Sitting on the roof, staring up at the sky. Why did you do something so reckless? Did you know you'd die that night? It took only one night to rip you from my arms. It was now the first night after you died. I usually loved the roof, but all I could do was think of you. It was my first night alone. I keep thinking I hear your voice and I turn with hope. The ember of hope that you'll be right there when I turn around. The hope is what hurts most, because when you hope all it does it tear you apart like a wild animal. I look up at the starry skies every star twinkling a different story.
"Why did you do it?" I whispered to the sky like you could hear me.
"Why did you leave me!" I yell, on my knees pleading to hear your voice. But what I wanted to hear most was your passionate laugh. It was always my favorite sound, and now dreadful silence is all that remains. The world feels like a shell of what was without you. Every color is muted and grey. At least I have the stars, they make me feel at home. They remind me of your eyes. Your dark indigo eyes that mesmerized me so I couldn't look away. My eyes feel hot, I have a lump in my throat. My eyes go blurry and I dont realize I'm crying until tears hit my skirt and sink into the black fabric.
"Did you think I was kidding when I said I couldn't live without you?" I sob silently.
I stand at the edge looking up at the calming denim sky. I spread out my arms like wings and feel the wind. I back up to the very edge, with only the tips of my feet on the ledge. I calm my muscles and give into the world, I feel my feet leave the ground. I fall with freedom looking at the welcoming stars. My feet are above my head, and I can see my tears fly above me like diamonds. I put my hand up to frame the sky.
"I've always loved the stars, and now it will be night forever, I'll never have to see the sun rise again"
Ive always loved the stars but I've loved you more
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