I was told becoming queen would be one of the most fulfilling tasks I could ever do. If that was true, then why did it feel like such a burden. I knew at a young age I wanted to make a difference for my country, but it was revealing to be harder than I had thought. I eventually told everyone of my court members off when they tried to make decisions for me knowing full well that they didn't have the authority to do so. That was when I knew I needed a break. I had wanted to leave home since before I became ruler, but it never worked out in my favor. I didn't even have the right to complain, not when more than half of my own people didn't have an inch of what I did. I frowned just thinking about it; I had been in charge for about a year now. I had already fired two court members, a couple of servants, and a chef.
Not to mention it had only been four weeks of me officially entering the position when all that happened. I knew that I could411Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQvWvbFULJr
always replace them and that's exactly what I did. It might have been the best decision I made too. Only because my new chef is absolutely exceptional. Her delicacies matched my tastes perfectly. I’d fire everyone if I needed to just to have her continue cooking for me. I could have cared less about the others. The now unemployed thought they would try to use my novelty against me, which had irritated me. To think two of them were some of the most trusted court members, at least they were according to my father. The servants I fired were working alongside them giving them a rundown of everything I did each day. That doesn’t say much for the rest of the court members I suppose. I'd have to decide if I still had more to fire in the future. I would just have to wait to see.
A couple of days outside the palace walls sounded really satisfying. I requested permission of course. Didn’t do me much good. The court and my mother declined. I didn't understand how they could tell me no when I was the one that had the authority to sign laws and pacts into place. So, in my best interest I decided not to listen and made it clear that I didn't care if they had declined. It was not the best impression of myself I could give to those who saw it, I can admit that much. I could envision the decision be read in the meeting chamber just thinking about it. I had been sitting in my father throne chair while the court members stood in front of me. I leaned back sinking in the chair tapping my fingers on the arm rest half listening to them speak. The "We do not think it would be a smart idea to leave" ended up catching it, though. I narrowed my eyes at them and stilled taking a moment to breath before I said something I would regret. Obviously, that didn't help. The next words that came out my mouth were, "Alright, you all don't think it's a smart decision. That's fine, but I must inform you that I don't care what you think. I will do what I please without you controlling me. If I want to leave, I will do so. Do I make myself clear?" They weren't too fond of that response. There were arguments from people talking over each other trying to get me to understand that I wasn't allowed to go. I chose to get up from my seat and leave the room. To my misfortune they trailed after me still blabbering away. This time I spun around to face them, calmly stating, "If I see any of you in front of me in 3 seconds, I will personally throw you out of the palace myself. Then I will make sure you can't find any decent work in my country again just so you will have to leave, and I won't have to hear of you ever again, to another country that will take you in. And most importantly you will probably never have a court position in that country and somehow if you do manage to find a way to work as one and I find out... let's just say your position will be taken within at most an hour once I'm done talking to the king or queen, maybe both." I closed my eyes and breathed in and out. Opening them I then smoothed out my dress. "Does everyone understand?" Without waiting for an answer, I said with a smile on my face, "Good. Get to leaving my presents please!" That was all they needed to hear, no hesitation at all. Those who had witnessed it kept their heads down as I walked pass them.
The important part was that they eventually had to agree once everyone saw me marching through the lavish golden halls with multiple bags in my hands and a few more in the hands of the servants behind me. My mother and a few members of the court came out to the sight of me packing my bags into a wagon. I didn’t want to ride in anything nicer as it would bring to much attention to myself. I was bringing a couple of guards with me, of course. They would need to get their own wagon, though. I wasn’t sharing mine. Oh, but I quite enjoyed my mother’s face when she saw what I was wearing. She was surely dazed, and I saw her bright sparkling green eyes grow round as they glanced over me. If her eyes could burst out of their sockets, they were close to doing it.
“What are you wearing? And where…where are you going? But first…first answer, what are you wearing?” She was in so much panic I almost grinned, but I didn’t have energy for that. I felt drained from everyone’s nagging. Not including the nonstop tasks that kept coming to me every single day. A normal day was breakfast as my schedule was read to me, signing papers, continuous studies, training, meetings (once a month), socializing with guests, dinner, and going to sleep. I was lucky if I got an hour to myself. Everyone wanted to have a word with me about some form of a problem that was always occurring.
“Can’t you tell? They’re trousers,” I replied dryly crossing my arms. I had changed into them shortly after the meeting. “And I’m going somewhere nice and quiet.” At least that’s what I had planned to do before this unwelcomed interruption. Some would probably have been pleased with this unwanted attention of everyone's gazes on them, I wasn’t one of those people.
“You…you can’t go out like that! I won’t allow it. It's an embarrassment to this family,” my mother exclaimed. I chuckled and said, “Since I’m the temporary ruler, mother, if I told you ‘I won’t allow you to stay in my kingdom’ would that have any effect on you? And hopefully no one find out who I am.” From the expression on her face, I think she was vexed at my words. Not that I minded. It didn’t have an effect on me; she was always upset at me for some reason. If I had to guess it'd probably be my bad habit of ignoring everything she said. I don't understand how she could be angry over something so insignificant, I did that to everyone else too, so it wasn't like I was leaving her out of anything important.
“You ungrateful child. To think I raised you like this. How did you become so cold and heartless?” I tilted my head and shrugged answering with, “Eh, better luck next time.” Her eyes widened at that, and I knew it'd be in my best interest to leave. I shook my head; she wonders where I get my temper from. I grabbed my last bag and threw it in the seat next to where I would be sitting. It wasn’t much of a seat. I was sitting with all the other junk piled in the back of the wagon. I had just made room for myself to be in the mix of it. As for my mother, she'd have enough time to cool off while I was gone. I wasn’t her favorite child anyway. Oh, but I was the 'better luck next time', so what did that mean for her first born? I laughed telling myself I'd just have to be good enough.
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My eyes fluttered open when I heard the driver call out to me saying they were stopping for the night. I looked around noticing it was dark besides for the burning fire they had started. And everyone had already made makeshift beds on the ground with the blankets they had brought. They’d be alone with that because I was sleeping where I was now. In the wagon. I unlatched the buckle on my bag and grabbed the wooden box which contained my dinner I had prepared by the chef for me. It was a loaf of bread and some chicken she had whipped up this morning. I even brought along some wooden utensils. I lifted my eyes and noticed everyone else looking at me.
“No,” I said sternly. They should have prepared food themselves if they wanted something for dinner. This was mine and I wasn’t giving it to anyone. Looked like I was just smarter than them.
“I didn’t have time to get me anything good like that. You know because I was too busy packing my things as quickly as possible,” a middle-aged guard said. I knew him of course, well technically I'd seen him around patrolling the palace. What I didn't know was his name.
“That sounds unfortunate,” I told him while stuffing a piece of the chicken in my mouth. I then made sure to chew extra loud, "So good.”
“You insufferable brat,” I heard him muttered. I rolled my eyes at that and reached to grab the bag that was prepared for the everyone else. I took a good long look inside. Kind of felt bad. I'd cry if I had to only eat this.
“Catch you baby.” I said obnoxiously throwing him a loaf of bread. When he caught the bread, I threw a container full of water to him. He gladly caught it and raised his hands again as if I was going to give him something else. I raised an eyebrow. “That’s it. Bread and water for you.” I then tossed everyone else a loaf of bread too. As I did so I heard mumbles saying, “She’s so cruel.” Then another replying, “Especially for such a young girl, what a waste of her beauty.” That was offensive I thought scoffing. The last one said, “How’s anyone going to survive such a successor if she's already like this.” Eh, I didn’t really mind that one. I knew I wasn’t the nicest person out there. I had a quick temper and liked things a certain way. Specifically, my way. Patience was a virtue I didn’t have. I would say that the country was doing well if not better because of me. My characteristics had to be worth something if that was possible.
After they were done eating, they each took turns keeping watch and sleeping. I stayed up most of the night because I wasn’t tired. I listened to the crickets chirp and observed the little bit of leaves there were left swaying on the tree branches. Other than the crickets and the swishing it was mostly quiet. I considered speaking to the guard on duty but changed my mind as soon as I realized that I had been thinking it. My spine shivered in disgust just replaying the idea in my mind. Something must have been terribly wrong with me for me to even think about socializing when that was exactly what I wanted to get away from. I eventually watched the sun rise and when it did, I woke the driver up, so we could keep moving. He didn’t like that very much; he wouldn’t stop groaning and turning to the other side. I preceded to gently shove him awake. At least it was gentle in my brain. He didn’t seem to agree from the expression he was making. He couldn’t do anything to me about it even if he wanted to. So, he just stumbled back into his seat and did his job.
I hadn’t gone out much in the past five years. Honestly, it was suffocating. I was left alone most of the time for study purposes. My father had decided early on that I would be the next successor. When my mother found out she was furious with him. Then when he fell ill everything came crumbling down along with him. I had to step in at the age of fifteen. My life turned upside down and I was thrown into the position of temporary ruler. I had help, for instance, my cousin, Luke, was by my side the entirety of it. He wasn’t much older than me. At the time he was seventeen. He didn’t have a great deal of knowledge about how to rule, his support was more than enough for me. It was more than my own immediate family gave me. Luke assisted me with how the other countries operated and what they were doing recently in the beginning of ruling. He wasn’t assigned second only because he didn’t want the position. He may not have wanted that position, but I would give him one as a court member in the future. That's why I had given the list of demands to him, so he could take over while I was away. I trusted him. He was the only person I told where I was going just in case something went sideways. When I got back, he would also give me a list of what I already knew was going to be decent length of what I had missed. I made sure to make an announcement for everyone to obey his orders. There would be a serious issue if anyone objected to that message. That I would make sure of.
I sighed; I didn’t want to think of that now. I had been planning this for a while; it was going to be a peaceful experience in one of my smaller towns that grew all kinds of fruits each year. It had the perfect combination of quietness and mountains. We would stay near the bottom of the mountain in cottages where a kind older man I had been writing allowed us. I only heard about him through a servant who said her grandmother knew him. It didn’t take much effort for him to agree. He appeared to be a sweet older man. If I recall his exact words were “Yes! Do come, please! Any time you want. You don’t have to ask, your highness. It would be an honor.” After that couldn’t refuse his offer, especially once he mentioned his farm. Such as the newly born calves and foals, neither did I take much convincing. I had animals at the palace, yet I found it much more fascinating to see his. Maybe that was due to the old man telling me he would give any animal of my choosing. I never had a pet that was just mine, nor did I tell anyone that I was bringing one back. They weren’t going to stop me. I slapped myself, softly of course, because they couldn’t stop me even if they tried. They worked for me. I needed to get that through my head sooner rather than later. I had no problem demanding what I wanted when it came to my country. It was the childish things I couldn’t ask for, the rules I always had been told not to do that flooded back in. I would wear what I wanted and act how I pleased… in a respectful way, of course. Anyway, he also tried to argue against me paying him, but I insisted. At this rate we should be there by tomorrow evening. I could feel the oncoming smile tug the edge of my mouth as I thought about it.
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