Kwamé has been here for over two hours, and has barely said anything. That has given me more than enough time to openly stare at him - and he's damn good looking. His face is perfectly chiseled, his brows perfectly arched, and his grey, almond eyes perfectly set in his warm caramel coloured face.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1oh2svZuuO
He's made me soup, taken care of me, made sure that I'm alright - but he's procrastinating. A part of me knew he would, knew that he'd be reluctant to tell me. In a way, he's just as indecisive as I am. He just sits there looking at his glass in his hands, not wanting to address the very large elephants in the room.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPK4FlVWBAk
"You know that you're going to have to talk to me sooner or later," I insist.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIuXf0vUayy
"How about later?" he suggests as he looks at the beautifully designed green carpet spread out across the living room floor. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY2CCDP2xA5
"Kwamé."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCDS4VK5xhx
"What?" he asks.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWp3vJ88Afi
"Talk to me. Please."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCClNt3TEef
He looks down and sighs heavily, his grey eyes glued to the floor. "I don't know what to say."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqvJOedJv6g
"Let's address the fact that I'm seeing you in human form for the first time," I suggest. At the moment, it is the more intriguing topic. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDSPsm9l8tL
"Let's not talk about that. I only did it so that I could take care of you."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrforDW8msG
"Kwamé, this is big," I tell him, stating the obvious. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw1qh21w9Yn
"I know, and I hope it won't happen again. You need some friends."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzZ2fNRv4hE
"How did you know that I was sick?" I ask, changing the subject. I don't want to talk about my lack of friends right now. It's never bothered me before, so I don't know why it should now. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSrxHGodRhQ
"I heard you sniffling and vomiting last night, and this morning, your breathing sounded off."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3hskpBcAqx
"Woah, wait- my breathing?" I ask, about an octave higher that my normal pitch. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxVGGs2DBE5
"Yeah, I hear things better than humans."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ5lelZf8lC
"So you heard our conversation last night?"624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxXxPtS0qyw
"I could hear you talking, but I wasn't listening to the words. I wasn't paying attention. I wanted to give you privacy."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKPADioDZt7
"How kind of you," I say, surprised by his behaviour. Then again, I don't really know him, do I? Where it me, I would probably eavesdrop. No, I would definitely eavesdrop. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj5dzLXsIK3
"Well, while I am inquisitive, I do have my limits."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv1iTBrubJt
"Well, that's good to know."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu9VfNjKY3W
We sit in silence for a few moments, before he clears his throat.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡltGRFIapiS
"So, I have a story for you."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0ANivkORf5
Finally.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB2q1ThDyqh
I place the now empty soup bowl on the coffee table, and look at him, sitting in the chair opposite me. He mimics my actions with his glass. I wait for him to begin. For a moment, I don't think that he'll tell me. However, something in my eyes must encourage him, because I see it in his eyes the second that he makes his decision.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXTsXZXsmVt
He laughs without humour, and then exhales deeply.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡutIr77slut
"I was born on Saturday, July 7, 1677, to a slave mother and a white, plantation owner father. My father decided to keep me as a member of the household - not quite a son - instead of as a slave. I guess he couldn't stand the idea of having a member of his bloodline working in a field or as a house slave. He treated me with ambivalence; for my whole life, he was, at best, merely tolerant of me. The only person who ever showed me true love was my mother. When I was nineteen, my father died. He had no close relatives, but rather than let his father's plantation go to the government, he left it to his bastard half-breed son. That is all he ever saw me as, anyway." He stops to take a deep breath before continuing his story. "I, however, was overcome with the power rush of actually owning something for once in my life. He wrote it in his will to ensure my freedom, so that no one would try to take advantage of me, force me into slavery. I mistook my father's actions for love, and I forsook those who did love me. My mother, brothers, my sister, and all the other slaves... I didn't abuse them, but I'd be lying if I said that the power didn't get to my head. The problem isn't with what I did, though... It's with what I didn't do. I didn't free them."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2g68QuTPuC
"So when you died...?" I ask, trailing off. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9I218CXgZ1
"I died at age twenty six, a few days before my twenty seventh birthday. Pneumonia."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡinXwP8Hl0a
"Your mother?" I push, although I can take a pretty good guess as to what happened. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnvXkb9e3pC
"I didn't write a will, and I had no heirs, so when I died, she remained a slave, and the plantation went to the government. I could have helped her, helped them, helped all of them... but I was so damn selfish."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOFX536sGzd
Damn. I don't know what I was expecting, but it sure as hell wasn't that.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ZVee3sLjp
"So, you see, I'm a monster," he tells me with a painful smile on his face. I can see the hurt and anger deep in his eyes. Anger directed inwards, at himself. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpC7GIKWTZs
"No, you're not," I reassure him. "Formerly an asshole, maybe. But from what I've seen, you're not a monster."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUFVo8ev1aJ
"So why have I been damned to this for eternity?" Despise the obvious feelings that can be read on his face, his voice is monotonous, devoid of any emotion. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRXN29YSZnn
He has a good point.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIHhxEajubA
"Maybe, it is you," I tell him. "Maybe, it's a result of the way that you saw yourself when you were dying. How did you feel? What did you feel?" I ask him.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3sF2dABZPC
He looks into my eyes, and then looks down, biting his lip, before letting out a huge sigh.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5EC3Q6Izwb
"Regret. Regret and self-loathing. I hated myself for not loving my family while I was alive. I called for a lawyer to get my will in place, but when he arrived, I was too far gone."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4SzovoER1K
Can you ever... move on?" I ask him.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoLpjeoQltS
He chuckles softly.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu6qudEc7AM
"No. I'm stuck like this forever."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHFs2fclupy
"If you can be human, why is it so bad?"624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsx5DWv2xbO
"Because we always want to go back to being an animal. There's always that urge to be what you're meant to be- a murderous bull."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUhs0XQgrEZ
"Murderous?"624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB1q2tMDaVH
"Yes. It makes you angry. Makes you want to kill, feed off of the fear of others, feel some kind of power and control when you've been powerless for so long." While he's talking, he stared into my eyes with great determination - trying to convince me that he is a monster.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqYgeCZusXz
"Have you ever done that?"624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlLhS1yf5tw
"Once. He was my enemy."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4W9oJjaBDl
"Oh."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡow2NKj8mhr
I can tell that there's more to the story, but he leaves it at that, probably in an attempt to scare me.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCvqXKhM4gg
"I like you, Kwamé," I tell him. "And you don't scare me."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgyeL9KNoPE
"I should."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3PXY4KUxLM
"But you don't." Truthfully, I see no reason to fear him. He thinks he's worse than he really is. Consumed by guilt, he's become this person filled with self hatred and self loathing, convinced that he's an evil entity.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2tpXsIlLEY
I don't believe that that is true. He needs to give himself another chance.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMhnuUWIcs4
But if I am to tell him that... then I also need to be forgiving. I need to give my mother another chance.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3MHwNVniqS
"Tell you what - how about we both learn forgiveness? You try to forgive yourself, and I try to forgive my mother. Starting now."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYdJM6MwDtX
"You'll give her another chance?" he asks hopefully. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ0v6LYp4G8
"If you do the same for yourself. I'll meet with her soon."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzrkCiUYuYr
Looking rather torn, he looks into my eyes as if searching deep into my soul for an alternative. When he finds none, he lets out a deep sigh.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTGaFEwOBN4
"Fine. But I'm only doing this for your mother."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTTSsopnaXS
I show my gratitude with a large smile stretching from ear to ear. As I look at him sitting there, unsure as ever, I know that I won't regret this decision. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH0CjGel9UJ
***624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyUiszY56k4
School has become one of the most boring, mundane things that I have ever experienced. Perhaps it's due to the supernatural that has filled my life in every other aspect. Still, I'm finding it increasingly difficult to concentrate in lab sessions, which is never a good thing. Today, though... today, I have a plan. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr0cBvcZ3Ts
After sneaking past a sleeping Kwamé laying on my couch - I didn't even know that he slept - I planned on going to do some research. The main library hosts an extensive collection of books, some of which must be on Jamaican folklore. I came up with this plan the last time I spoke to Kwamé, actually. I decided that I would try to find out as much as possible on the topic. However, as we all know, things don't always turn out the way we want. Or that's what I'm hearing now, since I've never had this problem before. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbdo5RNuRI2
"No ID, no entrance," the guard outside of the library says to me. The fact that I'm sick only makes me more irritable. I don't know if she can tell I that I'm seething, but she leans back in her seat, moving away from me. Of course, I would have to leave my ID at home today of all days. Of course.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkGX2sG1yhE
"Look, I'll give you my ID number," I try to bargain, sniffling a few times. "620114-"624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxJTwAHzJ93
"No," she insists, "I need the actual ID."624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3lQI3GTJKv
So of course, my brilliant plan falls through.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk87Lt1cJFU
Instead of having a library of books available to me, all I have is the internet. Which is still pretty good. Sitting on the library steps in my oversized sweater, I pull out my iPad and type in Rolling Calf in the search engine... only to find nothing, because unsurprisingly, the WiFi is being a bitch and a half. I grind my teeth so hard, it feels as if they could crush diamonds. Exhaling steadily, I agree with myself that I will continue my search once I get home.624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB6hNWqHFa7
This seamed like a better idea in my head, because once I reach home, and into my room with Kwamé in the shower outside (not the en suite one) the only things that pop up are things that I already know. Some of it I suspect to be utter rubbish, for example, throwing things on the ground for a rolling calf to count, and then running away. I can hardly imagine Kwamé stopping to count rice grains while his "victim" escapes, or getting confused at an intersection*. In terms of the river mumma, I knew this already, except for one small detail:624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYO0DWyYyB1
During the times of slavery, sacrifices would be made to the river mumma during a drought, or when someone wanted to cross the river. The fish in that area would not be eaten, because they were thought to be her children. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr4ujKx9Rr8
Paraphrasing a bit, but that's basically what it says. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡilaFkrN05M
I was aware of the part where the fish were her children, but the rest sounds like utter bullcrap. Then again, isn't anything possible at this point in time? 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡula8eXUJkJ
Duppies: been there, done that. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡimmkMQQvhO
However, there's one thing there that I don't hear about every day, even though I know about it: Ol' Higue. Ol' Higue... I remember read a poem about her for my CSEC* Literature exam. The creature is an old witch who sheds her skin and takes the form of what some say to be an owl, and what others say to be a ball of light - personally, I think that owl is more plausible, but who the hell knows anymore - and preys on people in their sleep, especially babies. Kind of like a vampire. If salt is placed on her skin she will not be able to put it back on, which will make her vulnerable. If you throw rice on the ground - why are we so obsessed with rice? - she will have to count it. This was thought to be an explanation to grieving mothers for SIDS, but knowing what I know now, it's probably true. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlDnzoXfv3w
But none of this helps me, since I already know most of it. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9JD3ZGrr3l
Sighing, I go to my bookshelf and pull out my "World of Poetry" book to look for clues. I sit and skim through the poems, some of which I was assigned. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ixLJ9gqeh
"Ol' Higue... 'Le loupgarou'..." I stop dead when I spot a poem that I've never read before. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu8A4zQ8uIY
My Mother's Sea Chanty. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZlKEnuZ1P0
It's a poem about a woman who's mother is a mermaid... in the sea. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb41fFzT89T
With a huff of frustration, I slam the book closed. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPuvIZeF6IR
Deciding to take a different approach, I research Obeah spells, abandoning my quest to explain Kwamé for the time being. It is rather odd to be researching something that scares the crap out of you, just for the sake of understanding yourself. In a way, it kind of means that you're scared of yourself. Depressing, really. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVZcCgALtOw
I come across an anti bad luck charm, something that I might need soon if I continue on this trajectory. It looks too simple, though, reminding me of a Harry Potter spell, like "Expecto Patronum". Still, I screenshot it, and continue my search. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcIqxDGnNy2
It is then that I find something that is rather frightening. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgnmCdwKQ1T
I come across a website that offers obeah spells, and says that payment is not needed until results are seen. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡckN9T0dPyi
Now although I have always believed in obeah, I also know that many people who claim to perform "obeah" are scammers, preying on uneducated families with children who have mental illnesses or seizure disorders. It is a common misconception among many Jamaicans that seizures are caused by demon possession. But this... this is as real as it can possibly get. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA05nZfn7EI
Quickly, I exit the website, as if something is going to jump out the screen at me. I'm frightened, I can't deny it. If I did, my pulse rate and breathing would definitely give me away. But other than fear, there's something else... 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2INleNkcPM
Excitement. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi1ETPGn59g
Oh dear God, Nya. You're in for a rough ride, aren't you?624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLW6NJTg2sM
And for once, I completely agree with my inner voice, no indecisiveness, just acceptance. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY25mLOz9jj
***624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn07edS0sqo
A/N624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmUnhbIKgHM
624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyETL640HrH
I actually found a website that said that 😅624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSF9DsGmBfg
Also, the thing about an intersection: supposedly, if you go to an intersection, the rolling calf will get confused. They are also afraid of being beaten by a whip (some say specifically a tarred whip in the left hand). They supposedly carry a chain and / or a bell, so you can hear them approaching, but I didn't want Kwamé to have that. 624Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWqKZ9D0fgb
*CSEC: Caribbean Secondary Examination Certificate.
ns 15.158.61.6da2
