Can we switch shoes?
I’ll wear yours and you can wear mine.
Live a day in my life and let me know what you think.
Maybe then you can figure out what’s wrong with me, what isn’t quite right in my head.
Because I refuse to be like this.
I’m sinking into this dark abyss.
If you ask me my favorite color I’ll say the one that I know you like best because I'm afraid if I say the wrong color you won’t like me.
I write paragraphs and sentences and essays in my mind yet are never shared
I nod and agree with whatever you say because it’s easier that way.
I lock up all my words in cardboard boxes never to be opened.
I never say what I feel, and never feel what I want.
I’m a mess of half-formed sentences.
Sometimes I like to see how long I can hold my breath before my body forces me to breathe.
I want to feel the adrenalin pumping through my veins, but I'm too scared to leave my room.
I am never alone,
But I stand here with no one to hold.
I don’t have motivation,
Yet I somehow get things done.
It seems as if nobody ever gets the appreciation they deserve until they die.
So maybe if I go into that bleak oblivion, people will notice all my effort.
Maybe then they will see how much I felt,
Maybe they’ll see how much I longed to be loved by someone.
And maybe someday I'll be more than just a passing glance or a shadow on the wall.
Maybe someday I'll mean something to someone.
Someday, I'll be more than what I am.
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