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For long minutes, I stroke Jessy's wet hair, trying to soothe his pain, his fears. When he straightens his face, he seems ashamed to have cried in my arms. Delicately, I wipe away his last tears, surprised that he lets me do it, and smile at him to reassure him.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfEc8auwBph
We set off on our way back in torrential rain, yet we walk peacefully, savoring the fact of being together. I don't care if it rains as long as I'm with him.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ78zSmADPXY
— Anyway, we're already soaked, I answer Jessy when he asks me if I want to run to get to his house faster. It'll be OK ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqdZ04VXCbP
— Yeah, I think so.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmTcJspkdv7
— Jessy, please promise me you’ll never let yourself fall into the void like that again. I got the fright of my life.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9Qm9jKS8BM
Hands in his pockets, he shrugs his shoulders and breathes deeply before telling me : 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeAor7Qigo7
— Promise. Why do you care about me so much ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYj9rROSJMH
His question makes my heart beat faster. I'm not ready to tell him the feelings he inspires in me. I have to analyze them first and try to find out what he feels. So even though I feel my cheeks turning pink, I answer him evasively.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa2vrFfNAIM
— Why not ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4VoNBFzZeY
— When people learn about AIDS, they turn their backs on me. This is why my mother and I came to live here. Even my father-in-law couldn't stand me living under his roof anymore.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX0o9jbOYz6
— There are morons everywhere, I whisper. Jessy, I like you. I'm not going to start ignoring you because you have a health problem.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ87cnvNJC23
— Thank you, he murmurs, pursing his lips. I'm sorry for everything I said to you. I didn't mean to be so rude.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoeLImxHgVj
His unexpected apology really makes me happy. When Jessy stops telling me off, I see in him the boy I had guessed at first glance : A good guy to whom difficult things happen. I think that's why he always tries to show an angry face, he has suffered so much that he doesn't want people to perceive his fragility.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkvRoBSTnGf
— It's forgotten. By the way, I met your mother. She seems very nice.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ02g72priXH
Despite our slow walk, we already arrive in front of his house.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYaffHJNco6
— She is. Do you want me to take you home ? I can borrow his car.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4YDPQMm8wW
— No, it is going to be fine. I don't want to get the seats soggy, I smile. See you tomorrow ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhHT4RrVWDI
I am happy to see him nod with a big smile. And as I walk away, I realize I've never been closer to him than I am tonight.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJ9GqVZ9F9
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It's almost 11 p.m. when I get home, completely soaked. My parents are waiting for me, impatient and worried.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2mYo9KFj8b
— Finally, here you are, my father roared. Look at you, you're good at wringing ! 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrndnmuZ39t
— Were you with Jessy ? My mother asks in her usual soft voice.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkidZehXGax
I nod, shivering from the cold.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAbjT8ObmfX
— We spoke with Mrs. Sutter at the meeting. She told us that her son had been missing for hours and that she had no idea where he might be. She was very worried about him, my father told me.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ66kpozJei
— He went back home. How did the meeting go ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFJIgFtEwGN
— Start by drying off, we'll tell you later.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhJqbVSeEds
I head into the bathroom where I warm up quickly and quickly put on my pajamas, as well as a warm dressing gown, as I can't wait to see how the evening unfolds. I find my parents in the living room, where everyone, in an armchair, drinks coffee while waiting for me.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj8dwvZfAUn
— So how did it go ? I said, sitting across from them on the couch.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA8aRzPayFO
— Difficult to say, my father grimaces. The principal had asked a doctor to come and answer the parents' questions. It calmed some when he assured their children were not at risk of breathing the same air as Jessy or touching him. But other parents are obtuse and want him to be expelled at all costs. They are simply scared to death, to the point of not understanding that AIDS is not caught like that.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjBemPwX3NY
— Mrs. Sutter spoke, saying how much she loves her son and that there is no risk in sharing his life since she has been doing it for a year without problem, my mother added. She is a very dignified and courageous woman. She told us you came to see her.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdjiXxn00Z2
— Indeed, I was looking for Jessy.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7KPE1eLvwb
— Nina told us that you went looking for him after Chad’s visit. Did you find it ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrKKUlexMMs
— Yes, and as far as you know, it’s over between Chad and me.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyTmZw4GXBw
Contrary to what I thought, my father doesn't seem surprised. My mother must have already told him about it. However, I don't like the look they exchange before my mother asks me : 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEZZCYR3cuY
— Because of Jessy ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdTKExYKI4b
— Yes and no. Jessy and I are friends. But let’s say that meeting him allowed me to open my eyes to Chad and his little world. I realized that, contrary to what I believed, I am not in love with him. I like him a lot but in a friendly way.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡykmDfWGXSb
Once again my parents exchange this strange look which seems to mean that they are not at the end of their trouble with me.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWGtHGTqLL7
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The next morning, when I arrived near the school, I saw Jessy waiting outside on the sidewalk.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQCxACtuZdl
— Hi, how are you ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwAMk6hEXxW
He puts a hand to his heart.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTj7sYcpo3s
— Oh, you scared me ! 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHVsKXXJFNT
I burst out laughing.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAMwBSHoPPw
— That’s for the scare you gave me last night ! 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkciPxrcDuu
— It’s fair game, he smiled.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq9KqB78m4e
He stares at the large white building without taking a step towards it. Since I stayed in his arms the day before for several minutes, he no longer intimidates me as much, and this impression of knowing him for a long time has strengthened. I saw his fragility behind his anger, I saw his despair, but also his strength.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLNbqn59kcI
— Are you planning to come to class today ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ56an6LWRSD
— I don't know. After what happened yesterday...and then this meeting.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFgVrK3XGfd
He huffs and then purses his lips, visibly uncomfortable.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡO9oIuUi0iX
— Did your mother tell you ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnAy5M8Tz6T
— Yes, apparently the parents can't do anything against me, but there is always the possibility that they will contact the academy and file a complaint to have me fired. In fact, I wonder if it wouldn't be better if I gave up... 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSHMnxHhJUx
— No way ! 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm0EfDUcCTa
Jessy looks at me, surprised.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxcs0DDEpWZ
— We'll go together and everything will go well, you'll see.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQUovNW7Sd
— There are looks that are sometimes hard to bear, he admits to me.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4zKN7bbr9l
However, I notice that he accompanies me towards high school.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhyGENvkxka
— I believe that, unfortunately, you can never please everyone, so give a chance to know you to those who want it and forget the morons.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjYgEbL670V
We enter the main hallway, students turn to look at us as I continue talking so that he focuses more on my voice than on the eyes focused on him.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8TTuCrQIEt
— With time, there will be those who will realize who you really are and they will come to you, as for those who continue to criticize you, act as if they don't exist. They're the idiots, not you.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaZXPXhzM50
I meet the gaze of a tall guy, named Tyler, who grimaces when he hears me.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIpSAmgqnUP
— Yes, complete idiots, I said again in a louder voice.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIgGHUXI5NO
Jessy gives me a grateful smile.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlKHawkVmJT
— Oh, it’s getting bad, he murmurs.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKYnBzbZkGR
I follow his gaze and see Chad striding towards us. He stands in front of Jessy and, after a few seconds of hesitation, offers his hand.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgWrpUYTA6Z
— I'm sorry for yesterday. For the fight…and everything else. I should never have listened to your conversation and above all I should never have repeated his secret. I'm really sorry.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGI6IuuOKVb
Jessy hesitates for a few seconds then squeezes his hand, nodding.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlFDR4NxRLk
— Thanks.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjjx1Ttas5T
His eyes move from Jessy to me, he doesn't seem to know how to behave around me anymore.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdLRSBKvDbr
Around us, several students observe the scene. Chad is the most popular boy in school and I suspect that after this reconciling handshake, the attitude of some people will change.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVOCXcxD7cx
He taps Jessy on the shoulder and says — See you later and walks away.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzf2TzQmLqS
— It’s weird that Chad came to apologize. Did you ask him to do it ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS4t51RvFtG
— No, he did it alone, but you know, he’s like that. He is impulsive, but quickly regrets his outbursts... I feel, more than I see, Jessy looking at me in profile.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZsxIZ3x10z
— What ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6O7t9DRnCX
I turn my head towards him.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxI5mRBuV1A
— Why did you break up ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmUi0fC6Odk
— We are too different.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡckGfWDLAen
I shrug my shoulders as if it were obvious.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdRVt4o8qS1
— And are you okay ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGZLowOp93C
I see in his eyes that he really cares about me, it warms my heart.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNdfuQnNmwz
— Alright.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnHTOG3iGVl
A small smile appears at the corners of his lips.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLLFJqpifyt
— I know you don't like Chad very much, but erase that little smug look. (I smile in turn as the bell rings for the start of classes.) We're going to be late, come on.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1tHF0ijXSr
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In the days that followed, things calmed down at the school. I can't say that Jessy goes unnoticed, but he is seen less as an outcast, which is already a small victory. At school, I was always the model student, collecting good grades. The super serious girl who has the teachers on her side. When I dated Chad, who is the most popular guy, I became popular and other girls tended to take their cues from me. So, even if there are a few who look away and whisper as she passes, most of the students are starting to accept Jessy. Since the evening on the bridge, we have spent a lot of time together. I prefer to be with him rather than with my pseudo friends : Pearl and especially Amy, who has turned her back on me since Chad and I separated.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDB8qWPSE9r
Jessy has become my best friend. I can talk to him about everything without being afraid that he will judge me; however, he always gives me his honest opinion.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmU1jto8slY
Jessy lived surrounded by family and friends before learning of his HIV status, but he told me that when those close to him learned of his illness, everyone turned their backs on him and, overnight, he found himself abandoned. Only his mother remained near him. By moving to Millisky where Mrs. Sutter found a job as a secretary in a bank, she hoped that her son would finally be able to return to a normal life.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqsh1ieGvPs
The more I get to know him and the less I want this solitary life for him, it's like a kind of mission that I have set for myself. I may not be able to save him, but I can make him smile again. Also, I force him to accompany me to the cinema, to the theater, to fast food. Jessy complains, protests, sometimes drags his feet, but in the end, I always make him give in.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6UaTHltlyK
— You've lived locked up enough like that ! » is my key phrase to convince him.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0nkBosMtNH
He then rolls his eyes, huffing in exasperation while his cross— shaped earring swings to the rhythm of his breathing. Finally, he looks at me with a little smile which alone symbolizes my victory.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmBU1mRf2wg
I am myself with him. We have a lot of tastes in common, we laugh at the same jokes, we talk about everything and nothing without ever getting tired of it. And when I'm not with him, he haunts my mind. He is the first person I think of in the morning when I wake up and the last in the evening before I go to sleep. In a few weeks, it has invaded my life and I hope more than anything that it continues as long as possible.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMx70Btef43
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— Hello Mrs. Sutter, are you well ? I say happily as I enter the living room, accompanied by Jessy.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbRFU5F6mzS
Over the past few weeks, I've been spending so much time at the Sutters' that it feels like my second home. I really like Jessy's mother. Just by his look, we perceive his kindness and his strength. I am always welcome at their home and even though Jessy can come to my house whenever he wants, I understand that he is more comfortable in his environment.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOTN8XGXt2r
— Good Meg and you ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqSwEv5PwDS
— I’m fine.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh6eJzvtL8U
Elise gets up while Jessy goes to turn on the television.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJbXKnPbrI2
— What movie are you going to watch ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaHOAadWTg5
— Ghost ! With a big smile, I show the video tape I brought, asking him : Are you staying to watch it with us ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS5FpNw6MA5
— Unfortunately, I can't. I have not finished completing a loan application for a client. I’m going to go lock myself in my room with this file, she sighs.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPn1AiBLkcF
— Good luck, Mrs Sutter. 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgzluXhjaCM
She takes a few steps away before turning back to me.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ45phZfCFv
— Meg, for the hundredth time, call me Elise.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzwDdH3AfyC
— I'll try, I promise.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoEZi1YvxXg
His mother leaves the room, leaving us alone.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡquHKfT8o9T
— Pop corn ? Jessy asks me. I only have salty, I don't like sweet.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7TMC2RXbBJ
— That suits me very well.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQdd1n7KaRQ
Once the popcorn is in a large bowl, we sit on the sofa in front of the television. Almost two hours later, I overcame my fear that he would send me away for daring to lean my head on Jessy's shoulder. To my great relief, he just smiled as he continued to watch the film. Now that it is ending, I can no longer contain my emotion and shed many tears.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJFbqdyIpin
— Don’t make fun, I said, seeing him laugh discreetly.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtl9l27vsTj
I stand up and stretch before wiping my eyes.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyqS71lAiex
— Patrick Swayze is too sexy, I comment.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1P4NS59x9J
— Demi Moore is not to be outdone, he sighs, lowering his head.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3AZWyDCaCf
He suddenly seems sad, which worries me.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQXNxlK1h3I
— Isn't that okay ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmqinxYmRE1
— Yes, it’s just that… Do you believe that the afterlife exists ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ052PJ1dArR
Still sitting on the couch, I turn to him.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDOjGpkyCtM
— I think yes. However, I don't know if it's like in this movie.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9LNEEK7dTe
He adopts the same position as me, we find ourselves face to face.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh4KKd3zYyk
— If that’s the case, I’ll make sure to let you know when I get there.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsCfTUa5pJB
I wasn't expecting this response which took me completely by surprise. New uncontrollable tears flood my face. Reality suddenly reminds me. When I am with Jessy, I forget his illness because he is him, the boy I love with all my heart even if he knows nothing about my feelings. But there, faced with the virus, I find myself facing its imminent death. It’s a horrible thing that I try not to think about, as if that could prevent it from happening. I know this is stupid and despite all my efforts, AIDS still remains in the back of my mind. But hearing Jessy talk about his departure is upsetting. I would love to tell him that I am in love with him and that he has no right to leave me, ever. However, this is one of the subjects that I cannot discuss with him as I am sure that he would send me away again. He needs support, so I'm content to be his friend, secretly hoping that one day he'll realize that I mean more to him.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtSZR6PSetS
— What do you have ? He is surprised.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ733kFv3lbD
— I don't want you to die Jessy ! 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNZpyXwayuM
I burst into tears as I threw myself on his neck. Immediately, he hugs me back.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF6FhqiJ8YE
— Don’t cry, he whispers in my ear. I don't like seeing you sad.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsTpQ7itBvv
His heart beating wildly against my chest reminds me that he is still very much alive and that as long as that is the case, we must not lose hope.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXPNRNw7vRK
Staring at him, I detach myself from him.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAR65hQ3OgD
— You're going to fight to stay alive, aren't you ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9G3bK5VoSU
He strokes a lock of my hair that falls to the side of his face while observing me attentively. He seems to weigh the weight of his words.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyftxFRlYgv
Finally, he nods in agreement.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ50gVUXHzS4
— I have confidence in the future and in medicine. They will find a cure, it’s just a matter of time, I resume with confidence.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHx54logFBs
— Meg, we've already talked about this. You can't save me.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA36rnwyjpB
He lowers his head but I have time to see his eyes fill with tears.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4NkLNW5WkC
— I know... For the moment, but I can keep hope, I smile, wiping away the last tears that linger on my cheeks.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZD5UhsL6Xu
Mrs. Sutter enters the room at this moment, breaking our moment of complicity.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGHwNVnDujM
— Megan, are you crying ? She worries, looking at us in turn. And you too ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ15wdaKQ0i9
Jessy and I exchange a look before bursting out laughing under the surprised gaze of Elise.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNb0K6BXifj
— I’m going to go home, I announce, leaving the sofa.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb1iOu6j9FP
— I'll take you back.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhaAmW8nJLl
— No, it is going to be fine. I need to get some fresh air.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVXU35623mt
Above all, I need to expel from my body this disorder that I am trying to control, and also to silence my fears about its future. Kindly, he will get me my coat. After putting it on, I turn to him and take him in my arms. For a few more seconds, I want to feel him against me.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUJML4ShSiD
— Do me a favor, hold on to life, I whisper in his ear.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8bMgiqCepP
Emu, he acquiesced.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1w63CPzE5p
When I leave the warmth of his arms, I see Elise watching us from the kitchen, she wears a little knowing smile, which makes me understand that she knows perfectly well how I feel about her son.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNy3Xisu4hz
— Good night, see you tomorrow ! I throw before going out.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZkvy9L96T5
I take a few steps while staring at the dark sky, inside I promise myself to do everything to save Jessy's life.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfL2i7cjPNG
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Since Jessy stubbornly refuses to tell me about his virus, during the days that follow, I go around bookstores looking for medical journals. At that time, when AIDS was terrifying the population, I had hoped to learn more, unfortunately the articles were still rare and the possible treatments even more so. Everyone repeats the instructions to follow in order not to be contaminated but none of them informs me about the solutions to overcome this cursed disease.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQFAEgNFIN5
— What is all this ? My mother asks me when I return home, my arms full of magazines and books.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdJWSIw7Ylg
— I'm finding out about AIDS, I admit, placing my load on the kitchen table.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF4E6eMvNDR
— Meg, I know you care about Jessy but... Don't waste your life for him.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtuKKAUxWW6
My mother's words felt like a stab to the heart.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXdHifBgj05
— That's not what I meant, she continues, realizing my fear.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwzO98Zx8fW
Hand on her forehead, she shakes her head as I grab my books again, determined to put an end to this discussion.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvKh7wHtLZ9
— Megan, you are 16 years old, you have your whole life ahead of you.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVdF2YhXk6P
— And not Jessy, right ? ! I get angry.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN6QeKrROdK
My mother looks down.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbYKjeX2mjk
— That's not what I said. I just think you're too young to have all these worries. You should be able to enjoy your teenage years completely carefree.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEYjGQvmVV1
— I would have liked it too, Mom, believe me I would have preferred that Jessy wasn’t sick. But he is and if I can help him in any way I will be there for him. I realize there's not much I can do, however, maybe one of these books will talk about a treatment and I can tell Jessy about it.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnrzbwQG6Um
My mother nods weakly.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3p3xwWDm6U
— I just ask you to be careful. Don't get too involved.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv2TeSThxcJ
— It's already too late for that, I emphasize. If it was Dad who was sick, wouldn't you do what you could to help him ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4I2Zn2RDp3
I turn on my heel, ready to leave the room when my mother asks me : 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡryMHVThjqH
— You love him, don’t you ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZiIcBB2Bqb
I don't answer. I lock my gaze on my mother's, trying to make her understand all the feelings that are inside me.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJq0PX0Dz8F
— Please don’t tell Jessy about these books, I ask her before going out.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN3pyFPKULc
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEzR3Cyjn2q
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7rBSfbIt0R
— Good evening, Megan, Mrs. Sutter calls me from the kitchen when I arrive at their house.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaEZE4Ewatd
— Good evening.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGk66mQr83m
— Jessy hasn’t come home yet.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTBsGGOiSKA
I look up at his mother with worried eyes. It's 8 p.m., classes ended several hours ago.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZN88UaIl5v
— Don’t worry, she reassures me. You know that his doctor advised him to go to the AIDS center, there was a meeting this evening. He had no desire to go, but I think it will do him good to talk to people who are going through the same thing as him.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡswRLo6ENLh
— Did he leave there complaining ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0m7BHvXShC
— You know him well enough to know that he complains a lot, she said, smiling.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0gVo92f9ao
— When he is with me, he is rather...309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmlX9pIYPfr
Hearing the front door open, I don't finish my sentence.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY6kjr2EQSv
— Yes, but you are special to him, Elise whispers to me.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3chO0gQVRk
I remain speechless, wondering what she means by that.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlZ5PV92liR
— Sorry to be late.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZtC0DMS89Z
Jessy's face is tense, he seems upset. The evening could be long if he remains in this state of mind.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVvqAmTOHWN
— How was it ? His mother immediately questions him.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUEvtrGjVEh
Jessy glances at me quickly before responding coldly : 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFpxwEBOGvq
— I don't want to talk about it.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsAbybUxk89
Mrs. Sutter looks at us in turn before announcing that she is going to watch television in her room so that we can watch the screen in the living room. Jessy walks around the bar and goes to help herself to some fruit juice.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡolC9b8rggE
— You want some ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCn4AvVzbkU
His tone is less cold, but still full of anger that he tries to contain.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaw7KbwLNJY
— Yes, thanks.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8vDbiUmLm4
He purses his lips before asking me : 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQY7BZs6Lxt
— What movie did you bring this evening ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGBdOGs7dw0
The week before, I had brought the filmGhost which caused us both to end up in tears. This time, I chose to take a lighter one, but still with my favorite actor. Proudly, I take the video tape out of my backpack and show it to him.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡblnctQU2J2
— Dirty Dancing ! 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgzl1XiCR9u
He rolls his eyes, but I sense that he is holding back a smile.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeVhXyrvDB6
— You and your Patrick Swayze ! I know you think he's the most handsome guy in the world, but your obsession with him is starting to turn into an obsession.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0uO9EyxFdO
I pretend to look shocked, which makes him laugh.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbvsEQT61AG
— It’s true that he’s hot, but in my ranking of the most handsome guys, he only occupies second place.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKWJoxgU8Zc
— Oh, my God, he whispers with a hint of despair. Which other actor are you planning to pester me with when you're done making me watch all his films ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6nkD0z3ymd
Jessy sighs, making a face. His good mood has returned, which makes me happy. I don't want to ask him about the meeting; If he wants to talk to me about it, he will do it alone. I just want to take his mind off things and see him smile. I get up to turn on the VCR while he puts away the bottle of orange juice.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQ2r8O6WTSN
— No others, I promise. For me, the hottest guy isn't an actor.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOdkmjH8XVK
— Ah good ? Who is it ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmhPj7tbPO8
He comes to join me on the sofa, frowning.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVNolle87FO
— He’s someone I see every day.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGKh5H5OC48
The movie starts and I shut up. Out of the corner of my eye, I see my friend racking his brain to figure out who I'm talking about.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVCLLUASd8H
— Your father ? he asks after a few minutes.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7kGz9OoNEu
Without taking my eyes off the screen, I shake my head and smile. It amuses me to see him searching.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ69PjxRZuPc
— Someone from high school ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCz1CVNqHFC
J'acquiesce309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVTQsnL7anO
— Chad ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIucObRVmYL
A hint of anger and disbelief filters into his voice.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6jbJVnsKnI
— No. Jessy, do you want to watch the movie or tell me all the names of the guys at school ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMaOGo5pZIm
— Sorry, but no matter how hard I look, I can’t see who…309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYIzZ4WVZN4
— It's you.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsYw5rzJNlW
I didn't mean to tell him, it just came out, and now I feel myself blushing as I keep my eyes glued to the television. The words have barely passed my lips before Jessy chokes on swallowing and starts coughing. He gets up to go drink some water.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmztgumdZn2
— Well, that makes you feel, I said mockingly, pausing the movie.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSKugQPK3Kd
— You got me, he says from the kitchen.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvQHTf8g75F
I turn around on the couch to look at him.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnRXND2DCbH
— It’s the truth, Jessy, I’m not making you walk.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgPaKS4NxAn
He comes back to sit next to me on the sofa. His cheeks are red as he places a kiss on my forehead.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgCcGHU5tFg
— It’s nice of you to try to cheer me up. I love you.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAnRCKBQiDb
That's not what I'm trying to do, I really mean it, yet my heart immediately races : he adores me. 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTZWHuiSFjC
— Is it true ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEEShR9KsNo
— Of course. You're my best friend, Meg.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZPniSItZTm
Oh… Friend ? My heart calms down quickly.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5d4tXqrAL0
— Aren’t you in good spirits ? Is it because of the meeting ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUalSTWC50k
Your mother told me about it, I add in front of his frown.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw5hRQfLJbH
— Yeah… it was depressing. Hearing all these patients talk about their fears… it brought me back to my own.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQgfWPt8oQk
— Did you speak with them ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMAB1F9cQGN
— No, I listened to them. It’s strange to arrive in this center where I don’t know anyone and where they invite me to confide.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLE0H0UrF57
— If you want, next time, can I accompany you ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTkXf2AeLN9
I suggest, but I already know the answer.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2XLfLZiaOg
— Non ! 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDNr8Puqfsa
His tone is harsher than I thought. However, he softens very quickly.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBSZxemSKQ7
— That’s nice, but no. I don't want you to come into this part of my life.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgrlQW45fDL
— For what ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHCAuvjBodn
Anger reappears in his eyes, he lowers his head.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE14NUKovAK
— Because you are too important to me for me to drag you into this world of illness with me.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ91VbxfLxkR
— Jessy… 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSukCk1pB2U
— No, Meg. I'm willing to give in when you force my hand to leave this house, but when it comes to AIDS, I won't change my mind, he said firmly, turning his gaze back to the television.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoAg00OYgbn
— OK as you want.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡY0cNfKZ7gs
I sigh as he resumes playing the movie. After a few minutes of silence, he glances at me and whispers : 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZOXyKkO0Ro
— Are you mad at me ? 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqB4YfV6kQR
I can't help but smile and lean my head on his shoulder like I've gotten used to doing when we watch movies together.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCmBhmAl4e3
— No, it’s your choice.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzYqtccN7fs
He places another kiss on my forehead. I whisper to him without taking my eyes off Patrick Swayze : 309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0InkDXaOCc
— Me too, I like you.309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF1GODuyIeB
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh3fVVJ2FXS
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjl6Z47ONJx
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMeCvdCGjpz
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6inSxqQiuf
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2iXIH9WOVG
309Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCseAq0bR9E
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