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Amelia lay awake for most of the night. She couldn't help but think about how crazy her life had been today. She couldn't believe how Warren still wasn't scared of her despite what she did to him. It made her sick to her stomach to think she could hurt someone else, especially Warren. Her feelings for him were growing stronger by the moment and she knew they were going to consume her if she didn't have it under control. At least her heart she could contain, for now.575Please respect copyright.PENANA023ZVzpqLp
But these new powers, her spastic abilities, that needed more of her concentration. Soon Warren will eventually get rid of her because, well, she knew deep down that she didn't belong in his life, even if he was just like her, even though he could protect and be the supportive friend she needs to go on living. She could survive it all if she stayed with him. And god did she want it all, she wants this more than anything in the world. Just like most things in life, this wasn't a fairytale.
She worried for Warren most of all. What if her father came looking for? What if he told the police where she was? Did he even know? What if he told everyone who she really was and what she can do? The very thought made her shudder to think he could be so evil. Her father was capable of it. He could do it though; it was something he would do to once again make her wish she didn't have these powers to begin with. To make her wish she was dead. She strongly believed it all these years.
How could she be born a mutant? How could she go on living when other peoples' lives where at stake because of her own selfish reasons to exist? She wasn't meant to, in her eyes. And Warren, as understanding as he seemed, couldn't comprehend that. He would be like the others, shunning her further deep into this, he'd sooner forget than take genuine sympathy. He'd abandon her.
She turned to look at him, watching him sleep. He looked so peaceful and at the same time so worn out, all because of her. She hated that she was the reason for complicating his life any further. Looking at him made her sadder for hoping he'd be hers. Who was she thinking? His blond, wavy hair was covering his eyes which were closed so gently. He really did look like an angel even when he slept. She wanted to touch him badly but she stayed on her corner of the bed pushing that notion aside. To think he'd even allow her to touch him the way she wanted to was ludicrous. Warren was completely the man for someone else; it hurt her to admit that, but it was the truth. He wanted someone just as beautiful as him, who won't cause him worry or pain. Maybe a model or someone malleable. Someone who won't complicate his life just by being in it. Amelia looked at him with strong eyes, she couldn't ignore the obvious.
Looking at Warren made her so weak; on the contrary, it made her feel very much alive. She didn't feel like a freak around him. Knowing this gave her some golden hope but it was wrong. It was so selfish of her to think she would go on being this happy forever. She'd have to leave his life one day and she was dead set on leaving him before he suspects anything. She didn't know how he really felt about that but she is doing this for him. Because she feels so strongly about him, she needed to go and deal with herself. She didn't want to be a problem for Warren. Of course he wouldn't admit that, being so gentle and kind to her from the start. But deep down, he probably felt like she was using him. In a way maybe that is true. Maybe she was a burden to him more than she thought.
Amelia shivered; the moans escaped her lips before she could stop them. She covered her mouth hoping he didn't hear the noises she made. No movement. He was sound asleep like he should be. Now that she thought about it, this moment was a good a time as any to leave this entire situation. The question being: was she brave enough? Could she actually leave him knowing what she knows about him? Knowing that he knows about her and what she can do? Her feelings were completely tied into this. She had the opportunity to leave but she couldn't, right now, she just couldn't. Her feelings for him were much stronger than her will to be alone and abandon his life. She felt stuck and trapped in her mind that warped her inner thoughts. Will it ever end? Her constant battle for why she should stay alive for any reason?
She moved around in bed, staring at him sleeping for a few long moments. If she could have moments like this for the rest of her life, then she wouldn't feel so worthless all the time. But as always, something has to ruin it. Bits and pieces of her father's face came like a dark cloud as she covered her eyes. It seemed so real. It was real. It actually happened. It was like she can't be rid of the bad memories that haunted her every time she wanted to feel happy. She was reliving all of the bad times her father left behind. All the times he used her for money, beat her senseless for something she couldn't help but be.
She didn't realize she was already in tears until she heard Warren moan next to her. Was he dreaming? She watched him through her fingers covering her eyes. When she took them off, more soft moans, sleepy ones came from the man lying next to her. She wanted to touch him, just to make sure he was still here. But she didn't dare. Staring at him was all she could really do. Warren wasn't hers; she needs to stop pretending that he is. The fantasy should end already. Just look at him and look at her. Who would honestly have more people wanting them?
It certainly wasn't her. She never even had a boyfriend or anyone to really look at her without asking her to remove her sunglasses. The most popular girls in school always had the good looking guys with the nice cars and would take them out to fancy restaurants. Amelia was the girl always shoved to the corner that no one would miss even if she was the only one killed in a massive natural disaster. It was just the way things were; she hadn't a choice but to accept it.
"Hey, what is it?" She heard next to her. She turned over, staring directly into Warren's half-awake blue eyes.
The colors in her iris got the better of her and glowed before she could control it. She sat up in bed, feeling Warren's hand coming over hers. He whispered again asking her what was wrong; she wiped her eyes, trying to compose herself. She didn't realize her gulp was louder than her breathing.
"Amelia, talk to me." He started shaking her gently when she didn't respond. She was too far spaced out to function. "Hey, come on, come back."
She gave a tiny yelp when he began to feel her heart which was nearly beating against her chest. His arms immediately came around her tightly, firmly, he held her against his body, feeling the sweat beads drip from her neck, smothering his cheeks. He felt her respond and now he relaxed. Slowly she was coming back to him. He wondered why she was so scared all of a sudden. Did she have a nightmare? What was she thinking of?
When they pulled away their foreheads were leaning against each other. Amelia was so confused. Warren was such a temptation, he was offering so much. He was giving his life, his home, his time, his everything just for her. Why was it so hard for her to accept this?
She couldn't. That was the problem. Maybe she'd leave in the morning. She pulled her face from his and tried to hide everything else.
"I'm sorry, go back to sleep."
Warren cupped her cheeks resiliently. "No, tell me what's wrong. Let me listen."
She pulled back to look into his eyes. Now they were glowing, shining brightly, she pretended it was for her. There's no harm in that.
She shook her head, pulling her long hair back behind her ears. "I don't know what to say anymore…"
Warren kissed her forehead, leaning his lips pressed against her skin for a moment. If only she could let him inside her world. He had a sneaky feeling that it was just like his. He moved his mouth to her ear.
"I wish you would trust me. I want you to feel comfortable telling me things, anything you want. I wish you would let me in."
Amelia's eyes glowed sky blue, brighter than any color she showed him. "I wish it was easy."
Warren felt his wings twitch when he saw her start to cry. Every part of him was aching now. He wanted to make things better, he thought about his feelings for her. They were running deep, much deeper than he could keep up with.
Warren held her tightly against his bare chest, trying emphatically to calm her down because her heart rate had begun to race. He whispered more words to her gently, stroking her shoulder with the tips of his fingers. Her skin was very warm and he was feeling goose bumps spread across his arms. He can't be turned on now. Amelia would never trust him if he acted on this impulse. He was thinking so badly of pressing his mouth all over her neck, her jaw, her face, cheekbones, kissing spots underneath her eyes where tears had fallen. It took everything he had to control this unwavering impulse. But showing her what it feels like to be loved? Why would that scare her? Maybe he was moving too fast. She was struggling with him holding her before; moving further will do more damage.
He couldn't scare her anymore than she already is. To feel her slip away from him will be devastating. He didn't want to think of her not being so close to him. His feelings were taking over, before he could control it with logic. This girl was dangerous but she was his. And he'll be damned if he could let her slip away without a fight. He found her and he isn't going to let her go.
"Look at me," He whispered, her eyes were shifting various colors. It was like she appeared confused on how to feel.
The rainbow trail seeping through her iris, glowing ever more prominent; it made him want to surrender completely. He wanted colors of love, bright, beautiful colors to come through her emotions. No more somber pigments.
She shook as she picked up her face, daring to look at him with something she can't help. She was feeling weak again. Too many reasons to feel this way. Anger, trepidation, weakness, helplessness, stuck; her life on pause. She almost burst out crying until he used some force. Finally alerting her full attention for once.
"I'm not going anywhere. You're safe. Whatever you've been through, you aren't going back there anymore."
Amelia's eye color changed to a soft pink upon hearing those words. They sounded so comforting and exactly what she needed to hear. She gulped down the remainder of her fears. Words, just words, that's what they are, sweet words of comfort. The scene was set, if he was an actor than this was the best performance of pity of his life. But god…his face, he looks so beautiful, so perfect. Was this just a dream or could he really be hers?
She touched his face; it felt so natural to her, almost like her heart was encouraging her to touch more of him. She so badly wanted to.
"Promise me you won't run away?"
Warren smiled, leaning to her ear, "I'll never run away from you. Never. You hear me?"
Amelia swallowed upon hearing these words. She shivered but Warren caught her shoulders before her entire body shook. She felt so warm, her body was beginning to react in a way she wasn't used to. She was trying to trust him. And it was working, whatever he was doing. She hoped he would keep doing that because she didn't want to feel so scared anymore.
"I have to tell you something." Amelia paused before collecting herself. Warren had allowed her room to breath by pulling away only slightly, god knows she needed it for what she was about to say.
"I'm here. Take your time." His words began to soothe her; whatever he was doing is working wonders.
Amelia's glowing eyes couldn't ignore the time, it was half passed dawn and soon it'll be morning. Her uneasiness had been going on for a few hours now before she could notice. But this, what she was about to confess needed some time to really tell out, she needed more of his time than he might have been willing to give.
Warren sat back against the headboard of the bed, staring at her. This may be the moment he was waiting for. She's finally going to be open. He watched her bite her lip and look around the room in the darkness. The glow of her neon colors acting like a flashlight in the bedroom, illuminating whatever object they touched. Then, suddenly the colors had gone out, he checked if her eyes were shut and they weren't.
"I get scared, sometimes of everything. I don't know what its like to just relax anymore. I—" She paused slightly, looking at his face watching her, hanging onto her words. She gulped, picking up where she left off. "I am a mess. I don't feel safe; I'm not used to feeling safe. All I know is being afraid of practically everything."
Warren took her hand, holding onto it, giving it a light squeeze; silently urging her to continue.
"I just feel like every day is one battle after another. No one has really listened to me. No one asked me how I feel about any of this…I find it hard to breathe knowing this is who I am, and now, discovering something else about myself, I don't know how to feel about that either. I'm confused. I don't know if it gets easier…does it?"
Warren was so sucked into her words and story that he slightly jumped when she asked him a question.
He couldn't lie to her, what she was saying made sense, as crazy as it sounded to someone who wasn't a mutant.
"Not if you're around people who can help. Do you know what I mean? Amelia, please look at me. Don't be embarrassed."
Amelia's face scrunched together. Flickering shy blue came from her eyes as she blinked rapidly. She pulled her hair away and tried to breathe in; she wasn't aware she was holding her breath until now.
"Do you know what I mean?" Warren asked again, touching her arm applying little force to try and pull her away from her daze.
Her body shook, she shivered, not from the cold but something inside her. Too much was going on inside her body for anyone to comprehend. How can anyone make sense it? Her eyes bugged out for a second and she caught her breath.
Warren came forward.
"You alright? Do you need something?"
Some answers, she thought. That was the only thing making sense now. Why wasn't she getting answers? Warren can't cuddle her forever. No matter what he says, her time is limited. She looked around the room, suddenly barely able to focus. Her eye-lids were growing heavy. She was beginning to fade. Her body naturally sunk down on the pillow next to Warren's. She couldn't keep her attention alert for long. As important as it was to stay awake, to question Warren while she can, in this moment, her body wasn't allowing her.
She lay down properly, situating her body so it was more comfortable but she didn't face him. Biting her lip she pushed away the tears that wanted to flow down her cheeks. She could feel her eyes burning with anticipation but she used every ounce of control she had left to will what was practically numb to her.
Warren sighed deeply behind her. He frowned when she turned her back to him. He figured he should relax too knowing she was probably really tired after the last few days of what she's been through. He folded his arms up, his wings swung to the side. But in the moment, he wished he would hide them. It just wasn't fair. He struggled with this mutation since he was very young, still to this day it bothers him that he can't be like everyone else. Normal, just human, plain and boring. There isn't a day that goes by what Warren wouldn't give to feel normal again.
Was he crazy? He didn't know. Maybe he scared her, maybe this is the end for him, this has all been one big dream and he's bound to wake up with empty sheets, his fist clutching the sides of the bed, back to whatever mundane existence he held before knowing her. Amelia wasn't real. Was she? Was any of this really real? Were his feelings?
"I…" Amelia started but cleared her throat. Warren was about to say something until he saw movement from her. Her face was crinkled in confusions, eyebrows construed together in a question mark; her eyes were flickering colors again, bringing in a mixture of feelings he couldn't decipher.
Her eyes were stolid on the ceiling. She didn't look at him but she licked her lips breathing in deeply.
"I need you…" Warren drew a sharp intake of breath, pausing to hear more. Amelia wouldn't hurt him but a small piece of him is dreading the other thought that wouldn't bugger away. Someone always needed him for something, wither it was money, his father's connections, his reputation, his name, his arbitrarily good looks. "Warren, I need you. I'm sorry I just do. I need you so badly and I'm scared to ask for help but I don't know, you make me feel like I'm worth something, like I'm worth staying alive. Nobody has ever made me feel this way. I just need you."
Amelia sat up, leaning her chin upon on her knee. The tears came falling down her eyes and before she could hide her face Warren grabbed her and forced her to finally look at him. Her eyes finally focusing on a bright red, she felt scared as he looked at her. His features focused around her face. It was almost like he was holding himself back from something. He pulled his face away when he felt it too close.
"Don't cry. If you need me then I'm yours. You don't have to be scared. And you don't owe me anything in return ok? I'm here for you. I won't let you down. You have my word. Please have faith in me Amelia. Please trust me…because this, right here, right now, is all we have. We're in this together. I told you I am not letting you go now please, don't cry. I can't handle it."
Warren only paused to gather himself, he wasn't done. "If you need me, then trust me."
Amelia blinked slowly, her eyes milky with tears, the last of them spilling from her eyes as she looked at him, hard and serious. As if she was looking at him for the last time.
She saw his eyes. Blue pools of mist ready and willing to save her, be with and protect her through anything, he would be there. He wasn't lying. Warren was telling her the truth. Believing words just like that had to have been the hardest thing she could do, but Warren made her believe in him just by looking at her. She didn't feel so lonely in his eyes.
She sucked in her lips and most of her breath came with it, she didn't want to feel so alone. Going back to that life, wanting to die, the thought was still present in her mind and even though Warren knew this he still wanted to try with her.
Amelia didn't waste anymore time, she leaned in, a familiar moment before them when her lips brushed his again. Only this time, there were no distractions, nothing around them mattered. Amelia was completely entranced by him, his smooth, sensuous breathing, catching her off guard a little, making her feel dizzy and dazed. Her eyes weren't wet with tears but anticipation. She further leaned in, checking where his boundaries were.
"I'm yours, always." Warren closed the space between them; his lips gently touched hers, his face following her rhythm.
He could feel everything, he didn't know about her, but she hides her secrets not only in her eyes but in passion. When he pulled away to look in her eyes, he waited for her to open them. He whispered her name and her eyes fluttered open. A mixture of shock, surprise and misty passion were facing him now.
The kiss was so innocent, so brief; it was all over pretty fast that Amelia didn't have time to think. Warren was the first guy to do that with her. The first man to be affectionate with her like that.
They looked at each other for a few long moments. Neither could say anything. They had come close many times before but Amelia didn't believe Warren would ever kiss her so slow, not in her wildest dreams.
Her eyelids were blinking faster than she intended. Warren sparked a passion inside her that she wasn't even aware she had. She wanted to kiss him again, discover him like he really was hers. Will he let her? She can sure try…
"Wow…" She breathed; it was all she could manage to say.
Warren laughed softly, his short breathing making his nerves apparent. He couldn't believe he did that. He hadn't kissed anyone since…it was a long time since he felt this way about anyone. He felt like he was dreaming, like all of this was a fantasy. Being so insecure about his chances with girls anyway he didn't think it would happen in a long time. Being a human and having wings that spanned 16 feet isn't something he was just willing to share with the world let alone the opposite sex.
Nobody got too close to Warren because he was a mutant. Nobody knew who he really was unless they were his dad or his butler. It was terrifying secret he had to keep to himself. Growing up he was invited to parties, but not parties where he had to be at beach or around a pool. His friends now call him weird because he always wears his long coat. Warren tells them it's because he feels cold, being in New York, during the fall and winter time, he could get away with that excuse. Summer and spring were times he would make up a barrage of excuses: he was tired; his father needed him at work, sick, overslept, drunk, online classes he was behind on. The hospital didn't question anything since he was a volunteer and his famous name and funding had brought in assistance to the corporate business.
As broken and traumatized as she was, Amelia didn't make him feel scared to be who he really is: Angel, it was a nickname his mother, Katherine had given him before she passed away from cancer years ago. They had such a bond that went beyond anything. His mother accepted him, loved him no matter who or what he is. She was his constant. The reason he stayed alive and didn't jam a razor into his chest, puncturing his heart ending it all. He had to live for her. She was his only purpose to breathe.
When his mother died Warren fled home, began to abandon everything, his father didn't care about him as a person or a mutant. All his father cared about was the Worthington name and uphold the fortune 500 reputation that gnawed at him growing up that was chomping on his character hard as a young adult. Knowing this, he'd compromised with his father. Agreeing to put up with him and work, his name, everything his family built by staying near him, his mother would have wanted him to help his father out, his father once said. Warren disagreed. His father, Warren Jr., all he cared about was money and keeping the name going in their legacy. He wanted Warren to be normal so he made his son wear straps under a long overcoat every day of his life to hide the embarrassing truth of his son.
Amelia didn't make him feel like the world was coming down on him. Warren struggles every day with being a mutant, being born a little different than the rest of humanity felt like a sickness. His father made him feel like it was an illness; like he was a freak and therefore he made it a habit to shame his son every time he saw him trying to reveal his wings to the world. Forcing him to see that if he did reveal his identity, the world will judge him and they would lose everything they ever built in their name.
He saw comfort in Amelia, something he always found in his mother, Katherine, who loved him every day of his existence until her candle had gone out too soon. Amelia had so much love inside of her. For all she's been through she is still a survivor. Warren could remember taking care of his mother when she was feeling ill in the beginning stages of her cancer. She had been a survivor as well. She had to be, Warren knew his mother was all he had and he made sure of it to give her everything she needed to stay alive. He wanted to take care of her. He couldn't lose her, she was everything to him, and she was the only thing that mattered in his life. She accepted him, mutant or not. She was his angel even if he was the one who grew the wings.
Amelia's fingers moved Warren's blond hair falling in his face. He was looking off to the side in deep thought. She glanced at his lips; they were quivering. She frowned. Her heart squeezed looking at him; she didn't want him to feel confused. The kiss they shared made her feel so warm; she needed to make him know this. Her fingers touched around his cheeks, tracing near his lips until she stopped when he looked at her.
His face broke out into a warm smile as he leaned in closer, taking the lead, closing the gap between them. He nuzzled his nose with hers like a lion would a lioness. Warren needed to stop worrying so much. Amelia won't leave him. She can't because she knows wherever she goes she'll always take a piece of him with her. They'd been through so much already in the few short days they've known each other. Amelia couldn't leave him, not like his mother did; she wouldn't do that to him.
"I have something I need to say…"
Amelia gulped. The tone Warren used just now made her shiver. She looked at him, waiting for him to speak.
He suddenly kissed both her hands, growing confident by the second.
"Please don't give up on me. Even if you feel like you're going to hurt me, you could never. Don't give up on this. Don't let anything scare you anymore. I'm going to help you. I promise. I mean it, Amelia. Hey, look at me…" He turned her face to glance in her eyes, trying to hold that glow seriously. "Don't give up on me, please trust me."
Amelia felt brave for a moment and placed her palms on his face, bringing him closer to her lips. She brushed her bottom lip against his, feeling the natural instinct kick in her emotions, igniting something new, something pure, a positive feeling, something foreign, she grasped onto it for dear life ignoring everything else that could take it away.
"I trust you. You're the only person I trust right now. You give me so much reason even if I don't deserve it—"
Warren placed his large hands over hers on his cheeks. "But you do. Please know this. You do Amelia. We can do this. We can both survive everything. I won't let you go. Believe in me."
If Amelia had any doubts left Warren shoved them hard into the gutter without warning. She did believe him. It wasn't the idea of believing anymore. She can trust him with her life. He's saved her numerous times and put up with her paranoid antics more than once. More importantly, his kiss demonstrated where his loyalty lies.
Amelia looked in his eyes a final time before leaning completely forward to touch her lips onto his. Now it was her turn to lead. She wanted to do this again since he first had done it. She wanted to do this all night. Even though she wasn't experienced or knew at all what she was doing she followed her heart.
Warren was there, he was more than there, and he was her friend. He was the only person who didn't make her feel completely scared to breathe. Amelia slowed down the kiss when she felt it growing more profusely. Things might lead to something she wasn't ready for.
Warren smiled and kissed her nose, then her forehead and both her cheeks before pulling back to stare at her with open and free eyes.
Her pink shade was returning and he couldn't be happier. He felt proud knowing he was possibly the only one to make her feel that way since it turned him on more than he could say. Everything about Amelia made him want to fall harder, deeper than he ever did for someone. Not since Candy had he felt so strongly about a woman.
All he wanted to do was take care of Amelia and she owed him nothing in return. That's all he wanted. To be hers, to be the one she comes to in time of need.
"We should, go to bed, I mean, hmm, sleep." Amelia's eyes flickered to the clock again; she'd contained her shock when she realized it was passed 5am.
Warren leaned back, pushing his wings above him so they were stretched up high as if he were to take flight. This is the typical position he took when he slept. Now that someone else was sharing his bed he caught himself and pushed them more to the side so he could turn his body so he was facing her.
"Come here…" He whispered, motioning for her to move closer so she was sleeping in his arms.
She smiled slightly before taking his hand gently, moving her body. The envelope in his arms was instant when she was hit with his body heat. Warren sure had a lot of body heat, it felt like curling up to a fireplace after a cold, rainy day.
She realized one thing in that moment while she hugged his body and opened her eyes: she is his.
Closing her eyes, she finally drifted to repose after god only knows how long she was without it. The room was suddenly harmonious, she had felt safe. She wanted this to be just the beginning.
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