By the time l leave my mother's house, it is dark. The only source of light is the moon, along with the occasional street light along a the sidewalk. It is so dark, that initially, I don't see Kwamé waiting for me outside.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFJkMUeods7
I am both elated and disappointed to see Kwamé standing outside of my apartment; elated because he's there, and disappointed because he is a bull again. I guess I was hoping to see him as a human more than I realised. My emotions must show on my face, because when he sees me, he hangs his head, his pointy horns in full view.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO8AypBc9ER
"You must have known that this was coming, Nya," he grunts, raising his head again. When I look into his beady eyes, I can see what my mother was talking about — he wants to be my friend. He wants to have someone to trust, but he's just too damn stubborn to let anybody in.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWRH4oL6b5U
"I can't say that I'm surprised," I mumble with a grin that feels painfully plastic on my face. Shaking my head, I move my mind out of the spiral of depression that it currently resides in, and plant a seed of optimism. "We still have to go to the children's home and read to them," I remind him ever so gently. He simply grunts in response, so I continue. "I mean, it's not as if you can go there as a bull."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtUzWnRyN8e
As soon as the words leave my mouth, he looks up at me; the look he gives me says it all. It tells a story of a tortured soul, of untold pain, of a person who can't bear to exist with themselves, bet doesn't really have a choice — and I say "exist" because he isn't alive, not really. Who said that death brought peace? It's been over three hundred years, and he still hasn't found his. 645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4eU6qUjEEL
That look... is the look of someone in fear.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡITieT8Ijnl
"You have to come," I insist. For once, I don't have to ask what he's afraid of. He's scared that the children will see in him what he sees — a monster. 645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs9vbz4kZMy
"I can't be around children, Nya," he insists, shaking his head and grinding his hooves into the ground. "I've thought it over... and I can't." He actually sounds sad, as if he wanted to go. 645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡswLke6YXf4
"No one sees that, you know," I tell him assertively. He has to know that. He has to know that he's not what he thinks he is. "No one sees a monster." His eyes come up to meet mine again, and when they do, I can swear I see tears in them. Only for a second, though, because then they turn to fire. I jump back in fright.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdEdtUf5Ma6
"Tell me what you see," he insists.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7rmJw6D41K
"Stop it, you idiot!" I hiss, quickly scanning the area before looking back at him. "What if someone sees you?" 645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK6vv0s9Hfx
"What will they see? A monster?" he snarls at me, stepping forward, and since he is so huge, his face is eye-level with mine. 645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp8pded3DQn
He's hurting, and he wants to push me away. Even though I barely know him, I'm not heartless. I want to help him. I won't let him.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP7RIgdQFd5
Sighing gently, I lean my forehead against his warm, fur-covered one. The moment our foreheads meet, the orange light from the fires in his eyes go out. Arguing with him is exhausting, and I hate it. In the silence I hear the crickets chirping, and the television playing in my neighbour's house, but it can't distract me; it is only background to the moment that I am sharing with him.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGyNn30sfgb
"It's what's on the inside that counts," I tell him as I bring my hand to his face, rubbing his cheek. My heart splinters all over the floor when I realise that it's wet, that he's crying. I don't want to see him cry. Knowing the kind of person that he is, he probably doesn't want me to comfort him, probably doesn't think that he disserves it, so I'm at a complete loss as to what to do.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ4PMWcm1cG
"You're the only person who I've ever considered as a friend," I tell him. I decide to go with honesty. That can't hurt. Honesty is always best. "I must see something in you. You're really not as bad as you think."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAXgnXJml2M
"Don't," he sniffles. "Don't do that to me."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg2wQiuuuyG
"I'm being honest," I insist, pulling back to look him in the face. "I don't like people, but I like you."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKiyjhwISff
In the darkness, I see him wrinkle his nose, sniffling a bit. Even on his inhuman face, I can see the pain in his expression. 645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnxW8hucZgM
"I should go," he mumbles, hanging his head again. I feel a pang of disappointment, as well as guilt, because I know that he's doing this because I pressed the issue; he's avoiding me.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4s9aiG7SJk
"I'm sorry," I apologise quickly, hoping that it will change his mind, but I know that it's too late; he needs some space.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡngMcH7NKDV
"It's okay, you know," he assures me. I can see a tiny smile on his face. "You don't need to feel guilty. I just need some space. Please."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq8tKSyijXs
I have to respect that. Even though I don't want him wallowing in his self-hatred, I understand his need to be alone.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5M3dodVq6x
"I understand." My voice is depressingly hopeless. He looks at me with pity in his eyes. Even as he is in pain, he is pitying me. "Take as long as you need." My voice doesn't even sound believable to my own ears. I can't help it; apart from Silver, he's all I have.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsdVCk8Olwf
He just nods, but he looks as if he doesn't really want to leave. He slowly turns around, and walks away from me, reluctance in every step, his entire body hunched over. He looks so... broken. I feel so frustrated because I want to help. Strange for me, because I've never felt the desire to really help anyone before. 645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIeE4ug6pYy
After he walks off, I do not immediately go inside. I just stand there, as if waiting for him to come back. I want him to. I guess a part of me is hoping and waiting for that, although I know that he won't. 645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHEoNYRNLHV
I could stand there all night — if it's not for the biting wind that hits me, whipping against my skin. Reluctantly, I go inside and close the door behind me.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMdOd64Q7hE
***645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAzyqhesa7G
Two days have past since I last saw Kwamé. I think that part of the reason why he might be avoiding me, is because of the fact that he faces some uncomfortable topics when he is around me. Additionally, he probably thinks that I deserve better friends.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrE36bu0pv0
Utter rubbish.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKdCfi9eYlX
I've waited for him to come around, but I guess that I'm more impatient than I thought. That's probably why I've found myself here, outside of Akatua's door at two minutes past twelve, the heat causing my yellow cotton blouse to stick to my sweat covered skin. I only have to knock three times before I hear the telltale noises from inside the house, indicating that she is on her way.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY8hHCNUR7U
"Nya," she greets with a smile, her flower themed sundress bellowing as a sudden gust of wind rushes into the house.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLg5zEO38qw
"Have you seen Kwamé?" The desperation colours my voice. Usually I'm not this rude, and I've never been this desperate for anyone , but my pride is officially gone with the wind.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyXZLyuWkRY
Her smile falls, giving me my answer — the answer that I don't want.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYzw3FjF6T2
"No. I haven't seen him since the other night."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0CF0XK16Ij
"Okay." My reply is that of a broken soul. My mood is now crushed, all hope gone, not that there was much to begin with. I turn to leave, but she stops me by calling my name.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcHjG7zJFm1
"Yes?" I ask.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRJMovjLV3A
She bites her lip and fumbles with her fingers a little bit, looking at the floor. It's clear to me that she's uncomfortable. "I was actually going to come over to your house." She chuckles nervously, drawing patterns on the ground with her foot.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLGiFbYgyJw
"And why would you do that?" My interest is piqued. She knows that I am hesitant in my relations with her, so whatever she was coming over to discuss with me could not have been trivial.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuT2rR8zfJw
She rolls her shoulders, as if preparing herself for a big moment. 645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPF7dymVVKQ
"I was going to tell you the truth about why I left you in that orphanage."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrvnXYns5ea
I am completely flabbergasted. Whatever I was expecting... it definitely was not that. The strange thing, most peculiar about this situation, is that I've been waiting for this moment for so long, but now that it's here, I'm not quite so sure that I'm ready to hear the truth.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNXLqRNgosx
"Come inside," she insists, stepping to the side to let me into the room.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKWDqAQJeEH
I eye the interior with uncertainty and discomfort. Deep down, though, is the knowledge that this will have to happen at some point. With a certain degree of reluctance, my feet take me into the house.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg0hn4ouW0b
***645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0XyuZgq1Ju
We sit latitudinally across the rectangular, wooden table from each other, a cup of coffee between each of our hands. The caffeine has given me an extra zing of energy. 645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJEdcUWE6A8
"I don't know where to start." Her words are barely audible, just above a whisper, but I hear them clearly.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtzYX4KdrgL
"From the beginning. Who was this River Mumma and what business did you have with her?"645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnrwGWWiAZH
Her fingers tap a nervous beat on the side of her coffee cup. "It's a strange story, but please bear with me."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUJl8Ydzvgj
I nod in assertion.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0ugQVY2Z6i
"Okay." She released a nervous breath. "It was many, many years ago, when I made a deal with her," she begins. "Her name is Lu'lu, a descendant of the West African spirits, now known as Mami Wata. When the slaves came over, some of them came over too, but the island changed them, made them more vicious. The rivers here are smaller, more uncomfortable for them. Additionally, they had to watch the people they came to care about go through some horrible things. They became apathetic, even hateful, to cope with it.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡilsWPMgzun
"This one girl, Lu'lu... we made a deal. I'd give up my first born child in exchange for her help. I agreed because, of course, I had no intention of having a child. Never wanted one. What she didn't tell me was that she intended to get that child whether or not I was willing." She gulps, and I know that whatever she tells me next won't be fun. "She had someone put a tonic in my drink... a tonic that would cause me to clone."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJxdjCNrtK3
At first, I think that I'm hearing wrong, because she just told me that she cloned to form me. I'm her clone.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWzIzh9joes
"What?" My tone is one of incredulity.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4tW7Gqir0B
"I became pregnant with someone who was genetically identical to myself."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlCBPpnWOa3
I try to think of something, anything to refute her argument. She can't be right. This has to be a joke.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTYsjHhqAa7
"We don't look the same," I point out. "If you were my clone, we'd be identical. We look similar, but not identical."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDMzj1iWGj6
She gazes to the side and places her coffee mug on the table, as if trying to think about how to express her thoughts. 645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ97CVn4D3Wi
"One day, we will."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh8rSeFdBL0
I take a long drink from my coffee. This is a lot to absorb, not just for myself, but for anyone. I'm past not believing things anymore; I accept that there are weird things out there. However, just because I'm capable of believing it doesn't mean that it's not overwhelming me.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKg0oBt8CgC
"So when I found out that I was pregnant," she continues, "I tried to save you from a live of misery, of slavery. I tried to abort you." She whispers the last part, and I can tell that she's worried about offending me. I'm not offended, though. Were I in her position, I would have probably done the same thing. Scratch that, I would have definitely done the same thing.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ68WQ1oekzb
"But you... you wouldn't die." Her voice wavers slightly, and for a second, I think that she might cry. "I tried everything. The spells and tonics wouldn't work, and when I turned to other methods... I wouldn't die, either." She takes a deep breath, and I feel tears well up in my eyes. What is that I'm feeling? Guilt. How could I have ever judged her?645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOP8YCrTkN4
"I was about to cut you out when Kwamé walked in on me. He'd heard me crying and came to check on me... convinced me not to... He told me that he'd help me to hide you. He told me that he knew that you'd be special." She smiled at me, and this time it's a real smile — bitter-sweet, but genuine. "And here we are."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFiRRQxXuvn
I can't help but smile back at her.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg2KYCLJj2M
"Yes," I answer, setting the mug down on the table. "Here we are." I can finally do something that I wasn't able to do before: I can forgive her. I realise that I never really did.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdMuwutK9pt
My mind sorts through a lot of things. Of course, one of them is Kwamé. So Kwamé knew me before I was born? More importantly, he saved me from this Lu'lu? How could he think that he's a bad person? Kwamé aside, something else comes to me. 645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCm2YL1DHHs
"Tell me something," I begin, leaning forward, a small, but important detail that has been overlooked suddenly jumping out at me. "What was the deal that you made with this woman?"645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr9SFSdQyEM
"Uh... It's kinda hard to explain." I raise one brow, and she sighs. "I was fighting a great evil at the time, and in order to do so, I had to make myself more... durable. She helped me."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuJ5JN5VxjG
"How?"645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXppnlIAJdq
"She let me drink her blood," she deadpans. 645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGUs4mP6hBJ
Well, that leaves me speechless. I really need to mentally prepare myself for these things. Note to self: when Akatua starts to act oddly, or says something like "it's hard to explain", know that she's going to say some really weird, possibly gross shit.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv5OWomGdJH
"So..." I begin, not quite recovered from what she just said, "what does that do?"645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡom8ZqNZo9b
As nonchalantly as ever, she says, "it makes you immortal."645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbn53qIIh7u
What?645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs47fs4GcAT
"Huh?" I grunt, sounding like a cave woman.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhkgVu7WVl6
She picks up her mug and takes a slow sip from it. She then takes her time to put it back down. As if I'm not here. As if I'm not waiting for answers. Placing it down, and licking her lips, she clears her throat.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7olhxubEtG
"I'm immortal, Nya," she tells me, staring determinedly at the space above my head. A long, deafening silence follows her statement — but not as deafening as her next words.645Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWvtf8UXoB7
"And you are, too."
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