For the first time in a month, I couldn't fall asleep. As I'd close my eyes and try to relax, my mind would start replaying my first paladin operation. The faces of the nighttimers, their fangs, and the most revolting part – their blood splashing in every direction. Then I remembered Luma. A small, haggard and scared creature trying to blend into a wall. Her skinny legs and her arms, just as skinny, wrapped around her knees. I've never seen so much horror in anyone's eyes.
I wanted to go check on Luma. It was well into the night and she hardly needed any visitors, but I thought there would be no harm if I just made sure she was okay. There were some muffled sounds coming from inside her room. I strained my ears. She was crying, sobbing quietly every couple of seconds. I knocked gently at her door and opened it. Luma was sitting on the edge of the bed with her legs stretched out in front of her. I wondered if she ever moved since I'd left.
"I… I thought you might want to see a friendly face."
The girl didn't so much as turn her head toward me. Tears were streaming down her cheeks. I made a step forward and paused again.
"You might not believe it, but one night, not too long ago, I was also sitting on a bed, crying… Actually, I was sitting on the floor next to the bed, but that's not the point… I don't know what happened to you, but I guess it was something terrible… I cannot even imagine how you ended up in this situation," I had to make a long pause after every sentence to think of something else to say. "But, trust me, I feel your pain. I had a best friend who saved my life. She was a vampire too… One day she attacked a group of guys… I tried to stop her…" I took a deep breath. "But in the end I kinda killed her… It was an accident, but still, she fell and... and died because of me."
Luma kept staring at the same spot on the opposite wall, and only her occasional sobbing reminded me that she was a living human being, not the most realistic mannequin in the world.
"I doubt that my story is in any way similar to yours, but I do know pain and loss. I can understand you… So… If you ever feel like sharing, I'm there to lend you an ear."
I ran out of words. Luma still hadn't looked at me. I was about to leave, but then again decided that she needed support more than solitude.
"You know what? Don't tell me anything. It's fine. You don't have to. I'll just sit around. I'll just sit right here."
I got down on the floor at her feet and rested my head on the bed. Luma remained silent. The time seemed to have stopped. I was sitting on the floor of her room in silence and almost in complete darkness. I was just staring at the same wall as she was and waiting. It was at least an hour later that she spoke.
"They came to our home…"
Her voice was soft and a little husky, probably because of all the crying.
"They… They killed everyone… My mom… My dad… My brother… They killed everyone and took me… They kept me on a chain and drank my blood… Six or seven days later they stuck a syringe in my chest and injected me with something black," from time to time her speech was interrupted by a sob. "It was so filthy, so disgusting… And it changed me… I became one of them… Just like those who killed my family… What do I do now? How can I keep on living?"
I didn't know what to answer to that, but I knew I had to answer something. And all those clichés like, "It's all gonna be fine" and "You need to move on with your life" were not going to work. And then I thought I knew what she wanted to hear.
"We killed them. We killed them all. Everyone who was in that house and did this to you. They are all dead now."
There came a long pause.
"Good. I hope their death was slow and painful."
Another pause.
"That woman told me you are not like them. You don't drink human blood and kill those who do. Is it true?"
"Yes. We protect people from vampires… I'm really sorry… I'm sorry we couldn't save your family."
I turned my head and looked at Luma. She was biting her lower lip anxiously but she stopped crying.
"And what's next? What happens to me now?" she asked.
"Whatever you want. We'll help you. We can help you get your life back if you want to. If not, we can give you a new life, any life you want."
"What if I want to die?"
I paused to think. Those monsters murdered her entire family in front of her, kept her chained up for God knows how long, drank her blood and then turned her into one of them. Something like that is bound to have lasting consequences. And it's hardly the case for a shrink and a truckful of Prozac. What if that nightmare never goes away? What if every day of her life will be torture just like the day before?
"I'll help you with that. But I need you to give me some time. One month. If I fail to relieve at least some of your pain, I'll help you end it all."
She nodded.
"It's been so long since I actually lay on a bed… I should try to sleep," she said.
"That's a good idea," I started to get up.
"Could you… Could you sit around for a bit? It makes me feel better."
"Sure, for as long as you like."
I slumped back on the floor.
"Thanks… Sam."
But Luma couldn’t fall asleep. So I stayed on the floor at her bed the entire night. We talked. About me, about her, about life, about our favorite movies and books… About everything except for what happened to her. It turned out, Luma was two years older than me, just as I thought. She was studying international relations at Brown. Her father was originally from Germany, and her mother came to the US from Brazil, the same as her daughter's exotic name. Apart from English, Luma was fluent in German and Portuguese. She had a younger brother Aiden, a Pomeranian named Harlow, and big plans for the future.
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