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The fear of the past
I got up at 10am as every Saturday, I slept well. My day was painstakingly planned as I had a lot of things to do.
First, I had to go to the store to buy the necessary groceries for the next week. I walked to the shops which were 25 minutes from my home. Walking alone is really great, especially when it is cold outside. It was cloudy and cold so I enjoyed the moment. There were not many people on the roads, the only noise was the one coming from the cars. While walking, I saw somebody near the opposite traffic lights. It was Mary. She had been my classmate in high school. At the time, I would mostly spend my time alone. Mary was one of the few people to whom I talked. She used to have medium grades, just what was necessary to pass. She liked rock music and had a band. I never attended her concerts but she had talent for sure judging from her popularity in high school. She was waiting on the opposite pedestrian crossing and did not notice me. She was looking at the cars which were crossing her way. Her blue eyes were shining. The colour and the way she looked at people made her eyes the main attraction of her face. She was playing with her straight blond hair. She was used to do that when she had been in a hurry or in a situation of stress. I saw some red lipstick on her small lips. This was strange as she was not used to put lipsticks at the time, but it looked good on her. In fact, it gave her a kind of a professional look.
The pedestrian signal turned green, it was time to cross. I started walking and looked into her eyes. She recognized me and we stopped in the middle of the road. It had been so much time but we were still able to recognize each other. We decided to walk together for some time. It was so nice to talk about our past time and the moments we enjoyed with our friends. She told me about her boyfriend Victor and said that she could not find a good job but that she was still making ends meet.
This is what would have occured if I was like most people but this is not what happened. When we started to walk opposite to each other on the pedestrian crossing, I did not look into her eyes. When she came closer, I just glimpsed at her. I could see her eyes focusing on me. She frowned in a certain way that made me understand that she had recognized me. I did not stop, ignored her and continued on my way. We did not even talk.
Anyway, these kinds of events happen often in my life. Each time, I just feel bad and regret not talking with the person that I have known before. Why do I react like this? I do not know. Maybe because of my fear of the past or perhaps because of my unsociability. Anyway, I carried on and started shopping. Twenty minutes were enough to get all the items that I needed. I checked out and was on the way back home. The next big highlight of the day was the meeting with my previous friends from my secondary-school private English tuition center.
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