Sometimes I think sit and think about the times when I was a child. I was forced out of my childhood at a very young age. People ask, “why is she so childish?” And they sometimes say that I should grow up. I just want someone to understand me, someone who knows how I feel. I’m childish, I don’t want to be.. but I am. I’m not a childish girl, I don’t know why I throw child-like tantrums. I’ve been mature since I was a kid, I’m sure you can tell from my sudden change of mood from last year. Things happened, and now I’m back to where I was before. I’m the mature little girl from before again. I always said I didn’t wanna be childish anymore, I wanted to be mature again. But, not in this way. Even in the eyes of other people I’m still childish, not matter how many traumas I go through that cause me to mature more. I can never be happy, I’m always robbed of the childhood I wish I lived. I’m not a child, I was way mature than the other children, I didn’t a stupid father’s affection. I just wanted my mom to look at me for once, I just wanted her to stay by me and acknowledge me. I’m not childish, I was just robbed of my childhood. I wanna experience being a child, I wanna be childish without being judge. Even though I hate being childish and I hate childish people. I just wanted to live a normal childhood. Where both my parents weren’t absent, where my mother was present mentally, and my father was present physically. It’s, not fair, I still am that worthless little girl.
ns 15.158.61.5da2