By the time l leave my mother's house, it is dark. The only source of light is the moon, along with the occasional street light along a the sidewalk. It is so dark, that initially, I don't see Kwamé waiting for me outside.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjh0Ro5LMCB
I am both elated and disappointed to see Kwamé standing outside of my apartment; elated because he's there, and disappointed because he is a bull again. I guess I was hoping to see him as a human more than I realised. My emotions must show on my face, because when he sees me, he hangs his head, his pointy horns in full view.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDtMMnjlmhY
"You must have known that this was coming, Nya," he grunts, raising his head again. When I look into his beady eyes, I can see what my mother was talking about — he wants to be my friend. He wants to have someone to trust, but he's just too damn stubborn to let anybody in.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnHxT5JwTPa
"I can't say that I'm surprised," I mumble with a grin that feels painfully plastic on my face. Shaking my head, I move my mind out of the spiral of depression that it currently resides in, and plant a seed of optimism. "We still have to go to the children's home and read to them," I remind him ever so gently. He simply grunts in response, so I continue. "I mean, it's not as if you can go there as a bull."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPrAToOJnay
As soon as the words leave my mouth, he looks up at me; the look he gives me says it all. It tells a story of a tortured soul, of untold pain, of a person who can't bear to exist with themselves, bet doesn't really have a choice — and I say "exist" because he isn't alive, not really. Who said that death brought peace? It's been over three hundred years, and he still hasn't found his. 653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvm6LMDLQGN
That look... is the look of someone in fear.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTwkPr6QUpv
"You have to come," I insist. For once, I don't have to ask what he's afraid of. He's scared that the children will see in him what he sees — a monster. 653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwsDcLqfyAG
"I can't be around children, Nya," he insists, shaking his head and grinding his hooves into the ground. "I've thought it over... and I can't." He actually sounds sad, as if he wanted to go. 653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYnFdKmSoHV
"No one sees that, you know," I tell him assertively. He has to know that. He has to know that he's not what he thinks he is. "No one sees a monster." His eyes come up to meet mine again, and when they do, I can swear I see tears in them. Only for a second, though, because then they turn to fire. I jump back in fright.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhBtKR0X38o
"Tell me what you see," he insists.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRsWojF8z6O
"Stop it, you idiot!" I hiss, quickly scanning the area before looking back at him. "What if someone sees you?" 653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUNHWspFbfT
"What will they see? A monster?" he snarls at me, stepping forward, and since he is so huge, his face is eye-level with mine. 653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4qmhEQcdwB
He's hurting, and he wants to push me away. Even though I barely know him, I'm not heartless. I want to help him. I won't let him.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmOH7NyBwj9
Sighing gently, I lean my forehead against his warm, fur-covered one. The moment our foreheads meet, the orange light from the fires in his eyes go out. Arguing with him is exhausting, and I hate it. In the silence I hear the crickets chirping, and the television playing in my neighbour's house, but it can't distract me; it is only background to the moment that I am sharing with him.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs2Q82cHs5n
"It's what's on the inside that counts," I tell him as I bring my hand to his face, rubbing his cheek. My heart splinters all over the floor when I realise that it's wet, that he's crying. I don't want to see him cry. Knowing the kind of person that he is, he probably doesn't want me to comfort him, probably doesn't think that he disserves it, so I'm at a complete loss as to what to do.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFXyxB64I3p
"You're the only person who I've ever considered as a friend," I tell him. I decide to go with honesty. That can't hurt. Honesty is always best. "I must see something in you. You're really not as bad as you think."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0RILvJIFnJ
"Don't," he sniffles. "Don't do that to me."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYVDfgKTMTN
"I'm being honest," I insist, pulling back to look him in the face. "I don't like people, but I like you."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyL5tpCKUdd
In the darkness, I see him wrinkle his nose, sniffling a bit. Even on his inhuman face, I can see the pain in his expression. 653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLZ2ojmxd2D
"I should go," he mumbles, hanging his head again. I feel a pang of disappointment, as well as guilt, because I know that he's doing this because I pressed the issue; he's avoiding me.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4sV8MwdsRS
"I'm sorry," I apologise quickly, hoping that it will change his mind, but I know that it's too late; he needs some space.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkLrA8Diaqq
"It's okay, you know," he assures me. I can see a tiny smile on his face. "You don't need to feel guilty. I just need some space. Please."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI7fEzNw8kn
I have to respect that. Even though I don't want him wallowing in his self-hatred, I understand his need to be alone.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHpZlNDgVa6
"I understand." My voice is depressingly hopeless. He looks at me with pity in his eyes. Even as he is in pain, he is pitying me. "Take as long as you need." My voice doesn't even sound believable to my own ears. I can't help it; apart from Silver, he's all I have.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUGfS458ZU0
He just nods, but he looks as if he doesn't really want to leave. He slowly turns around, and walks away from me, reluctance in every step, his entire body hunched over. He looks so... broken. I feel so frustrated because I want to help. Strange for me, because I've never felt the desire to really help anyone before. 653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjSkNBO87Av
After he walks off, I do not immediately go inside. I just stand there, as if waiting for him to come back. I want him to. I guess a part of me is hoping and waiting for that, although I know that he won't. 653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQobVwE7kUl
I could stand there all night — if it's not for the biting wind that hits me, whipping against my skin. Reluctantly, I go inside and close the door behind me.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6UfCJJEWdw
***653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4qYeTaB1ZP
Two days have past since I last saw Kwamé. I think that part of the reason why he might be avoiding me, is because of the fact that he faces some uncomfortable topics when he is around me. Additionally, he probably thinks that I deserve better friends.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtDz9CoInyp
Utter rubbish.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiwXnjyz2Rq
I've waited for him to come around, but I guess that I'm more impatient than I thought. That's probably why I've found myself here, outside of Akatua's door at two minutes past twelve, the heat causing my yellow cotton blouse to stick to my sweat covered skin. I only have to knock three times before I hear the telltale noises from inside the house, indicating that she is on her way.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6yumPyYtUz
"Nya," she greets with a smile, her flower themed sundress bellowing as a sudden gust of wind rushes into the house.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN2fKPE8Uw2
"Have you seen Kwamé?" The desperation colours my voice. Usually I'm not this rude, and I've never been this desperate for anyone , but my pride is officially gone with the wind.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPAZzYfuKIn
Her smile falls, giving me my answer — the answer that I don't want.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGcO83xIOTY
"No. I haven't seen him since the other night."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYshEmifsdL
"Okay." My reply is that of a broken soul. My mood is now crushed, all hope gone, not that there was much to begin with. I turn to leave, but she stops me by calling my name.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQBRyDGU2Og
"Yes?" I ask.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9KTyFnJLsm
She bites her lip and fumbles with her fingers a little bit, looking at the floor. It's clear to me that she's uncomfortable. "I was actually going to come over to your house." She chuckles nervously, drawing patterns on the ground with her foot.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmsLIxpJ58q
"And why would you do that?" My interest is piqued. She knows that I am hesitant in my relations with her, so whatever she was coming over to discuss with me could not have been trivial.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe8SDwBriFV
She rolls her shoulders, as if preparing herself for a big moment. 653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrgIBIuSGw9
"I was going to tell you the truth about why I left you in that orphanage."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5MuWul7lZH
I am completely flabbergasted. Whatever I was expecting... it definitely was not that. The strange thing, most peculiar about this situation, is that I've been waiting for this moment for so long, but now that it's here, I'm not quite so sure that I'm ready to hear the truth.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ75a4Mv3GiT
"Come inside," she insists, stepping to the side to let me into the room.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9t72RMpWoA
I eye the interior with uncertainty and discomfort. Deep down, though, is the knowledge that this will have to happen at some point. With a certain degree of reluctance, my feet take me into the house.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHwPNNeQj1r
***653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl4HhrKd75s
We sit latitudinally across the rectangular, wooden table from each other, a cup of coffee between each of our hands. The caffeine has given me an extra zing of energy. 653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKD0ma9n2Qx
"I don't know where to start." Her words are barely audible, just above a whisper, but I hear them clearly.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0DYmbLzzA3
"From the beginning. Who was this River Mumma and what business did you have with her?"653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjFxkJmb8b5
Her fingers tap a nervous beat on the side of her coffee cup. "It's a strange story, but please bear with me."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTgrdGdXN7H
I nod in assertion.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4RS4xA8d6j
"Okay." She released a nervous breath. "It was many, many years ago, when I made a deal with her," she begins. "Her name is Lu'lu, a descendant of the West African spirits, now known as Mami Wata. When the slaves came over, some of them came over too, but the island changed them, made them more vicious. The rivers here are smaller, more uncomfortable for them. Additionally, they had to watch the people they came to care about go through some horrible things. They became apathetic, even hateful, to cope with it.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgc3QqpHqh3
"This one girl, Lu'lu... we made a deal. I'd give up my first born child in exchange for her help. I agreed because, of course, I had no intention of having a child. Never wanted one. What she didn't tell me was that she intended to get that child whether or not I was willing." She gulps, and I know that whatever she tells me next won't be fun. "She had someone put a tonic in my drink... a tonic that would cause me to clone."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk0D6ewiX1S
At first, I think that I'm hearing wrong, because she just told me that she cloned to form me. I'm her clone.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqtDTJ6l0FR
"What?" My tone is one of incredulity.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3YMWh3rOk8
"I became pregnant with someone who was genetically identical to myself."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡowysWvFZbg
I try to think of something, anything to refute her argument. She can't be right. This has to be a joke.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgDoPF6lWT0
"We don't look the same," I point out. "If you were my clone, we'd be identical. We look similar, but not identical."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ppyw44aDn
She gazes to the side and places her coffee mug on the table, as if trying to think about how to express her thoughts. 653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡshrcLtaEOa
"One day, we will."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg6W4VavOIA
I take a long drink from my coffee. This is a lot to absorb, not just for myself, but for anyone. I'm past not believing things anymore; I accept that there are weird things out there. However, just because I'm capable of believing it doesn't mean that it's not overwhelming me.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiCnh2LeEao
"So when I found out that I was pregnant," she continues, "I tried to save you from a live of misery, of slavery. I tried to abort you." She whispers the last part, and I can tell that she's worried about offending me. I'm not offended, though. Were I in her position, I would have probably done the same thing. Scratch that, I would have definitely done the same thing.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡipQISKkqgv
"But you... you wouldn't die." Her voice wavers slightly, and for a second, I think that she might cry. "I tried everything. The spells and tonics wouldn't work, and when I turned to other methods... I wouldn't die, either." She takes a deep breath, and I feel tears well up in my eyes. What is that I'm feeling? Guilt. How could I have ever judged her?653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmApKXEMlXU
"I was about to cut you out when Kwamé walked in on me. He'd heard me crying and came to check on me... convinced me not to... He told me that he'd help me to hide you. He told me that he knew that you'd be special." She smiled at me, and this time it's a real smile — bitter-sweet, but genuine. "And here we are."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNHn26G7g3p
I can't help but smile back at her.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz7K1Znxk9b
"Yes," I answer, setting the mug down on the table. "Here we are." I can finally do something that I wasn't able to do before: I can forgive her. I realise that I never really did.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWpesVCfip6
My mind sorts through a lot of things. Of course, one of them is Kwamé. So Kwamé knew me before I was born? More importantly, he saved me from this Lu'lu? How could he think that he's a bad person? Kwamé aside, something else comes to me. 653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEyCiZ0NalD
"Tell me something," I begin, leaning forward, a small, but important detail that has been overlooked suddenly jumping out at me. "What was the deal that you made with this woman?"653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMII38LkLgU
"Uh... It's kinda hard to explain." I raise one brow, and she sighs. "I was fighting a great evil at the time, and in order to do so, I had to make myself more... durable. She helped me."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcA82GSkI8y
"How?"653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡed85PP0UCZ
"She let me drink her blood," she deadpans. 653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7N3ObCRkkn
Well, that leaves me speechless. I really need to mentally prepare myself for these things. Note to self: when Akatua starts to act oddly, or says something like "it's hard to explain", know that she's going to say some really weird, possibly gross shit.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPgReUFuuMU
"So..." I begin, not quite recovered from what she just said, "what does that do?"653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIDAeByVW3t
As nonchalantly as ever, she says, "it makes you immortal."653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCNDzbspcXZ
What?653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDgufqUAB5t
"Huh?" I grunt, sounding like a cave woman.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQvEY4PGLxw
She picks up her mug and takes a slow sip from it. She then takes her time to put it back down. As if I'm not here. As if I'm not waiting for answers. Placing it down, and licking her lips, she clears her throat.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj6LUXO7jsY
"I'm immortal, Nya," she tells me, staring determinedly at the space above my head. A long, deafening silence follows her statement — but not as deafening as her next words.653Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeMpuh6ckxE
"And you are, too."
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