5樓127號枱,是這裏了,我坐到指定座位上,與對面的半機械人點頭微笑,他也友善地說了聲「你好」。他溫和的男性聲音很自然,應該還保留著原聲帶吧。315Please respect copyright.PENANA6u14Y0Qb2c
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根據規矩,今晚所有實驗體都會二人一枱共享晚餐,然後在0:00am時,全部都會被處決。315Please respect copyright.PENANAxwJtZzXqyX
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我不明白為甚麼外星人要定這麽一道規距,在他們眼中這會比較浪漫嗎?營造只有人類會重視的儀式感,在臨終前好好與世界道別,還是要強調我們就如螻蟻,連死之前都要在控制之下?315Please respect copyright.PENANA3uN2J93M9v
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甚麼原因也好,都沒有實際上的差別,尤其是對我來說,只是吃一頓飯而已。這十多年來,如果沒有記錯的話,應該有這麽久了,我一直在接受精神穩定實驗,外星人把我訓練到面對任何事都心如止水,情緒不會泛起一點波動。不知多少公升的鎮靜劑和不明藥物注射到我體內,現在我的血液都是由這些液體組成的。315Please respect copyright.PENANAzJiOJZrXni
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半機械人同桌的身體被金屬覆蓋著,只有胸口和手掌心位置露出原本的皮膚,由兩個鏡頭組成的雙眼望著我悠閒地吃烤魚,有點錯愕地定神觀察了我一會。315Please respect copyright.PENANAOMJpuy0wTK
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附近126號枱的小女孩拒絕用餐,坐她旁邊的老婆婆就吞下陶瓷碗,125號枱的半蛇人在吃同桌男人的長頭髮,半機械人環顧四周,就只有我一個在欣賞美食。我悠哉悠哉地擠著檸檬,果汁一滴一滴慢慢落到烤魚上。315Please respect copyright.PENANASNnJzukaZr
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以前某個人總是喜歡上下搖動檸檬,的確能擠出很多檸檬汁,但常常濺到別人的食物上,然後露出傻笑說不好意思,久而久之我便提醒自己擠檸檬汁時要冷靜點吧。315Please respect copyright.PENANAc8eunx8BUF
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「你不害怕?」半機械人抬起鋼鐵頭顱,兩片銀色嘴唇上下開合。315Please respect copyright.PENANAdk1ciMZoUA
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「我已經被改造得沒有情感和情緒了,可能死掉才是解脫。」315Please respect copyright.PENANA0Idumov6o4
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「那麽你的實驗是成功的,不用跟我們一起銷毀才對。」315Please respect copyright.PENANACWO1p9nMY1
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「不知道呢,或者我已經沒有用處,他們到底想從人類研究甚麼?」我知道這問題沒有答案,但還是問了出來,十多年來都在問,習慣成自然了。315Please respect copyright.PENANAu0KVmlIWp7
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「我也想知道,但已經沒有機會。」他垂下頭,到目前為止都沒有吃過東西。315Please respect copyright.PENANATtLxesulu2
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「可以問一下你的實驗是甚麼嗎?」我終於有機會跟半機械人正式交流,平日我們都困在各自的實驗室裏,有時我會被帶到其他地方,算是比較特別,但從未跟其他人說過話。315Please respect copyright.PENANAK67DENBhsa
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通常半機械人都是在人類的身體上逐少逐少裝上零件,置換四肢和器官,最後是機械大腦。至於我為甚麼會知道,皆因外星人逼我看著手術過程,直至能忍受血腥畫面為止。如今竟然安排他跟我一起,外星人真是壞心眼,我都認不出有沒有看過他的手術。315Please respect copyright.PENANAHc97aZbLiZ
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他只是很平靜地回答我:315Please respect copyright.PENANAeBwt0t3EYp
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「是研究最普通的「機械與人體契合度」,不過換海馬體的時候我就失去了實驗前的大部分記憶,完全忘掉過去的自己是個怎樣的人,只記得一些零碎片段。」315Please respect copyright.PENANAPIDXZN9bHD
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「例如呢?」315Please respect copyright.PENANAXb2wox9dmp
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「大概是讀中學時打雙人羽毛球賽,本來想向對手來個殺球,出盡全力揮球拍打下去,氣勢十足,卻打中隊友的鼻子。」315Please respect copyright.PENANAuezdC4jy7G
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我點點頭,正常人可能會笑,或是覺得隊友很慘,大概會這樣想?315Please respect copyright.PENANAmn9Jhtua7u
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「還有我有談戀愛,但忘了對方是誰,跟她一起很快樂、很安心。這些都只是很普通的事而已。」315Please respect copyright.PENANAPRkpgvzUKq
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「普通的日子才可貴。」315Please respect copyright.PENANAHHVdNI1oHm
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「你以前有喜歡的人嗎?即使現在沒有感覺,總有一些回憶?」315Please respect copyright.PENANA4g5sx1hw68
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我不敢回憶那段暗戀,如果連想起他都沒有任何感覺,那會是非常恐怖的事。315Please respect copyright.PENANAmGCEUBtf2S
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可是,面對生命的終結,或許應該面對這件事,我說:315Please respect copyright.PENANAtJTLNlQJ6z
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「有一個暗戀了很久的同事,一見鍾情甚麼的,自己都不相信會這樣。他有女朋友,我從來都不讓他察覺,大約如此。」就是那個擠檸檬汁的傻子。315Please respect copyright.PENANAyJYWLIWClB
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半機械人試著用鋼鐵的臉擺出可惜的表情,實際上只有兩塊嘴唇向下移,說:315Please respect copyright.PENANAM6tlnfKz7U
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「你還記掛著他吧。」315Please respect copyright.PENANA2fgbm3hGHn
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「可能是。」我不打算繼續說,有關他的片段要衝破腦內的防線逃出來。315Please respect copyright.PENANA1y7eu8BZey
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第一次見面是在升降機裏,他一個大學畢業生穿著新買的西裝,提早15分鐘來到我公司面試。他為了留下好印象,見人就打招呼,笑容可掬,那一刻的微笑實在可愛,讓我深深記住,但同時我又覺得他太世故,要觀察他一段日子。315Please respect copyright.PENANAlE3Y6P71kK
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成為同事之後才發現他對誰都很熱情,就算連我這個極少跟人談話的資訊保安主任,他都想真心跟我做朋友。他看到我的電腦布桌是日本雪景,去日本旅遊時就寄雪景明信片給我;公司要求同事參加討厭的體育聯誼活動時,他就說自己平日都有做運動便代替我出席。315Please respect copyright.PENANASGc8xVEuND
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他臉上的笑容太過燦爛,顯得陰沉的我更加黑暗,他不是我該觸及的陽光,他跟女朋友一起就好了,不需要留意我,不需要把時間放在我身上。315Please respect copyright.PENANA1yw8FMOhdE
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我就是害怕想起這些。315Please respect copyright.PENANAQM4fhIfuYV
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就像我這種人,才適合做精神穩定實驗。沒有讓人羨慕的幸福,沒有特別的痛苦,對一切事物都不曾激動過似的,就像一張白紙,不需要洗去原有的顏色,只要加一層顏料,發現洗得掉,就再加一層更深更厚的顏料,這也洗得掉,不斷重複,鍛鍊成不會染上色彩的物料。315Please respect copyright.PENANAlvLAskk3BN
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我吃下最後一塊烤魚,半機械人剛剛開始吃,他的鐵手指又長又幼,拿起杯子喝水的樣子非常自然,仿佛沒有被改造過。他另一手拾起檸檬塊,笨拙地一邊擠一邊上下搖動,幾滴檸檬汁濺到我的空碗裏。315Please respect copyright.PENANAgXy8VzWF0L
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很酸。315Please respect copyright.PENANAvhRSTAGanK
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濃烈的酸味使我牙齒發軟,不自覺地吞了吞水口,胸口到喉嚨之間湧現一股熾熱。315Please respect copyright.PENANACxA86Y5NcL
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「哼。」315Please respect copyright.PENANA7q0LZCM7up
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剛才我是笑了?315Please respect copyright.PENANAxdAUbmQPJc
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這不好。久違了的感覺並不好!315Please respect copyright.PENANADBqviONbVP
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一把熟悉的聲音從我的頭頂傳來:315Please respect copyright.PENANAKBJC6chtw4
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「實驗失敗,真可惜。」315Please respect copyright.PENANAq0CqL2DOry
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我眼前的食物、桌子、座椅、半機械人、其他人、一切景物都扭曲成一團,突然腳下一空,失去重心,我要倒下去了。沒有盡頭,感覺一直往下掉。315Please respect copyright.PENANAddneMcAtvw
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四周一片空白,只有我的影子是黑色的。315Please respect copyright.PENANAYEr9b9MCwb
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