After the 'fetish' incident which was of course denied vehemently by Grey, Lilac found herself unexpectedly hanging out with not only him but also his friends. That also meant Joanne had to constantly remember to refrain herself from throwing scathing remarks to her ex out of the blue…not that it was a success.
Lilac got the whole scoop about their relationship a couple of days later and apparently the reason for Joanne and Henry's break up was because he cheated on her with her best friend at the time. Yeah, it was quite cliché but nevertheless a very dick thing to do on his part.
Joanne did not deserved that and now it made Lilac want to kick his ass.
"That son of a gun! I can't believe you went through that terrible thing, Jo! No one deserves that, especially you." A very heated Lilac said to a surprisingly calm Joanne one evening.
Joanne had put a hand on Lilac's shoulder, and though she wanted to roll her eyes in exasperation at her friend's antics, she looked her in the eye instead, saying, "Okay, as much as I'm touched that you're volunteering to kick his ass, it's alright now. Besides, he already paid his due."
Lilac stared at her for a moment before nodding in satisfaction. She wasn't one to succumb to violence, in fact, rarely so as she was more of a pacifist. However, there was a short temper to her and anyone who messes with her loved ones would rarely be left unscathed. An overprotective nature was what she had when one had to care for three younger siblings.
Sure, they were of the same age but the two of them had been close friends since freshman year. There was a bond between them that wouldn't be easy to break and she was proud of Joanne in standing up for herself.
Then, a mischievous glint reflected in her eyes and Joanne looked at her in wary - she knew that look, of course.
"What are you up to?"
Lilac shrugged daintily before looking at her friend innocently. "Oh, nothing, just…do you happen to know where your ex-best friend is? I'd like to pay her a visit."
"Oh my God, please just drop it." Joanne looked at her in exasperation.
"Okay, I was kidding."
Joanne threw Lilac a look.
"Maybe a little."
So that was how their conversation went. Although now she was a bit cautious around Henry, she got well with every one of them.
Especially Grey.
Lilac couldn't believe she didn't notice him in her band class. Apparently, he had been joining ever since sophomore year where he played the keyboard. Again, the knowledge escaped her when she thought of how she had never noticed him before; he was probably the tallest guy around with a lean, though not too twiggy physique. And he had the most easygoing vibe about him, with that lopsided grin of his and his twinkling brown eyes whenever he found something amusing.
Then again, it would make sense to her that she wasn't that observant when it came to that. Considering how she only played the cymbals and her role had been nothing but to clap the thin alloy plates at the appropriate time, Lilac wasn't too enthusiastic about the class she was reluctant to take for her grade.
That, and she only went for it whenever her role was needed which was almost never at her school – except for some school games or event.
Despite that, part of her felt like she should feel important for being in it. After all, her roles are what helped made their little orchestra complete.
But she digressed.
For the past few weeks, Lilac found that not only was he in her band class, but that he also liked the same bands she does from the heavy genre to the chilliest tunes down to their cereals. It felt weird but pleasant at the same time. When she first found out that another person also shared the same common interest she had, Lilac thought her heart was going to burst in elation. After all, could all of this simply be a coincidence or fate?
Maybe it was a coincidence that they met at the gig almost a month ago but surely fate had brought them together again, was her theory. Still, that hardly matter now because Lilac was glad she met him, even though their first meeting was quite rocky.
Despite all the things they shared in common, there were also some where they've had disagreements about.
Lilac and Grey were sitting on the bleachers, the very same place where they met for the second time. He laid down on the cool bench before propping up on an elbow and looked at her.
"I don't get why people are so crazy about Ragnarok. You know, the new Thor movie?" He drawled and watched the cloudy sky rolling in.
Unbeknownst to him, she knew that movie very well. In fact, she was one of those people who was crazy about it.
Lilac felt her shackles slowly rise up and tried to calm herself down before she start throwing verbal punches. That was really something she needed to work on because it was beginning to irate her. If she got offended for every single thing she liked, she might as well be a recluse.
"Of course I do. That's one of the best film ever made." She attempted to smile at him before throwing a 'duh' look. Grey stared at her for a moment before he made a sound of recognition.
"Ah. You're one of them." A calm statement.
Indifferent and trying to look the part, she answered, "That's not a bad thing."
Somehow she knew that came out defensive.
Grey's lips twitched. "Of course. But I presume you're quite offended with what I said?"
Looking at his grinning face and challenging eyes, as if daring her to deny it, Lilac decided to hell with being composed and let her irritation show. "You presume correct."
He rolled his eyes then. "Geez, Lilac there's no reason for it. That's just my opinion."
"Well, your opinion suck." She stuck a tongue out at him before adding with a shrug, "I don't get how you aren't crazy about it. I mean, you have to admit that it's fun to see Loki being so unlike him and funny!"
He shrugged. "I don't really think it's worth the hype."
She rolled her eyes at him and turned away. "You're impossible."
He grinned and proceeded to pinch her cheeks. "Aw, you're so cute when you're being all mopey like that!"
She swatted his hands away and grumbled, "You're so childish!"
He gave a short laugh and looked at her. "Says the girl who just turned away with a pout." He prodded a finger to her waist, not knowing that she was ticklish especially at her waist.
Lilac squealed and jumped away from him, looking at the now slightly open jawed boy. He closed his mouth and a smirk curled at his lips.
Lilac knew she was going to be in trouble.
"Grey, don't even think about it." She warned, trying to glare at him at the same time.
"Or what?" He taunted, advancing closer as she tried to make her way up on the bleachers.
"Or I'll soccer kick you to the moon." She finished with an angry huff and stood her ground.
Grey stared at her for a moment, his tawny eyes twinkling mischievously despite her threats. Finally, he nodded and said, "Pretty ambitious but I get your point." before stepping down.
"About damn time," she muttered to herself.
Lilac breathed a sigh of relief when she was certain that Grey wasn't up to anything when he backed down and took his previous seat. She sat down from her spot, leaving a gap between Grey and her as no one spoke for a moment. She started to feel uneasy when he kept looking at her like he knew something she didn't.
"What?"
He laughed a little and shook his head. "Nothing."
"Oh, come on. Is there something you're not telling me? I hate being left in the dark." She tried to coax him.
"It's still daylight."
"Smartass." She muttered but she had a small smile on her face. "You can't just make me curious and not tell me, Grey."
He chuckled and looked out at the field. Lilac studied his now pensive face before following his gaze. A group of footballers were practicing in the middle of the field with some cheerleaders cheering by the sidelines. There was also a couple sitting under a huge shaded tree at a distance from where she was.
Suddenly, he spoke up, his voice quiet and sounding far even though he was near her. "Do you believe in fate?"
Lilac blinked and stared at his back. The wind picked up on the breeze, making her hair fly around her in disarray. Grumbling under her breath at the stormy wind, she swept her hair back and tried to tie it with a hairband on her wrist.
In doing so, she pondered on his words. Fate? That was definitely out of the blue. She didn't know if she believed in it, but Lilac had to admit she was fully intrigued at the idea of it. After all, how does that explained the fact that she met him twice and now they're friends? The universe sure worked in mysterious way sometimes, she thought to herself.
Remembering his question, she said, "I don't know about that… but I think it exists out there. Whatever you call it, fate, destiny…I think it's a part of how the world works." Then, she laughed softly. "Fascinating, isn't it?"
He glanced at her, a soft expression on his face. It was something she had never seen on his face before and that startled her. "Yeah, it is."
She felt it no sooner after he said those words.
Someone might as well have punched her in the gut because she suddenly felt her breath hitched in her throat.
And it wasn't until later that day did she finally realized why.
"Well, I'll be damn." Lilac punched the soft pillow on her lap and muttered that for the umpteenth time that night.
She was sitting by the window pane, trying to make sense of the things that was whirling in her mind. The moon was bright and she couldn't seemed to stop admiring how it shined brighter the longer she stared, brighter than the glittering stars that suddenly decided to grace the night sky. It certainly did not mirror the turbulent thoughts and feelings within her.
Lilac hugged the soft pillow to her chest and sighed deeply.
What the hell, really, she thought with a grumpy sigh. It can't be…
Still, there was no mistaking of what she felt.
But why? Why him? Why now? Her subconscious mind yelled in confusion.
Lilac was no fool.
After watching countless of chick flicks with Joanne and having had to endure the romantic talks with her friends about their boyfriends and crushes, she knew the tell-tale signs of developing one.
Lilac had spent hours after hanging out on the field with him pondering about the newfound realization and she was sure things are starting to change between them with every seconds that ticked by.
Or maybe it already had.
But when? How?
...
Okay, calm down. There's really no point of wondering the 'when' and 'where' in this when it already happened. The question now, is how the heck do you deal with this?
"…Good point, my rational brain." Lilac muttered to herself, smoothing her furrowed brows.
She also remembered how she just bolted out of court as soon he said those words and her realizing her feelings at the same time.
"Yeah, it is." Grey smiled.
With his thick wavy locks windswept by the wind, and that soft expression directed at her that was beginning to bother her conscience, Lilac thought she heard a soft whisper echoed in her heart and mind.
'Lilac, you're fucked now.'
"Uhh…" she started, heart thumping faster as she felt herself sweat. She rubbed her palms against her jeans, her eyes wide with a star struck realization.
Confused, he got up and started to move towards her. "Lilac? What's wrong?"
No! Stay where you are, she wanted to say.
Certain she would make a fool out of herself right then and there, she grabbed her school bag, sling it on her shoulder and started to bolt. "I've got to go." She muttered.
"Is it that time of the month, again?" She heard him yelled in confusion behind her. She also heard the concern in his voice.
If Lilac wasn't dealing with an important epiphany right then, she would have chuckled and appreciate how he'd always put forth others ahead of him, even if the matter was something that most guys would feel uncomfortable about.
She had never known a guy to approach that topic without care like he did. Most of her guy friends in middle school would run at the first word of tampon but apparently Grey was different from that.
Lilac realized now that that was one of the things she liked about him. His caring demeanor, his humour and genuine show of interest, his attentiveness…
She shook the thoughts out and rest her head against the wall, staring forlornly at the ceiling.
She sighed loudly and hit her head with every word she enunciated. "I'm an idiot. Knowing him, he's probably gonna get all weird over me. Way to go to run away and make it complicated. Idiot. A complete, helpless – "
"Idiot?" a slightly muffled voice said.
Lilac snapped her attention to a dark figure pressing their face against her window, making their cheeks, nose and lips mushed.
Caught off guard, she screamed and fell of the seat, scrambling to get away from the window.
Joanne gave her a sheepish grin and knock on the window twice, motioning for her to open it.
A hand stilling on her chest, Lilac tried to get her bearings and breathing under control, and when she managed it, she glared at her best friend.
"JOANNE LEE! What the fuck did you think you were doing out there?" Lilac yelled, still scared out of her wits.
Joanne clasped her hands together in a praying gesture, apologizing to her. Loud enough for her to hear, though it was still muffled, she said, "Sorry, I called your phone but you didn't pick up. I tried the house too but no one answered."
She deadpanned. "So you decided to scale my balcony?"
"I feel like Romeo, eh heh." Joanne made a gesture of swiping her bangs to the side and grinned at Lilac.
"Focus!" Lilac snapped.
Joanne put her hands on her waist and whined. "Let me in first!"
She took a deep breath and exhaled, pinching the bridge of her nose before walking over and unscrewed the lock to let her in.
Joanne fell with a thud and she spread her arms open like she was making angel wings, groaning quietly. "Ah, so nice."
"You're scratching your back against my carpet, aren't you?" Lilac's tone was flat as she watched Joanne. She would have chuckled at the content look on Joanne's face if she weren't curious and a little angry at her.
Joanne got up and sat on the bed. "Can't resist." Then, she plopped on her stomach, cupping her face in her hands and looked at a glowering Lilac. "I got your text. So, what's the emergency?"
By the look of Lilac's confused expression, Joanne sighed and said, "You texted me around four earlier with nothing but capital words saying emergency. I really couldn't get out of babysitting then but I'm here now. So, what's the problem, best friend?"
Lilac mulled over Joanne's words and checked her phone. 4 p.m.… message? Ah, yes.
She had indeed texted Joanne then and that was when she high tailed out of the basketball court and rushed home…to where she had been wearing her carpet off and pondering about her issue by the window pane.
"Right." She laughed weakly and took a seat by the window. "Sorry about that."
Joanne pursed her lips and raised an eyebrow at her. "Well? Not that I can hear you much against the window but you were saying it out loud and who is this 'he' you're talking about?" She made quotations with her fingers. Then, as quick as the bemused expression on her face, a sly grin made its way to her lips. "Hmm…boy trouble?"
Damn her, but she blushed at that.
Joanne gasped. "No way! Who?"
Lilac hesitated for a moment. For someone who had come to terms with it, her denial was still pretty strong.
Taking a deep breath, she nodded her head and stood in front of Joanne. With her hands wringing restlessly, she started, "Um, okay. So he's actually someone we know - "
Joanne wouldn't wait to hear the rest as she looked at Lilac excitedly and interjected, "It's Grey, isn't it?"
Anxiety forgotten, Lilac threw her hands up in exasperation. "Hello? I'm trying to muster some courage here! Couldn't you just be patient?" She glared.
Joanne took that as an affirmation and giddy with that, she giggled. "Sorry! I'm just so excited-"
"I can tell." Lilac deadpanned.
"- because this hasn't happen since sophomore year! I mean, c'mon. You're never one to have heart to heart conversation about this. The last time you had a small crush on a guy, I had to take away your band shirts for you to even tell me you had a crush. And even that, you didn't tell me his name!"
…She couldn't argue with that. Lilac did have a tightlipped mouth, sometimes.
But in her defense, she preferred to share information when she have to.
Really have to.
She looked at her indifferently. "Speaking of which, I can't believe you hid my band stuffs away. You know they're sacred to me."
"Precisely why." Joanne waggled her eyebrows and grinned.
Evil.
Then, she rolled her eyes and sighed. "Whatever. Do you wanna hear this or not?" Lilac gave Joanne an annoyed look.
She could have sworn Joanne had a glint in her eyes when the girl rubbed her palms together and whispered with a grin, "Oh, yes. Do tell me."
And so she did.
After a while, Joanne whistled. "Wow."
They were both on Lilac's bed, legs against the headboard as they laid beside each other.
"Yeah." Lilac dragged the word out in a long sigh.
"So…what do you plan to do about this?" Joanne started, looking at the ceiling.
Lilac shook her head, a troubled expression on her face. "I don't know. I mean, it's too soon, don't you think? All of a sudden, I realized I have a crush on him? That's crazy."
"Not really. What could be called crazy was," Joanne propped up on her elbow and faced Lilac, grinning. "Walking up to one of the delinquent looking kids at a school playground with a bottle of glitter in my hands, before dumping it on his hair."
Lilac turned to stare wide-eyed at Joanne. "You actually did that? What were you in, a kindergarten?" She said in a disapproving tone.
Joanne turned sheepish and mumbled, "Middle school. I just wanted to see how it would sparkle. Though I could admit the truth now that I did that 'cause I liked him. And I even demanded him to be my boyfriend! I was quite the horrible runt, actually."
"Why do you sound so proud of it?" Lilac muttered as she narrowed her eyes at Joanne. She couldn't believe nor imagine that Joanne, the friendly and nice girl, would actually do that to someone. Still, this happened way before she knew her. "You couldn't just ask him out like normal people would?"
"Hey, my people skills were pretty bad back then, okay?" Joanne shot back.
Lilac shook her head at her in disappointment. Still curious and a bit awed, she said, "So, what happened then?"
Joanne shrugged. "A fight broke out. We got some detention but he must have thought I was cool or something 'cause he said yes."
As she mulled about it, Lilac's expression grew with suspicion as a thought dawned on her. "Wait…was he Henry?"
Joanne grinned. "He was."
Chuckling, Lilac shook her head before she raised an eyebrow. "Is there a moral to this story?"
Joanne blinked. "I didn't think of it when I tell you that. But, I suppose every story has one." She bit her lip and concentrated.
Lilac's lips twitched even though her expression maintained neutral.
Joanne shrugged. "Well, just don't do what I did. Y'know, throw glitter on him or something." Then, she shook her head and looked at Lilac apologetically. "Look, forget that. Thing is, you don't have to think too far about it. If you like him, you tell him."
Lilac frowned. "It's not as easy as it sounds, Jo. It could ruin our friendship!"
Joanne patted Lilac's arm. "But it could also turn into something better."
She sat up and pulled Lilac to a sitting position, so now they were facing each other. "Listen, are you sure you're not just reading into what you feel for him? Do you really like him or is he just like your other crushes? You know, does your heart beat wildly whenever you see him? Forget the butterflies, do you feel like you're swimming in a pool of tornado? What is it about him that you like? When it comes down to it, are you really willing to put your friendship on the line and be okay with what comes after, you know, assuming he doesn't feel the same way?"
Lilac wanted to say something but thought otherwise. The truth was, she had thought of it all for the hours she paced in her room earlier. But hearing Joanne asking her this, out loud, was starting to make her doubt herself.
"Don't pressure yourself into thinking you'll have to act on it now. Maybe you're still confused. Maybe you need more time to think about it." Joanne studied Lilac for a long while, the both of them silent in Lilac's room.
Then, in a quiet voice, Joanne asked, "Do you think he might feel the same way you do?"
Lilac met Joanne's gaze and grinned, though there was no humour in it. "I don't know…I don't think so, actually. I mean, what are the odds? Me liking him and suddenly it's mutual? Some things doesn't work like that."
Joanne squeezed Lilac's hand and smiled. "You never know, babe. Maybe it'll work for you. Trust the universe."
The universe. She wanted to laugh because wasn't just hours ago she had thought about it? How they work mysteriously...
Lilac wanted desperately to believe that everything would be alright, but that would be utterly naive of her.
She shook her head. "This is so not up my alley. I've never given so much thought over a guy before. What do I do, Jo?" Lilac asked helplessly.
With a soft grin on her face, she said, "Just be yourself, Lilac."
ns 18.68.41.177da2
