my fault,” Melody thought. “Becky was punished because of me and now it’s my turn. God knows I will not survive this. I’m to die of a broken heart!”
Melody further surmised God was cruel, dangling salvation in front of her, like bait on a hook. If Melody would only fall to her knees and beg Jesus for forgiveness, she could save herself from Becky’s fate, but God knew she wouldn’t dare. She was not truly sorry. Melody had enjoyed Becky’s body. Melody missed her kisses and being held in her arms. She missed talking to her and sharing their innermost secrets. She missed her smile and laughter. Melody loved Becky in every conceivable way, and for that, she could never repent. It was then Melody decided to never pray again.
“Why should I escape hell after what I did to Becky? How can I possibly spend eternity in the Kingdom of Heaven, a perfect paradise, as Becky screams in eternal anguish?”
Melody’s mind was made up. She would die in her sins along with Becky. She would rather suffer with her, than accept salvation without her. As her mind continued to cloud over, Melody compared herself to Judas Iscariot. He too was filled with remorse upon learning the truth, but only after it was too late. What choice did he have but to hang himself after betraying his best friend? Knowing what she would have to do, Melody bowed her head and accepted her fate.
ns 15.158.61.8da2
