Chapter 26: Coming Back To Life
Jamie called after several months and asked a favor. Her daughter Lo was moving to Columbus, and she wanted to know if my rental next door was available. I said it was, and she could move in for $500 a month. This was quite a bargain as my very first tenant had paid $1250. I didn't really care, as I was in bankruptcy proceedings and wasn't making mortgage payments anyway. Lo and a couple of friends moved in, I think they made two rental payments in the six months of residence. A month later, they had a party and this is when I met Jordan. We talked briefly and Jordan asked if she could see me the next morning. I had a chess set, and she asked if I’d like to play while we talked. I’m a decent player and thought this was going to be a cakewalk. I was impressed, she almost beat me. She was 19 and explained her step-brother was getting out of prison. He had been convicted of raping her and her sister when she was eleven. She didn't want to be in her hometown and asked if she could live in my basement for $50 a month. Several weeks later, she moved in, and we lived together for eight months. My mother used to say she was fortunate for having such a late baby, as my friends kept her young. This is exactly what Jordan and her friends did with me, and we became quite close. Jordan’s nickname was “Chairman of the Board” because she made a very good living, selling drugs. She moved quantities of LSD, DMT, mushrooms, opiates, ecstasy, molly, you name it. Here we go. Again.
One time Lo threw a party, she sent out some text messages and over 70 arrived. This was on a summer Saturday evening. Jordan gave me two hits of LSD and she took two. About a half hour later, we had to make an alcohol run for beer pong. We’re walking towards Jordan's car and a huge fight broke out. It turns out, some white dude found his girlfriend having sex with a black man in his car. All hell broke loose and this is a very upscale neighborhood. I said to Jordan, “Let's take my car.” We bought the beer and came back to my duplex. Five Gahanna police cruisers were there. Lights on, sirens blaring. We went to Lo’s side and everyone was gone. It's dark, and we’re standing in the kitchen with police floodlights coming in, tripping very hard. I felt like I was a Jew in Nazi Germany. This is something that cannot be explained, just experienced. Over twenty people, had gone to the basement where there weren't any windows. Jordan had one hundred hits of LSD on her and had to get rid of them. She dosed everyone there. I don't remember much about that night, I just know we had fun. We ended up playing beer pong in the neighbor's garage at 9 am. I picked up over three trashcans of whiskey, wine, and beer bottles. My neighbor wanted to know if this would ever happen again. I said, “I hope not.”
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Months later, Jordan wanted me to go to a 3-day festival at Buckeye Lake. It started on Friday, ended on Sunday and there would be over 17,000 in attendance. I drove up alone, had my beer buzz going, and crashed on top of my tent late Friday night. Festivals are a blast, everyone is in the same mood to party, listen to music. Tent neighbors become instant friends. 7am, I met my neighbor, Brian. I asked if he'd like some Goldschlager, and we drank the whole fifth by 11:00. He then gave me a big line of molly, like ecstasy. Jordan found me around noon and we went exploring. The first tent had two big liquid vats, one was a pink color, the other was yellow. The pink was laced with LSD and the yellow with Psilocybin Mushrooms. We drank both. An hour later, we went to the second tent, tripping hard and smoked opium, which I hadn't seen in 30 years. The next stop, Jordan said, “You’ve always wanted to try DMT, now’s your chance.” I went into another dimension for about 15 minutes. I called it “Lego land”. We. arrived back at my tent at 5pm, and she gave me 2 big lines of ketamine, a cat tranquilizer. She said I started speaking in tongues, I fell hard on my left shoulder, hurt the next day. We ended up meeting Sunshine at 7pm and I took two hits of Grateful Dead LSD. This amazing day was a result of hippie tripping, taking powerful hallucinogens quickly. Tom Petty,“Never slow down, never grow old.”
One more short Jordan story. On Halloween, we went to an indoor water park. Inside, she gave me some Analog LSD. With normal acid, one starts tripping after 45 minutes, and it lasts 7 hours. With Analog, the trip starts in 2 hours and lasts for 15. I only tried this once and found out after the fact that people have died from brain lesions. We also did some molly and ate a mushroom. Just one cap. The vague memories I have are being in a hotel room with several guns, and somehow, in the pool. Where did the trunks come from? I ran into a policeman in full uniform, I had helped him with numerous cell phone issues. He opened up his hands and there were bags of molly which he had confiscated. I told Jordan I had to go at 12:30, as I opened the store at 10. While driving, I literally felt like I was driving on the ocean, as I looked at buildings they would phase and shift, headlights were showering me in varying vibrant colors. I arrived at work and a friend said, “You’ve coke in your nose.” I said, “No it's not, it's Molly”. I survived the day.
On a winter Friday night, I planned to drive 30 minutes south to see an old friend. Spur of the moment, I decided to take 2 hits of L.S.D. This was not wise. I started the car and went inside to drink a beer while it was warming up. I bundled up, buckled up and started on my little trip. After a couple of minutes, I noticed I was low on gas, so I pulled into a station and started pumping. The acid kicked in hard. I was only 10 minutes from home and thought there was no way I could drive that far. I called and explained a sickness was coming on. Instead of 10 minutes, It took me 2 hours to get home. I remember going to the Columbus airport 3 times and back north to the mall twice. I could not get to my residence and thought at any moment Rod Serling would appear and say, “This is the Twilight Zone.” When I finally arrived, I dropped to my hands and knees and thanked God. I discovered LSD and driving are not the grandest of ideas.
On New Year's Eve, I had a ticket to go to a downtown rave. I gave it to my roommate, as I always went to the Alumni on New Year’s. In return, she gave me a ball of psilocybin mushrooms and said, “Bob, do not eat the whole thing.” My friends left, the old common sense kicked in, and I ate everything. I walked into the club at 11:15 and the moment I opened the door all music stopped. The colors and movements were completely frozen and everyone was looking at me. I “heard” them say, “Buy us all a round.” I saw an old friend sitting at the bar, Jim said, “Can you loan me $20?” I said,” Brother, I’m getting sick, and I am going home.” I went to the car and the next thing remembered is waking up in the Alumni parking lot at 1:30. I thought I had been on a high-rise in downtown Columbus looking at fireworks. I completely transitioned New Years. I’m extremely tripping and knew I must get home. Immediately after entering the two lane thoroughfare, a police car pulls behind me. OMG, I am really paranoid, but thankfully he passed me. Several minutes later, a second cruiser is following. What? Are they talking with one another and setting me up? I stopped at the light to my home, and thankfully he went straight. A few minutes later, a 3rd policeman is behind, so I pulled into a complex that wasn't mine and turned off the engine. After 20 minutes, I arrived home and saw that only a roommate and his girlfriend were there. I wished them a Happy New Year, went to my room, put on my headphones and listened to Enya for the next 5 hours. I had completely phased through New Years and thanked God for getting me safely home. Miracles happen all the time. The following happened several months before I had met Jordan.
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