A/N: I'll be adding music that I listened to while writing these soon. I've been incredibly busy with my short film, podcast, and school work, so thank you all for being patient. I'm definitely not the best at writing poetry but hopefully it's still enjoyable for you lovelies! This was probably the trickiest poem I've written along with my Villanelle (coming soon). I was strongly inspired by my own experiences and Melanie Martinez's music (I'll post a couple links when I can of the songs I listened to while writing this). Sestinas are INCREDIBLY repetitive, as every stanza must have the same repeating words at the end of each line in a certain order. Pretty tricky to lay out and write, but I've gotten it finished at least. 693Please respect copyright.PENANAj8a1w8zfWf
As always, thank you lovelies! Hugs to all of you!
693Please respect copyright.PENANALXV3wRrmIs
Did you know that you’ve driven me out of my mind?
But instead of crying about it, this just means I can focus on me.
I’m sick of watching my mouth all the time around you,
you’ve suddenly turned me into something violent; just look at this.
But I’m still struggling to accept the way things are now.
I’ve gotten to used to these bladed words and I’m so tired of it.
I’ve been pushed far enough, and I just can’t stand it,
so I’m telling you to let me erase you from my mind.
I’m throwing myself a pity party and I don’t even care now.
I was always happy when you were with me,
but now I know that I can’t comprehend this,
and I’m sick of arguing only to be brought down by you.
I thought that we’d be together forever, but I just didn’t know you.
I know this isn’t right even though I don’t quite understand all of it,
but all I know is that I won’t be able to go through with this.
When you’re not right by my side, I don’t even mind.
You were so sweet, until the day that you didn’t need me.
I can’t keep holding onto something that isn’t real, so we’re done now.
Finally accepted that I can stand on my own and live in the now
instead of lingering on my past mistakes and trying catch up to you.
If you keep treating me like a toy, then you’re nothing but a piece of meat to me.
You still have everything you stole from me and you’ve run away with it.
Now I’m beyond mad, so this is me giving you a piece of my mind
because how am I supposed to have known that you would do this?
You have to actually love me if you want all of this.
If you choose me, there will be no more turning back now
because I hate that you’re always so foggy-minded.
I used to think that I should throw my life away for you,
but now they tell me to buy more meds at this point I’ll try it,
because I’m still depressed, and it’s like you tried to kill me.
These cotton candy memories are bittersweet to me,
and this roller coaster can’t get any higher than this.
I used to love this carnival, but now I can’t stand it.
Whenever you call me stupid for the things I do now,
I remember that you’ve only ever made me change for you.
Before you tore me down, I used to use my heart instead of my mind
I can’t bet my heart on it, but I hope you still love me even now.
You linger with me, but I told myself that I’m done with this.
I keep thinking I know you, but you always change your mind.
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