Around the afternoon or so, at least after lunch, snow had started to hit the ground and stuck. The roads turn to ice and grass turned white. Less of the residents wanted to go outside and smoke. Daniel was okay with that. He didn’t like them smoking in the first place.
He thought it was horrible for them, and some of them with oxygen tanks that went out there just slowly killed him on the inside.
Around 1:30, Daniel took his lunch break and sat in the Activities/Social Directors office. The Social Director, Kendal, was out of the office, but Dana was eating her 88 cent microwave meal. Daniel knocked and asked if he could eat in there. Dana smiled and nodded. “Yeah, sure.”
“Thanks,” he said sitting down with his tray from the kitchen. He got the mash potatoes, veggies, and the fish. Every Friday the residents had fish. Daniel was really starting to hate the patterns going on in his life. “How are you?” he asked.
“I’m good. You?” she asked. Dana was a woman around her forties, and was a single mother of two grown adults and two nearly adults. She was strong and tough and caring. She was one of the few good ones around the work place.
He just shrugged.
He didn’t like her that way. He liked her as a friend and only a friend. Dana needed a friend and so did he. Meadow’s Manors had a lot of people who cared way too deeply about other’s people’s life and not enough about their own.
Dana and Daniel cared about them and who they loved. It didn’t matter to them if so and so was talking to so and so. It didn’t matter because it wasn’t high school.
It was a nursing home and they knew what their purpose was as to why they were there. Daniel knew he was there to make people happy, to make their last days relaxing and meaningful. He was there to make the residents happy. That was who he cared about. So did Dana and Kendal.
“How’s the fish?” Dana asked.
“Horrible.”
“I know right,” Dana laughed.
They sat there and talked about small stuff. They talked about what was going on around them in the world, what Dana’s family was up too. Daniel’s enjoyed Dana’s views. He didn’t like loud people, he liked strong people.
Dana was both but balanced it out very well. She was kind and caring, and if more people were like Dana, maybe the world would have been a more enjoyable place.
Around 1:45, Dana got up. “I have to get Activities going. I’ll see you later,” she said starting to walk out the door.
He envied her in a way. He envied how she could be so happy and playful when the world was throwing punches at her.
He got up, put his tray away, and finished up his work for the rest of the day. From 2 to 5:30 was the easiest. He got his charting caught up; the meds handed out, and got everything done. He clocked out and started to head out the building.
He said small goodbyes to his secretly favorite people. Before heading out the door, the Administrator came after him. She was a tiny little blonde woman. Daniel could hear her tiny heels clicking after him. He smiled. The tiny woman caught up with him, hitting him playfully with her purse, and greeted him, “Hello Daniel.”
“Hello Caroline, how are you?” he greeted his friend.
“Better days,” she laughed. “I’ll walk out with you to your car. How is everything with you?”
“I’m fine.”
“Fine? Or are you fine? Like, fine, fine? Or are you just fine?” she asked.
Daniel pressed in the code to open the door and stared at her for the longest time. He gave a confused look and just shrugged. “I’m fine.”
He exited and held the door for her. She put on her cream color coat and light pink scarf. “It’s going to snow harder tonight. Are you going home?” she asked.
“Yeah, I am. Stopping by my brother’s first though,” he said. “I can’t believe I’m snowed in on my day off though.”
“Same,” she giggled. “Listen, Walt and I was wondering when the next time you were going to come over for dinner? We both miss you.”
“Um, I’m . . . . I’m not sure,” he said walking without looking at her. She sighed.
“Daniel, stop. Look, I think you are falling into the darkness again. Have you been seeing Sherry?”
Daniel turned around and snapped, “I don’t need Sherry, I don’t need anyone!” Caroline backed up a bit. He saw the fear in her eyes. Daniel frowned and looked around. “I’m sorry.”
“No, don’t be.”
“I’m trying to find happiness on my own,” he said starting to walk away.
“You don’t handle depression well. And speaking as your boss, I’m ordering you to talk to someone, and to come over and eat our food!” she joked, returning to her normal self with him.
Daniel laughed. “Hey, how about I get a girlfriend.”
Her mouth playfully dropped. “Whoa, cowboy, let’s not cross the line here.”
“A young Russian bride, how about that,” he joked.
“Let’s not get ahead of our self,” she smiled along.
“But if I did get a girlfriend, or adopt a puppy, or went to some book club once a week, would that make you happy?” he asked. He realized he was sounding intimidating, annoyed.
Caroline sighed. “My happiness isn’t the issue here.”
He saw the worry in her big hazel eyes. He remembered last time he had dinner with her and her husband and little boy. He had a lot of fun. They were all nice. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. We just worry about you.”
“I know. I’m okay, okay?”
She gave a weak little smile. “Dinner? Near future?”
“Maybe,” he said pulling out his car keys. He unlocked his doors. “I’ll see you Monday.”
“Be safe,” she said walking towards her car.
“Me? Never!” he joked getting in. Caroline smiled and went on walking. Once inside his car, he dropped his bag in the other seat and started his car. He sat there, letting it warm up. The radio was playing pop. Top 100 songs.
He tried to listen but it had no meaning behind it. Music had lost its touch with the world, replaced with imagine of drugs and sex. Though that was the start of rock and roll, there was something a little more meaningful about it.
Only singers and artists who haven’t been touched by the devil’s hand could see the beauty around the world still. They can still talk about sex, but add so much beauty to it. Because it wasn’t about a whore, or about feeling good, or just how many people you could sleep it, it was about a lover. A lover that the singer would fight for till the end of time itself.
In the end, Daniel just turned it all off. He drove to his brother’s café and forgot about his day.
ns 15.158.61.51da2