A trip to Sri Lanka
I decided to concentrate on my studies so that I would not think about her. I passed all the exams and did my final year internship. I finally finished my studies. My parents decided that we could go to Sri Lanka to celebrate my graduation and attend my cousin's puberty ceremony. It had been almost five years that we did not go there. All the family on my mother's side live there so I was really eager to see them again. We booked the tickets and we were all set to go there. We took a direct flight but it still took twelve hours to get to the Colombo international airport.
When we landed, I was really tired. My legs were hurting me each time I was trying to make a step. My ears were in pain. I could hardly understand what other people were saying. As soon as we came out of the airport, the heat started to burn our bodies. It was really hot. My grandfather was waiting for us. I could see that he was not in good shape. He lost weight. The wrinkles and rings on his face showed that he was tired. We headed to our house in Anaicoddai. The roads were smooth for driving. When we had come five years ago, I remember how bad the roads had been. Because of the rocks and potholes on the roads, we were all jumping inside the car. Tourism is really important for this country therefore modernizing roads is compulsory.
Once we reached our destination, I saw somebody waiting at the entrance of the house. It was my grandmother. She was also weak. She could not walk for long distances because she needed a knee replacement. However, the surgeries on that part of the body are not all successful that is why she chose not to have one. Furthermore, she was not eating properly. As we only came a few times to Sri Lanka for summer holidays, I never really knew what kind of person she was. It was high time for me to know more about her. Indeed, she was most of the time on her bed, sleeping or deeply thinking about something. I decided to talk more with her. Even though my grandmother and grandfather looked mature, they were still like children. Sometimes they would fight for silly reasons. For example, a conflict would start if my grandfather did not choose correct vegetables from the market. Indeed, my grandmother was really picky on that, she wanted each vegetable to be chosen according to criteria. For example, she would complain that to select the okras, the edge of the vegetables should be able to break easily. My grandfather would answer that he could not just break the vegetable in front of the merchants. Anyway, I learnt a lot from them because their small fights were in fact an expression of the love towards each other.
While we were there, I wanted to make everybody happy. I really liked to engage in conversations with people. The latter considered me as an adult so they were talking to me as if I was equal to them, I really liked that feeling. When we came five years ago, I was not able to enter the discussions of adults. I suppose that with time, I became more mature and people respected me because I graduated.
We started to do the preparation for the puberty ceremony. My cousin, Malini, really changed. I still remember when she was younger, she used to be naughty and made everybody laugh. She turned into a woman, a calm and bold lady. We decided to do the ceremony in my grandfather's house. I tried to help as far as I could. We had to put the decorations and the chairs.
One day, a woman came to help us with the preparations. She knew my father and talked to him. I could see that she did not like me with the way she stared at me. I did not know the reason but she despised me. We started to put big green floor coverings outside the house. Putting those kind of carpets in that vast area seemed to be a difficult task. We had to choose the correct sizes and be able to fill the whole area with the given material. Suddenly, she asked me to come and hold one mat with her. I did not understand how she wanted to put the piece of coarse material. Then, she dropped the large rug and told my father: "You should let your son do some housework, he does not even know how to put a mat. He will remain big if he does not do any housework. It is not because he has graduated in a foreign country that he is superior to people here. I do not know what they learn in those foreign countries." I angrily looked at her and replied: "You want to tell something about me, then talk to me face to face. It is true maybe I do not know a lot of works like these. I respect people who study here and who are able to get a job here. I have a great opinion of people doing their work wholeheartedly, and this including all the existing jobs. I do not know why you despise people like me. We also have to work hard to get a job. Living in a foreign country does not mean that we live without suffering. Like here, people live a life full of work and stress. Do you know that a lot of people who fled Sri Lanka to France are doing cleaning works? I am aware of their hardships. I am lucky that I was able to get a good education. Never underestimate people like me, I am ready to learn. I am strong because I have seen my parents' pain to give me a good life. About my weight, it is none of your business. I am maybe fat but who told you that big people cannot do any housework? Now, leave that mat and come tomorrow to see the result." She mumbled words and left. I was quite impressed with myself. Anger helped me to do an incredible speech in my mother tongue. After thinking for a few minutes, I found a way to cover the wide area and started to apply my reasoning. After a few hours, I finished. When the woman came back the next day, she saw the results, told some criticisms and then went to do another work. I did not mind and carried on to help with the preparations.
The puberty ceremony of my cousin went well. My mother wanted to go with the whole family to the Nallur Kandaswamy temple. We found a time when everybody was available and headed towards the temple. It was a festival day called the "Ther Thiruvila" so there was a lot of people, amongst which many tourists. We were following the crowd. At one point, we wanted to take a break and we stopped in a place where there was less sunshine. The people were continuing to walk behind the silver throne called the "Simmasanam". Some devotees were shouting 'Aro hara' while praying the god. The way they worshipped the gods was really inspirational. At the same time, I felt bad to see that some people only came to the temple to take photos.
I was looking at the people in the gathering, that is when I saw Yazhini again. At first, I saw a face that stood out from the crowd, I was dubious whether it was her or not. After focusing my vision on her, I was sure. Yazhini was so different from the first day I saw her. She was wearing a red full sari. The latter was simple but she looked stunning in it. She wore her long hair in a unique plait. A black bindi in the middle of her forehead showed her like a completely different person. She walked in a very elegant way, making small springy steps. She was praying the god with her hands together. However, her eyes were open and she was smiling. This time, her face expression and her outfit made me feel respect and devotion. I wanted to follow her but I needed to stay with my family. I tried to convince my family to go back in the crowd but it was too late, I lost track of Yazhini. She was gone, gone again. Unfortunately, after that day, I did not see Yazhini in Sri Lanka. We returned back to France. After seeing her for the second time, I learnt something new. Even though respect mostly comes from our behaviour, our appearance also plays an important role. Therefore, we should try our utmost to look good.
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