DESPICABLE ME
Capítulo 5: Fighting in cassocks
The Uruguay River had been left behind and a delta accompanied the imposing view of the Rio de la Plata. And under this surprising frame, several cars tried to pass each other in the race. Race whose prize was the obsession of the competitors: the Rhea Eggs Trophies.
“As you can see from the magic camera, the cars down there come closer to each other in order to take a better position in the race," said Nahikari. “This phase, the Buenos Aires phase, is very close to the previous phase: the start phase, so Dr. Locovitch and Baron Hans Fritz will not be able to participate until their strange vehicles are repaired.”
“Thats right Nahikari," James corroborated, "in this phase the runners will first pass through the city of Tigre, which is very close to the Argentine capital. Once there, they will have to head towards El Obelisco, go around the Plaza de la República, and head towards the Casa Rosada, where they will receive one of the trophies: Golden Rhea's Eggs.”
“And now close to the Tiger," said Nahikari, "the riders are grouped as follows: first comes the Meteoro's match5; followed very closely by Penélope Glamour's gatito Compacto and her husband, Pedro Bello, with El Tempestuoso; Pierre no Doy Una's super Ferrari and Muttley, the dog; and Rex's shooting star.”
“The second group of runners," James told us, "is made up of: the Crushing Minion of Meena; the Chugabum of Mafio and his six co-pilots; the Frightening Mobile of the tenebrous couple; and the Sinister Claw of Silvestre dos Caras.”
“And ending with the last one group," Nahikari recounted Nahikari, "there are: the Rocomovil of the macana brothers, Piedro and Roco; the Alambique Veloz of Lucas and the fearful bear; the "despicable" led by Gru and his three daughters as co-pilots; the trunkswagen of Brutus and Listus; the red porsche of mama Lobo; the banana Split of the minion; and the super special junk.”
"And we arrived in the city of Tiger! James, the super Ferrari is falling behind and the second rider's group is approaching.”
“Damn it," complained Pierre no Doy Una. “Muttley, activate the smoke lance.”
The dog presses a button and a second escape emerges behind the villain's car, then a thick cloud of black smoke surrounds the runners who were stepping on his heels, causing them to brake and skid.
“That's cheating!” Nahikari shouted high up in the basket of the magic hot air balloon.
“In quidditch cheaters always lose and there is no exception here," James intervened. “Apparently the super Ferrari has a leak and the closed cabin is filling up with smoke. Pierre no Doy Una can't see where he's going... and crashes into the railing! I don't think Pierre won't be able to stay in the race.”
“Well, he deserves it," Nahikari approved, "no car was involved in an accident.... oh no, I was wrong! The chugabum appears to be immobilized. What can you tell us, James?”
“Well, apparently the chugabum skidded and his four tires exploded from the friction, a pity just as they entered El Tigre.”
“What do we do now, boss?” asked one of the tiny six co-pilots.
“Look gang, there are the train tracks nearby. Let's put the Chugabum on the tracks!”
“James, I don't believe it. Those seven Muggles are pushing the car to the train tracks.”
“Well, I don't know what they're trying to achieve with that, the Chugabum is not a modern carbon fiber car, it's an old-fashioned car made of pure iron, so its weight won't give it much speed on the train tracks," James said.
“All right, boys, “said Mafio, “let's use escape power!”
Suddenly, seven pairs of tiny legs were coming out from under the Chugabum and they started running frantically, making the old 1920s car not only advance, but also speeding up. Nahikari and James could not believe it and watched the sudden acceleration with the use of their omniculars.
“Unbelievable!” said James, as Nahikari was speechless. “I don't know how those Muggles do it but they're advancing at a hell of a speed.... they just overtook Rex's shooting star; Pedro Bello's Tempestuoso; Penelope Glamour's Gatito Compacto; and finally they overtook Meteoro's match5!”
“James, there's a train approaching on the other side of the tracks!”
Mafio and company jump and make the Chugabum turn around, and using escape power, run away from the train that is on their heels.
“And the Chugabum goes in the opposite direction to the other runners.... and it goes, it goes... and it went. I've already lost sight of tem," said James as he wore the omniculars.
“Oh, poor things," said Nahikari with a face of consternation (and laughter) on her face.
"And the runners have already entered Buenos Aires! And now they are heading towards the obelisk where they will circle the square to go to the finish line located at the seat of the Argentine government.”
“Because of Pierre no doy Una's tricks, most of the participants fell far behind the vanguard group.”
“That's right James, only four competitors will have a chance to win the first Rhea Eggs trophy.”
“...Nahikari, I see that in Republic Square, it's getting crowded.”
“What, that can't be! That whole place would have to be clear for the race.”
“They seem to be monks wearing banners and religious effigies," said James, surprised, and then he put on his omniculars to see better.
At both ends of the enormous plaza, two groups of people approached each other and looked at each other in the purest style of gangs of New York the film.
“Plagiarism," said Leonardo Di Caprio, as he watched Muggle TV and polished his Oscar.
On one side came a group with a banner that prayed: Church of Maradona.
The other group also had a banner, which read: Messi Church.
“The pure Maradona taught us that the true path is the passion for football.”
“Messi's untainted player teaches that the only way is to give his all for football.”
Suddenly someone said, "Well, our Maradona wasn't evading taxes," and the typical "salon brawl" began.
“Watch out, get out of the way!” shouted Speed Racer as he honked his car horn, but the fans were immersed in a berserker state from the "dog-face" fight.
“Who are these guys!” Penelope Glamour shouted as she bragged about her driving as she evaded the lunatics in front of her.
“My love, be careful!” shouted Pedro Bello to his wife, even though he couldn't afford to distract himself from running over anyone.
“Crazy," Rex grunted, while barely keeping his yellow car from hitting anyone.
Fortunately, the four riders were experts and avoided running over the fools who continued to insist on the fight. Less fortunate were the runners in the back who were unable to continue the race.
“Soldier, I'm going to fire the cannon!” shouted the sergeant's big mouth in the special super junk.
“But sir, you can't shoot civilians!”
“Quiet soldier, it will only be a warning shot," said the sergeant and then fired the cannon, with such misfortune that the projectile struck right at the base of the Obelisk.
The huge monument began to crack and then began to fall gradually on the people underneath it.
The runners fled in all directions but the fans of both sides fled in a straight line and just below the Obelisk.
“Turn right, turn right, turn right! Forget it," James said resignedly, watching the Obelisk fall to the ground, crushing all the fanatics.
“Plagiarism," Charlize Theron, the actress who co-starred in the movie Prometheus, who ended up being crushed by the spaceship, told Muggle TV.
“As my partner Nahikari became mute again from the impression (you can't blame her), my person tells this instead. We can already see the Casa Rosada, and Speed Racer and Penélope Pitstop are approaching, followed very closely by Pedro Bello and Rex.”
"And we had a photo finish, gentlemen! I get the tip and it's.... Speed racer, who crosses the finish line first, followed by Penélope Glamour in second place and her husband Pedro Bello in third.”
"Trixie, I made it," Speed Racer thought euphorically as a beautiful model handed him one of the Rhea Eggs trophies.
The trophy was equal to any cup except that it bore a bronze replica of a rhea egg.
CONTINUARÁ...
What an amazing end, my friends, but it's not over yet, vote and comment that there are still many chapters to go.
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