My head hurts. Strange for me, because I'm not used to feeling physical pain. Takes me back to the time when I got sick. I always wondered what people meant when they said that they had a headache; it's a strange feeling; strange, and very unpleasant. It is honest to God spinning, and I don't know what to do. I don't know how to feel.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnMdQlTaO2R
"What do you mean that I'm immortal?" The sound coming from my throat is closer to a croak than anything else.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPWLnlNayCu
"You can't die."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCgcgsygFdV
No shit. Obviously, I got that part, that I won't grow old and die; I want to know the extent of my immortality. I mean, even the vampires in those stories can die, right?644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA8BUDGTcWi
"Not even if someone cuts my head off or burns me?"644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBgtntOWzp3
"Nope. You'll just reform."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhHkmGD29yc
Well, I shouldn't be shocked. Should anything really surprise me anymore? 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4oBzXukSdJ
This does.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoYCGxH9478
"When you turn exactly the same age as I did when I became immortal — 20 years, 49 weeks and 2 days — you will look exactly like me. That's another reason why I came for you. I wanted to prepare you for it. And once upon a time, I looked exactly the same as you do now."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJs0WygM0j9
It's so surprising, so unnatural, that I cannot wrap my head around it. She has shattered my concept of reality, making me realise that many things that I was sure of aren't real. It's like a child being told that Santa Claus isn't real. I never believed in Santa, but I know that many of the children in the orphanage did. They were told by Miss Andrea, one of our caregivers, that some old man with a big belly would sneak in and leave Charles chocolate for us, which we would consume on Christmas day. Of course, I had figured out that someone had put it out for us, because, come on, the story just sounds stupid. However, the Christmas when I was five years old, Miss Andrea was on bed rest because of complications in her pregnancy, and as a result, no chocolate came. When the children started to ask questions, they were informed by the other caretakers that Santa wasn't real. They were heartbroken, but more than that, they couldn't understand how it was that something that they had always believed, been convinced of, seen 'evidence' of was not real. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡib9ni1UIfQ
The only difference is that Santa Claus isn't logical, so when they were told that he wasn't real, even as young children, they could eventually, after some convincing and explaining, understand why. The concept of immortality is not logical, not rational, and up until now, she has not given me a good explanation as to why it exists.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjfUdLsnjyy
I can accept everything else, but this is just downright insane. Funny how I can believe in river mummas and rolling calves, but I can't believe that I'm immortal. Maybe because river mummas are spirits, and rolling calves are already dead.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrVjC5GCjR1
But is it logical that Kwamé can appear in the form of a man? A good looking man, actually... So why is it so hard to believe that you're immortal?644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMhajUp4dmq
"I don't want to live forever." That's the God honest truth. That's how I feel, because who does? Who wants to walk the earth forever until their life loses all meaning, but still, they are forced to live on? 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2j1k3Eo4VW
Okay, fine. Immortality is something that many people desperately want, but I don't. Never had. I think of Kwamé, and I shudder at just how depressing his life must be. Hearing my own fate I am now able to truly better how awful his life must be. Fear can help one to better appreciate and comprehend certain situations.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2f1iCa28GA
"I'm sorry." Her voice, her face... it's full of guilt. I don't want her to feel guilty. I realise that my feelings of animosity towards her have changed. I don't know when and how, but it doesn't feel sudden. She must have been growing on me, and I didn't even notice. I decide to change the subject for the sake of her feelings. Rather than contemplating how dull and boring my existence will eventually become, and how painful Kwamé's predicament must be for him, I instead start to think about how her immortality has affected her. Torturing myself with depressing thoughts can come later.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSstdqI6Uv1
"When you said that you made a deal many years ago, how many years ago was it?" I am honestly curious about this, considering the new factor of immortality. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5j4Rb8lK8P
She looks to the side and purses her lips, contemplating the question. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ62sIkY1Ry4
"About two hundred and fifty." The number is shocking, but instead of letting my mouth hang open, I pick up my coffee and take a sip. This just points out to me how serious this immortality thing is. Again, Kwamé springs to my mind. I begin to think about what he is going through, walking the earth with his demons and no possibility of relief outside of himself. Despite my sudden feelings of dread, I keep my express stoic. The last thing I want is for her to feel dreadful again. However, this time, she grins at me.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT7wz5z6FG5
"What?" I demand, placing the cup down on the table. The question comes out a little bit more aggressively than I intended for it to. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNy3IFI9zkg
She just shakes her head, amused. "It's just nice of you to spare my feelings by pretending not to be shocked. Afraid. I can tell that you are."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4i8iO7ziR8
"How do you do that?" The question has been burning a hole in my mind, on the tip of my tongue for ages now, but I haven't gotten the courage to ask her. How does she know everything? Any little unsaid emotion that I have, she seems to know about it. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf7IfxW6WFf
She leans forward slightly, urging me to do the same. "I can feel your emotions. It makes me capable of making an educated guess as to what you are thinking." That explains a lot. It doesn't seem so creepy anymore. She bites her lip, as if thinking hard about her next words before saying them. "For example, I know that you've been generally gloomy lately, and I think I know why."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC4YsPEXe4T
The air leaves my lips in a rush, as I sigh in defeat. I guess I can't avoid talking about him. Maybe is should. Since the last time I spoke to him, outside of sleep, I haven't been able to go a full twenty minutes without thinking about him.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlDam02fWlr
"Listen..." The dim lighting almost seems to emphasise the lines and creases of her face, making her appear older. than her supposed biological age of twenty two. "He'll come around. He just has his moments." 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN42e2BWJh7
I nod to let her know that I believe her. I didn't expect him to sulk forever, I just don't want him to feel like that. He deserves better. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6eqlcpenYB
"I just wish that he didn't feel so worthless," I rush out.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKtQG3WqeUF
"Hey." She tries to make it sound as if she suddenly has an idea, but I know exactly what she's doing. She's trying to distract me. "Would you like to meet someone?" 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLFvFldzSYU
As in a random stranger? Or a possible mentor? Another obeah person? 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE28YvRYwht
"She practices herbal medicine, and makes the most amazing ginuea hen weed tea that I have ever had." 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqu5uu4IpTE
"But... why?" What does that have to do with anything? It's so random, and I can't make sense of it. I hope to God that it is nothing that will freak me out. I've had enough of that for today.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpCYaCUymlR
"It will give you perspective." 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeqpm0bHIMO
I ponder her words and definitely not for the first time, I wonder what the hell she's talking about. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8XOlVJPf0G
***644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLpbHhO19cz
The first thing that I notice is the strong scent of lavender as I walk into the crowded greenhouse. Of course, the person — woman — that we're looking for would have to be in a greenhouse, not in her house, or a place that doesn't look like an enchanted garden. It's kinda scary; too many plants blocking the sunlight from fully illuminating the room, making it appear as of some mythical creature could charge forth at any point.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmSRFog7qAu
"Cecile?" she calls out to the seemingly empty greenhouse. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLT1cJ2yncq
I hear a rustling among the leaves, and then the muted thud of a footstep. As the footfalls and movement of the leaves get closer and closer, this "Cecile" begins to speak.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPzIzXK2Dpk
"Akatua, my dear," she purrs as she comes into view. She is an old woman, wrinkles covering every inch of her skin. She cracks a smile, which enhances the crow's feet beneath her eyes. "It's been forever. Have you neglected me?"644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDjk3txv3Qp
"It's been four months, Cecile," Akatua answers with a smirk. "I see that unsurprisingly, you haven't changed. At all. Still as melodramatic as ever."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmSvggbfjjp
Cecile simply rolls her eyes and smiles at my mother.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfdBpAXgr2C
My mother? Since when have I started to think of her as that?644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPmKZRA31E6
"I want to teach her herbal medicine."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2mfCKPbO43
I breathe a sigh of relief. This is probably the most normal things that she has suggested since I've met her. No magic. No obeah. Just herbs.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5kQioTAn1L
"Okay," Cecile gardens, nodding her head, and then turning to face me. "How much do you know about herbology, young one?" she asks.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIXQU0v7JfA
I swallow and clear my throat. "Not much," I answer. She nods her head and smiles.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgW4HeiprmH
"Well, let's see what we can do with you," she says. I smile back at her, positivity filling me up inside. This is something that I can manage; normal, manageable. Probably something that Akatua knew that I needed. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRyK6e2AYls
As always with Akatua, things were simple when said, but rather difficult to execute. Well, difficult for me. To start with, I can't cut or crush plants to save my life. Funny how I'm doing electives and classes in both biology and chemistry, but I can barely use a knife properly. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1xWDqFRob0
"It takes some time yo master, dear. Would've been helpful if you cooked more."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaF9wkUiHG8
Akatua laughs at this, but unsuccessfully tries to disguise it as a cough.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeDIc3PoGVn
"Can't I just use a grinder?" I whine.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ07UadCdx5
"No," she responds. "A grinder doesn't work as well as a knife. And we aren't doing something that a grinder is used for, anyway."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMZ7AhPB62K
Sighing, I put my knife down and rub my hands on my apron. "My hands are tired," I announce, causing them to both look at me in surprise. I don't know why; this is my fifth attempt at extracting Aloe Vera gel and I've messed it up just as badly as the other times. I hear Cecile smirk; it's a tiny sound, barely audible, but it still ticks me off. I turn to her and give her a glare that has her stepping back. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqOF8WNULvd
"Nya, be nice," Akatua scolds. I close my eyes and count to ten, pretending that they aren't there. When I reopen them, I feel significantly calmer, though not completely calm.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlFuX1K2BMh
"Why am I doing this?" I ask Akatua in a hushed voice. She simply shrugs.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyHr1jcC5qN
"I thought that it would be interesting to learn," she replies.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ19Z4NAPW3U
"Well, it's really hard."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Bq1klwOD8
"It just takes practice, dear," Cecile says to me. I almost forgot about her. I probably would have, if I couldn't sell her sweet scent, Pink Chiffon from Bath and Body Works if I'm not mistaken. 644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy3ETy1KTDs
"Well, I think I've had enough practice for today," I comment. "Can we go home now?"644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ576dRtd8Ex
"Actually, Nya... I actually came here for some of her herbs. Give me five minutes and I'll be right with you."644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡheMgBFeLwG
I stand in the middle of the green house while they talk and walk around, cutting off and pulling out pieces of plants. It's a typical Jamaican makeshift greenhouse, made from a green, synthetic fibre mesh rather than glass. They take their time, but rather than feeling alone and abandoned in a stranger's greenhouse... I feel at peace. Maybe I really was born to be in this strange position with Akatua mentoring me and being a mother at once. Maybe I was always destined for greatness.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr7swUtuU5d
Who are you kidding, Nya? You've always been destined to be more than what you were.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMoQU3NBIxT
It is because of this new epiphany, the full weight and reality coming down on me at once, that I have a good feeling about this.644Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXEF1tMIABS
God, I really need to work on my mood swings.
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