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I am quietly installed in my office. This is my own place, in this family home. Far from the adventures of my children, I appreciate being able to breathe calmly from time to time. There, I decompress and take the time to think, to drown myself in my thoughts, in my memories.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3qNQLResAn
Suddenly there is a knock at the door. I quickly slip the photo I had been looking at for several minutes into the pocket of my blouse, and pretend to be concentrating on a file. I barely have time to say, “Come in” when the door opens to reveal my daughter. At seventeen and a half years old, she has behaved like a real tornado since the start of her adolescence, four years earlier. However, in her face framed by long brown hair, childhood can still be seen.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoV50Y508xh
— Mom, I need to talk to you about something super important ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6tUFR9M21g
I suppress a smile. With Orlane, everything is always mega important ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ67JXWEUdIn
— Ok I hear you.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3dxndBQLIf
— With Alexandra, we would like to get a tattoo ! She says, excited, as if it’s the best news of the year.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡItmUt8gFhv
— A tattoo ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa2p0lIfBXN
She nods energetically.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGHr47cOEVn
— While you are still a minor ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8hksQUODt
— Soon to be an adult.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGdzQ81UKCN
— Yes, so seventeen years and counting.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCL8Mz18zHB
— If you say so. So, is it yes ? I need parental consent to do this.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGlSdmgqG1p
— No way ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡooin51pZa2
As I expected, my daughter's face turns an angry red, while her light eyes darken.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGu2m4wsNvB
— You never let me do anything cool ! She shouts, slamming the door behind her.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhHvLWxUMH2
Another of these great classics is to avoid any discussion by taking long strides. I hear him scream.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4G1jarrfT2
— She always forbids me from everything ! She’s never there for us ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtXI38hi9Ql
— You exaggerate ! Mom is always there whenever we need her, tries to calm my son down in a paternalistic tone.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRXeHHS5ICI
Calm, thoughtful and very mature in nature for a young man of sixteen, my son has a character that is the polar opposite of that of his sister.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8GgACEV1Dk
— She’s not a cool mother ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMQDTJu94MY
I decide to join them in the kitchen.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7WIXmzuB00
— If being fashionable means letting you drink alcohol, do drugs, let you date anyone, or allow you to get tattoos, then no, I'm not cool...337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcpONNHxDiK
— But why don’t you want to ? After all, it’s just a little drawing on the skin, adds my daughter with a pout.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaxCA3kSA7J
My God, how tenacious she is… Like me ultimately.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ91ZRU44FNI
— Orlane, the day you want to get a tattoo for a good reason, I will accept, but not to be like your friends.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr7wiibO4XI
My son looks at us, imperturbable.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ6aDaOfz2K
— You definitely have a tattoo ! She accuses me, angrily.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOUi9zrXVfZ
I look down, weighing the pros and cons, and end up telling them : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwI6fPRJVjs
— Follow me to the living room, both of you. I need to talk to you.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZzWrCDguio
Without a word, they accompany me, and each sit in one of the large armchairs, facing mine.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡegpljYYuvm
— You are both old enough now for me to tell you a story. And please don't interrupt me. The story I am about to tell you is personal to me, but it is important that you know it, because it has made us who we are.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqO3errMYLX
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It all started on September 26, 1991 : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFcs8iyeCjg
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Autumn has not yet arrived although the leaves of the trees are starting to turn red under the less intense rays of the sun.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoTfv3Jktbo
I detail my reflection while doing my hair in front of the mirror. I don't think I'm pretty, although many people tell me otherwise. I'm not very tall, I don't have the figure of a top model, in fact, I find myself rather ordinary. Not to mention this damn hair that refuses to stay styled the way I want it ! Giving up trying to tame them, I abandon my hairbrush and go down the stairs of the house. I'm so happy to be in high school where I'm now one of the big guys. Sixteen is the age where my real life begins, the age where my parents finally treat me like an adult and no longer like an immature child. The age when all dreams are achievable and desires possible.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO43plbSgOQ
My mind escapes for a moment to fly towards Chad, my boyfriend of several months. Chad is young, handsome, athletic and intelligent when he manages to stay focused long enough on his homework instead of thinking about sports, which is hard for him. He's not very tall, but built like a sportsman : all muscles. I like his black hair in a crew cut, and his hazel eyes. We have known each other since childhood. I had been secretly in love with him for years. In high school, I was known for being the type of serious girl, always top of the class, which did not attract boys, much to my despair. Chad is the most popular boy in school, so there was no chance he would be interested in me until a teacher asked me to help him with math. When he finally asked me to go out with him, I couldn't believe it anymore.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjBtDUGnUUr
For six months, Chad and I have been in perfect love...337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxWodh0vk6z
Okay, we only exchanged chaste kisses, we don't go out much, instead spending our time watching movies at his house. I also admit that contrary to what I had always imagined, I don't feel this passion that romance novels boast about, perhaps this is due to the fact that we have few things in common. When Chad kisses me, I have the horrible feeling of kissing my best friend but I’m sure that with time, our story will become more intense, passionate and that this feeling will disappear. After all, he’s the one I always wanted so everything will work out in the end.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡejhCQo5cqc
Letting out a romantic sigh, I enter the kitchen. Almost my entire family is gathered there : Ashley and John, my parents as well as Nina, my younger sister. The only thing missing is Nicolas, my big brother who recently left for New York University and who only comes home for the holidays.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGv9C0mpdBm
— My little Megan… The more I see you, the less you look like my baby, my mother laments, staring at me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWn68GEWnjn
She isn’t very tall, she has a face with soft features that charms most people she meets. I get her brown hair and blue eyes from her. She always expresses herself calmly, but with conviction.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9lRX6vGClK
I act as if his rantings don't matter to me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEtYhNfsrI8
— Mom, I’ll always be your daughter. And then, you have Nina as a baby…337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8ej3nCzK48
My sister makes a face. At thirteen, she sees herself more as a teenager than as the youngest member of the family.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsTSxhh0sMx
— Are you still planning to go to Chad’s party tonight ? How many will you be ? Asks my father before swallowing his coffee.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHZMMKHNJCG
— Yes I’m going. There will be about fifty of us.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFxtGcIRj0a
My father coughs and chokes.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXYUcfSk4oX
— That much ? Ask my mother in turn.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf0D0S1ReRa
I nod yes.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Hkb6v2qJo
— There will be the whole class as well as Chad's friends, that's a lot of people, he's very popular at school.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPU3e1FrWv7
— That’s true, my father agrees with a touch of pride.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoyEQhFAmF9
Even though he tends to be overprotective, I love my father very much. I find him a handsome man for his age. At forty, his dark brown hair begins to take on gray shades at the temples and expression lines slowly creep into his angular face, further marking his smile and his frown.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1kKVBRAQs1
My father works in construction, his specialty is facade maintenance. He judges each house by the quality of its exterior paint ! My mother is a secretary in a real estate agency, which doesn't excite her, but she has fixed hours, which suits her perfectly. We are a middle class American family. We live in a residential neighborhood in the small town of Millisky, Pennsylvania, where almost everyone knows each other, if only by sight. The town has around five thousand souls. We have a hospital, shops, restaurants, cinemas, and even a large shopping center, so we never get bored. In addition, our town is surrounded by a beautiful forest which allows for long walks, we also have a lake about five kilometers to the south. To the west, a hill overlooks the city, it is the chic district where all the local bourgeois have built their beautiful homes, which most often only serve as second homes. To the north, a highway takes us to Pittsburgh, the nearest major city, a two hour drive, and to the east, Philadelphia is a three hour drive.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7gFyXWSrSu
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A little later that day, I'm in the main hallway of the school. It is a large white building, some classrooms have faded walls, originally cream-colored, and the same goes for places of frequent passage. The central corridor has on each side of its walls, two rows of gray lockers stacked on top of each other. I take some books from mine when, turning around, I see a boy of average height, with brown hair and light eyes, walk past me. He looks at me furtively. When I meet his gaze, I feel like I'm falling from a ten- story building. It's a strange thing I've never felt before and it only lasts a few seconds. Coming to my senses, I tell myself that I must be going crazy.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlMPQJDq50s
— Not bad, admires Amy, my best friend, who followed my gaze.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzxU1v581R5
— New student ? I'm asking perfunctorily as I'm sure I've never seen it before.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKdSDDCRKP1
— I’ll find out, says my friend, narrowing her eyes with interest.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKoIv7HF3em
— In any case, he’s very cute, I can’t help but point out.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvDIdb0pFyT
— You're the one who says that, even though you're dating the hottest boy in school ! She exclaims, shocked.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKf9gPzojQR
I smile, remembering that Chad never wanted to go out with her. He preferred me. It's so rare for a boy to reject her that I know she harbors a little resentment towards me. She has never told me openly but sometimes, like this moment, she throws a little barb at me. Without being mean, it gets heavy some days. However, she has been my friend for so long that I don't see myself falling out with her over such a small matter.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe8kJyeZCvP
Later that day, in history class, I am fascinated by the documentary that the professor shows us concerning the liberation of Europe during the Second World War. This is not the first report I have seen on the subject but each time, I am caught up in the violence, the abomination of this conflict. When the images of the concentration camps appear on the screen, I look away. This is too hard for me, so I concentrate on a completely different theme. Since the start of the course, I have had the strange sensation of feeling observed. As I turn to scan the class, I see the new student sitting two rows behind me, his eyes fixed on me. When he realizes that I have noticed him, he returns his gaze to the screen. I imitate him but after a few seconds, I turn around again.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyHi43aoO16
Grid ! I thought, giving a hint of a smile as he refocused on the documentary. For long minutes, I no longer dared to move. It's stupid but this boy intimidates me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEzoDg9gDzp
When the film ends, I turn in my seat to follow the teacher as he walks around the class summarizing what we just saw. The newcomer is still staring at me. His look is indecipherable.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6BXlEpZIF8
— Imagine these families separated during endless years of war, imagine their suffering. If you had been in their place, would you have chosen resignation in the face of the invader or would you have opted for resistance ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZLptOM312x
I raise my hand, certain of my answer.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwBG8DOZyKC
— Yes Megan.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP6ilsfWEp4
— I would have chosen resistance. Faced with injustice, I think I would have been incapable of looking at the situation without taking part in the fight.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgQMkDnPb8K
— Good. Someone else's opinion ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6NGdKjIFcp
Many raise their hands including the new one.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl8sRxaD9NG
— And you, what do you think ? Asks the teacher, addressing him.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq7RZBW1nWc
— I believe that with hindsight, it is easy to give your opinion, but at that time, people who engaged in the resistance ran enormous risks, not only for themselves but also for those close to them. All this must be taken into consideration.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAmVi8C5OMy
— Perfect, Jessy ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3aE0RERIzv
Jessy… 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8cyCr6Sz3S
I have a hard time taking my eyes off him even though his name resonates within me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMnYjFGm9Ur
— For the next class, you will write me a presentation on this subject, continues the professor.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKcCvDnIXdr
The bell announcing the end of classes rings, the new guy immediately picks up his things and leaves, bowing his head. It makes me feel like I'm running away from the whole world.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIGQig2om4k
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I head to the bathroom to put some gloss on my lips and find my friends Amy and Pearl there.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ogoPWwHWe
— So, Meg, where are you with Chad ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQWLIUIxUpf
My cheeks immediately turn red.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNp2VD6Bg9f
— There is nothing to say.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwzgqIuTAnm
— Don’t tell us you haven’t done it yet, Amy insists.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcyagHxNC9Q
— Well no… Well, I mean, do you feel ready ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoK9V4joPEf
Amy shrugs. I know she hasn't been a virgin for some time.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC9acNBzqzI
— There’s no reason, Pearl assures. You're with the boy you've always wanted, so why not go all the way ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzMTWRgr7ca
These words make me think more than they should. I've been dreaming about Chad for years, so why do I feel this stuck ? Why don't my feelings push me to open up completely ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeRucUhQgTj
I feel lost and I know perfectly well that it's not my friends I could confide in. They would immediately judge me, thinking I'm crazy for asking myself a thousand questions when I'm dating a great guy.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuaQtCMxoIp
If only Nick were here, I thought with regret.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbfiCn4pzaw
My brother would be able to advise me perfectly. It's crazy how much I miss him. Looking forward to the next vacation so he can come back to see us.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrFAL5nF0g3
— By the way, have you seen the new one ? Pearl continues, arranging her brown hair in front of the mirror. He is too beautiful ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡexQTdDg691
It’s true that he is beautiful ! A finely sculpted body without being skinny and a face with fine features that I find refined, piercing green eyes lined with long eyelashes, slightly messy light brown hair... I also memorized the little chain with at the end a cross that dangles from his left ear giving him a little rebellious side that I find sexy.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbF9wuymzAP
— I learned a few things about him...337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkwZsD3Jn8s
This simple sentence from Amy focuses all my attention.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4nWSGEhDYw
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A few hours later, at the end of classes, I found my father in the high school parking lot. This day is important to me. I pass my driving license. I am confident, because for several weeks, Chad has been teaching me everything there is to know and, according to him, I am ready.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOW8UZlPddb
— Megan, we need to talk, my father begins.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUYK5KnMN3S
Already knowing that I am going to be treated to a moral lesson, I hold back a sigh.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfgSnd02q04
— It’s about that party at Chad’s. You know I trust you, but... knowing you with him until late...337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8lY5xHfHBB
When I don't answer, he continues : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIlAOjSlGDE
— Will you be… serious this evening ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ25Ap3Gospk
— Dad, I'm still a virgin and I don't plan on that changing tonight.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeJPaUOBXLe
— Thank God, he breathes with relief after grimacing.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG28WPfJx8b
Shortly after, we return home, me with my license in my pocket and my father with the certainty that I am still innocent.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb98RsI8wsT
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In the evening, I found Chad at his house. He lives in a large, modern and chic house, close to the city center. Their villa includes three bedrooms with an independent bathroom, a games room, an office, a fully equipped kitchen and a gigantic living room which, that evening, easily accommodated fifty guests. Outside, in a garden, in which my entire house could fit, is a heated swimming pool. As the girlfriend of the owner of the house, I make a grand entrance. I'm wearing a pretty black silk dress, perfectly fitted, which suits me perfectly. I turn heads as I pass, especially Chad who only has eyes for me. The party is in full swing, the whole class has gathered there.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZHApBolDUb
I'm chatting with Amy in the corner of the room, when I spot the new student, Jessy, standing a little further away. He observes me while chatting with Stanley, a friend of my brother. He stares at me and gives me a small smile to which I can't help but respond.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFKcz67uGyZ
Why am I blushing ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUf3NQi5ea5
— This guy is so hot. I'm going to go and get to know each other, Amy said to me, scrutinizing Jessy.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyimp8rwqGL
Without knowing why, my heart sinks.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAUwXzRhaOZ
— Amy…, my reaction is stupid. You look very pretty with this dress.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcGMj0PV9pf
She smiles. I see her approach Jessy, Stanley quickly walks away while Amy launches into a tirade, pointing out several people in the room. She must inform him of the gossip that is circulating. I can't help the pang of jealousy that creeps into me when I see her place a hand on Jessy's arm. At this moment, he looks up at me, his expression is indecipherable. I have to look elsewhere... But I can't do it.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd8MCTKx0ui
— Are you okay, Meg ? You're having fun ? Chad appears in front of me and places his hands on my hips.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOAvuUrmXhB
Finally I take my eyes off Amy and the new guy. I have to think about something other than his green eyes which make me feel like they are penetrating my soul.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqjO5IQesIR
I place my lips on my boyfriend's in a brief kiss.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpEdZIzETK6
— Where were you ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXVO8ulYLcg
— I was walking around the house. Haven't you noticed that some people look like they've been drunk ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7mX9Zcfou4
— Yes, I met Matt earlier, he reeked of alcohol.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKPeR0qZqSd
— Great, Chad breathes, annoyed. If my parents find out about this, I'm dead.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9r3bimDq8z
I glance in Jessy and Amy’s direction. He has disappeared while she returns to us, blowing : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVe5fvSXmCk
— This guy is weird ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP78d2fkiUc
— What happened with Jessy ? I said, trying to contain my relief.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK6pXt0Kecm
— I don’t know, I was talking to him and, suddenly, he went out to get some fresh air. Who invited him anyway ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ5itKoJnAG
— It's me. We had a class together, I told him it would be the best way to meet people.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhnLSGIEbSo
How nice Chad is ! That's why I love him, my heart reminds me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnCP2HpPXCO
— I’m going to try to find out who brought the alcohol, he continues.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡElAIQgVmrU
— I am coming with you.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDC8M37EzDo
We leave Amy in the living room and head towards the kitchen. A group of American football players, of which Chad is the quarterback, are seated there.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcPFebBIekx
— Damn, you guys are annoying ! I warned you though : no alcohol.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzJ0lm2hGJq
My boyfriend raises his voice.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSO1LzsEFy7
— Relax, Chad, it's just beers.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOJiWG9SsDw
— Beers or not, if my parents find out I'll be in big trouble, get rid of it ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoZJTo6c7z4
The five young people take their bottles while complaining and drop one which spills down the front of my dress.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVcR4roRBHB
— It’s clever ! Chad exclaims as I gape.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrsQDKbPMBG
I grab a roll of paper towels and try to wipe the alcohol off, to no avail.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPk6nz01on4
— Come with me, my boyfriend said, taking me by the hand. I don't mean to be offensive, but you stink of alcohol. We're going to have problems with your parents if you leave like that again.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ29UWBdW26h
— I know, it’s because of your stupid friends ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmw1hjdRx3g
— I'm sorry. I have an idea. Go take a shower, and in the meantime, I'll wash and dry your dress and off you go, neither seen nor known ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR47us79geS
Having little choice, I accept.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUWfdgte2bw
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Several minutes later, which seemed like an eternity, I found Chad in his room. I am in my bathrobe and my boyfriend is holding my clean dress in his hands when there is a knock at the door. Neither of us has time to make a move that Amy and Pearl are already initiating. They stand in the doorway, look at us and mutter an apology before closing the door, giggling.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw93r3YlRUL
— Great, they’re going to think anything now, I mutter angrily.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJYytnDDsvH
— But no, they are your friends. You just need to explain the situation to them when we get down.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡai8PBRT1WQ
I'm not convinced, but Chad is right, they are my friends, they will definitely believe me. And then, I have nothing to reproach myself for.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTvrovc2xR0
Clearly, this evening is far from being the evening I dreamed of ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK3rP5k7YoP
When we join the guests on the ground floor, I immediately feel that they are staring at me with eloquent little smiles. I'm going to pour myself a glass of non alcoholic punch when Amy and Pearl come to talk to me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvRtuEIrTHr
— So, Meg, how was it ? Is Chad as good a shot as he seems ? Amy asks me, with a spark of curiosity in her eyes.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLJq2bcGvDN
— What are you talking about ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡft7RsOuTKX
— Of you and Chad half naked in his room ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzooUuwCDyQ
— That’s not at all what you think ! Nothing happened ! Some idiots had spilled beer on me. I had to take a shower while Chad cleaned my dress and he was dressed in case you didn't notice ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFVs0LpaJAR
It annoys me to have to justify myself as if I had committed a crime.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrB14SFAU0A
— But of course ! Pearl replies, giggling with Amy before walking away towards other students in our class.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMEWn1ukoBg
This story is crazy, and the worst part is that no one wants to believe me, not even my best friends, at least the ones I thought were real friends. The looks that I already found embarrassing became even more insistent, and shame invaded me. It’s a shame to feel this ! Sensing my discomfort, Chad comes to join me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPqUqYY7iPr
— I'm going back.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTCdCpdu4a2
— But no, stay, you're not going to let these idiots ruin your evening ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm6I4uq2Sri
He hugs me tightly to reassure me, but337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWRrPZGzm7m
I gently push him away. There are already enough comments as it is, there is no point in adding more.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFdvEjj33XE
— No, I'm going back. See you tomorrow ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡchpNw38Vdo
Disappointed, he acquiesces. I kiss him on the tips of his lips as we usually do.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdl1aYN7hj1
— You don’t want me to take you home ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡozfJe0lnM4
— I need to walk...337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTdPqTPz3Mx
337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9xp8RgTJne
It feels good to be alone and to be able to enjoy the peace and quiet of the cool night. The moon just makes a crescent in the sky. Looking up, I admire the stars which, far from everything, don't care about the gossip that runs on Earth. Tears burn my eyes, I feel more alone than ever on this Earth which is definitely not running smoothly.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5w4UYsiIVh
— Did you need to get some fresh air ? A soft voice nearby asks, bringing me out of my reverie.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1P5tzTHpUd
Jessy is by my side, looking up to the sky.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5lCSeX8tZj
— Yes. Exactly. You too ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxyrPRPh36i
This is the first time I've seen him up close. Immediately, my heart races. A small diamond shines in his ear, replacing the cross he wore during the day. Two locks frame his forehead, falling in front of his eyes when he lowers his head. I know I shouldn't stare at him like that, but I can't help it. I feel like an insect attracted by a light that hypnotizes it. He looks at me, gives me a smile. Why do I feel so intimidated around him ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0oDReWXXEU
A breath of wind rises, making me shiver. Jessy takes off his black leather jacket and hands it to me, I put it on and thank him. Does he notice my trouble ? I don't know, but from his piercing gaze, I suspect he's enjoying the situation.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyr9zCMpGV7
— Yes, I needed to get some fresh air too, I don’t really like crowds. I saw you leaving, I thought maybe you’d like some company ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSbYi8DYrIi
— If you want, I shrug casually while being happy that he noticed me. Jessy, is that right ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdb1QK0R2Uf
He nods with a smile.
— I'm Meg...
— Megan, I know.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJn1F8gyddk
I look at him, surprised.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUFKA5PHb9f
— Good. What else do you know about me ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp7Nn9id74s
— Let’s see… You’re the best student in class, and you’re dating the star player of the football team.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQ8wrXn4cl
— You're good ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX2EeAlBxHp
— I guess you must have heard something about me too ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjP06SbbGk6
— Not much, actually. I just know that you are seventeen, that you have just arrived in Millisky and that you are repeating your school year.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdZeXt6wGNX
— Everything is true. It's not that serious ? What upsets you..., he adds to my astonishment.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh4HIEsZReV
— No, there are much worse things in life. It's nothing, just nonsense.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEp5ZawYsMM
— If it’s so harmless, then why did you leave your boyfriend’s party ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaJUhg7Hull
— Maybe because, this evening, I saw the true faces of my so called friends. My confidence in them melted like snow in the sun.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY7GPURKZX9
Jessy sighs as she looks up again to look at the starry sky.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEanadZUGFC
— I know this feeling of disappointment well.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjeLoUAxRcC
— Did this happen to you too ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNdjna3o5HS
He seems surprised that I am interested in him and turns to me, burying his hands in the pockets of his pants.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWEIzfpIIiP
— To be betrayed, disappointed ? Oh yes ! Although I don't understand why your friends would turn their backs on you.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRHl9NEK8ZS
— Haven't you heard the gossip spread by Amy and Pearl ? They told everyone that I slept with Chad. Even though I told them that this is not the case, they did not believe me, and worse, they preferred to continue to denigrate me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡba8VRpet7f
As I tell him this, I search his eyes to check if he is sincere or if he is making fun of me like the others.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqpq25VCJ4D
— I have learned to no longer listen, and even less believe, what people say out of pure malice or jealousy. I am convinced that you are telling the truth.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkQyikqnhOr
— You seem very sure of yourself for someone who doesn’t know me ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3KaJ0mBgza
He locks his gaze on mine before responding : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyfIdxPuR9k
— I see in you.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNADOIs3fst
This response leaves me speechless and upsets me more than it should. Faced with him, with his words, I feel lost. Fortunately, we arrived on my street and I just want to be alone to try to analyze what I feel.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP1RKhPrrQP
— Thank you, I said, handing him back his jacket. And thank you for taking me home.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgy6DLaCMB0
— At your service, he says, turning left while I continue straight.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ClqCt25s2
337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5iEoKbByVU
337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHyGqJKaUuU
The following days, nothing erases this attraction which pushes me towards Jessy. This makes me feel so guilty that I try to focus on my relationship with Chad, without really succeeding. As for Jessy, I feel like he's been running away from me since the other night. He looks away as soon as I look at him and doesn't speak to me anymore. I don't know what I did wrong for him to ignore me like that, but it pains me a lot. Perhaps he also ended up believing the nonsense that was circulated about my relationship ? If that were the case, I would be extremely hurt.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFDrULVSmDG
It was during history class that the teacher gave me the opportunity to get closer to him.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3JHO63PSkG
— I asked each of you to write a presentation on the last lesson.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ206OBWgqn8
At these words, several students point to their copy on their table.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9w1T33hM2x
— Jessy, can you pick them up ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfl2d7mWOkj
This one executes. When he reaches my height, his gaze finally anchors on mine. I feel like seconds are becoming minutes. At this very moment, I realize how much I've missed Jessy these past few days. His hand brushes against mine as I hand him my paper, making me want to grab it and never let go.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYrUQEeRl94
As if reading my thoughts, Jessy narrows his eyes slightly and purses his lips. Then he turns away towards the next table, breaking the spell that united us as the professor continues speaking : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1akTO6ykmx
— To find out what you have learned from this course, I have prepared a written quiz for you.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG0UCHLbVFY
Immediately, boos are heard.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVINyYIm0yn
— Yes, I know, I'm not nice. While you answer the questionnaire, I will go through your presentations and form teams of two. For next week, you will have to refine your different points of view, compare them, in order to share them in front of the whole class.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHg9P0nZ2jJ
Although I am a good student, I don't particularly enjoy being on the board in front of everyone else and am already worried about who I will have to work with. As long as it's neither with Amy nor with337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOB57eysxFG
Pearl. I haven't spoken to them since the party at Chad's.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdfxmOmDwZP
They tried to come see me on Monday but I totally ignored them. Even if I find myself alone most of the time, Chad does not share all of my classes, I prefer that to being poorly accompanied.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwb9WTSv19L
For long minutes, I put these thoughts aside to concentrate on the questioning.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQlst2DP3m3
When I finish, I raise my head and look behind me, towards Jessy who finishes a few seconds after me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV6XrKmFNYi
The teacher notices us because he tells us : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl5fBA82Rbl
— Alright. Megan and Jessy, you'll be teaming up next week. You can go.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqu0ZdeOcJq
At the same time, we get up and put our homework on the teacher's desk before leaving the classroom.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSxFqRfmXaN
I thought we were going to be able to discuss this project but already Jessy is quickly moving away.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhBBlM2PHV9
— Jessy, wait ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9FcY7mdsNF
He slows down, but doesn't stop.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvGKeFzMn8J
— We need to discuss how we are going to approach this presentation.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPGsZQhIBIn
His shoulders relax and he exhales.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjFyNlnV0GC
— I don't like working with others. So I suggest you do your part on your own, I will do the same and we will meet again before the next class to compare our points of view.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKsZwCgemYb
— Thank you for your proposal but I refuse. There's no way I'm going to get a bad grade because you're antisocial.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqJzoHHtLE3
— I'm not…337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWm5ZyfKpp5
Before he finishes his sentence, I raise an eyebrow which interrupts him.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxXznCDk2ln
— Okay, maybe I am a little, he admits with a little smile. Alright, you win Megan.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtHA2pZt83r
Feeling like I need to take advantage of my advantage before he changes his mind, I quickly scribble my address on a piece of paper and hand it to him.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4smSMduaS4
— Come to my place at the end of classes, we will be quiet to study.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoX9Irr2oHH
— Thanks for the address but we could just as easily meet up after school and go to your house together.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnyOBsusUGZ
Why didn't I think of that ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC1DxVFwO0F
I refrain from slapping myself.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFK3ZqJvGeo
Embarrassed by my stupidity, I smile shyly. Jessy leans towards me, slips my address into his pocket and adds mischievously : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfHPIghPLX7
— I'm keeping it anyway. You never know, you might get lost along the way.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmvGqLEX3qO
I don't understand why just looking at him, talking to him, puts me in this state. I feel my cheeks on fire and I am certain that when I open my mouth, nothing but nonsense comes out.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDAVZ5ymjGm
But what is happening to me ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0T9QiNiiSP
337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFF2jBx93lZ
During the next class, I feel Chad's gaze, sitting at the desk next to mine, weighing on me suspiciously. I do my best to appear comfortable and innocent until he hands me a paper.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsz0CT5OM6o
What's going on with Jessy ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9xuB2vh9fm
Astonished, I wrote : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtmS0iDTwhP
What ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeTr406JN8O
Chad's response was quick : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFoqGPX4AcN
Amy told me you two seem close and that I should be worried. It's the case ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEvzJ8cURtN
Anger replaces disbelief. What the hell is his problem ? Is she not tired of taking care of my life, of making up stories for me ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAc4ibQEAWV
No, not at all. We just have a presentation to make together. 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVfOtJHELqW
A smile lights up Chad's features. I managed to reassure him, yet I fear I may not have been completely honest with him.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9skXwUxPUF
As I look at his profile, I have to recognize that my boyfriend no longer inspires in me the feelings that inspired me just a few months ago. I feel myself detaching myself from Chad, I come to wonder if I was only in love with him one day or if I have always confused love and friendship. Slipping my hands through my hair, I breathe deeply. The only thing I know for sure is that I am lost in my emotions.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiwolspzJ4Q
337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6MkNAU2Q5W
337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK5eSvLJrRF
At the end of class, Jessy comes to join me, backpack on his shoulder and a book in hand.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTuXj0tdEas
— I love this book. I must have read it about ten times since last year, he tells me. I thought you might like to read it ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIcOxdUdNCg
While walking the streets, I quickly skim a few pages.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi0JyRd94by
— Do you mind if I save it to read tonight ? I'll give it back to you tomorrow.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNyIbrXV6UA
— On the contrary. It’s so rare that I meet people who like to read something other than comics.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Jxj35QVre
— I understand you. Comics are Chad's favorite reading.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAftjq4YYcI
— I'm not surprised, Chad seems more of an athlete than a cerebral one.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoGbc6ITtr5
I am left speechless.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2LeEYGqQCO
— Are you always this frank ? Can't help but ask him.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfxAdqi8bHh
He shrugs his shoulders while responding : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsSw9KN2Gf8
— Very often. I hurt you ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwcMBTxy9LD
I thought for a few seconds before answering him.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgkkyJW7623
— No. I must admit that it is the truth.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa7rQ1Lj3Sr
His smile widens, making me melt a little more.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAB6cF2xXjt
Arriving home, we sit in the living room and chat about the homework we have handed in. We both think we'll get good grades. My mother comes home from work and walks into the living room, surprising us. I suddenly feel uncomfortable being with a boy other than Chad under my parents' roof. I jump up, followed by my guest.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfnaqtdWddw
— Hey, Ch…, it’s not Chad, she smiled.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNRUcbhpUR0
— Mom, this is Jessy.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwAIEnGLvDE
They greet each other.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvMouiFMd1G
— We have a presentation to give to the whole class about the Second World War.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVY8NHZv5DY
With a nod, Jessy confirms my words. Since my mother arrived, he hasn't said a word, and seems intimidated. This adds as evidence : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcqQKfiMx5Y
— Jessy, are you staying to eat with us this evening ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7BMJhWZSwL
He shrugs his shoulders.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdhgj1nfLzH
— I don't want to bother you…337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQel2rqtvf8
— Don't worry, I still cook too much since Nick left for college.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRgeyrPq8eT
— Nicolas is my older brother…337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLEhhE3M2mA
— It would be a pleasure to have you with us. My husband is tired of being surrounded by girls.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeaEUtYeGRG
— Okay then, Jessy said, smiling. Thanks ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡavQl3vpBGl
A little later, he met my father, then Nina. When it was time to sit down at the table, without anyone telling her, Jessy naturally took a seat next to me. I control myself so as not to let my disorder appear in front of those close to me. I feel myself vibrate every time his arm brushes mine. From time to time, Jessy looks at me sideways and gives a little amused smile, and I immediately blush ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDhzdJkDiOX
The meal passes in a good atmosphere until Nina, as usual, says out loud what she is thinking : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡARIas6bwrO
— You're not bad, Jessy, but I prefer Chad. It is awesome ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ83HysAyVcv
— Nina ! We don't say that kind of thing ! Reprimands my mother.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7LGxAieiX6
— For what ? I tell the truth.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs86ibp46lE
— Chad is nice, Jessy responds politely.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP9kBID2F4K
— And he’s strong ! Nina continues, making me want to throw myself over the table and strangle her.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg3P2ytcdg1
— It’s true, Chad is a great athlete, adds my father. He also taught Megan how to drive. Considering the number of guests at his party the other night, he's also very popular. He has everything going for him, this boy, says my father, whom I would like to strangle at the same time as my sister.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj9xPSEeQmR
— It’s true that he’s really lucky, Jessy whispers, looking at me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Dg6EaAoi3
I stare at him, not knowing how to react. I have a sudden and insane desire to throw myself into his arms to kiss him, this idea scares me as much as his words made me happy. Also, I'm left speechless, which makes him smile more.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkAN3UMfRLM
At the end of the meal, Jessy helps me clear the table, then asks me where the bathroom is. I tell him. My mother then approaches me and gives me a little smile.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoCBwPQWOsg
— This boy is very nice, she comments quietly so that only I can hear. And very cute at that.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO0S7DkuTlk
I glance at him sideways, smiling.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFBvovg1MKe
"I suppose you know what you're doing ? "337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9hvc4yshQ2
— Not really.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1zkTrfYXZN
— Meg, you’re sixteen. You didn't make a lifelong commitment to Chad. You are all young, you have the right to be carefree. I was, at your age, and I didn't know your father until much later, when I decided to settle down.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVOu2baqLDd
— You know very well that I am too serious to let myself be guided by my emotions without having first thought for hours.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡydwIYlvJTN
— Yes, I know, my mother sighs. And at first glance, I would say that Jessy seems to be just like you.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPGw6LbpoO7
— You think that…337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeu6FGs5D0B
I want to ask her if she thinks Jessy is interested in me, but I leave it hanging when I see him coming back to us.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaZ6p03ullu
— Thank you very much for inviting me to your table. It's getting late, I'm going to go home.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpy5rSQfrgb
— Wait, I'm going to walk with you for a while.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtaBFAuhgkW
Jessy nods before going to grab his jacket hanging on a hook in the entryway.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzXLxvRq5BH
— Thanks again ! Have a good evening everyone, he says as he leaves.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbeQDlYxety
— Megan ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuP4ubN7Xl5
I turn to my mother who is standing in the hallway, at the entrance to the kitchen.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4R29g4AYpY
— I am sure of it ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMBOVQp9A6L
I give him a big smile.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW4VJCndhhS
— She is sure of what ? Asks Jessy who heard everything from the porch.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ340ecpxVma
— Oh, you're welcome, just something I asked him.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡagUVNsWn4N
Fortunately, he doesn't insist.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvbDcfFckVM
We walk down the sidewalk in silence.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqtEtcPAQuJ
My neighborhood is a quiet place, where all the houses337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh3p3aFcblO
look alike with their little white fence surrounding the garden. Only the colors of the houses vary from one to another, sometimes white with blue shutters, sometimes brown with red shutters. Our family home is cream with green shutters. My father makes a point of maintaining it well, repainting it as soon as the paint shows signs of age, and mowing the lawn regularly. This corner of the city is not known for being the richest, but at least its inhabitants ensure that nothing can damage it. I love this quiet little town which seems to live as if in a cocoon where nothing serious ever happens and where the smallest event, like the arrival of Jessy, is experienced as big news. This thought pulls me out of my reverie and, turning back to my companion, I decide to question him.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGfvC2CE4dh
— Did you move here alone ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2dU1fO6RKn
This seems incongruous to me since he is only seventeen, but I never see him with anyone, not even in town.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwZNbWlLr2P
— No, I live with my mother.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1zu6kE7fQg
— And your father ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpFn3EGkc2V
— My father died when I was a kid.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk2IcvBP9iC
— Sorry.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7FBcItTT3N
— It's nothing. My mother remarried and I have a little brother, Jason, who is now seven.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYPnoegnS10
— So your father in law and your brother live with you ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtW806uX4g3
Jessy grimace. 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDUgTo38AKF
— No, they stayed in Allentown.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMVj8PKQz1b
— For what ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfBTMAJbkoW
Jessy gives me a big smile while answering : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGvjaWr5Y5G
— Joker ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzfaEgoiRPx
Preferring not to insist, I move on to other questions : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDXSioUadBc
— Why did you leave Allentown ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTTB9qUmgkJ
— Re joker ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeEkDu3rI0M
— OK. I always see you alone... but you must have friends ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUpipLzMZLs
— You know, I just arrived and I don’t know anyone yet, except you. In Allentown, I had friends, or so I thought, but..., he interrupts himself, purses his lips, shaking his head : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtLWWixDWpq
— I don't want to talk about it... Let's just say, sometimes you think you know people and you're wrong.
— Like me the other night...337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWn2sLlIamq
Looking serious, he nods.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy9mBTcxB15
— So you’re from Allentown ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI7P8WUdHZN
— Yes, I lived in a small neighborhood where everyone had known each other forever, a bit like this one. (He looks around.) Except that in town, we couldn't see the stars as well.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpUKjVRbKVv
I follow his gaze, staring at the sky illuminated by hundreds of sparkling points that no cloud hides. I feel very small and fragile in the face of this immensity. It's strange to find myself next to this boy to whom I feel close and who, at the same time, intimidates me so much.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfuiSOYHy0o
— Your family loves Chad very much, he said suddenly, breaking this magical moment. How long have you been together ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcxz9iexOvF
I sit on the low wall bordering a house for sale.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6ZZbA6mCw5
— My father was a big athlete in high school and I think he recognizes himself in Chad. My mother finds him cute and nice, and my sister is in love with him, I think ! (I smile.) He and I have known each other for a very long time, since kindergarten in fact…337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmUS4KyyiLT
— And you’ve always loved him, Jessy adds, sitting down next to me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDnk6K3T4LB
I blush and lower my head.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNoRe6UUKHn
— It’s complicated… But let’s talk about you instead. Did you leave a girlfriend in Allentown ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJIA0tExgaC
Jessy turns to me and raises his eyebrows, visibly surprised. I stare at him, both impatient and dreading his answer.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBRzgE2lQiE
— Your question is strange...
— Why ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu2bPleFY98
— Because you're dating the perfect guy according to everyone around you, so I wonder what your questioning is hiding.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAlBZkpOdcT
— It wasn’t you who told me that you shouldn’t necessarily listen to what others say ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdiukOfk30i
— Touché, he smiled. Let's say I had a girlfriend.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeKlqC68gLL
— You still have ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUiXrNIr0R7
— Well no, we split up...337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBaDrH37nsE
I don't give him time to finish his sentence as my lips are already on his. Immediately, he kisses me back.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxZZx1eaTxi
His lips are soft and warm on mine, I feel him slide a hand to my waist, pulling me closer to him until, as suddenly as it began, he pushes me back forcefully before standing up abruptly. jump, visibly annoyed.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPOmyhla1Ut
— That’s not true ! Why did you do it ? He writes to himself while standing in front of me, hands on hips waiting for a response.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0hlAHzE2Tu
— I don’t know, I said as sincerely as possible. Since I met you, I have felt lost. I don't know why but I feel like I've known you forever and this feeling totally upsets me. I was hoping you felt the same way I did.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtHTwwSPl9G
Far from calming down, Jessy walks away from me, walking as quickly as he can. I get up and run after him.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXGETCV2xdX
— Jessy, wait ! What is happening ? Please don't tell me that kiss was that bad ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwSkjrZh8UZ
He doesn't stop though. I grab him by one arm, forcing him to stop his way.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo4LC4xsPfo
He glares at me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVupjf8Anip
— I'm sorry if... I shouldn't have kissed you, but I honestly thought you wanted to too.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBrVw74y8It
— It is, he whispers, staring at me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiaLH671Ac9
— So where is the problem ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxFkizGMjA5
— I can not do that.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMkfdxgJpH0
— But why ? I know that compared to Chad it's a bad thing but...337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbDfr3Gt5qf
— It has nothing to do with him. The problem is me. I'm not made for love, he gets angry again. I gave too much, now that is forbidden to me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7soeRXHOJ8
He frees himself from my hand before continuing on his way. Staying there, I say to him : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmV30d3gMjp
— I don't understand ! You can't pretend to want to kiss me and then run away like that a second later. It's not me who made you suffer so why should I pay for what others made you endure ? I'm not your ex ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnyXR8ixoDS
Abruptly, he stops his running, turns around before coming back towards me. His features are distorted by anger but I also read a form of pain there.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtTObvU2AJk
— No, you are not the one who changed my life and I in no way wish to become the one who changes yours in the same way ! My life is ruined Meg, I'm already at the end. I'm going to die, he adds when he sees that I don't understand his words.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvxBOzlqyl8
— Wh... What ? I stammer, in shock.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTOAALjD3D6
He gets closer. His face is only a few centimeters from mine.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡU4QSOwnQ3I
— Meg, I'm HIV positive. I have the AIDS virus, he admits quietly so that no one else can hear him, although the street is deserted. So stay away from me, believe me it's better ! 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrZLnbUScNF
He leaves as quickly as possible. Soon night envelops it completely. For a long moment, I stay there, dismayed, unable to make the slightest gesture, no longer knowing what to think. His words seem to spin in my head like a wild merry go round that no one can stop. I don't know how long I stand on that sidewalk looking in his direction long after he's gone.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡatxrKNvcmB
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When I get home, I try not to let anything show and lock myself in the kitchen. I thought I would be safe, but as soon as I closed the door, my mother opened it and stuck her head in.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaUmkEFPixQ
— Are you okay, Meg ? You're very pale, aren't you sick ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxCJlfZ3WLg
— Everything is fine. I miss Nicolas, I would like to talk to him.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH6a1twrd2P
Understanding the message, my mother nods and closes the door behind her. Immediately, I grab the phone and dial my brother’s number. Luckily he answers after two rings.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPRHcDSVbJk
— Hello ? he says, happily.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdONgtJQzC0
— Nick, it’s me.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1gUQVw9gz6
I'm having a hard time keeping the tremors in my voice at bay.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9hXZfhOEif
— Meg, what’s going on ? He worries.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiXK9qbIFQv
The day I met Jessy, I told my brother that same evening. He seemed happy that a boy other than Chad was messing with me. For some reason, Nick always grimaced at my relationship with Chad. 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1RulHIXbi4
— Jessy came to the house for dinner this evening... 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoQ1mg0kxY5
— Oh, he sighs, he threw you away.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnh3RMbKLHS
I think about the way I kissed him and feel myself blushing again. If I had known how he was going to push me away, I would never have let myself be carried away by my desire.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoKDgnGqK1l
— Yes, but that’s not the worst, I sob. Jessy admitted to me that she was sick.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD8S745ycbK
Realizing the horror of the situation, I fall to the ground. I am not afraid of AIDS, I know that I risk nothing. But I am terrified for Jessy, for his future which is likely to be short. My brother doesn't speak, he gives me time to calm down. When my sobs dry up, I continue : 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM4n3wLdsF2
— Jessy is HIV positive, I blurt out in one breath.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7rQSFeMwl3
A gasp of surprise escapes my brother.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSLRdNz8CMx
— Okay, he breathes, making me understand that he’s thinking about the situation. What are you going to do ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡReccKjrKdZ
— I don't know. Nick, I need to know your opinion.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIK0E5lLZYy
— I admit that I didn't expect that at all. Do you see yourself turning your back on him ? 337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJcgBXgE6vj
— I wouldn't be able to.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBOCulNEQWT
— Meg, I know this probably isn't the kind of relationship you imagined, but based on what you've told me so far about this guy, I think right now he especially needs support and friendship. Don’t reject him because he doesn’t match your ideal.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡirzKS9mLHN
— Exactly, he corresponds to my ideal and the fact that he is ill changes nothing. If I am devastated it is because AIDS is an incurable disease. I don't want him to die, Nick, I'm crying again.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzntB16cZn0
I am aware that I have only known him for a short time but, without being able to explain it, he has already marked my existence.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOSs4XNr4ak
— Come on, little sister, don’t cry. For now, Jessy is alive and, even if he keeps you at a distance, I'm sure he would be happy to have you in his life. Try to make him smile while he's here. He must need to think about something other than this crap.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw6X1NRJdjp
— You're right. Nick, what I confided to you must absolutely remain between us. No one should know.337Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNdggKH487r
— Finally you know me ! Come on now tell me how he dumped you ! He laughs as I bite my lip in shame.
