Seven words, Bruce Wayne doesn't know anything about girls!
It was about a year after I moved in with Bruce and let me tell you, you learn some strange things when you keep to the shadows. It’s funny really, you think you know someone then after stalking them for a few days your perspective of them changes forever, all the trust you had in them vanishes within minutes and you just hope that they have a good exclamation for their actions.
But that is something to talk about later it isn't that important but it is at the same time it depends on your perspective really... but back to my story a year after I moved in with Mr Wane.
It’s weird really, one day I was my normal self and then for some unknown reason I started to change, it was almost like my mind couldn't configure my emotions. One minute I could feel like I don’t want any happy thoughts, no laughing or even smiling everything had to be just logical and then the next I would be overly happy, not able to stop laughing and smiling. I was a completely different person.
I didn’t know what was wrong with me, no one did, Robbie and Bruce started to realize something was wrong so Bruce decided to take me to a psychiatrist someone he trusted. He told me, “It’s going to be completely confidential between you and the psychiatrist, no one else will find out.” But I think it was really for him that he didn’t want everyone finding out that he was looking after someone who is mentally unstable, he didn’t want his reputation to be effected.
I don’t know, sometimes you wonder about people and their true intentions behind what they say and do. At that time I thought that he was always trying to protect himself, trying to get on with his life with no troubles just him being the rich man who got what he wanted and didn’t have any problems... I soon learned that that was all wrong, all he wanted was to protect me, he didn’t want me to have people look at me differently, and now that I know this I am truly thankful to him, if it wasn’t for him I don’t know if I would have been able to keep it in for so long.
See I wasn’t with Robbie for as long as I wanted to be, it’s just, I don’t know, sometimes you look back on your actions and you realize that if you didn’t do that one thing, if I didn’t over react so much then I bet my life would be normal, I bet I would have never became Harley, she wouldn’t exists anymore, all she would be was a memory of what I used to be like, a coping mechanism to deal with what happened to me which slowly melted away with help and a family around me who cared for me, and never judged.
But then you realize that that could never happened because you did that one thing, I did over react and now I can never take that back... that just pushed me over the edge, that was the moment I had to deal with it myself, put my head down and get on with life, try to achieve something and maybe, just maybe help someone like me, someone who can’t so it on their own, someone who just need time and to never give up on them no matter how much they push you away.
And now that I look back at these moments, back when I thought that I was going to be okay and that nothing could steel me away from what I wanted, I realize that what I thought I wanted then wasn’t what I really did... if I did really want to be normal then I would have tried more, I wouldn’t have kept doing the things I knew brings out that side of me.
I should have followed the warnings.
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