Love is suicide.473Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmJjDZ2M8zy
You think I didn’t know that before I took the risk of falling? I fell too hard from Heaven, no—I fell too hard for Heaven like a fallen angel wanting back its burnt wings. But love is about taking the challenge and knowing where or how far will you go.
Anna is my sweet apocalypse. My irony of sweet sassy molassy. My bitter and sweet. My beautiful pain. Suddenly, love has made me a masochist minus the BDSM part. I wear Heaven like a branded shirt. I bring her anywhere like a cell phone. And she made me very corny. As if it’s not that obvious.
“Dude, will you stop it?” Scott told me when he decided to crash my piano rehearsal.
“Stop what?” I grinned at him.
“That!” he grimaced at me. “You look like a guy who’s madly in love.” he shivered in disgust.
I snorted. “I already am.”
“Shit!” he cursed. “Damn. Seriously?”
I raised both of my eyebrows at him as I continued with Chopin’s Waltz.
He shivered in disgust again. “That is so cliché—touché.”
I sighed. “What’s wrong with that? Scott, cliché still sells just like sex and groceries.”
He flinched at me and he blinked hard as if he’s checking if I’m real.
“What have you done to my best friend?” he narrowed his eyes at me. “Have you abducted him or something? Where is Dominic Savio? I demand to see him at once!”
I rolled my eyes at him and I focused on my musical sheet. “I’m right here, Scott.”
“Are you really my best friend? As I recall you’re celibate—” I scowled at him. “—were you conjured or something?”
I sighed again as I dropped the keys. “I am still me, Scott. Just better because of love.”
“Pooh-wee.” He wrinkled his nose. “Can you hear yourself? You sounded like a white noise, mate. It’s terrible.”
“And you sounded like a misplaced cacophony.” I retorted. “Scott, no offense—”
“But you’re about to offend me.” He cuts in and I squeezed my eyes shut just to not hit his smug face.
“—just because you don’t believe in love or fairy tales doesn’t mean I have to be corrupted as well. I chose to be happy and I feel sorry for you.”
“I feel sorry for you, Dom.” He prompted. “It’s… perversity. And things like that should remain in books and movies. They taint the real world black and white and it ain’t funny.”
“Harsh. Tell that to the novelists and the movie directors.”
“They get paid to make-up those things, Dom.”
“You’re being unreasonable and deficient, Scott.”
He sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. “Well, are you a prince charming?”
“No, but—”
“See.” He waved a hand to say he is correct and I am badly mistaken. “Sometimes we make up happy endings because we couldn’t have one.”
I shook my head in disbelief. I didn’t know I’ll have this argument with my best friend. And to think, it’s very null and very shallow. But I couldn’t blame the guy when he has been badly broken by love before. I couldn’t judge him either if he doesn’t believe in love or fairytales anymore because I didn’t know what he has been through to lose that happy ending.
“You are ever so bitter with sentimental facts.” That’s all I said to him.
He scoffed at me. “Dom, I am not. I just have a passion for hidden realities.”
“Too bitter.” I tried to sound teasing. “Aren’t you worried you’ll live alone? No girl sticks with you.”
“No one sticks because they’re not deserving.” He said. “I am Scott Orson. I only deserve the best.”
“Good luck to that.” I felt jeering at him. “But Scott, were you ever happy?”
“We’re I ever happy?” he said mockingly. “Does that matter?”
I raised my eyebrows at him and he sighed. “Look, Dom, I am not against your relationship with Anna. It’s not my fault that you fell in love with the first girl who looks like the skies would fall. I just don’t want you to experience love the way I did. It’s a hurricane you know. It takes away everything that it passes. I think I’ve lost too many happy endings to believe that there can ever be one left. It’s a waste of time to pay attention to tales that aren’t true. Besides, no one even tried to give me a happily-ever-after. Reality’s enough of bullshit already to learn in life. Yeah, it sucks but at least the moral lesson is: it’s real.”
I chuckled. “I’m adding sober to the list of Scott Orson.”
“No worries, my best friend.” He raised his hands in feign surrender. “I’m a firm believer of grief. Did you know Edgar Allan Poe’s my great, great, great, great grandfather? So that would make me his famous great, great, great, great grandson.”
He laughs but behind that smile I knew, I’d hit something more. It’s the farthest that Scott had opened up about himself. He’s always kept his doors and windows locked. I think there’s still more to the story but he’s still busy flirting with his prerogative and it’s not really my predicament to pry on his closets.
“But, Dom… what comes after Anna? What will become of you?” he said.
I sighed as I looked down at my hands on the piano keys. “I know things won’t end up so well with me and Anna. I already know that, Scott. I am not that naïve. But I don’t want to spend the rest of my life wondering of the possibilities of what I might have done—what I should have done when I still had the time.”
He cleared his throat and he forced in a smile. “Well, that’s way too emotional for me to take.”
I chuckled.
“But while we’re trying to get over the blue feeling, I just want to show you this.” he took a folded picture of an eight year old me in a sheep costume out of his blazer’s pocket.
I frowned at him. “Why do you still keep that thing?”
I tried to get the picture off his hand but he was too quick to take it off my reach.
“Dom, this is for bribery. Relax.” He smirked at me. “It’s to hold you hostage in my tentacles.” He laughed like a villain and he waved his tentacles—I meant fingers at me. “Besides, things like these are fascinating!”
“Excruciating you mean.” I scowled at him.
He narrowed his eyes at me. “They remind me of Human Evolution. Don’t you ever study World History, Dominic?”
I snorted just to state a point. “I do, Scott. Only that Charles Darwin was long dead before I was born.”
“Well, might as well show the fascinating Human Evolution to Anna.” He said.
“Show me what?”
And Scott jumps beside me.
“Annabelle!” Scott shouted and then he righted himself. “Anna Marie—I mean.”
“My piano rendition.” I answered her question.
She raised her eyebrows at me.
“I’ve decided to combine Chopin’s works for my presentation.”
Anna looked at the musical sheets I’ve heavily doodled with my “rendition”.
Scott hits my ankle and I hit him back. I glared at him as Anna frowns at my musical sheet.
“You have a terrible penmanship.” She said as she hands it back to me.
Scott snickered beside me and I narrowed my eyes at him. He didn’t have the chance to see how theatrical it is because his best interest went to Anna.
“Anna Marie Heaven.” He said coyly and Anna turned tentatively to me.
“Anna, I’m afraid to say this is my best friend Scott Orson—”
Scott waved me away as he inserted himself between me and Anna.
“Enchanted to meet you.” he took her hand and Anna was so shock she wanted to… I don’t know. Withdrew her hand from him maybe?
She turned to me while Scott held her hand. “I already know him.”
“Anna Marie,” Scott said.
“Just Anna.” She tells him.
“So, Anna Marie, I’m guessing you have a crush on Me.” he smirked at her.
“Scott, you’re not—”
I hear Anna scoff behind me. “Excuse me?”
“Yes?” Scott answered.
“Not everyone’s attracted to you, Scott Orson.” Anna said to him without breaking eye contact.
I wanted to intervene earlier but then I just chuckled beside Scott. But he was not ready to give up on her. In fact he tightened his grip on her.
“I’d very much appreciate it if you let go of my hand.” Anna said through gritted teeth. I was ready to take Scott’s hand off of her when he answered to her.
“You’re lying.” I had to flinch to that. Anna laughed this time but then she let the curtains fall and the play was over. So now she’s glaring up at him.
“Sometimes, we ask the wrong questions that’s why we think people are lying.”
That’s my Anna.
Scott sneered at her. I think she just stepped on his waters.
“Or maybe you’re just holding back.”
That earned him a gape from her. I on the other hand tried to intervene at the “situation” once again.
“Boyfriend just right here, guys.”
“Don’t be delusional.” Anna said. “You’re not my type.”
Scott snickered as he turned to me. “Hear that, mate? She has a type.”
“Yes, I do.” Anna prompted. “And if you’re interested to know, I like guys with dark hair and very blue eyes. It turns out it’s not you.”
I coughed again. “That’ll be me.”
Scott smirked at the both of us. “Such a corny couple. You are meant to be.”
Anna smiled back at him. “Nice meeting you, too.”
Scott raised both of his hands in surrender. “Raging hormones ebbed. I’m leaving you two love birds before I get myself some cooties.”
I kicked his butt and I wasn’t speaking literally. I did it to provoke him but he just laughed it out. And when he reached the door, he waved my picture at Anna like a white flag. But I can sleep tonight because he was too far for Anna to see.
Anna turned to me when he finally left. “You have a very charismatic friend.”
I narrowed my eyes at her. “Was it just me or were you flirting with my best friend?”
Anna huffed. “I perfectly made my type of guy very clear.” She sat beside me. “And he’s right here.”
I smirked at her. “Good to know.”
I placed my hands on the keys and I started playing a few notes of Beethoven’s Fur Elise.
“You know that one?”
She smiled at me as she followed the set of notes I’ve played.
“Impressive.” I said and I added a few more notes and she followed them until I got carried away and she stopped mid-chorus.
“You should get that scholarship.” She said as she looks down at my hands playing.
I looked up at her. “Are you sure?”
She looked up at me. “I want you to.”
I let my hand flow with the melody until my hand outstretched towards her space.
“I will. But right now,” I stopped playing and I held her hands. “You’re my priority.”
I leaned in so that our foreheads meet. I stared up at her pale blue eyes. They smile as they meet mine. She cupped my face with one hand and she dropped her lips on my chin. I pulled my face away from her so that I could kiss her nose. She blushed right away.
“I have something for you.” I pulled out my little gift for her from my blazer’s pocket and I handed it to her. “Behold! Your very own little red notebook.”
She smiles gently. “What’s this for?”
I took it from her hold and I placed it on the piano’s cover.
“This,” I pulled my pen out. “is where you will write things.”
She giggled. “Isn’t that obvious?”
“Write down things you want to remember.” I added and her smile faded.
“When all is forgotten.”
I brushed my thumb on the back of her hand. “You have me, Anna.” I lifted her chin so that she’s looking at me. “I won’t let you spend the rest of your remaining days forgetting, because I will be here to remind you.”
A tear escaped from her eye and I wiped it away. I leaned in to kiss her forehead.
“I hate crying.” she said. I lifted the pen between us and she laughed. She opened the note pad and wrote NO MORE TEARS at the very first page.
I wiped away the remaining tears on her face. “No more tears.” I echoed. “We’ll smile through the pain.”
“All smileys.” She grins as she turns to the next page.
“What else?’ I asked and she wrote it down.
I read it out loud.
Take me on a date.473Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN4uX3dnKt1
