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For long minutes, I stroke Jessy's wet hair, trying to soothe his pain, his fears. When he straightens his face, he seems ashamed to have cried in my arms. Delicately, I wipe away his last tears, surprised that he lets me do it, and smile at him to reassure him.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvXbJQk989C
We set off on our way back in torrential rain, yet we walk peacefully, savoring the fact of being together. I don't care if it rains as long as I'm with him.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeCBl5hIGhi
— Anyway, we're already soaked, I answer Jessy when he asks me if I want to run to get to his house faster. It'll be OK ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTDJ9k49bsD
— Yeah, I think so.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEMFZaynfpV
— Jessy, please promise me you’ll never let yourself fall into the void like that again. I got the fright of my life.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPxyCy41xlL
Hands in his pockets, he shrugs his shoulders and breathes deeply before telling me : 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRMj6MAJpVV
— Promise. Why do you care about me so much ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGCkyQXhVcG
His question makes my heart beat faster. I'm not ready to tell him the feelings he inspires in me. I have to analyze them first and try to find out what he feels. So even though I feel my cheeks turning pink, I answer him evasively.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcSqmmeN87b
— Why not ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7aa6UfMyVo
— When people learn about AIDS, they turn their backs on me. This is why my mother and I came to live here. Even my father-in-law couldn't stand me living under his roof anymore.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWG81mVSeJo
— There are morons everywhere, I whisper. Jessy, I like you. I'm not going to start ignoring you because you have a health problem.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKxE0DRHQpS
— Thank you, he murmurs, pursing his lips. I'm sorry for everything I said to you. I didn't mean to be so rude.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyP2d1kr9ZB
His unexpected apology really makes me happy. When Jessy stops telling me off, I see in him the boy I had guessed at first glance : A good guy to whom difficult things happen. I think that's why he always tries to show an angry face, he has suffered so much that he doesn't want people to perceive his fragility.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIwMWQ8GZPS
— It's forgotten. By the way, I met your mother. She seems very nice.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡogP2bTukBI
Despite our slow walk, we already arrive in front of his house.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsweDHvYcpH
— She is. Do you want me to take you home ? I can borrow his car.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ECqkmXzNS
— No, it is going to be fine. I don't want to get the seats soggy, I smile. See you tomorrow ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyDpGqca9Px
I am happy to see him nod with a big smile. And as I walk away, I realize I've never been closer to him than I am tonight.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBdKanzj4LS
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It's almost 11 p.m. when I get home, completely soaked. My parents are waiting for me, impatient and worried.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn6LMaYq7wP
— Finally, here you are, my father roared. Look at you, you're good at wringing ! 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK3YWOjkNPU
— Were you with Jessy ? My mother asks in her usual soft voice.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcVKjT6mg1p
I nod, shivering from the cold.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdr4EA9xibk
— We spoke with Mrs. Sutter at the meeting. She told us that her son had been missing for hours and that she had no idea where he might be. She was very worried about him, my father told me.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPdfmLNO9c6
— He went back home. How did the meeting go ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP4vnadG9b2
— Start by drying off, we'll tell you later.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhjRKQDcb3L
I head into the bathroom where I warm up quickly and quickly put on my pajamas, as well as a warm dressing gown, as I can't wait to see how the evening unfolds. I find my parents in the living room, where everyone, in an armchair, drinks coffee while waiting for me.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJMXtVlJH3Z
— So how did it go ? I said, sitting across from them on the couch.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiUbnbh0kD7
— Difficult to say, my father grimaces. The principal had asked a doctor to come and answer the parents' questions. It calmed some when he assured their children were not at risk of breathing the same air as Jessy or touching him. But other parents are obtuse and want him to be expelled at all costs. They are simply scared to death, to the point of not understanding that AIDS is not caught like that.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbjbGHszoSn
— Mrs. Sutter spoke, saying how much she loves her son and that there is no risk in sharing his life since she has been doing it for a year without problem, my mother added. She is a very dignified and courageous woman. She told us you came to see her.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2RubGpBHD7
— Indeed, I was looking for Jessy.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzIH843a0fP
— Nina told us that you went looking for him after Chad’s visit. Did you find it ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWn2eBawv8x
— Yes, and as far as you know, it’s over between Chad and me.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsaW093wIyI
Contrary to what I thought, my father doesn't seem surprised. My mother must have already told him about it. However, I don't like the look they exchange before my mother asks me : 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs6qMas4Cwm
— Because of Jessy ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡomc8ZbmWeH
— Yes and no. Jessy and I are friends. But let’s say that meeting him allowed me to open my eyes to Chad and his little world. I realized that, contrary to what I believed, I am not in love with him. I like him a lot but in a friendly way.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhEjx9CcYWe
Once again my parents exchange this strange look which seems to mean that they are not at the end of their trouble with me.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0KVdH3LCV3
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The next morning, when I arrived near the school, I saw Jessy waiting outside on the sidewalk.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFbj8AQkPfA
— Hi, how are you ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1R8A1AX0f9
He puts a hand to his heart.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmMU2Ls5c9H
— Oh, you scared me ! 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4fjRdcN63n
I burst out laughing.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡekLsp9z4LO
— That’s for the scare you gave me last night ! 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl8bsN3hl3L
— It’s fair game, he smiled.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrZaMNJ05HM
He stares at the large white building without taking a step towards it. Since I stayed in his arms the day before for several minutes, he no longer intimidates me as much, and this impression of knowing him for a long time has strengthened. I saw his fragility behind his anger, I saw his despair, but also his strength.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbTnEvsKLm7
— Are you planning to come to class today ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbvkwAoyVml
— I don't know. After what happened yesterday...and then this meeting.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUkGPmhUeFm
He huffs and then purses his lips, visibly uncomfortable.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXsfIL1rGwj
— Did your mother tell you ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgc8XO5vlhF
— Yes, apparently the parents can't do anything against me, but there is always the possibility that they will contact the academy and file a complaint to have me fired. In fact, I wonder if it wouldn't be better if I gave up... 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbuGIVUqK35
— No way ! 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD4V11busyO
Jessy looks at me, surprised.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO6xCbpUuy5
— We'll go together and everything will go well, you'll see.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbsFhOud17a
— There are looks that are sometimes hard to bear, he admits to me.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdmR0f7BAnt
However, I notice that he accompanies me towards high school.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr9aTRj4M0r
— I believe that, unfortunately, you can never please everyone, so give a chance to know you to those who want it and forget the morons.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3KvslA18aX
We enter the main hallway, students turn to look at us as I continue talking so that he focuses more on my voice than on the eyes focused on him.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgQvBy4Aab1
— With time, there will be those who will realize who you really are and they will come to you, as for those who continue to criticize you, act as if they don't exist. They're the idiots, not you.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjR2RpXO7er
I meet the gaze of a tall guy, named Tyler, who grimaces when he hears me.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm5KhmNivw8
— Yes, complete idiots, I said again in a louder voice.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdudbcX1ef9
Jessy gives me a grateful smile.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfbcMc0kebv
— Oh, it’s getting bad, he murmurs.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSDBCxeHJgd
I follow his gaze and see Chad striding towards us. He stands in front of Jessy and, after a few seconds of hesitation, offers his hand.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlvvTFHJdT2
— I'm sorry for yesterday. For the fight…and everything else. I should never have listened to your conversation and above all I should never have repeated his secret. I'm really sorry.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3iHeAqpiRI
Jessy hesitates for a few seconds then squeezes his hand, nodding.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPIyKYgzrwx
— Thanks.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8bzVtJbZpt
His eyes move from Jessy to me, he doesn't seem to know how to behave around me anymore.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFBr2FdydsF
Around us, several students observe the scene. Chad is the most popular boy in school and I suspect that after this reconciling handshake, the attitude of some people will change.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsKJDADPK3P
He taps Jessy on the shoulder and says — See you later and walks away.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡawYGi84fzo
— It’s weird that Chad came to apologize. Did you ask him to do it ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOfJCZgiPjc
— No, he did it alone, but you know, he’s like that. He is impulsive, but quickly regrets his outbursts... I feel, more than I see, Jessy looking at me in profile.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ626NYGEOmH
— What ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqzNZEPjgGY
I turn my head towards him.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVWyqoCwdLf
— Why did you break up ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNq2TgyS2yg
— We are too different.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuEFoNLKuqC
I shrug my shoulders as if it were obvious.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1AmiElIr0b
— And are you okay ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZyV6STqI3t
I see in his eyes that he really cares about me, it warms my heart.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK31LmYbPrP
— Alright.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKWpiyZPuDv
A small smile appears at the corners of his lips.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡciStM8aoOu
— I know you don't like Chad very much, but erase that little smug look. (I smile in turn as the bell rings for the start of classes.) We're going to be late, come on.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6qyv8YBkEa
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In the days that followed, things calmed down at the school. I can't say that Jessy goes unnoticed, but he is seen less as an outcast, which is already a small victory. At school, I was always the model student, collecting good grades. The super serious girl who has the teachers on her side. When I dated Chad, who is the most popular guy, I became popular and other girls tended to take their cues from me. So, even if there are a few who look away and whisper as she passes, most of the students are starting to accept Jessy. Since the evening on the bridge, we have spent a lot of time together. I prefer to be with him rather than with my pseudo friends : Pearl and especially Amy, who has turned her back on me since Chad and I separated.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVVQYHrBDw4
Jessy has become my best friend. I can talk to him about everything without being afraid that he will judge me; however, he always gives me his honest opinion.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSV5EhgrmCE
Jessy lived surrounded by family and friends before learning of his HIV status, but he told me that when those close to him learned of his illness, everyone turned their backs on him and, overnight, he found himself abandoned. Only his mother remained near him. By moving to Millisky where Mrs. Sutter found a job as a secretary in a bank, she hoped that her son would finally be able to return to a normal life.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1dBcwgPhbE
The more I get to know him and the less I want this solitary life for him, it's like a kind of mission that I have set for myself. I may not be able to save him, but I can make him smile again. Also, I force him to accompany me to the cinema, to the theater, to fast food. Jessy complains, protests, sometimes drags his feet, but in the end, I always make him give in.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkxqQo4gWQt
— You've lived locked up enough like that ! » is my key phrase to convince him.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj1qpjTaBCR
He then rolls his eyes, huffing in exasperation while his cross— shaped earring swings to the rhythm of his breathing. Finally, he looks at me with a little smile which alone symbolizes my victory.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsEC3VhJcW2
I am myself with him. We have a lot of tastes in common, we laugh at the same jokes, we talk about everything and nothing without ever getting tired of it. And when I'm not with him, he haunts my mind. He is the first person I think of in the morning when I wake up and the last in the evening before I go to sleep. In a few weeks, it has invaded my life and I hope more than anything that it continues as long as possible.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvOIE6BHLL5
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— Hello Mrs. Sutter, are you well ? I say happily as I enter the living room, accompanied by Jessy.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbrWcI8Zeok
Over the past few weeks, I've been spending so much time at the Sutters' that it feels like my second home. I really like Jessy's mother. Just by his look, we perceive his kindness and his strength. I am always welcome at their home and even though Jessy can come to my house whenever he wants, I understand that he is more comfortable in his environment.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzxJkc5dXI1
— Good Meg and you ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUOvgcwknCR
— I’m fine.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF7Y86aVEyg
Elise gets up while Jessy goes to turn on the television.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI9UFWW4Osc
— What movie are you going to watch ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXFkUOV3hWz
— Ghost ! With a big smile, I show the video tape I brought, asking him : Are you staying to watch it with us ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWPFTUS0xmV
— Unfortunately, I can't. I have not finished completing a loan application for a client. I’m going to go lock myself in my room with this file, she sighs.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVOn6OWevth
— Good luck, Mrs Sutter. 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKQzUCifKa1
She takes a few steps away before turning back to me.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9MkVlolSLm
— Meg, for the hundredth time, call me Elise.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLewI32G8Sr
— I'll try, I promise.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbwDiXKDlLO
His mother leaves the room, leaving us alone.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbl9qDU1Epr
— Pop corn ? Jessy asks me. I only have salty, I don't like sweet.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZ1pwEGyxd
— That suits me very well.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBFjBNuAi4w
Once the popcorn is in a large bowl, we sit on the sofa in front of the television. Almost two hours later, I overcame my fear that he would send me away for daring to lean my head on Jessy's shoulder. To my great relief, he just smiled as he continued to watch the film. Now that it is ending, I can no longer contain my emotion and shed many tears.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7DepwobhlL
— Don’t make fun, I said, seeing him laugh discreetly.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0kD9Hl0yCk
I stand up and stretch before wiping my eyes.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCfkkE5ZmG6
— Patrick Swayze is too sexy, I comment.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡftCZV351BY
— Demi Moore is not to be outdone, he sighs, lowering his head.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3YrERshJVz
He suddenly seems sad, which worries me.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtoTmsomiuz
— Isn't that okay ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaaJXZhm0Tc
— Yes, it’s just that… Do you believe that the afterlife exists ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwb1oGDI3KV
Still sitting on the couch, I turn to him.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQHFsLqq4vl
— I think yes. However, I don't know if it's like in this movie.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJL8m9i0E8u
He adopts the same position as me, we find ourselves face to face.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTeVI1TOyF8
— If that’s the case, I’ll make sure to let you know when I get there.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡONkfnXnCEp
I wasn't expecting this response which took me completely by surprise. New uncontrollable tears flood my face. Reality suddenly reminds me. When I am with Jessy, I forget his illness because he is him, the boy I love with all my heart even if he knows nothing about my feelings. But there, faced with the virus, I find myself facing its imminent death. It’s a horrible thing that I try not to think about, as if that could prevent it from happening. I know this is stupid and despite all my efforts, AIDS still remains in the back of my mind. But hearing Jessy talk about his departure is upsetting. I would love to tell him that I am in love with him and that he has no right to leave me, ever. However, this is one of the subjects that I cannot discuss with him as I am sure that he would send me away again. He needs support, so I'm content to be his friend, secretly hoping that one day he'll realize that I mean more to him.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw590fs57PT
— What do you have ? He is surprised.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgt3cn4v3V7
— I don't want you to die Jessy ! 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYFzapbVb5D
I burst into tears as I threw myself on his neck. Immediately, he hugs me back.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsq5l76MFzT
— Don’t cry, he whispers in my ear. I don't like seeing you sad.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1Rb5ERf72O
His heart beating wildly against my chest reminds me that he is still very much alive and that as long as that is the case, we must not lose hope.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqqnJvoVVbM
Staring at him, I detach myself from him.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqvW1H4bHHn
— You're going to fight to stay alive, aren't you ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzeJ2AkZVm4
He strokes a lock of my hair that falls to the side of his face while observing me attentively. He seems to weigh the weight of his words.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuYTpPHUUgU
Finally, he nods in agreement.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeBYs37CIXP
— I have confidence in the future and in medicine. They will find a cure, it’s just a matter of time, I resume with confidence.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmh5OSYNQJu
— Meg, we've already talked about this. You can't save me.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJKvYTXupl
He lowers his head but I have time to see his eyes fill with tears.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBUNKj7vPh7
— I know... For the moment, but I can keep hope, I smile, wiping away the last tears that linger on my cheeks.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpXMA1W9TPv
Mrs. Sutter enters the room at this moment, breaking our moment of complicity.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjObwssv22n
— Megan, are you crying ? She worries, looking at us in turn. And you too ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNQT4RGXiVI
Jessy and I exchange a look before bursting out laughing under the surprised gaze of Elise.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz4xnB3wBmy
— I’m going to go home, I announce, leaving the sofa.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡId26zeR4st
— I'll take you back.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhzzUqmV9F8
— No, it is going to be fine. I need to get some fresh air.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTBgcmxorlQ
Above all, I need to expel from my body this disorder that I am trying to control, and also to silence my fears about its future. Kindly, he will get me my coat. After putting it on, I turn to him and take him in my arms. For a few more seconds, I want to feel him against me.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHq5PbXRoy1
— Do me a favor, hold on to life, I whisper in his ear.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkloKRA8nXE
Emu, he acquiesced.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm5AwPZmzAp
When I leave the warmth of his arms, I see Elise watching us from the kitchen, she wears a little knowing smile, which makes me understand that she knows perfectly well how I feel about her son.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXB9WApPvjM
— Good night, see you tomorrow ! I throw before going out.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfouHwFDbjI
I take a few steps while staring at the dark sky, inside I promise myself to do everything to save Jessy's life.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWdQ6EqgLzq
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Since Jessy stubbornly refuses to tell me about his virus, during the days that follow, I go around bookstores looking for medical journals. At that time, when AIDS was terrifying the population, I had hoped to learn more, unfortunately the articles were still rare and the possible treatments even more so. Everyone repeats the instructions to follow in order not to be contaminated but none of them informs me about the solutions to overcome this cursed disease.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrOY4pFsfAV
— What is all this ? My mother asks me when I return home, my arms full of magazines and books.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNHjxuGdpnQ
— I'm finding out about AIDS, I admit, placing my load on the kitchen table.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSLXkQx4KTI
— Meg, I know you care about Jessy but... Don't waste your life for him.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz0pizRYmRq
My mother's words felt like a stab to the heart.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNU5mehOpiH
— That's not what I meant, she continues, realizing my fear.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrGvSB1t7Yo
Hand on her forehead, she shakes her head as I grab my books again, determined to put an end to this discussion.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7fiR16jv9c
— Megan, you are 16 years old, you have your whole life ahead of you.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBI4dkldWtC
— And not Jessy, right ? ! I get angry.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMCvvs9wiAY
My mother looks down.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJzATR2r9Sq
— That's not what I said. I just think you're too young to have all these worries. You should be able to enjoy your teenage years completely carefree.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcGkTmSZr30
— I would have liked it too, Mom, believe me I would have preferred that Jessy wasn’t sick. But he is and if I can help him in any way I will be there for him. I realize there's not much I can do, however, maybe one of these books will talk about a treatment and I can tell Jessy about it.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQSjMM2kN1Y
My mother nods weakly.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6okBq75FtI
— I just ask you to be careful. Don't get too involved.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaHMnTCbXSY
— It's already too late for that, I emphasize. If it was Dad who was sick, wouldn't you do what you could to help him ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ872EZSbBoJ
I turn on my heel, ready to leave the room when my mother asks me : 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg5lQ7JSCag
— You love him, don’t you ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡILzqT0SDMR
I don't answer. I lock my gaze on my mother's, trying to make her understand all the feelings that are inside me.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj6brSDyYHm
— Please don’t tell Jessy about these books, I ask her before going out.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNANP6gTEGG
273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7xUxqIPhLp
273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjEtGhpwtpU
— Good evening, Megan, Mrs. Sutter calls me from the kitchen when I arrive at their house.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHuL12KALrl
— Good evening.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsJQkyNCfjj
— Jessy hasn’t come home yet.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCmxBS388DB
I look up at his mother with worried eyes. It's 8 p.m., classes ended several hours ago.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlOAUwGIslB
— Don’t worry, she reassures me. You know that his doctor advised him to go to the AIDS center, there was a meeting this evening. He had no desire to go, but I think it will do him good to talk to people who are going through the same thing as him.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGGzY1tfkUp
— Did he leave there complaining ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeuYui8LY4w
— You know him well enough to know that he complains a lot, she said, smiling.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTcsCxFq5i2
— When he is with me, he is rather...273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAUCxLi62Ys
Hearing the front door open, I don't finish my sentence.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuysa3HtOgr
— Yes, but you are special to him, Elise whispers to me.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtxz5hmWSfj
I remain speechless, wondering what she means by that.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjlSLU060Mz
— Sorry to be late.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVsqnDufcLU
Jessy's face is tense, he seems upset. The evening could be long if he remains in this state of mind.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZrO1418y2I
— How was it ? His mother immediately questions him.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpoFCTrsBgq
Jessy glances at me quickly before responding coldly : 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdjpryEZd23
— I don't want to talk about it.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMOnW8Zdx9o
Mrs. Sutter looks at us in turn before announcing that she is going to watch television in her room so that we can watch the screen in the living room. Jessy walks around the bar and goes to help herself to some fruit juice.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOAC2aDBPvQ
— You want some ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Mm3nZC4jo
His tone is less cold, but still full of anger that he tries to contain.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4zfrGzJEw7
— Yes, thanks.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH4ImFKR0Sm
He purses his lips before asking me : 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjTSIrEOX4o
— What movie did you bring this evening ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZPb4mCQbW1
The week before, I had brought the filmGhost which caused us both to end up in tears. This time, I chose to take a lighter one, but still with my favorite actor. Proudly, I take the video tape out of my backpack and show it to him.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbYBzhFCMis
— Dirty Dancing ! 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUpbGQzPg6F
He rolls his eyes, but I sense that he is holding back a smile.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUGKVAMaWNs
— You and your Patrick Swayze ! I know you think he's the most handsome guy in the world, but your obsession with him is starting to turn into an obsession.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8bJCQeIFQn
I pretend to look shocked, which makes him laugh.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp4gTJs71oZ
— It’s true that he’s hot, but in my ranking of the most handsome guys, he only occupies second place.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUvL9suxRyk
— Oh, my God, he whispers with a hint of despair. Which other actor are you planning to pester me with when you're done making me watch all his films ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7zvX5tdH6W
Jessy sighs, making a face. His good mood has returned, which makes me happy. I don't want to ask him about the meeting; If he wants to talk to me about it, he will do it alone. I just want to take his mind off things and see him smile. I get up to turn on the VCR while he puts away the bottle of orange juice.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeJ2aCkesZR
— No others, I promise. For me, the hottest guy isn't an actor.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIAqHF54Twc
— Ah good ? Who is it ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4C0PyVP4qk
He comes to join me on the sofa, frowning.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmiuyHXqe6S
— He’s someone I see every day.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVeghohFDQL
The movie starts and I shut up. Out of the corner of my eye, I see my friend racking his brain to figure out who I'm talking about.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdsQkkzCjRc
— Your father ? he asks after a few minutes.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhmTBCkyhW4
Without taking my eyes off the screen, I shake my head and smile. It amuses me to see him searching.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2SFRvvGayA
— Someone from high school ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr4OA5AJ66O
J'acquiesce273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhrdE0n4KwB
— Chad ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu3MalRth1t
A hint of anger and disbelief filters into his voice.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡThJsttSCds
— No. Jessy, do you want to watch the movie or tell me all the names of the guys at school ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS2AfCz5IM3
— Sorry, but no matter how hard I look, I can’t see who…273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd1NadHGbOQ
— It's you.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVHRJN7vK5F
I didn't mean to tell him, it just came out, and now I feel myself blushing as I keep my eyes glued to the television. The words have barely passed my lips before Jessy chokes on swallowing and starts coughing. He gets up to go drink some water.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD4az8RSk9E
— Well, that makes you feel, I said mockingly, pausing the movie.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhYkAavFVtD
— You got me, he says from the kitchen.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNVfW1qxD8t
I turn around on the couch to look at him.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd3Lg0SFfyd
— It’s the truth, Jessy, I’m not making you walk.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl848Ef3QTr
He comes back to sit next to me on the sofa. His cheeks are red as he places a kiss on my forehead.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKX4R0esJrM
— It’s nice of you to try to cheer me up. I love you.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtiRYeYXGXM
That's not what I'm trying to do, I really mean it, yet my heart immediately races : he adores me. 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz9H6KiCtWA
— Is it true ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡivNdCJWAfs
— Of course. You're my best friend, Meg.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPAcWQaIIqm
Oh… Friend ? My heart calms down quickly.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSdGxg89V6o
— Aren’t you in good spirits ? Is it because of the meeting ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJDvz02p2TJ
Your mother told me about it, I add in front of his frown.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY6ytiP54Hp
— Yeah… it was depressing. Hearing all these patients talk about their fears… it brought me back to my own.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFGvHBjBjAt
— Did you speak with them ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvHRFfVLcZP
— No, I listened to them. It’s strange to arrive in this center where I don’t know anyone and where they invite me to confide.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrlrBI2mTTA
— If you want, next time, can I accompany you ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKLtXBkzrjU
I suggest, but I already know the answer.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF7G8UywhNU
— Non ! 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfEtgUTuSAS
His tone is harsher than I thought. However, he softens very quickly.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5NG3zRp2TP
— That’s nice, but no. I don't want you to come into this part of my life.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy6QpmUxadG
— For what ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPeH1cqZYqT
Anger reappears in his eyes, he lowers his head.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmozN3QSh4N
— Because you are too important to me for me to drag you into this world of illness with me.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlejkeI5R3c
— Jessy… 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH3k0a0xd4a
— No, Meg. I'm willing to give in when you force my hand to leave this house, but when it comes to AIDS, I won't change my mind, he said firmly, turning his gaze back to the television.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWBgqxyViPT
— OK as you want.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvltZSko4Ur
I sigh as he resumes playing the movie. After a few minutes of silence, he glances at me and whispers : 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2ADCjyxHdm
— Are you mad at me ? 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUimViIPzyO
I can't help but smile and lean my head on his shoulder like I've gotten used to doing when we watch movies together.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlUXzt9nhh1
— No, it’s your choice.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRsgDoq9IXX
He places another kiss on my forehead. I whisper to him without taking my eyes off Patrick Swayze : 273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfOZPLYqvm5
— Me too, I like you.273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF2v9jVREWF
273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdWUl3RDmHD
273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW5dYbFoqBV
273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwevnpVBMxt
273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw0hdCFBL44
273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtlighsskuf
273Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaeN1MjOMx9
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