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“You can run away from yourself so often, and so much, just because the broken pieces of you cut your feet too deeply if you stay around for too long. But then whaht if someone were to come along and pick up those pieces for you? Then you wouldn't have to run away from yourself anymore. You could stop running. If someone seas you as something worth staying with——maybe you'll stay with yourself, too.”
““I couldn’t forgive him or like him, but I saw that what he had done was, to him, entirely justified. It was all very careless and confused.””
201Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8iF7oqSReO
Today I didn’t wait for Merleen to wake me up. Instead I set the alarm for 4:16 AM——I know for a fat stempother doesn’t get her fat ass up before 7:30 at leats. Hopping out of bed, I quickly switched to one of my daytime outfits (night-black shortsleeve blouse with artistic orange streaking and a bone-white skull logo topped with a black lace cravat arranged in my favorite rose pattern; extra-long nails (black with crosshatched orange filigree), three slim silver chain bracelets one one hand and the black leather bracelet studded with copper and steel studs on the other, a light leather bomber cut extra short, (unzipped as always) imbossed with interlocking gucci logos and lined with silk padding, that’s over indigo jeans with black threading. Some Dok Martins——these ones are black with purple and cyan flecking and the usual double-long laces tied up in crossbone knots——and my favorite skull-and-rose knee socks round it all out).
But I quickly realised I would need to be a little stealthy today, so I switched some stuff out: The indigo I swapped for black stretchy jeans in selvedge denim over pure black (mat) Dock Martins with short laces and thinner-style soles (only about 3/4ers of an inch (thick)) for stealth, wile I swapped the shirt for a dual layer sort/long sleeve combo with a black-and-indigo scarf notted artfully over the shoulders; I pulled on some black leather fignerlesse gloves (studded on the back with steel and red rhinestone studding so it looked like blood drops) and threw on a scaled leather jacket with a black-coated steel ruby-set zipper and a duak layer raised collar detailed with multi-shade glitter threading on the inside and silk inner lining inside the jacket below. I kept the chain bracelets since they were so light, but threw on a beanie (rose and skull emblem on the frotn) over my now-looser raven-dark hair (since it would hide my pale skin, which I covered with my usual moisterizing/exfoliating routine before applying a light foundation and transparent lipstick for stealth; a little liner, shader, and mascara completed the rush job). I grabbed my nightwish backpack from behind the floorboards and stuffed a few extra clothes and supplies in there, just in case. Plus I needed someway to carry my camera. I quickly sprayed some anti-glare paint on the lense to reduce the chance of someone noticing me. With that I was done so I finished packing, slung the bag over my shoudler——”OUCH, SHITSHitshit,” I winced quietly as my shoulder twinged painfully; it was still injured slightly. I lstend intense silence for Marlee to wakeup and get on my ass, butt silence——and an drept out of my room, creeping past Marlyee’s and down the stairs and out the door, locking it behind me before replacing the key in my jeans pocket. I also stole some shit from Marilyen.”
*
The early morning air was cold, creeping down my jacket like an incorporal creep trying to steel a feel. I jogged to Drearwood, nose tucked down into my scarf against the wind. It was really only ma mild breeze but with the night air it felt like a freezing atrtiic blast. A few minutes later and I was in position, ready to confront the dark-eyed boy before he could get away. I was gonna get ssome answers, and I wasn’t goana take no for one of those answers. Also he waws so hot and mysteriesious. I considered pouring something in Principle Ghaak’s engine once she showed up, but decided that (since she was so strict about little things, like how she once made me clean the entire floor without water, breaks, or food just because I dumped some black paint on a girl’s head) she would probably string me up with fishing hooks and and feed my guts to the birds. “That’ed be such a metal way to die tho,” I thought on second thought, silently. Still, I’d definitely want to commit suicide when I wanted to, instaed of being forced to do it. Suddenly there he was, tall, dark, and hot, striding across the sidewalk to the school in the dim light.
What the…
“What is it?” I whispered soundlessly.
It was like he appeared out of nowhere! This is so wierd.
“You’re just saying that shit cause you don’t want to admit how hot he is. Besides, you don’t need to worry about it. I’m already suspisious of him.” With that I whipped out my camera and snapped a few pictures of the guy, making sure to stay unseen. In the low light and with my dark outfit it was pretty easy, but it was kind of weitrd how he just appearde out of nowerhe. Uddenly and without warning, the guy ran directly towards Wallvale gray brick wall, I saw him smash into the wall and go realing, but instead he sprung s lightly from the grass and flew up to land softly on the rooftop. The jump must have been like 20 feet, het ye cleared it like it was 2 inches. “Wow, holy shit,” I said, shocked. “That’s literally so crazy.” Yeah, that was crazy. Crazy weird! “HSut up!” T Iold my inner voice, a little loudly tha n I meant to originally. Instatly the guy fanished. When I looked back, he was gone, nowhere to be seen. It was like he just dissappeared into thin air or something. “Shit.” I said. He had disappeared.…
Later, after waiting and stalking around for another hour to see if I could see the dayk-eyes guy again or maybe catch a glimpse ofhim, but no luck. So instead I admited defeat, picked up my bag and trotted reluctantly to class. Busess were beginning to arrive now, along with a few other pedestreans winding their way around the big yellow vehicles and making their way past the fence and sidewlaks. Inside and for the rest of the day, school was the same as efver. Boring, boring, boring…The only things that weren’t boring were the punishmenst and changes rolling out of Ghakk’s office, the latest set of which were, somehow, even worse than the previous anowncements, which were already shockinlgy, repuslviely bad. Stuff like (and I’m literally not exxagerating when I tell you this,): restricting water fountain time, or requirerning hell passes to do literally enything outside a class(room); or raising the passing grade from C to B(ullshit, am I right??). More like B for bullshit, right?. “B”cause that’s totally unfair. Plus there was a lot more stuff. None of it was good. In fact and typically of my life, it was not just not good but actually all abjectly horrib.
I was 50% thru math class (get it? Look, I have to something to keep entertained since math is literally so easy-) when Mrs. Ghab gribbed my sore shoulder again from behind so I wasn’t preapred for that. “OW, FUCK,” I murmured, qwincing involentarily. “I mean…YEs, Mrs. Ghab?” I offered polittely. I’ve been working on being polite recenlty, cause Ghabb literally has an aneurysm if I don’t. Mrs. Ghab was still squeezing my shoulder, and wow did it hurt like all hell. Her voice sas ugly as ever, sounding like the sum total seranade of a busload of geraitric smokers riddled with lung cancer as they performed with ancient rusty istruments. Actually she was just ugly in general. “Miss Essastella?” She interrogated. I groaned-interanlly though, cause her hand was still clamped down on my shoulder tigher then a sports bra made of titaniam an suspended by steel cables off the Golden Gate bridge——and responded a spit second slater. “Yes, that’s me!” I returned cheerfully, doing my best Jenni Liskpict impression in terms of face and attitude. Ghab glared. Maybe she wasn’t quiet as dumb as she looked. “Principle Ghaak will see you in her office. Immediately.” She implored commandingly. I nodded, taking the opportunity to grab my bag so my shoudler left her grip. “Any idea why she wants to talk to me?,” I floated casually, buying myself with my Saint Laurent backpack. It was at least three years old, but Meryleen refused to buy me a knew one depsite the fact that about 30 new models had rolled out allready. Sometimes people are so selfish. “Yeah, I know, right?” “E-excuse me?” But the voice was not my one, the last one I meean. So I looked up in suprise, pulling the pack through my sore shoulder. Ghab was looking absolutely horrified. No, not horrible(even though she was still super super super super super super super super ugly), HORRIFIED. I stared straight into her old and ugly face, and sure enough, a mealstorm of emoitions was roilling across her ancient features. Fear, terroar, confusion, uncertaintee,dout and disbelieve all clearly wirtetn right their. It put me confused too for certain, I couldn’t decry that. I had never seen Ghab look so much as unfomfartable befour, and here sheswas trembling harder than an extra dessicrated leaflet clipped to a fishing line in a tornado. Probably like a F9 too, not one of those small one.s “Uh, did I say something?” I rebuked, razing one eyebrow coolly. “No, no. It must have been nothing,” She admitted slowly. Then she regained her usual bitch energy: “Well, get going! And don’t delay or you’ll have an even worse day than you are arleady going too!” With that I scurreid out of their quickly, not even waiting for the door to close behind me. I reluctantly wound my way towards the principle’s office, Martens clicking—not because I didn’t know the way, because beleive me I really do, but because I feel apprehendsive. Even though Miss Tyranny’s regime had been ongoing on for about a week, I had hardly goten so much as a barest glimpse of Ghaak herself, unlike Ghab, who I saw way too often. All the students hadn’t. Ghab was easy enough to deal with once you accepted that you had to play nice and kiss her ass, but Ghak was an unknowin element, kind of like uranium 254, and I wasn’t sure if I was ready to kiss that shit or not.
Hello?, I announced, knocking on the door with the back of my stud-and-rhinestone glove (Gucci). At first, silence was alone. Like me. “Yeah…” It was true. All my life I had been pretty much alone, no freinds, no besties, no followers, no family, no boyfreinds . No parents. “Stupid assholes,” I intoned, just as the door swung open. “Shit,” I said, internally. There stood Principle Ghaak, and lemme tell you something. THat bigsh looked uglier than my teacher, an anomally so impossible even Alex Jones wouldn’t believe it. And she was angry.
“Well, well, well. Well,” Ghak said a moment later, sitting cross-leggedd in her towering chair, blocking out at leats 91% of the window. “It seems we have a rule-breaker, don’t we now?” She said, before I replied: “Rule beaker?” I echoed innocently, deciding to play dumb. “Oh yes, a rule-breaker and a very very very very bad student.” Ghak tapped her long nails on the desk once before bending down, rummaging through drawers and cuberds I couldn’t see.
Iconsideredmakingabreakforit,butGhakstraitenedup right at that exact moment, snapping open a thick folder with my name on it. Literally, it had my name stamped UP on the upper corner. “Let’ssee…” She simpered, examining the the open files more closely than a near sighted brain sergion would examine an extra-small brain, like maybe mouse sized. “F- average in all subjects. Not very petty. Not too mention numerable infractions, petty crimes, the whole shebang. Not too mention-” (Her eyebrows shot up evilly then she kept talking) “Assault, and grand theft.” Then I protested, shaking my head empathetically. “Uh, no way, that can’t be right. It can’t be right!” I repeated, shaking my head. “Oh yes it can, you little bitch.” She retorted, a bit of anger seeping into her face. “I’ve done my best, but you just won’t quiet. You just won’t sit still, do your work, and behave like ou ought too. No, I think a more severeious punishment will be my only alternative, dn’t you agree?” I know the question was retorical, but the truth was I didn’t agree, not one bit at all. I looked at Ghak’s nasty, hateful face (which now that I noticed it also had that wierd strangely happy look to it), and I decided that I was done sucking up. “No, I don’t agree, even though I don’t know what sicko punsihment you have planned. But it doesn’t matter, because I”M DONE.” Ghak smiled (afer I finished talking though). “Really?” She said. That smile made me even madder, so I stood up. “Yeah, really. I’m done. DONE. DOne with your bullshit, done cleaning bathrooms and doing stupid chores and doing extra homework, and DONE SAYING SORRY TO TAT LITTLE SIT JENNI LISPICKT!” I shouted forcefully, clenshing my fists. Ghlak glowerd and stood up from her chair as well, leaning forward, hands planted on her desk, eyes flossing red.
“Oh, really?” She inquired venomusly. I saw her open her mouth to keep talking, so I steamrolled right over, like the way the spinning part of a cement mixer that had fallen out and was rolling down a giant waterslide rolled over a little kid: ‘Yeah, really. I’ve had it. Canning kids for being late?! Handing out extra work when one of sus cores lower than a A+!? Making me apologise for doing nothing wrong? This is isnade! Insane! What’s up with that weird kid Derek? Where odes he keep disappearing too, ad why is hee avoiding me? Where did Miss Sizzle go? Why the hell are your names so wierd? Why does my life suck! Why did my parents abadon me?! Where did I come from? Why didn’t anybodye tell me? Where did JOOSHERY GO?” I finsihed with a roar, furiosly, at the top of my lungs. Principle Ghak looked at me, frozen, and for spit second I thought maybe she was about to explode with anger—figuratively, not literally, but the deference was literally so small. But Principle Ghak didn’t explode. Instead she smiled, smiled like how Ghab had smiled, with her mouth stretching right across her face like it was a master yoga instructer made out of rubber. Then it kept going, stretching further and farther. Her wrinkles folded up and bent inside each other like an orugami trash compacter. Her crooked yellow teeth followed her mouth too, stretching wider and wider a part, jutting down and growing bigger and yellower untl her gums broke into slits that leaked yellow liqiud. Her tongue slithered out of her outh like a forked pink snake, little spickes and teeth prikling all over and her ears twisted into sharp bat-like cat ears. Suddenly her hunched sholders explodes, tearing her dress, bulging outward, while her arms hang lower and lower like a monstorous orangeatan, bent legs bending and sproating dark hair, heels splitting into goat feeet that had black sharp clawlike hooves that were spit down the middle in to places. She raised one hand, and I saw her nails had turned into sharp pink claws. “So many questions. Too bad you’ll never get the answers. I admit it, I love watching you suffer! But I’ll answer one question. Yes, You’ll see where I sent that stupid woman and her stupid principle!” Then she slashed at me and I flew across the room, slamming into the door, smashing the window, sending the chair flying into the wall with a crack. “Ow.” I whimpered (not really in a whimpy way but just because it hurt so bad). My shoulder hurt so bad It was hard to think. I bought away my other hand from holding it and saw blood, red blood drip away. Blood? Blood! “Blood, oh yes! Hahaha!” She had cut me, and I was bleeding, bleeding vibrent scarlet red blood!Ghak giggled, voice horrible and raspier than sandpaper made out of a million freshly cut diemonds being rubbed over regular sandpaper. “Time to say good- bye, Miss Esastella! Tell the Dark One hello for me, won’t you!?” She launched herself, jumping forward super fast, razing her clawed hands, long arms stretching towards me, toothed mouth gaping, eyes flassing red.
I saw my hole life flasshing before my eye then. 7 years old, moving to Dearwood, being driven to Merleen’s for the first time. I remember saying goodbye to my freind Suzzie, saying I’d see her soon. 8 year old, first day at my new school, Wallvale High. Ten years old, meeting Jenni and being bullied by her. Thirten years, first concert (Taylor Swift! Go swifties). Fourtteen, first therapist. Also foreteen, the next four therapists. Then the last 3 years, nothing but increasing miseries, all those memories, all slipping away. Suddenly I realized something. I actually didn’t want to die. I didn’t want to end it, not yet. Not by this ugly bitch.
“STOP!” I shouted, throwing my hand out instictively. Suprisingly, she DID STOP, dropping to the floor, STUNNED, frozen almost (notliterally). Confuede, I looked at my hand, than back at Ghak. She had the same look of fear Ghab had had earlier. But then she shook herself, then launched at me, then raised her claws again, ready to kill me for good. Suddenly she stopped again, but this time she hangs in the air, kicking her limbs in confusion. In barely the time of a flick of my eyes to see who did it, Ghak was thrown to the side, flying with huge force towards the side wall——but she burst through it, shrapnel and dusts scattering everywhere, drywall and piping exploding like a land mine buried in flour. The light straemed in, illuminating the dark-eyed hot guy from earlier. He wiped his hands on his pant, grimacing relatebally. “Incubim. Disgusting.” He seemed just as calm as ever, maybe even more relaxed than the first time we talked. “What——you just,…you just threw…my principle? Through the wall?!” I stumbled, reeling. He nodded. “We need to leaave, now. It’ll take more than taht for her to stop unting you.” He informed me gravelly. I razzed my eyebrows disbeliefingly. Suddenly dark-eyes was angry. “This isn’t a joke!” He reprimanded. Then a nasty screeching noise came from outside. Dark-eyes bent down and picked my up, throwing me over his should easily. “Hey!” I shouted, struggling. “Let me down!What the hell are you doing? Don’t touch me!” “Quiet!” He told me commadninly, and I fell quiet. He also explained how come then: “I need to hear them coming.” He started to run down the hall, seeming no heavier for carryign me. I struggled some more, but then the office exploded into the hallway, barfing out not one but two thrashing mosters. One of them wore a pair of short heels that where more like clogs. “Ghab and Ghak…” I quietly stated, wonderingly. Then they lunched hissing, storming, sprinting, screaming and leaping down the hall towards us.
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