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<06/02/2011 - 09:01 | 44 Greivar Trail, Marietta, GA, USA>
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Following my usual morning routine of eating breakfast and waiting out the full hour for my brain to become fully active, I prepared myself for a long day. The reflections I made for myself last night cheered my spirit into a perfect and excited mood. All I felt since last night hung over with me in full, and I started coming up with ideas for what I will do with Lumina.61Please respect copyright.PENANAyCw4YahV86
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Lumina... I never dreamed before now that you and I could have a meaningful relationship. But now, I want to be with you, all the time. Talking to myself only did so much for me though, so I got my shoes in preparation to head outside and call her. I assumed that the rain we had last night would block out some of the morning sun, preventing a quick warm-up of the outdoor area. Even if I can only have an hour with Lumina in the morning, and more time with her at night, I'll take that small time and maximize it!61Please respect copyright.PENANAAKLDralQkp
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However, the moment I stepped outside, that good mood I had been holding onto shattered into a million pieces with a single sensation crashing through me like the waves of an ocean. The air outside was not as frigid and cold as I predicted it would be. It was the most disgusting feeling of warmth and humidity mixed together. I thought Lumina was kidding last night when she used the term warm front. Georgia sometimes gets these rain storms from the south, bringing in warmer air despite the rainfall.61Please respect copyright.PENANAtxuiSC0sSJ
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So this is the result. There wasn't a single cloud in the sky right now, but the blinding sunlight already heated the moisture in last night's mist to the point where it stuck out here in this moment. I didn't need any help explaining why this would be such a big problem. In mere desperation, I quickly pulled out my phone, using it as a research source to check the online weather database again.61Please respect copyright.PENANAa5h2AP7Je7
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What I saw brought a permanent frown to my cheeks. Thanks to the warm humidity, the next three days are going to rise above 70 degrees and gradually become even warmer, including nights. Anything beyond three days is never accurate, so I don't pay it attention.61Please respect copyright.PENANA29ret513ff
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But it certainly came at a shock. The severity of the news didn't quite hit me yet, since I was panicking first about the prospect of such a situation. My mind forced me to think back and remember every single detail, every single word that Lumina and I spoke to each other last night. It brought back all of the wonderful things I was feeling earlier.61Please respect copyright.PENANAglUkRDnGbv
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Yet now, tormented by this new reality, I finally realized what it all meant. Everything we said to each other was real and genuine, including the part where I couldn't wait to spend more time with her. But thanks to this upset, I won't be spending any time with her, for the next three days, if not longer.61Please respect copyright.PENANApedrAfdT8O
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Still, even that isn't what freaked me out. It was the sudden realization of a horrifying phenomenon that I should have seen coming sooner. I know from living in this state what will happen once the deep stages of summer roll in. Days and nights will be far above sixty degrees, for a consecutive time of up to six months, possibly longer. Six consecutive months! At some point in time, I'll be totally separated and unable to speak to Lumina for six solid months. No contact, no communication, nothing at all.61Please respect copyright.PENANAhjun67IAXm
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The haunting possibility amplified the roaring silence in my head. It felt so empty and quiet without Lumina here. Even though we were just speaking to each other yesterday, the silence felt too strong now, after we confessed our love for each other. It's far too serious to be separated like this now; now of all times!61Please respect copyright.PENANA7SnJk6svoL
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"No!" I pounded my fist on the edge of the porch rail, as if it would somehow help my situation, though I remained determined as ever to be with Lumina again. "Not after all that! I need to see her again! I need to be with her one more time! Lumina... Connect with me..." I set my phone down, taking a pace forward to the edge of the stairs on the porch outside. I then held my arms back behind me, hands open, eyes shut, concentration forward. I made sure to project as perfectly and as strongly as I possibly could, a process that could only sustain itself for twenty seconds.61Please respect copyright.PENANANBthCp6iT8
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After wearing myself out, I immediately knew this time that my projections failed. I heard nothing but silence, while the familiar sensation in my head was also absent. "Why isn't it working?" I knew it was way too hot to contact Lumina, but I ignored that rule entirely, pretending like it never existed, desperately pretending to be more powerful than the laws of psionics.61Please respect copyright.PENANAIg1zPwbTUq
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In the end, my severe desperation got me nowhere. I already missed Lumina from the very second we had to disconnect last night, but I couldn't fathom what kind of experience it will be if prolonged heat waves prevents us from calling each other after all we promised. Flashbacks from the distant past started to playback in my head, included of which was one of Lumina's strongest warnings about not getting too attached to her when we spoke about telepathy. Her words were several consecutive months. Lumina didn't have an exact answer then, and I only had a predicted one.61Please respect copyright.PENANAe5OAQg8EVs
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I knew it was wrong to think that this will be the last time I ever see her again, but that terrifying thought started to take over, dominating every positive thought I've built up to this point. Hope spoiled into despair. Confidence converted into fear. All my assurances brought about anxiety and physical stomach pain which I wasn't expecting. And the smell of that summer air intensified all of my senses tenfold, making me feel everything stronger than I already could.61Please respect copyright.PENANA2Z6FkPTZq1
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I held onto what tiny sliver of hope I had left that this humid weather would go away within a week, but the thought of this lasing longer had my entire body wobbling with instability. I felt so dizzy just from the realization of what I've just done, an action I could never take back. I... I fell in love with Lumina. But you still warned me before not to get too attached... My breathing and pulse became rapid without me knowing, as I just stood there petrified on top of the porch. Nobody else was around me, but I only focused on myself and Lumina.61Please respect copyright.PENANACZ34E9Ah17
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Lumina, who isn't here with me anymore. The silence in my head continued buzzing at me louder, my thoughts accelerating in a dangerous direction. I only ever pushed the warning away, pretending like it would never affect me, but I always knew deep down this would happen one day. I knew that Georgia's six month summer would one day strike, blasting Lumina out of my life. It was the one thing I chose to ignore, the one thing I should have never ignored. I... Six consecutive months of complete silence, complete separation?61Please respect copyright.PENANAi5Sc2uEALb
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"No! This can't happen now! It's too soon!" School might finally be over, but that doesn't mean the summer here is official to the climate, right? "No, it has to just be another one of those one-week heat storms. Yeah-hah! That's it! Nothing to worry about at all." My own voice quaked with uncertainty as I made myself an empty promise, latching onto what could be vain hope.61Please respect copyright.PENANAdkQUjF5j79
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But I was doing all I could to handle myself. I felt like my entire mind and body were about to separate into pieces and fall down below me into a pile. The logic was written for me in the weather prediction reports, so I phased out logic. My reasoning told me I had to at least prepare for the possibility of full radio-silence, so, I phased out all reason. When all that remained was a highly unstable mass of feelings crashing into the boundaries of my now fragile mind, I decided to push all my thoughts into the background, and find something to occupy the leftover space. To my own benefit or downfall, I reassured myself that I would speak to Lumina again soon, no matter what.
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