Mia
I breathe through the minor panic attack, my heart racing and my stomach ready to hurl. Curling into myself against the other side of the bathroom door, I hear Merida storm out of the room without a word.
It's impossible for me to understand this. There's way too much to grasp. From the shock at the fact that we're mated, to the surprise of Merida kissing me, to the heat I felt when she did, and to the painful crushing feeling when she told me how she felt about me as it all sunk in.
I always saw her as a sister.
But it seems she never felt the same.
How the hell would she expect me to react to that? Did she want me to just jump with joy at the fact that she never once considered me family? To be excited that she wanted to fuck me this whole time?
I run my fingers through my hair in frustration, ignoring the small tug at my heart.
It's too much. When Kristen told me about how relatives couldn't be mates, I thought that included relatives by marriage as well. Hell, our parents were mated to each other. Why the fuck would we be as well? 237Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhPdUG6zTeR
Shit. What am I supposed to do? I can't accept this. There's no way I can.
But there's also no way I can ignore the reality of what happened.
I can't get the truth of that kiss out of my head. Nor, for that matter, dispute it. And that included everything I'd been feeling for a long time.
It was warm. Not only that, but it was passionate and heated, and there was never a moment where I felt afraid of her or of the feelings between my wolf and hers.
But she moved so damn fast, I panicked. I run my hands over my face and bury myself into my drawn up knees as I remembered the look on her face when I punched her.
I inhale deeply trying to push down a strange feeling as I think about the pain and agony that she felt. The same emotions that moved into me at that moment. Like a tidal wave.
I think back to our conversation and everything starts to make sense. My ease around her, her protectiveness and my willingness to be protected.
Her feeding me and me eating whatever she cooked without question. Madness always listened to her, even if she was stubborn about it, she'd always listened to Merida.
"Fuckk..." I mutter to myself.
I need to focus. Sort this out one by one and move accordingly.
Let's see...
One—Merida and I are mates. I'm certain it's obvious by this point.
Two—I'm not happy with that fact. Who would be happy with the fact that their sister's their bonded partner.
Three— I'm not disgusted with the fact. Shocked, yes, but disgusted, no.
Four—there's no way in hell that I'll be screwing Merida any time soon, nor marrying her for that matter.
Five—nothing changes. At least, I hope it doesn't.
I cling to the last thought and I let it guide me. I can do this. I can hold a mate bond with Merida. It's possible, as long as we can just set some boundaries at least.
She told me that it'll be impossible to be friends. Hell by this point, it'll be impossible to remain sisters. But one thing is for certain, we might be able to still hold a mate bond without being intimate with each other. Or at least limit the intimacy.
Madness stirs, pushing at me with a feeling of vulnerability and I cave. Fine, we can limit the intimacy temporarily.
But one last thought remains.
Six—I have no idea how to be a mate.
Regardless, I can't let things stand as they are with us right now. I need to do something, say something to her.
I stand, breathing out with the determined resolve to find way to quell this. However, before I can reach to unlock the bathroom door, a sharp pain in my chest stills me.
The pain hits again, harder this time, making me hunch over. Within a second, the small pains in my chest cascade to the rest of my body. My flesh burns as I feel it tear and every bone in my body shatters. But when I look down at my arms, nothings there.
What is this?
Little by little, the agonizing torment builds until I can no longer take it.
I scream.
And scream again as I fall over, holding myself as the feeling continues to torture me.
Tears blur my vision as all the sounds around me are muffled by my own. This is agony, utter suffering.
I flinch as I feel hands touch me. They don't ease the pain and they're not warm. From this, I know the hands don't belong to Merida. I scream again as the pain amplifies ten-fold and the only thing I can think about... is how I need Merida.
"Mia, what's wrong?" Kristen's voice breaks through, but I can't speak. I can't bring myself to answer her.
"Kristen, what's going on?" Ma's calming voice causes me to tremble.
"I heard her screaming so I ripped off the bathroom door to get to her. And I found her like this."
"Mia, love. Mia. Speak to me. What's wrong?" Ma presses.
I fight through the pain to answer her the best I could. "I...don't know..."
"Peter, what's wrong with her?" Ma asks and it takes me a moment to register Peter's presence.
"Shit. I warned Merida." He mutters as another wave of pain shoots through me. "It's rejection."
"What?" Kristen and Ma say in unison.
"When a mate bond breaks or one wolf rejects another, the result is agonizing pain for both parties. Merida told Mia."
"Holy shit." I heard Kristen whisper.
"How.. do I make it... stop?" I asked to any one listening.
"It'll pass in a moment. But it won't completely end. When a bond breaks, the effects last until a new one is formed. It could take years, decades even." Peter answers.
I burst into an endless sob as the next wave of pain hits me. Years, this will go on for years.
"I didn't mean it." I cry. "I didn't."
"We know, love." Ma soothing voice calls out to me. "We know you didn't mean it. A mate bond is naturally fragile and tricky to navigate through if you're not careful."
"We need to find Merida. Until then, let's move her to the bed. Mia, is the pain starting to subside?" Peter asked.
I waited for a moment before nodding, terrified of the next wave of pain, terrified to even feel.
"Okay." Peter said, as I was gently lifted up.
I closed my eyes, afraid, as they laid me down on the bed and covered me with the blanket. I grabbed at the first arm I could. "Don't leave. Please, don't leave me." I begged.
"We won't leave you alone." Peter responded. "But we're going to need to bring Merida back here." The arm in my grasp moved as I forced myself to let it go. "Kristen, watch over her for right now."
"Yes, sir."
I begin to cry again as they left, something in me wanting to go out in search of Merida, but at the same time the fear of the pain kept me still.
I felt locked onto the thin sheets. Tethered to this ice cold bed. The thick covers blanketed me but they did nothing nothing to block the chill that seeped through.
"I got you." Kristen assured me. "It's going to be okay."
And as much as I wanted to trust the words of a friend, I couldn't bring myself to.
Simply, because she wasn't Merida.
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