Once they got back to the house, they made dinner, and picked out a movie, almost forgetting about what just happened.
When they were finished eating, and put away all the dishes, Violet said, “Did you want to start the movie?”
Daniel sat at the table a little longer. “Violet, I want to talk.”
Her face went pale. “Oh. I’m sorry about the . . . about jumping out like that.”
“Violet, why do you get so upset when people yell at you?”
She closed her eyes. “Because yelling was always the first step.”
“First step to what?”
She sighed. “To getting beaten.”
“Who has hit you?”
She laughed. “Who hasn’t?”
“Violet, this isn’t funny. Who has hit you?”
“I don’t know.”
“You don’t know? What do you mean you don’t know?”
“Everyone! Okay?” she yelled as she stood up from the table. “Everyone has taken a swing at me! Okay? And I don’t like it!” She turned to face the window, to see that it was starting to snow just a little outside. “I don’t . . . I don’t like it. My stepdad, my mom, friends, sisters . . . everyone, okay?”
He watched her, seeing her shoulders tense up. “Violet, none of that was your fault.”
“I know. Didn’t stop anyone from doing anything.”
Daniel stood up from the table, and slowing approached her. “Violet,” he started. “You don’t have to tell me anything, you don’t have to relive anything. But if anything, I just want you to know, Karl and I grew up the way you did. We were beaten, and we understand.”
She slowly turned around to see him towering over her. “Yeah?”
“And I want you to know, it will never happen again. No one will ever lay a hand on you, do you understand?”
“I’ve had people promise me bigger stuff before,” she said, holding her arms. “I don’t know anyone that has ever kept their promises.”
“I promise no one will ever hurt you again.”
She looked up, and saw the dead serious look in his bright eyes. He was telling the truth, he was shaken to the core, angry and sad, but mostly wanting to tower and hold her like a small child, to protect her from the world.
“Okay,” she said. “Can you tell me about Jane?”
He swallowed, and backed away a few steps. “She was . . . my wife. We got married when we were young. We met each other at school, becoming an RN. We studied a lot together, and we were around each other a lot. We got married at 20. We loved each other very much.”
Violet saw the old man slowly walk to the table to sit down. Daniel put a hand on his hand, remembering everything. She stepped closer, and asked gently, “Doc, where is she now?”
There were silences for the longest time, but he took a deep breath, and finally said, “She’s gone.”
“Where did she go?”
“Heaven, if it’s real.”
She went cold. “You mean, she’s dead?”
He looked to the table, but gave her a nod. He thought about having a drink, but thought better of it. He couldn’t drink around her, she probably seen too many people do that before. “Yeah, kiddo, she’s dead.”
“I’m sorry,” Violet said in near whisper.
“It’s not your fault.”
“I know, but you looked happy in the pictures.”
“I was happy.”
“When did she die?”
He shook his head, “Hard question.”
“I know, Doc, but it’s been about a week and a half since we asked hard questions. You can ask me anything, and I’ll tell you, only if you tell me.”
She sat across from him, her arms inches from his. “You will?”
“I guess maybe not tonight, but soon, for sure. That’s how friendship works, right?”
He gave a laugh. “She died 20 years ago.”
“Have you ever dated after her?”
He tighten his lips and shook his hand. “No.”
Her mouth dropped. “You’re telling me you’ve never had a relationship with anyone after Jane? You never loved or had sex with another person after?”
“Way to be blunt,” he smiled. He was annoyed, but her energy had calmed him down. “But no, I guess not.”
“Why?”
“Why would I? Jane . . . Jane is the love of my life. I just couldn’t get myself to date after she was gone. Just a year ago, I finally was able to take my wedding ring off. It’s in my draws next to the bed.”
“How did she die, Doc?” Violet asked, gently touching his arm.
“It was my fault,” he said in a near whimper. “She got in a car crash.”
She was confused. “I’m sorry to ask, but how was it your fault?”
“We had a fight. A really big one and she got in her car and drove. A truck ran right into her. She was killed on impact, so she didn’t die in pain at least. I got the call, and . . . yeah, the driver was a young kid. I was angry at him for the longest time, but he was just a kid, barely 16. I thought about pressing charges, but . . . I think he’ll carry the guilt with him and that was enough. We all make mistakes, and I couldn’t take his life away. He wasn’t drunk, no drugs, just a bad driver.”
“But she died.”
“Yeah, she did,” he nodded. “When I got to the hospital I found out something that neither of us knew. She was barely five months pregnant.”
Violet’s eyes swelled with tears. “Oh my God, Daniel, I am . . .”
“It’s okay, I’ve accepted it a long time ago, and finally able to move on, somehow.”
“Did you know the gender?”
He was caught off guard. “Gender? Of the baby?”
“Yeah, Lily said around 5 months, you know the gender,” Violet explained. He just gave a small little smile with a laugh, and patted her head like a little kid.
“No, I didn’t know.”
“What do you think the baby was?”
“Well . . . I never told anyone this, not even Karl, but I had dreams it was going to be a little girl. When I dreamt of Jane, I dreamt of us walking down the sidewalk and swinging a little girl, playing at the park with her . . . do you want a drink? I’m sorry, I don’t drink that often, but I just. . . if you don’t mind . . .”
Violet shook her head. “Go for it man, but I’m not having one.”
He laughed and grabbed the Vodka bottle in the cabinet. “Wasn’t giving it to you anyways.”
“Why not?” she was confused.
“You’re under 21.”
She laughed as he poured himself a drink. “You would have been an amazing father.”
He looked up to her, gazing into her bright blue eyes. He took the cup and took an overdue drink.
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