Drew’s dad’s loft is really nice. It’s a total bachelor pad, but it has everything a teenager could possibly dream of and the refrigerator is still stocked like he actually lives here. My dad continued to blow me up so I shut off my phone. I didn’t want anyone tracking me to where I am. The last thing I want is to get Drew or his family in trouble.
“Oh my God,” I began to feel nauseous, “what have I done?”
Drew pulled me into his arms and held me, “Just give him time to calm down Sid.”
“Why did I do this? He’s going to send me back to boarding school and then I’ll never see you again. He’ll just lock me up and throw away the key,” I panicked, “I should’ve just kept my mouth shut like you said. I should’ve just went to my room and let him calm down. Oh my God…why did I do this?”
“Sid, calm down. What’s done is done. All I care about right now is making sure you’re safe and okay.”
“Don’t you get it? If he sends me back to that place I won’t be any of those things. It’s a bad place Drew. The new head mistress swore that if I ended up back there I’d regret it. I can’t go back there.”
“Then we’ll figure something out, just calm down.”
“God I’m so stupid. I have a 4.0 GPA in academics but I am failing in life,” I sulked.
“You’re a teenage girl,” he chuckled, “drama is a right of passage or a coming of age thing for you girls, isn’t it?”
“No…maybe,” I shrugged non-commitally.
“I know you’re freaking out, but we have three uninterrupted days together thanks to my dad. Let’s make the best of it and we can worry about your dad and all that later.”
Drew pressed his lips to mine, and his tongue swept through my mouth. My mind went blank and my hormones shot through the roof. Drew’s words finally sank in. We’re alone. He and I are alone, in his father’s loft, with no adult supervision and no one to stop us from doing anything stupid if we wanted to. This is probably the last time I’m going to see Drew for a while, so I definitely wanted to make it count.
I shrugged off my jacket and grasped his face between my hands. His hands slid down the small of my back and firmly gripped my backside.
“Where’s the bedroom?” I asked.
Drew’s eyes widened, and he took me by the hand past the kitchen and up some stairs where there were two bedrooms. Both had their own bathrooms. We avoided his dad’s bedroom and ended up in the spare.
“Sid-” Drew hesitated.
“Sh,” I shushed him, pulling him into the room and closing the door.
I tasted his lips a few more times as I backed us up to the bed, climbing onto it and pulling him down on top of me. “I don’t want to talk, I don’t want to think, I just want to do it,” I told him.
“I don’t have protection.”
“I don’t care. You can just pull out. That’s what guys do, don’t they?”
“Not if they’re smart, and I’m not trying to have any babies right now.”
“Then when you feel yourself getting close, just pull out.”
Drew reeled back and stared at me like I’m crazy. I bugged my eyes out at him and he laughed, lowering his lips to mine. Things began to heat up between us and then his phone rang.
“Don’t answer it. Just ignore it.”
“I can’t, it’s my mom.”
He climbed off of me and answered his phone. His mom asked him if he’d dropped me off and he looked over at me. He told her he had and that he was going to go hang out at Xerxes’ for a while, but we both knew he wasn’t going anywhere. It was enough to get her off the phone though.
I pulled Drew’s lips back to mine and things began to heat up once again. I took off his shirt and ran my fingertips over his well-sculpted abs. If I’m going to go down in flames I may as well make the best of it.
“You sure about this?” Drew asked.
In response, I took off my shirt and tossed it to the floor. His eyes lowered to my bra and he finally stopped talking. His lips met my neck, my shoulders and the peak between my breasts, followed by his tongue.
Internally I was conflicted. I’m well aware of what I’m doing and I don’t want to stop, but I wonder if it’s bad timing or if I might regret it. Drew has yet to prove he’s boyfriend material, but somehow I trust him. I feel comfortable enough with him to unfasten his pants so he can quickly put me out of my misery, but then he stops me. He stops everything and shakes his head.
“I can’t do this.”
“Why not?”
“Because I don’t want to be used to get back at your dad Sid,” he sighed, climbing off of me.
“That’s not why I’m doing this. I told you a long time ago I’m ready.”
“And what happens if you go to boarding school, huh? Are you gonna expect me to wait for you?”
“I don’t know. I haven’t exactly thought that far ahead.”
“I wouldn’t wait for you Sid. I could lie and say I would, but truthfully I wouldn’t. And its not because I don’t love you. I love you more than you know, but guys have needs. I don’t think we should do this. At least not right now.”
“You didn’t have a problem doing it with all those other girls.”
“Yeah, because they’re not you,” Drew sat on the edge of the bed, frustrated, “I can be a player, everyone knows that, but I meant what I said when I told you I was done with that. For you…I’m done with that. But if you’re going back to boarding school…I don’t know, it changes things.”
“In other words, you don’t want to sleep with me.”
“I do, just not like this. This isn’t how I want your first time with me to be.”
I crawled over next to him and leaned my head against his shoulder. It meant a lot that he took our relationship seriously, but at the same time I wanted something to remember him by. I wanted to feel close to him.
“What am I going to do?” I groaned.
“You can start by turning on your phone and texting your parents to let them know you’re okay. Then let them know you’ll be home in a few days once you’ve had time to calm down.”
“I can’t,” I shook my head and handed him my phone, “you do it.”
Drew took my phone and texted my parents for me. Surprisingly, my dad didn’t start making demands of me to come home. He simply told me to be safe and not to do anything stupid. That he’d see in me in a few days. His suddenly nice behavior meant he was up to something. Candor here I come.
His calm response only made me more frightened to face my parents. What would I be walking into when I finally went home? Would they really be willing to hear me out?
Tears formed in my eyes and I began to cry. Not knowing what to do, Drew just held me in his arms. Eventually he talked me into going back downstairs and made me something to eat. He made Mac and Cheese from a box. I didn’t even know he could cook.
Keys in the front door made me practically jump out of my skin. “Chill, it’s just my dad bringing me some clothes,” he tried calming me down.
Sure enough, in walked Drew’s dad with a suitcase full of stuff, “I told your mom you were spending the night with Xerxes for a few days to keep away from Bill. Make sure he’s on the same page,” his dad warned, “how are you feeling Sid?”
“Like crap,” I sulked, “I shouldn’t be here. I should be at home with my family having dinner and laughing at stupid stuff. I shouldn’t have run away.”
“I agree, but what’s done is done and you don’t want to go home right now, trust me. I talked to your dad and he’s pretty pissed off. He reported you as a runaway.”
“Great,” I sighed.
“Listen, I told Drew you can stay here for a few days okay, but after that you have to go home.”
“I know.”
“If they find out where you were this whole time…”
“They won’t,” I assured him, “I won’t say anything.”
“She won’t,” Drew backed me up.
“Don’t do anything stupid while you’re here either. Like let my son get you pregnant.”
“Psh,” Drew and I huffed at the same time, “Never that. I don’t want a baby and neither does Drew.”
“We’re not sleeping together dad,” Drew confided.
“But you are sexually active.”
“I am…she’s not,” Drew clarified, “look, it’s a long story and I really don’t want to get into it.”
His dad’s eyes flicked back and forth from Drew to me, trying to understand the dynamic of our relationship. We didn’t even understand it yet. Understanding and then a telling smile formed on his face when he glanced at Drew.
“Three days and no more than that. Drew, you sleep on the sofa.”
“Dad, I got this,” Drew laughed. His dad hugged him and then he finally left, “Okay that wasn’t embarrassing at all,” Drew shook his head.
“Your dad admires you.”
“And I admire you,” he kissed me on the cheek, “What do you want to watch?”
Drew turned on the television and in true male fashion he got sidetracked by a basketball game he found while flicking through the channels.
“Just put on whatever you want,” I shrugged.
His phone went off several times and each time he would glance at the caller ID but he wouldn’t answer. I glanced at the caller ID and saw that it was Kim. She started this slippery slope that turned me into a fugitive.
“If you don’t answer she’ll just keep calling.”
“So.”
“So, talk to her.”
“Why? Aren’t you mad at her right now? A lot of this is her fault.”
“The fight yes, me running away, no…that was all me.”
“Yeah, but you wouldn’t have done it if she hadn’t started all of this,” he pointed out, “and lets not forget how she tried to tell your dad we slept together. She did that for a reason Sid. She was hoping something like this would happen.”
“She’s in love with you.”
“So she says.”
“I believe her. She looks at you the same way I do when she thinks no one is watching.”
Drew smirked and my cheeks heated up. In a perfect world there would be nothing standing between Drew and I. We’d be free to love each other in any way we saw fit, but the reality of our situation is far from that. While my parents like Drew and his family, they don’t want me dating him. I saw it in my dad’s eyes when he realized Drew was the common denominator between Kim and I, and in my mom’s eyes when she asked me what happened with Quincy.
“Oh my God, basketball,” I groaned, “if I get sent to boarding school I won’t be able to play ball.”
“And there it is,” Drew laughed, “I was wondering when that reality was going to hit you.”
“Basketball is my life. The Candor Albright Reform School for girls doesn’t have a basketball team. They don’t have any sports really, just an obstacle course they make us run every day at five in the morning like we’re in the military.”
“I know you said the school is bad, but how bad is it?” Drew asked, concerned.
Seeing the concern in his eyes, I didn’t want to worry him. If my fate was to go back to Candor, then so be it. There’s nothing either of us can do about it. Worrying him would only make facing the inevitable worse. So I did what I always do and I downplayed how horrible Candor is in order to make him feel better.
“It’s not that bad. I made it through six years there. I’m sure two more won’t kill me,” I slapped a fake smile on my face.
I’m used to brandishing a fake smile. I complained to my dad about Candor the first year the bad things started to happen and he ignored me. The new head mistress told him I was manipulating him to come home early and he believed them.
My concerns were always dismissed so I learned to cope. I’d plant a fake smile on my face and pretend like everything was okay. They weren’t. They were far from okay, but what good is crying for help when there’s no one there to listen? My dad made up his mind about me a long time ago. I’m the troublemaker, the smart-mouth, and miss most likely to throw my future away over something stupid. Only that’s not me. I was doing fine before he and Kim decided to blow up my life.
Speaking of Kim, she continued to call Drew well into the night. He didn’t want to talk to her so he blocked her number. He said he’d talk to her tomorrow at school.
Drew’s dad told him to sleep on the sofa, but he didn’t say anything about us both sleeping on it. It pulled out into a bed. I didn’t want to be alone and lying next to him made me feel less alone in the world.
It sucked when he headed off to school the next day without me. Alone in his dad’s house, I was bored out of my mine. There’s a pool table, but no one to play with. There’s a stereo but I don’t know how to work it, and figuring out his dad’s television is next to impossible. I tapped the power button but couldn’t figure out how to get to something worth watching.
After another hour of boredom I finally figured out how to work the remote. Halfway through the third show I watched, Em called. I started not to answer her call, but I needed her wisdom.
“Hey Em.”
“Sidney, thank God you’re alright,”
“I’m fine. I’m safe,” I assured her.
“Dad called Candor. Don’t come home Sid, they’re waiting for you.”
“I know. It’s okay.”
“This is so unfair,” Em began to cry.
“Yeah, well it’s the story of my life, right?”
“He’s so angry Sid and he’s snapping on everyone.”
“Well whatever you do, stay out of his way. I love you sis.”
“I love you too,” she replied, “and Kim is gonna get what she deserves for this.”
“Don’t worry about Kim. She had a hand in this but so did my temper,” I replied, “Besides, I knew it was only a matter of time before I ended up back at Candor anyway. I guess it’s a good thing I didn’t unpack all my stuff, huh?”
Em laughed, “I’m gonna miss you punk.”
“I’m gonna miss you too.”
“I’m serious, I love you Sid.”
“Awe. I love you too Em.”
She was heading to her next class, so she got off the phone and I was back to a boring day of watching television. Three o’ clock finally rolled around and my phone rang. I expected it to be Drew and was surprised to see Quincy’s name on the caller ID. I thought he wasn’t talking to me.
“Hey,” I answered.
“Hey,” he sounded worried, “I just saw Em. She and Josh are pretty upset and she told me you ran away.”
“Temporarily,” I sulked, “I can’t even do that right.”
Quincy chuckled, “What are you doing Sid? Why is he worth all of this? I hear they’re sending you back to Candor.”
“Yep.”
“You can’t go back to that place. What if something happens to you?”
“Then my parents won’t ever have to worry about me again.”
“Stop being dramatic. They love you.”
“No, your parents love you. I’m an unwanted aggravation for my parents.”
“I want to see you,” he demanded.
“Visiting hours is from five to eight at Candor. But that’s if they ever grant me visitation.”
“No, I mean right now. Where are you?”
I walked over to the closest window and peered outside. There was a Starbucks nearby that I could send him to. Drew wouldn’t be home for another three hours and I’m bored. I gave Quincy the address to the Starbucks and told him to meet me there with my favorite coffee.
While I waited, I changed into some actual clothes, brushed my teeth and combed my hair. I snagged one of Drew’s hoodies to camouflage myself just in case and watched Starbucks to see if Quincy came alone. He did.
I made my way over to Starbucks and sat down next to him when he wasn’t looking. When he finally noticed me he smiled.
“Thank you for coming,” he slid closer to me.
“I was bored and it gave me something to do.”
“I miss you. I’m mad that you went back to Drew, but I still care about you,” Quincy peered into my eyes, “I can’t believe you’re going back to Candor.”
“I’m not surprised. I feel like my dad was just looking for a reason to send me back. Kim hit me first and I defended myself, but he didn’t care. He just kept saying he sent me to school to learn, not fight. That’s easy to say when someone’s fist isn’t gunning for your face.”
“Why did you go back to him?” Quincy asked, changing the subject. I got the feeling it’s been weighing on his mind lately.
“I told you, I love him. And you dumped me for not breaking things off with him, so I figured maybe it was the universe telling me to stick with Drew. And then he came by after you left and told me he wanted to go exclusive.”
“I was upset because I couldn’t reach you. We were together, but you still had these walls up with me. I didn’t know how to get past them.”
“You were doing fine. I had feelings for you and they were growing every day. All you had to do is be patient.”
“Then lets start over. Give me a second chance.”
“Second chance? Quincy I have a one way ticket back to hell. There’ll be no me and anybody once those goons at Candor get their hands on me. And if I make it to eighteen, I’ll never be the same girl I was when I went in. Candor changes people, and not for the better.”
In a shocking move, Quincy leaned his forehead against mine. I couldn’t breathe or move. We haven’t been this close in a long time.
“Qui-”
Before I could finish saying his name, he kissed me. He stuck his tongue in my mouth and kissed me. I tried pulling away but his hand was there to hold me in place. I tried prying his hand loose, but he was stronger than me.
Sweeping his tongue through my mouth he brought my defenses down in a matter of seconds. I don’t know how he did it, but he managed to take my breath away. And long after the kiss was over, my eyes remained shut, savoring the way it felt.
When I finally opened my eyes, his piercing baby blues finished me off. I couldn’t even form a sentence, let along an intelligent thought.
“You shouldn’t have done that,” I sighed.
“Maybe, but at least now I have your full attention.”
“I’m with Drew.”
“I know, but I’m determined to change that.”
“Why?”
“Because I know what I want.”
Quincy can be aggressive when he really wants something. Kissing him made me realize I have strong feelings for him. Feelings I purposely shoved to the back of my mind for Drew. Feelings I have no intentions of acting on.
“Write me,” I told him, texting him the address to Candor, “If you really want to be in my life, be my friend first and write me.”
Quincy nodded and then he caught me up on everything that’s happening at school. He and Drew got into it over me and the whole school now knows I’m on a one-way trip back to boarding school. Apparently Kim is elated with the idea because she’s hoping it means she gets to have Drew all to herself.
ns 15.158.61.42da2
