「咁你呢，又點呀？」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7DaKErNrOZ
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7Mv5gUfjiU
阿樂問。這段時間，他和青青接觸得不多，他們的吃飯時間，各有各。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdovdRYtijb
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC8OK1lmWBn
「托賴，幾好吖。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt0Ahy0Xonm
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡruIOV7jBYf
「你咁樣叫幾好？咪玩啦。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVCF26ZdNQv
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFzC35Iu9R2
即使不夠光，但阿樂還是看得出青青的憔悴，突然又說：「上磅睇吓。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS7zbMGY8Ad
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡH15spFTkSs
阿樂想確認是不是他的錯覺——他覺得青青越來越瘦。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtACdkhRmNj
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSMfAZMV7Jr
然後搬出體重磅，叫她站上去，電子屏幕顯示37.1kg，身高只得米五多一點的她其實不特別瘦，只是脂肪輕。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9uxQ4cjGNS
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJnTGEG1viq
「搞咩啊，宜家仲要係夜晚，啫係已經重咗……639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuHbCIimgVa
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKGPhXQ4YSR
我煮啲飯唔好食咩？你遲啲返到屋企，你阿媽會唔會以為我哋唔俾飽飯你食㗎？」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDmeZrsohjq
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlLJTifVoKH
阿樂卻知道她的臉一點點地削下去，原本包得很的圓臉已經消減，和她Instagram的舊相差很遠。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1TWdhVAHmr
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDZbtVlzzE8
「好食吖，已經慢慢食多咗㗎啦！未到啫未到啫。」她說。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxz2jrzNyPJ
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6LSZNOVwk7
失戀之後，青青的身體差了很多。晚上失眠只在被窩裏漆黑地消耗入睡的耐心，入睡之後卻不斷醒來，有時被雨聲吵醒，有時是發夢嚇醒，有時就是不知何故就醒，每天都只能睡一會兒。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMG4nrCLn5R
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdJswoFUREJ
白天的胃口不是特別好，總感覺整個人都很暈。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5UOkEwlJGR
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1wOz3bTQdX
她有吃飯，但也就是為了活命吃的，有時感覺不到餓就隨便吃兩口，即使阿樂煮得很好。晚上又會忽然有心癮暴食，吃完之後又覺得愧疚。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhwPtNtDyyG
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh0IiH6kC4O
她的憔悴體現在臉上，眼皮的膠原蛋白流失，眼窩就變深，令她的雙眼皮有點老氣。黑眼圈也明顯，連上眼皮都像塗了大地色系眼影一樣。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ62JLALwlwd
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt4ZvmnlkUN
月經來了一個多星期後，下體又少量出血，不知何故；頭髮大把大把的掉，面臨少年脫髮危機；胃在反覆的飽和餓之間，經常隱隱作痛。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2kvoxkXwVO
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpL7PPO2KWZ
每天都不想做任何事。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3wInfkOYUZ
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwPfWVDEAHG
如果看數字，她確實跌磅了，上年的八月她比現在重五公斤。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxyBkHa8j17
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVpJzoewsfw
明明，她是她家人、朋友的寶，為什麼要這樣自我折磨呢？看來脫落的不只是曲折的頭髮，看來還有智商和理智……639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzJqcnUFYm9
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrkH5qOmmSn
明明，她很清楚，就算她橫屍街頭，已離棄她的人都不會在意，最多像看新聞那樣心裏閃過一刻的惻然，假裝悲情地歎一口氣，然後遺忘她的存在、過自己的快活日子。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡidY49FICsU
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiclJTsNMDy
阿樂向青青投向懷疑的眼神，她再強調：639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡENQcWOnOlP
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzDGRe41lrk
「放心啦，邊睇得出。而且，我已經有食返多啲嘢啦。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmjFdL6QsvH
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9vCZra5yEW
「係咪酸嘢易入口啲？聽日煲番茄湯？」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOlSfv3mI1e
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡofYFswnPWH
「好——」她的聲音戛然而止，又說：「我諗緊聽日出唔出街。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEjYLvl1flr
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhe6B0pQ5jQ
最近的好多事，她都不想和好朋友說，因為其實也只是小事吧；而且，她的驕傲不允許她說太多真心的脆弱。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡw7x9VpoEPr
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡprsx0RQMrW
此刻的環境，如阿樂剖白心聲那樣，感染了她，突然覺得晚上就應該大肆地分享，好的壞的也是。阿樂和她只相識了兩個月，她感覺可以在他面前不用握緊無謂的自尊。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaK3EeJpC7t
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡc96rjSFckM
何況，他們如此親厚。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeAKHhp6d3B
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt3CSZMy7Hq
阿樂問：「去邊？」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtkfrCjVw7E
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFhjsWZ0xcM
青青站起，去房拿出電話，決定給阿樂看她的WhatsApp對話。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQta8fviapv
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2fudUoFfoI
她的一個中學同學Sean，從朋友處知道她失戀，然後開始頻繁地找她聊天，講一些曖昧的話。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzWdI7NsY9o
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyXJGVbjpwF
青青直接問：「你想媾我？」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs2DwaxVmKQ
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSytlX87Qod
Sean回答：639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLuxv7i4neX
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyZ9QUTJ8Vy
「係。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxwSqZv6lUE
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQgXf1irkrR
以前中學嗰陣我已經鍾意你，諗住DSE完就同你表白。但你嗰時已經有男朋友。所以，我都係冇講到出口，淨係Grad Din嗰陣揾咗你影相。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBem5sLcMKZ
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk5QBYgLSIR
隔了兩小時，Sean見青青未有回覆，又道：639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡopJa67mUW0
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNfgfkgrR4q
「不如我哋聽日出嚟食餐飯？」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbQyAkzKCJC
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuit1pXVQ9H
阿樂看完後，說：「佢都幾積極吖，去吓囉。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8Jp7Gnf6IR
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFgs1lWGCnq
他完全沒有吃醋、難過。他認清，情感一時的高温驅使他對青青有意，但短短十幾天的時間已足以冷卻。反而，如今她聽他講心事，他也想做一樣的事。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHvzhhgO7VA
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjkk5klDodC
「唔知啊……好突然啊好似。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT8adpLcTHV
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs1zphgvhYu
除了通識分組同一班、初中曾經同過班，青青和Sean根本沒有太多接觸，她都不知道他喜歡她什麼。不，應該說，她都不太認識Sean，她只知他成績不錯、朋友不少；長相若不是查看了Instagram，可能也陌生得記不起來。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAyWTjDTQLs
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJs5kQh2yUg
「想試咪去囉。」阿樂鼓勵。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOYj4iBlGFt
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOndlOpH5QD
「想試啊，但係，又唔敢。」青青停頓數秒，又講：「都係算啦，唔會得㗎啦。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOj9waOO0NS
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRJKABSnzm4
她突然直覺和Sean不會後續了，她突然覺得毫無心思，在這寧靜的空間裏，分辨自己的念頭。她回覆Sean：639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaKs66FCwjb
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ86vZsQMMdW
「Sorry，我唔想。多謝你。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6YWQvqm1Q7
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1XMOitayax
阿樂邊看青青看電話，邊調侃她：639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdatgnV5csR
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMzCWpUpD6G
「咁我咪好好彩，話哂你都肯試。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡme9spydrCD
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYZVsprnHWS
「係呀係呀。」她也笑。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpnyDWh4V8V
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUQlA0goJN8
阿樂質疑：639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1A2dS1XZp9
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ03Es7HdvPv
「點解唔敢呀？唔係叫我狗衝㗎咩，要勇敢㗎嘛？」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgr5WSEjPNc
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXhQdqPpPjc
青青思考，然後緩緩地道：639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmLMfthhW6b
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡskYUhXBP7l
「我好驚啊因為。我太垃圾啦。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnDI3vqVBNQ
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbyuPapjLZQ
啫係，我成日都覺得，無論幾鍾意都好，最後都係會走咁。我頂唔順呀，我份人好撚老土㗎！拍拖要拍到八十歲，一生一世㗎嘛。但可能，真係太天真，宜家又仲咁後生。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ72P26cwBKN
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7gam6g8Z2y
我好唔鍾意呢一個過程——好唔容易先至全心全意認定一個人，由冷漠去到開始熱情、開始信任對方，然後佢就走咗去。其實係咪我問題？係唔係好易接受㗎？639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnPOm8lbFz6
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCwbzaWNVh4
因為佢，好似一啲都冇唔捨得我啊。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy8uIpMV8NR
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSKrZyRYDbi
青青緊盯前方的電視，阿樂見狀，突然醒起什麼似的，開啟電視，又放了一隻DVD進去。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTYoRJ2KmMn
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ1VX6PUqXW
畫面出現一個火爐，火在熊熊燃燒。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnRyBQay5kv
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsHr5ota6ts
「搞咩啊？」青青不解。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRTO9irmI0a
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo51niN8P5D
「之前買咗呢隻碟，播住睇，感覺個人會温暖啲。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYDKCqYQgle
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8MtmcjOPdI
「宜家夏天喎Ching！」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡncMTSyyxIp
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmjmRGGntzS
「你個心咁凍，啱㗎啦。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4FByv287y
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG12pRPWcIw
阿樂微笑，青青覺得很奇異。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIUSYDJTUl8
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡigXAx0B1k4
電視上的火光在搖動，映在了他們的眼裏，也透着橙紅色的活潑。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoad8iyJi3I
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnoLjZfMuc2
「OK啦。」她的心沒有變暖，但確實覺得很有趣，竟有人花錢買這種碟看。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUmG8eKWodF
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNgmoCF3YJI
「因為咁，所以唔信人？」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1a3yWQRdGh
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpWAJkfQvLD
阿樂回到剛才的話題，青青正色：639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDM3x0J8Y1h
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRFYg7lUuU6
「係啊，好似覺得，無論對方幾愛，到最後都係會走。佢夠話愛我一生一世啦，夠話以後淨係愛我一個啦……起初唔信㗎我，後來我信，之後佢就飛咗我啦。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMecHGnqJxG
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjZQVxtTZwR
頂……我成個怨婦咁。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgGz8w1x4eY
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWjYDke40Ny
青青自嘲。乾癟癟地「哈」了一下。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOBwq5ZkXGq
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4UpS2G70tm
她發現自己有些恐懼。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwFVsvi38dp
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡA2JF2u0Ivn
到底，曾經甜蜜如Matt的愛意，最後也化煙。明明是Matt追求青青、首先表達愛意，亦在戀愛中對她極好，令信心不足的她從懷疑到沉淪。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxIBjHXWKdo
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡup6NwLGjUk
明明是他先到來入侵她的生活。仿佛，二人為新居添置不同的傢俬和私人物品一樣，眼見室內環境已經非常完善；但他宣佈要走，隨即撤離其私人物品，卻留下共同購買的傢俬，供她睹物思人、念記舊時歡喜；她卻因這居室過分和暖而心無怨懟，無法盡興地發洩情緒，獨得傷心在無眠夜裏壓着她。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdC9ThoZmxX
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqEi3EdSGEm
最後，Matt離開。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0sGVIwp0dz
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaqhVOYJz3a
她可笑地見證了這一段關係的興落，從築起到繁華，最終傾頹。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUffSl1lqYX
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBNxAh2caSa
她始知，原來，愛情是這樣的一回事。愛，兩個人，開心，然後不開心。某些Happy ending，唯有期望將來會有。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIlO0oaFhW7
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd9Y8Ibktxi
阿樂破了她的處，沒有令她長大，那不過是幾個姿勢、幾番高潮、幾潭愛液，處女膜破裂，只是暫時的生理性疼痛。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGEJ2EVBGGD
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJfJpfLOGrK
但是，Matt的光臨與離任，真令她成為大人——不是好人、不是壞人，僅僅是一個「大人」，她開始明白許多道理，那些她有過的天真的熱愛，都冷硬起來，被摔到地上粉碎得無法拼湊，像攤開手就忘情飛揚的骨灰。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7SeA2sLrM8
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡir31hSfSEQ
是Matt教青青：愛情世界是殘酷的。曾經她想像過的一生一世，其實只是童話般的幻想……639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcUvNjTLlhQ
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUOZKzle0HE
而他們，已過了讀童話的心境了，因只想窺探幸福快樂之後的日子。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyYUOrZtDEP
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡI5auDGBxwP
阿樂只好拍拍青青的肩。639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7JwMsEF69C
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaJ2tQ1lIqs
此時，阿樂又冷不防地說了一句：639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6EEzSwD7u4
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCiPqFaC2xe
「佢嗰句『Love you forever』，可能係Made in China。」639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhshc7pzrxM
639Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsOtPDamO6X
青青被此話篤中笑點，覺得很抵死。
Penana
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