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【凌家動物園 III 小強星人也求愛】爆炸頭不要來
By 喵芭渴死姬
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9-3. 四人行之有黃金！991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8gQ3LzyvJG
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「嗚咿——」才跨出纜車塔台，體型單薄嬌小的喵喵仙貝就被強風吹得整個人往外飄移，幸好泰迪熊眼明手快將他拉回來，卻仍嚇得他緊巴住哥哥的腰抖抖哭道：「這、這、這、這風也太大啦！」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXMVVwmAmnI
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「寶貝兒到哥這來。」泰迪熊輕拍胸口示意道，喵喵仙貝便立即變回小奶貓，快速鑽進哥哥的衣襟躲好，整個小貓身被包得嚴嚴實實，只露出一顆戴著雪帽的小貓頭，兩人這般互動自是又叮叮叮加了恩愛放閃度與萌物指數。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzHTlTcodXw
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「真不愧是最高的六十九號峰啊！」個頭也矮小的肉盾，因矮人族先天骨質密度高而穩如八方地站在前方。他抬起反光眼鏡觀望呼嘯的風雪後，就轉頭朝塞倫伸出手，「小倫，哥牽你……」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1mNduC1Ipz
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話未說完，一陣強風襲來吹開他的雪衣連身帽，將又大又綠的爆炸頭吹成刺蝟頭，活像是被打歪的綠髮仙道，緊接著，風雪隨之轉往肉盾直直打去，於是爆炸頭當場進化了。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡip3vR7R0fh
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「喵哈哈哈哈！豬頭登的頭又更大惹喵！」喵喵仙貝用小肉球指著幾乎融入背景的巨型雪人頭，十分沒良心地噴淚狂笑。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrTeIjf08i4
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「噗哈！連大自然的仇恨都可以招嗎？」塞倫忍不住笑到肚痛捧腹。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbEfRL5VJsM
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「呵。」竟連泰迪熊都微勾了嘴角，顯然十分滿意某豬頭中午講錯話的現世報。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ05fYouzOve
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唉，老天不懂欣賞哥的帥頭啊！肉盾的內心淌血了。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCk3czYHgY2
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一片笑聲中，只有育發出不同的意見，「唔，好像冰淇淋。」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlWW3BGjF7d
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現場頓時化成無聲的囧。這吃貨能不能有一刻別想著吃啊？991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcVev7QS359
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為免育真的提出吃冰淇淋的要求，塞倫連忙幫肉盾拍掉頭上的積雪。肉盾也趕緊掏出花頭巾，省得雪衣帽又被吹開。誰知，他才要往頭上套時，被凍僵的手指竟不小心一鬆，就讓花頭巾隨風飄去。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYgROadmGVX
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「糟糕！」肉盾想追回花頭巾，卻見一道風雪又要往自己吹來，便只好慌張地套回雪衣帽，眼睜睜看著花巾消失在遠方。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmF0sMJUCSv
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「算了，大不了我把帽子抓緊點。」肉盾一手抓著領口試圖包緊頭，卻也為接下來的路程造成些許不便。在第N隻野生怪被打得只剩幾格血後，肉盾忍不住先收回愛的小手，甩了甩痠極的右手，苦著臉抱怨：「只有一隻手真不方便啊！」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOWanphsUj2
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「誰叫你笨笨讓頭巾飛走惹喵？」躲在哥哥胸前的喵喵仙貝，揮著小喵掌放出幾顆小火球後，就接著說：「或是尼要頂著雪人頭打群戰也可以喔喵。」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡieVkyDOaY3
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「冰淇淋頭。」被勒令跟緊祭司的育再次小聲道。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSqu2EuQ98k
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「……」四人決定假裝沒聽到。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNJkTr8wzVn
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「我想到了。」等火麒麟把怪滅了後，塞倫從包裡掏出針線和兩條棉繩，半跪在肉盾面前以便行事，「雖然只是初級裁縫，但縫個繩子還行，這樣你直接綁緊就好了。」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu0H85dDoTx
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「喔，小倫好賢慧啊！」肉盾頓時感動得激動含淚道：「哥真是世上最幸福的男人了！」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnpBR0idFNk
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「叮！」伴著雪花飄下愛心雨的系統音也歡樂響起，「玩家塞倫貼心幫曖昧對象玩家肉盾阿弗羅縫衣，兩人感情升溫，獲得稱號《秀奸情的曖昧》，曖昧等級在加倍祝福下由7級升至9級，歡迎玩家再接再厲直奔奸夫淫夫的終點唷～♥」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr0XOZJQ9qO
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「……」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5xC7RgQMWO
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「哇啊！」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7uFpl6ZBHE
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「抱歉，不小心刺到了。」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEUKkOhM5vP
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「沒關係，這是小倫對哥的愛，哥絕不會生氣的。」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpNdbjNiGdj
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「……」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcL8RGxRqvw
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「唉呀！」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4MKHjqmfEa
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「抱歉，風雪太大看不清楚。」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHoOsDtSORI
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隊友間雖無法以技能攻擊彼此，卻能以純物理方式造成痛感而不失血。因此，目睹過程的喵喵仙貝與育，極有默契地憋笑對視一眼。他們敢作證發誓——塞倫絕非有意手滑刺到肉盾，而是刻・意・的！991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ07WfRSQr77
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就在這一路打打鬧鬧下，他們終於來到艾瓦巨洞。一踏入洞穴，濃重硫磺味的熱氣就迎面撲來，不僅瞬間烘乾了身上的積雪，還烘得他們汗如雨下。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡswQENi6Kgf
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「Man！這溫差也太誇張了吧？」肉盾的爆炸頭本就較常人悶熱，此時他更難受得立刻脫下雪衣帽。其他人也紛紛換回平日裝備，恢復人形的喵喵仙貝還忍痛收起最愛的毛茸茸貓咪裝，穿上輕薄涼爽的法師短袍，露出白嫩四肢與纖細腰身。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjvzVvswPb7
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「窩現在也想疵冰惹啦。」喵喵仙貝舔著有些乾燥的嘴唇，一旁的育連忙點頭附和。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbWaZq6B4JD
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「寶貝兒乖，現在吃冰會更不舒服。」泰迪熊立刻拿出幾瓶有清涼降火功效的椰子汁，「先喝這舒緩一下。」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡANi5WNQNVx
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「以這個熱度來看，裡面的怪應該是火屬性吧。」塞倫收回火麒麟，改召喚冰晶妖與可於五尺內釋放水粒子的水元素，頓時讓他們如吹冷氣般舒爽起來。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLNU8acrbUb
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待一切就緒後，他們才開始往裡走去。興許是這山上多是冰系怪，洞裡的溫度又太熱，因此他們一路順利無波地走到最底的石門前，而這自然也代表了門後的怪獸恐怕不是普通的Boss。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsbTzvF40qC
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「但這不是重複性任務嗎？這種任務很少要打高難度的Boss。」塞倫忽覺不太對勁地蹙眉。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKmLYpfN3U1
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「對耶，或只是很多的菁英怪？」喵喵仙貝見育的神情凝重，便偏頭疑惑問：「小育哥者摸惹？」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHnn49SiVEe
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「嗯……有、有種奇怪的感覺。」育緊張地揪住泰迪熊的袖擺，顯然是在對方的不得不順手餵食下，把人家當成臨時奶爸兼保鏢了。喵喵仙貝注意到育的舉動，卻也只能無奈地嘟起嘴，看在這人失憶的份上暫時不計較。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLsEQbQ71bz
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「放心，有哥在。」肉盾拍拍頂上的爆炸頭傻笑道：「反正兵來將打，水來土掩，沒問題的！」991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK0qPG74hsU
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「是『水來吐鹽』啦！」喵喵仙貝自認正確地糾正道。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ53dOeiEqVi
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「喔，是這樣啊。」肉盾抓抓臉似乎又混淆了。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpCZIPLDdof
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「呃……」見泰迪熊仍含笑似沒打算糾正，塞倫便把話吞回去暗嘆，有這樣縱容溺愛的哥哥，那孩子的中文會學得好才怪。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIrYwTMJEwJ
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肉盾率先小心推開石門，滿室璀璨的金幣山瞬間印入眼簾，差點閃瞎幾人的眼。他們眨了又眨眼，才終於見到一隻不知是狗還是虎的龐然大物正臥在金幣上發出如雷鼾聲，擱在臉邊的爪子比他們的頭都還巨大。喵喵仙貝張嘴似要說什麼，卻在泰迪熊的示意下頓住，於是他們紛紛低頭在隊伍頻道裡開會討論——991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6TmSd98JD3
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：牠在睡覺耶～OAO』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMkzvZL0FRY
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『【隊伍】泰迪熊餅乾：不好打。』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA4fG5gpUfr
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：泰看一眼就知道啦？』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXcghIKrVHI
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：我哥是戰術師啊，可以看到怪和隊友的戰鬥數值。』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE8wPDTRgVA
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戰術師？！這是《奧普斯》最高難度的特殊專業，除了需有極高的戳破盲腸度之外，還得通過多種任務考驗才能取得資格，據說全服沒幾個玩家拿到。塞倫驚訝地瞧了眼泰迪熊，真看不出那張面癱臉能識破這遊戲的什麼惡搞真相，但也難怪這人能從容應付暴走怪群的混戰了。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlyv8t8do3P
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：真不愧是泰啊！』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIvn0aCOjKH
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『【隊伍】塞倫：我看看寵物管家有沒有牠的資料。』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcVoCtrvY5A
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：好！』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjNWld0GXVb
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塞倫召喚出《寵物管家》往石室內的巨獸掃了下，資料面板上便顯示出掃描結果——991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKsaHi22INL
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『【寵物管家小百科】冥界一頭犬：Lv 90級Boss怪。綽號小一，是看守地獄惡鬼的冥獸之一，性格憨萌愛撒嬌，為地府閻王之子的寵物，嗜好是散步、追骨頭、溜主人。有兩個弟弟分別是冥界二頭犬、冥界三頭犬。』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRbSsIRMkFX
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又是地府寵物？塞倫與肉盾皆默了，這不會也是逃出來的吧，那什麼閻王兒子怎麼老是不拴好寵物啊？991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡixcCpL70Mo
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：這個可以當寵物？OAO』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxgNVAfagFO
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：會不會跟兔吉拉一樣，打傷會扣地府好感值？』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQKB6Jc1D1j
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『【隊伍】塞倫：這樣還要打嗎？』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdaBsapW6mM
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：要不我們偷溜進去收完東西就閃？』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbBmjJLkTIy
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『【隊伍】泰迪熊餅乾：你留在門外等。』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1lM2Qj2L9K
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：Boss不懂哥的帥頭啊～:'-( 』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡp1fNStgG3u
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『【隊伍】NPC《育？》：我也在門外等。』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ14qIAcmZ6s
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四人不明所以地朝育望去，只見他的臉色比方才越加難看了，猜想大概是膽小所致，便隨了他。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUpxXnR40es
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『【隊伍】泰迪熊餅乾：共需20顆，我們各拿6-7顆，一起行動別分太開。』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq8Q5jxgZCe
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：好～OwO』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKDI6uSBRym
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『【隊伍】塞倫：嗯。』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡElJWQgAqJ1
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既然沒要戰鬥，塞倫便也沒收回寵物管家，僅留著吹冷氣用的冰晶妖。泰迪熊上了團體加速術以降低踏步的聲響後，三人便抬腳跨入室內。半秒後，他們滿臉黑線地一同退出石室。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP5LFkvLuhB
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『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：？？？』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡybuKbP8f3n
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『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：裡面太亮啦！真的被閃瞎啦啊啊啊啊啊啊！！QAQQQQQ』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8efbAMhxtv
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQOBPSjXaap
『【隊伍】塞倫：除了金光就是金光，其他什麼都看不到。』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡClVRw3PdVk
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD0xkCEyL2O
『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：原來說要有心理準備是指這個嗎？QAQ』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡttDEHipbhy
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『【隊伍】泰迪熊餅乾：戴眼鏡的試試。』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBpOSTyCSpz
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡx9DwRSyZlD
『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：啊！黃金懂哥的帥眼鏡啊～』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqBVlquMmET
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7zm2lk9SaG
打著只要不吵醒Boss就不會招仇恨的試驗心態，肉盾戰戰兢兢地往門內一站，又小小走了幾步路，發現一頭犬果真毫無動靜，便朝他們比了個大拇指，其他三人才放心地跟進室內，只有育依舊不安地表示要留在門外。991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy6XnTg9kpQ
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOoHVmQGbQm
『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：咦欸？現在好像不怎麼刺眼了耶OAO』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsM1ViuoBEG
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqValmBhMU7
『【隊伍】塞倫：真的比剛才能看見東西了。』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOtKFTaNLm6
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡObsXWhkwro
『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：該不會豬頭眼鏡又有什麼特殊效果吧？』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbglTj70jS3
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzIGKuoE3J2
『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：啊哈！哥的造型真多功能！』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ694gAPhwGA
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxxjqLxVzaP
『【隊伍】泰迪熊餅乾：花椰菜光合作用。』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7vqrVSXtkw
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFBcSJD86bz
『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：泰……Q^Q』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi39HhmFrN3
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdlit4aqZxL
塞倫無語驚悚了，剛那張面癱臉是在開玩笑嗎？雖說不怎麼好笑，但這人難不成其實是冷面笑匠？這想法才起，就見喵喵仙貝乾笑地打出一句話——991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhx8LbBQxoP
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIEunGawCM7
『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：我猜我哥大概要真相了OwO』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡg7KhwyksCz
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2vEhf8Bdpm
不會吧？塞倫才想完下一秒，兩串鮮黃明亮的系統公告就跳入頻道——991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhFMJ4NgQGR
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuqWGDv4T3a
『【隊伍】系統：叮！玩家泰迪熊餅乾不戳則已一戳驚人，一語道破本遊戲的高度機密之一——特殊裝備《爆炸頭》的隱藏屬性，獲得經驗值+10000，但由於玩家泰迪熊餅乾的戳破盲腸度已達最高值，故無法再升數值，請玩家再接再厲發展其他指數，勿再戳爆系統的盲腸啦～（By系統負責人）』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTurYyJKk6H
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIv3XTX7Sur
『【隊伍】系統：叮！玩家肉盾阿弗羅的特殊裝備《爆炸頭》被識破玄機，升級為《超爆炸頭+1》，歡迎玩家再接再厲繼續挖掘各種神奇功能唷～（By系統負責人）』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhseXK7pkrR
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一戳就戳中高度機密真相？這下塞倫總算明白泰迪熊是如何達到戰術師門檻了，果真是惦惦吃三碗公！991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkCIs65GB5l
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3iO6lOvIbg
『【隊伍】喵喵仙貝：噗！豬頭的爆炸頭好像又更大惹耶～OwO』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5Wlw1GVEc2
991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS2MsbboQKW
『【隊伍】肉盾阿弗羅：沒辦法，哥的頭太帥，注定要如此多舛～ (╭￣3￣)╭♥』991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvEH4wNI5uU
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噗呵！望向撥著超Q翹瀏海自認帥氣的肉盾，塞倫忍不住失笑了，這爆炸豬頭還真是樂天的傢伙啊！991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuwTJDfNYYx
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ε٩(๑> ₃ <)۶з Σ>—(〃°ω°〃)♥ → (╭￣3￣)╭♥ σ ﾟ∀ ﾟ) ﾟ∀ﾟ)σ ლ（╹ε╹ლ）
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後記：
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泰勾都惦惦疵三碗公啦～AWA（誤會到哪去？＃991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVt6BI8iv4L
下一篇打Boss囉！991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡguepMUFTlK
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旅行期間得腸胃炎真是苦得要人命qwq991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyteQ3QSGDH
拉了一天又發燒一整晚，半夜還爬起來吐OTZ991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Hz6y6S1Bv
可惡啊！最好肥肉也有變少！！991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbFZrAqU3rJ
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★【凌家動物園系列】
1.花心豹吃兔計畫 — 付墨X凌小兔 （作品名：小兔不吃回頭草）991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoLYMaaIJcm
2.大貓小貓相親記 — 泰特斯X拉貝爾 （作品名：恃寵而傲嬌）991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxtNMT6x63Y
3.小強星人也求愛 — 艾登X席倫 （作品名：爆炸頭不要來）991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq8BLJxZQvn
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歡迎追蹤噗浪和FB粉絲頁>////<991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9gDcoGWgJj
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噗浪：http://www.plurk.com/sakuhyde991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4tJ6IxeDJI
FB粉絲頁：https://www.facebook.com/meowbarksky991Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSgQ6RD3UTc
by 喵芭渴死姬 / 11.24.2015
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