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YOONGI
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I left the gymnasium with a massive headache and a need for food and sleep. Although, I didn't know which one I needed more. The last couple of days were tough where cramming was concerned. On top of that it was hard to sleep with Yurim's teary doe eyes from that night haunting me. I didn't mean to make her cry. I just wanted her to know that I'm on her side. Or at least I was. After her cold greeting today I doubt she cared if I was on her side or not. She hated me. That much was clear. Frankly, her reasoning was off, but it won't do much complaining about it.
Heading toward the back fence of the school where I usually entered and left through, my stomach growled. All I ate today was a little packaged cake this morning. The exam's mind numbing effects already took hold, but now hunger was making it worse. I needed food and fast.238Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvDY6bWSspz
I looked back toward the front of the campus and sighed. I'm sure she left by now. It should be fine for today if I went out the front gate. The nearest restaurant was only a block from there. I made a 180 degree turn toward the front of the school.
Out of pure habit, I looked toward the bus stop across the street. Surprisingly, her bus hadn't come yet. My chest felt heavy at the sight of her there by herself. Yurim stared down at her phone, her long hair curtaining the sides of her face. She wiped her cheek and sighed. The action tugged on my heart strings. Why the hell was she so damn sad? I hated when she did this, kept her pain to herself. Especially when she won't even look at me.
Once I crossed the road, I considered approaching her but I doubted she'd want to talk to me. It turns out that it didn't matter anyway, because a car pulled up in front of her. At first I was wary and waiting, making sure she wasn't about to get kidnapped or something. After what had happened over the weekend, it was totally possible.
It was Jin.
Typically, seeing him brought a strong feeling of annoyance. The lady who worked for Hoseok's uncle was there too. Jin and Yurim exchanged sickening smiles while standing hand in hand. What was more sickening was how I voluntarily dug my own grave by watching it all. Which reminded me, why did I stay at the carnival? Why couldn't I just face the fact that she liked Jin and let it be? But no, I had to keep following her around hoping she'd throw me a bone.
No more. It was time to face the truth. And that is: that it's over. The hoping, the bickering, all of it. She was done with me.
I turned my back on the happy couple and carried on my way. Time to move on.
Suddenly, the long beep of the bus' horn pierced the air. It zoomed past me. I watched it heading for the black car that carried Jin. A tiny part of me wanted the bus driver to tap the back of the car to at least take its bumper off. But the wish fell out of existence when I met Yurim's eyes all of a sudden.
Heat spread through my chest.
I don't know why I wouldn't move. She ignored me this morning and for the past few days. Surely I had every right to turn my back on her right now. But I was too curious. What would she do next after seeing me? What was going through her head?
Then Jin kissed her. And she kissed him back.
A nearly audible shatter rung from my chest. I scoffed at myself with a faux smirk. I can't believe I actually did it again. Even now, after everything that has happened, I dared to hope. Yoongi, you idiot. I adjusted my backpack as it felt three times heavier now and continued on my way.
Maybe with him she won't be sad anymore at least...
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For the next couple of days I thought I'd treat myself to some time away from school. It's not like I had much of a social life there anyway. Somehow the air there felt heavy these days. Not even quiet lunch periods on the roof felt the same. I roughly popped a can of soda open as my mind began to pivot toward a certain someone. Someone I was training myself to forget.
She was probably making after-graduation plans with them right now. I wondered what her plans for school and her career was.
"Your order," a waitress placed a bowl of tteokbokki and a serving of steaming dumplings in front of me. The smell made my mouth water.
Just in time, I thought. I caught myself thinking about her then proceeded to keep thinking about her. I could kick myself for being so weak minded. Looks like the food came at the right time. Surely that was a sign, that I was supposed to forget her.
"Thanks."
I slurped a piece of saturated rice cake and popped a fish cake in my mouth. The savory goodness made me sigh with satisfaction. Good food was the best comfort and sanctuary. Next to soju, of course. I looked at the customers around me. None of them seemed to think it was strange that I was here during school hours. Had my street clothes really convinced them that I was older? Getting away with things was too easy.
I chugged down a few gulps of soda when someone sat across from me. The carbonated drink nearly went down the wrong pipe. My heart palpitated seeing long black hair and a small feminine build. However, I got a good look at the girl across from me and immediately lost interest, returning to my dumplings.
"Aren't you supposed to be in school?" I muttered with a full mouth.
"Aren't you?" She replied, unamused.
Her tone came as a surprise, as did her rigid posture and sullen expression. The middle school girl didn't carry her usual annoying, boy crazy tune. Out the window, her friends seemed to be nervously waiting outside for her. Their eyes alternating between us. I didn't know what was up. All I knew was that I was trying to enjoy my meal and making a spectacle of our presence was going to raise questions. Especially since they were all in their school uniforms. Did they even respect the art rebelliousness?
"Minju, right?" I guessed. The girl let out a strange sounding cough before nodding her head, her cheeks slightly more pink than a second ago. "Whatever it is you're doing here, you should tell your friends to take a walk. I don't need people here thinking I'm not supposed to be here."
"But you're not."
"They don't need to know that."
Minju made a look to her friends who looked reluctant to leave. But within a few seconds they were gone from view.
"I need to talk you," she proceeded as I continued to graze. "It's about my sister."
I stopped chewing as though suddenly tasting something rancid, "why? I have nothing to do with her."
Minju blinked, startled at my cold response but she rolled her shoulders back, finding her confidence. "With the way you two argued that night it doesn't seem like that's true."
I didn't bother meeting her gaze. So she heard us.
"I wanna know what's wrong with her, why she's been acting strange since exam day."
My mind went straight to my memories of that day. The worst part. The image of the couple's joined lips was seared into my brain. Officially ruining my meal. Why did it occur to this girl to ask me when there were clearly others who Yurim was close to? I wanted to wave her off and tell her I was the wrong person to ask, but found my words to be much different. "Strange, how?"
"She isn't talking to any of us. Her head is always somewhere else. And she keeps reading this weird letter a hundred times a day - which she's very protective of, by the way. She left a bruise on my shoulder when I tried to take it. And she never hits me, not like that." The girl sat reminiscing while rubbing her shoulder.
"Your sister has her first boyfriend. With that in mind it seems like typical teen behavior to me," I said flatly before serving myself more mandu. "The way I hear it, a girl will chop your arm off if you take away her first love letter."
"But... it wasn't even a love letter. Maybe a part of it, but it was mostly a goodbye letter. I even took a picture of it, see?" She tapped and swiped at her phone before turning the screen to me.
At first, something in me felt wrong for looking at something that was most definitely meant to be private. There was a sick feeling that I had just intruded on someone's personal life, but at the same time, I couldn't deny that I was curious about her. What she's been doing, what her thoughts consisted of these days. Not only that, but there was the suspicion that this letter of both love and farewell could be from Jin. Did he reel her in just to break her heart? I already began fuming. The first thing I noticed was the letter's clumsy start without even a proper opening. It said:
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I can't do phones right now, so I'm writing a "heartfelt" letter. I've never written a letter before today, but I'm guessing it's easier than writing ten page essays for history. Not like you weren't there to help me write them when I was having a hard time... Speaking of phones, do you know what nickname I gave you in my contacts (back when I had a phone)?
Horim's Mom!
How's our little pup doing anyway? I hope you're taking good care of him. He's there to protect you and keep you company when I'm away, you know. Which might be a while...
Sorry, my friend. I entered your life hoping to be someone you could lean on and make you smile. But it seems like in these past couple of months I've made you cry more instead. There was a lot that wasn't supposed to happen this year. A lot that ruined certain plans I had. It was going to be the year that I finally told you everything. Everything which you know now... except for maybe one thing.
I wasn't counting on being asked to help with the job. I didn't expect my past to come back and haunt me. I didn't expect to selfishly match-make you and you-know-who just so I could do what was expected of me and keep you close at the same time. I definitely didn't think I'd be asking a bully for help in looking out for you or his hilarious willingness to do so.
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My breath got caught as I realized that he was talking about me. The utter embarrassment that Yurim had read this multiple times set my face ablaze. This was definitely the work of Hoseok! That idiot couldn't just leave me out of it?
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As a consequence I made quite a mess of all of us. And now I've made a liar out of myself again, haven't I? I told you we'd get to see each other, but that hasn't happened. I'd tell you that I hope you'll forgive me one day but, to be honest, you spoil me too much with forgiveness. I can practically get away with anything with you! ^_^
When you get married one day, make sure you never let him off so easily okay? Don't be afraid to tell him off when he's done something wrong. Also, don't marry anyone who makes life too easy for you. Life should be an adventure. You-know-who isn't a bad guy. In fact, he's perfect. Too perfect. And he'll spoil the tough girl out of you, which is one of your many charming attributes. But you don't have to listen to me. What do I know about love and relationships, right? The guy who set up his crush with her crush is giving you random marriage advice. That's hilarious!
This won't be my last letter but it might take a while for the next. And sorry, but it's gonna have to stay one sided. Otherwise what would be the point of staying low? I don't know how long this will be and I don't want to guess and get your hopes up around that day. So... let's just be penpals for a bit! Well, penpals where only one pal sends messages and the other reads them. After putting it that way it sounds like you've got the short end of the stick. I wouldn't want to be stuck reading my awkward letters. Sorry about that.
Anyway, I hope school's going well. Three months left! I hope I'll be able to get another letter out to you before the end. I should get you a gift somehow...
I'll work on it.
This is where I should end the letter, but I'm worried it'll make you sad. And I miss you. Writing to you gives the closest feeling of talking with you. Sometimes I can even imagine your face as I'm writing. I could tell what you'd scrunch your nose at, smile at, or that wrinkly thing your chin does when you feel shy and embarrassed. I'm gonna miss that feeling of having had a complete day when I'd see you.
Horim's mom, don't be sad okay? Tell our pup he'll see his super cool and good looking dad one day. Be happy and look forward to my next letter.
I love you. In every way.
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I stared blankly at the image on Minju's phone for a while. Stirring in my head were mixed feelings, mostly of cringe and embarrassment for reading such a thing. However, I also couldn't help noticing how vague he was being throughout the letter. Except for when it came to Horim, whatever that was. It must've been something only they knew and shared. He didn't even address Yurim or sign his name at the end.
Hoseok was definitely a cautious guy. It was no wonder, Minju had a hard time understanding and discerning who the letter was from. Although, the history essay part was kind of a dead giveaway. It's not like Yurim had a lot of friends to help with their homework.
"Now do you see?" Minju chimed in eagerly. "Yurim isn't distant because she's in love. She's distant because she's depressed about something. And I think this letter has something to do with it. The question is why? Who is this guy? What are we gonna do to change her back?"
"'We?'"
"Well... yeah. You two are friends right? I tried to get a hold of Hoseok-oppa but his number doesn't seem to be working. And I unfortunately didn't find enough about Jin to know how to even start looking for him. And I tried messaging Jimin-oppa on social media but he hadn't replied." She looked especially disappointed at that. "So... you're my only hope," the girl rested her chin on her hands as she leaned on the table with her elbows.
"I don't know..." I hesitated.
"I mean, she seemed pretty down that night you two fought so I wouldn't be surprised if you had a little to do with it too..." Minju's eyes made its rounds about the room before checking my expression.
I knew what she was trying to do. She was trying to guilt trip me into helping her out. And it was working. Whatever was wrong, I didn't want to be the reason she's sad or depressed. Yet, at the same time, I knew she didn't want me in her life anymore. I gave the middle schooler a reluctant look. "I don't know much about Jin, but I've been to Hoseok's house. We can try there first." The girl's shoulders did a little hop as she shifted around excitedly.
If he was laying low, Hoseok's sure not to be there. But maybe his uncle would be and maybe he could tell me a little more about what was going on.
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I hadn't intended to go to his house right after eating my meal, much less with the overly eager Minju but here we were, walking down the street towards the familiar wooden gate with a black metal trim. When we left the tteokbokki shop, I told her she needed to at least ditch her friends for the rest of the day. There was no way I was going to be traipsing the streets with an entourage of middle school girls. People tended to be wary of me without them already.
"You know when I said we could try this place, I actually meant I'd go alone and let you know what I'd find," I complained.
"And how would you have updated me? You don't have my number. Yet," she added under her breath. I raised a brow at her. She cleared her throat, "and I bet you wouldn't come riding up to my house on your motorcycle with the way you left things with my sister."
I sighed and ignored her clear attempt at getting me to talk about that night. Besides, it was obvious that she knew I had no intentions on reporting anything to her and leaving her out of this all together.
When we got to the gate, I pushed the button on the call box. A good five seconds had passed when there was a response.
"Don't you two have school?" Heejae's terse greeting rung out from the box.
"You got five minutes?" I asked, wasting no time with formalities.
The woman sighed into the microphone, "I guess. If you came all this way."
A buzz sounded and the gate opened. Minju and I made our way to the front door where we were met with the security guard. To my surprise she was in her pajamas with a purple hoodie to match. Her brown bob cut which was usually sleek and pin straight looked like it hadn't been brushed.
I chuckled, "ah, so the outside finally matches the inside."
Heejae rolled her eyes. "What's this? Is the grumpy boy finally amused?" She then looked at Minju and jumped, startling the young girl, "omo! I thought you were Yurim-ah."
Minju straightened and bowed, "I'm her younger sister, Lee Minju. Nice to meet you! Are you Hoseok's sister? He never said he had a sister. Then again, I don't listen to him that much."
"Huh..." the woman stared at her.
"They're like night and day, right?" I said.
"Right. Anyway I guess I should invite you in." Heejae led us in and once again I was shocked by what I saw. Clothes were left draped on the sofa and chairs, dishes were left unwashed in the sink, and the sunlight emitting through the backdoor made the many coffee ring stains on the dining table visible. Knowing what a clean freak he is, I wondered what Mr. Jung would say about this. "Not a word from you." Heejae pointed a finger at me.
"About the mess? I wasn't gonna say anything," I refrained from smiling while she glowered at me.
The woman turned to Minju, "should I get something to drink for you two?"
Minju who hadn't known how to respond to the person who hadn't replied to her introduction earlier looked to me. So, I answered, "no thanks. We wouldn't want you to go through the trouble of washing cups for us to use."
Heejae scoffed in unbelief, though there was a hint of amusement there. "I can't believe how similar you and Hoseok are. Watch yourself Min Yoongi," she raised her fist to me. "Now get to the point, why'd you two come here?"
"We wanted to talk to Hoseok." Minju chimed in eagerly, finding her courage again. "I've been trying to reach him but with no luck."
"And you thought you'd find him at home during school hours?" Heejae raised a brow.
"Well... I admit I hadn't planned on skipping school to go looking for him. But after running into Yoongi-oppa and him saying he knew where Hoseok lived, I thought, why not? School will be out in a few minutes so it'd be perfect if we could wait for him. He and my sister are friends and she's been acting a bit weird lately, so I- I mean we were hoping to talk to him and see if he knows why."
"Ah, is that so?" Heejae responded carefully before giving me look of warning. Everything Minju said was an indication that she had no idea what was going on and what had occurred over the last couple of weeks. And it was important that it stayed that way. I knew that if I wanted answers, I'd have to get rid of her. "And you thought of this idea too?" the security guard asked me directly. Of course, what she was really asking is what I had planned to do about the younger girl.
"That's right. We really worried about Yurim..." my mind glitched in thought just for a second. I hadn't said her name out loud since the last time we talked. "And Hoseok's her closest friend so it makes sense. We promise not to be a nuisance. In fact, I thought it might be a good opportunity for Minju to see the garden outside while we wait. She loves taking pictures. Right?" I nudged the girl next to me who blushed.
"You remembered," she giggled and pushed her hair behind her ear.
"I see," Heejae acknowledged. "Alright, you can stay and wait." Minju jumped at the great news.
Not wanting to stick around longer than was needed, I quickly took her out into the backyard. I knew she wouldn't be able to refuse. She was one of those social media girls who looked for opportunities to post pretty things.
As I predicted, she practically leaped off the deck onto the stone path between the flowered hedges. It was a very beautiful garden and the perfect place to think. I shared it with Yurim that night, not only as a peace offering but because I genuinely thought she'd appreciate it just as much as me. It was just as pretty in the day as it was at night. But something about that night in particular made it feel like another world. A world where magic existed.
Seeing Minju wandering the garden with her long black hair made it hard not to picture Yurim there. Only she wouldn't waste time posing and taking selfies. She'd watch the flowers bathing in the sun, the dragon flies dancing over the water... she'd just be.
"Do you wanna hop in?" she asked, holding up her phone.
I blinked at her then shook my head, "I'm gonna use the bathroom. You keep... snapping, I guess."
"'Kay!"
I returned in the house, closing the glass door behind me. Sun spots littered my vision which took a couple of minutes to disappear. When they did, Heejae walked out from Mr. Jung's office. She looked at me then noticed Minju through the doors. "Oh, that didn't take long. So, what's the real reason you came?"
"Well, to be honest, I really do want to know why Yurim's been depressed. Hoseok is in hiding but he has his uncle who seems smart and more than capable of keeping him under wraps. And it's not like the mob is gonna waste time and resources looking for him forever. They'd die out eventually right? He'll come back and in the meantime she has her boyfriend to comfort her and keep her company," I tried to say without bitterness.
"Don't be so quick to underestimate a mob's motivation for revenge. Even gangsters have their own codes and politics. A leader needs to keep the respect of their underlings and if he shows even the slightest weakness to a traitor of the organization, who knows what chaos will ensue? What Hoseok was risky. Very risky."
She went on to explain how Hoseok was found by the boss and offered a chance to 'come back' peacefully. Hoseok accepted the offer, not seeing much of a choice. That explains the week of school he missed right before the fair. However, with the time he bought by joining back, he thought up an idea and made the risk to tell his uncle and Heejae that something was going to happen at the fair and to keep a close watch on him but to also keep their distance.
There was no back and forth communication - only what he told them. Less communication was safer for both of them since he didn't feel completely trusted by his peers. Mr. Jung and Heejae stressed for two days over the tiny bit of cryptic info. There was no indication of what would occur or how they should prepare. Hoseok merely trusted that they'd take the actions necessary to counter the mob.
"Nonetheless, we had our people surveilling the fair undercover. And others, like myself, waiting in cars should the need for a chase came. We finally spotted Hoseok but he was alone until he met up with you. If their people were there they were well hidden. We didn't know what to expect until we saw Jin arrive. That kid, an escape artist. Who'd have thought? That's when we knew they were planning on taking him. So, we slipped a tracker into Hoseok's pocket unnoticed, even to him.
"When the tracker began moving away from the area of the fair, that's when me mobilized. Then of course, that's when we met you and Yurim at that stop light. And you know the rest of the story from there." She went to the coffee maker to pour herself a cup, "anyway, when Jei saw me, he recognized me from the night we saved Hoseok in the alleyway. That's when he knew that Hoseok was the reason their whole operation went south. That he betrayed them."
She sighed as she stirred cream and sugar into her mug.
"Hoseok thinks going into hiding was his fault, thinking if he killed him that night the boss wouldn't have found out. I guess, that's true. But he also could've been able to live freely if I just stayed away from the scene in the first place. If Jei never saw me, he wouldn't have connected the dots." Heejae took a sip, her eyes full of regret.
"If you stayed away, we wouldn't have made it out." I recalled the events of that night. "We would've been either killed or taken. And to Yurim, maybe even worse could've happened. Besides, he's practically like your little brother, it'd be unnatural not to step in and kick those guys' asses," I attempted to lighten the mood.
Heejae managed a small smile before it just as quickly dropped. "Poor girl. I bet she didn't intend on losing her friends in her final year of high school."
"Wait. What do you mean?"
Heejae looked at me as though I should've known what she was talking about. "First Hoseok leaves without a proper goodbye or explanation for who knows how long. Then there's Jin and his family's move to Europe on short notice," she explained.
So Jin left too? What was with their lovey dovey meeting the other day? Was my original suspicions right about him reeling her in then dropping her? My blood started to boil.
"And you... well, if you came here to find out what's up with her, you two must not be on good terms."
"Like she cares. I doubt she even sees me as one of her friends."
Heejae raised her brows skeptically then chuckled to herself. "In a way I agree with you," she sipped her coffee with a secretive grin. "Curious how a girl gets kissed by a guy at a fair then asks a different guy to hang around, isn't it?"
Butterflies did flips in my stomach, the warmth in my cheeks intensified. I didn't respond immediately for fear I'd give away my true feelings. I scoffed resentfully, "then blames everything on said guy and refuses to have anything to do with him."
"Yet, you're here. If only she knew-"
"If only she could catch a hint," I quipped then froze. Realizing my mistake, I looked at her to see if she caught the accidental confession. Her forced look of nonchalance determined that she had. I ducked my head, embarrassed.
"Look," she giggled, "all I know is, you have a choice here. You can stay by her side or you can disappear like the others. One of the exciting things about moving on to the next step of one's life after high school is doing it with friends. Right now she doesn't have that."
I sighed as we stood in silence for a bit.
I had no intention of speaking to Yurim again, but that was when I thought she'd reached her happily ever after with Jin. And before hearing what Hoseok had done in his failed attempt to escape the mob clean. Those guys must be pissed and now that the boss knew what he did, they were probably more ruthless in their search for him than ever. And if they knew he and Heejae were connected, it's just one more piece of information that can give them more of an advantage. Making them a bigger problem than I initially thought.
"I thought you just wanted to use the bathroom," Minju grumbled as she let herself back in. "Since you didn't come back I thought Hoseok must've shown up. Did he?" She gave each of us a hopeful look.
"No, but we should be leaving."
"What? No! I thought we were gonna wait until he shows up!"
"We waited for as long as we could. You need to get home before she worries about you too." I turned to Heejae and nodded, "thanks for letting us in."
She gave a two finger salute, "anytime."
I hurried the pouting Minju out the front door before she decided to throw a tantrum. After letting her stomp toward the gate, I leaned back in through the door. "Noona."
"Hm?"
"In the alley that night, did Jei see you and Mr. Jung?"
"That's right," she nodded solemnly.
"Couldn't that lead them here?" I asked, worried. From the looks of it, she was staying here alone. Probably in hiding from where she really lived. But if they did their research on Mr. Jung and found out his and Hoseok's relationship, they could likely find his address too.
"Eventually. But don't worry, I don't plan on staying long. Mr. Jung asked me to pack up and sort out some confidential documents from his office. In case anyone does come, it's important that company/client information isn't compromised. Go on, I'll be fine," she waved me off, her coffee in hand. It was then that I noticed the circles under her eyes. I could bet she was restlessly keeping a look out for mobsters. They could be show up at any time. It made me wonder about me and Yurim. We were there too. Were we safe?
I nodded thoughtfully and closed the door behind me.
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After enduring what felt like a long bus ride full of gossip and unwanted anecdotes, we were finally back on our feet toward the Lee's home. I tried to ditch Minju at the bus stop but she threatened that she wouldn't go home if I hadn't walked her. One needed to be careful around her. Her manipulation had potential to be on Namjoon's level.
I even caught her trying to take a picture of us walking together. She was so relentless that I had to make a deal with her to stop if I held her backpack for her. Of course that alone wasn't enough for her. She threw my number into the deal as well. Which was fine. I could just block her later when I had the chance.
Much to my relief we reached her house at last. I shrugged off the backpack from my shoulder and gave it back to her. She took it with reluctance. "Thanks," she said, "even if it wasn't a successful day."
"I wouldn't say that. You successfully skipped school without being scolded. Which reminds me, if you wanna skip school, don't look like you are."
"Right. I see you're the expert," she looked at my casual appearance. A long sleeved shirt and jeans. "No wonder no one scolded me. They probably thought you were my boyfriend or something," she hopped on her toes with a big grin.
"More like your brother."
"No way!" she said disappointed.
"Minju-ya!"
Both of our heads whipped toward Yurim who raced down the stairs and over to us. Her eyes busily flickered between us, riddled with both confusion and vexation. I turned to her and straightened my posture. It looked like she had just gotten out of the shower, her hair still partially wet and flipped to one side. The over sized t-shirt she wore was stained with water where her hair touched it. Below, she sported a pair of jean shorts, her bared feet on the concrete. Evidently, she was in a rush to get out here.
"Why are you home later than usual? I saw Hyeji today and she acted weird when I asked about you. Where've you been? Did you skip school again?" Yurim interrogated her sister without so much as a look towards me or even a question as to why I was there. Only when Minju couldn't figure out how to answer her did she look at me. "Did you put her up to this?"
I opened my mouth to defend myself but Minju spoke first.
"He didn't! We just ran into each other. In fact, he kept me out of trouble and took me home so you wouldn't worry!"
Yurim stared at the younger girl with disappointment. There looked to be a lot she wished to say but decided against it. "Go in the house, we'll talk about it later."
Minju rolled her eyes and made for the stairs, "don't fight."
Yurim watched her until she disappeared behind the door, but I could only stare at her, unsure of what to say and how to approach her about all that Heejae had told me. When she turned back towards me, her eyes barely met mine. "Thanks for bringing her back safely," she said begrudgingly.
"Sure," I replied hoarsely. Again, Yurim made an attempt to leave without another word. "Yurim-ah..." she stopped and turned around stiffly. "I wanted to talk to you."
"About what?"
I shrugged, "about Jin and Hoseok? I didn't know how bad it was. I didn't even know that Jin left."
"Jin leaving is bad? Shouldn't you be happy? The people you hate are gone now. Why do you care?"
"Because your hurting and..." I scratched the back of my head nervously, "I don't know, I should make sure you're okay." I felt like a complete idiot, but I needed to try. Instead of feeling supported, the look on her face appeared to be even more conflicted. "I'm sorry that you're going through this," I trudge on awkwardly. Words of support wasn't exactly my forte.
"Don't do that."
"Don't do what?"
"Don't act like you're my friend," her expression looked pained.
"But I am you're friend," I said like an absolute idiot. At this point I felt I was begging her to accept me. But I needed to make one last effort to be there for her. I needed her accept that I'd help her. Otherwise, what was the point of being close to her if she didn't let me look out for her?
"Yoongi, I'm sorry... but you're not. I can't accept you as one or that you ever were one." She stepped back, triggering the cracks in whatever hope I had of returning to her side. If ever I had been before. "Please, don't talk to me or my family again, okay?" She turned her back.
"Yurim-ah. No, I mean, Yurim." I called hopelessly. Yurim stopped but didn't look back. "Those guys saw our faces too. Just please, be careful. And don't go out alone. Okay?" She didn't answer. She only disappeared up those stairs and into her house. No goodbyes or last looks. She was just gone.
And like that I stood in front of her house, broken and shattered for the second time this week.
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