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Dear Husband,
This will amuse you, knowing I am writing a letter to you because of a writing competition. You would say, “yes, use our love for victory!”
Unfortunately… or fortunately depending on who you talk to – this will probably not win because I love you. Seven years in and I still love you. We aren’t fictional characters with roaring love affairs or secret families. There is no jealousy, drama or supernatural flares. We’re just… normal, everyday people you see at a food court.
We still have habits from being young, poor university students. We still buy one large plate of cheap Chinese and a bottle of coke and share it. We still share chocolate bars on long drives. We still have small, human intimate moments of two people sharing a blanket against the cold.
We should probably turn on the heater. We can afford it now.
But that’s what love is, isn’t it? It’s not large declarations of love or dramatic sacrifices. It’s the small sacrifices of half-eaten chocolate bars and sharing a coffee mug because we can’t be bothered washing the other one.
You have loved me so wholeheartedly this whole time. There has never been a moment where I thought you didn’t love me. Sure, you’ve gotten things wrong or upset me. You’ve been careless and thoughtless. But you were never too proud to come back and help me fix it.
You’re still a little rough around the edges. Still need to be reminded to shower and to eat. To not swear in front of my mother… or show the church kids your tattoos.
Our beginnings were rough. But we’re past who we were. That’s for another letter full of dramatic choices, drugs and religious changes. That’s who we were.
But now? Now we’re boring. And boring is good. Boring means we made it through the war to live in peace. We harnessed our pasts and now you work with at risk kids. I’m so proud of you, watching you get your degree, stand up to your parents, love me so selflessly.
Now we have a one-year-old. He is everything we were and more. He is reckless, fearless, demanding, and so wonderfully and frustratingly clever. He stands on cliffs and shouts nonsense at the sky. He is the reward for the choices we chose. A little like raising a baby dragon without wings… but still, so bright and excited for his own future.
You have been such a wonderful father. You always have time to play, to cuddle, to sing to him. You always forgive, always try, always come back. You are more of a father than both yours and mine together. Because you stayed the whole time. Even when distance separated us, we knew it was for us. You never stopped working for your son.
Thankyou for loving me. For working for us. For stopping to listen. You are my first choice in every scenario. You are my laughter, my love, my light. I know we have worked so hard to be here. To find a small peace. And I know we have much to go.
But.
Thankyou for loving me through it all.
Thankyou for that one day a year for the past four years. That day you let me dress you up and we go on adventures. We have been Beauty and the Beast, Rapunzel, medieval folk because I was pregnant and nothing fit and Pokémon players with our very own smallish Pikachu.
I hope we continue it forever.
Because it’s a celebration that we made it.
With much love,
Your Wife.
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