"Happy Birthday, Teddy!"
Rough hands slammed into my side to shove me. I groaned at the relentlesness of them and tried to shield myself with the soft doona so I could try and buffer Lavender's body.
I heard the door open just as Lavender started jumping on the bed around my cocoon. Lavender slammed into me once more to try and move me.
My body felt so tender. It only made me want to stay in bed even more.
"Come on! Bath time, you monster!" Dad called out with a laugh when Lavender finally abandoned me, her little feet pattering away outside the room.
I sighed and relaxed.
"You too, Teddy!" he called out.
I groaned and wriggled down to the foot of the bed to peer at him from under the covers. He was wearing an apron and had a bowl in his hands that he was mixing with a smile.
Mum was there too, giggling. Her face softened when I managed the strength to slide myself from the dark comfort and dawdle past her, groaning about the pain Lavender had left on my side.
"You'll have tough skin if she keeps rolling you like a little loaf of bread" Mum joked, kissing the top of my head between my horns.
They were just starting to curve at the top now. I kept my ears flat so that I didn't poke Mum in the eyes with them, but my curving tail gave away the pleasure I felt from her gentleness.
I had thought Lavender was just like a mother, but I had been wrong. With her acceptance, Mum was the person who made me feel the most safest and loved. Dad had accepted me too after our trip to Mr Solo, taking it slow so they didn't frighten me back to where it was dark and safe.
But now that I was part of this family, I found myself barely darting back for Lavender. It was nice to be so unconditionally loved.
Mum returned to the kitchen with Dad while I slipped into the bathroom. Lavender was already naked and in the bath, playing with the rubber ducks bobbing amongst the bubbles.
Her eyes watched me curiously when I stripped off and slid in at the opposite end. I kept my tail hanging over the edge so it wasn't at the mercy of Lavender's clumsy feet.
My eyes glanced at her while my hands absently played with the toys bobbing around us. Lavender was the same as me above the water; but below it, it was a confusing story.
It was yet another thing that was different between us. And such a curious thing too.
Lavender's eyes were trying to peek below the bubbles as well. The rubber ducks offered the perfect coverage for us both while we explored.
We giggled together. Lavender made bubbles rise up inside me to pop just like the ones surrounding us.
Mum came in to help wash us both. Lavender was the first out of the bath and into the waiting towel that helped rub her over. Once she was dry, she pulled on her newest item of clothing; a cream dress adorned with patterns of strawberries. Little bees flitted across the fabric that had spots of colour around the borders of each picture.
It was such a pretty dress that Lavender was excited to twirl in to show me as Mum tried to brush and tie her hair up.
When she was gone, Mum helped me out and smothered me in the warm towel that roughed the water from my body. I peeked out at her from the top, to have her lightly touch my nose with her finger.
Another matching dress was waiting for me. I had specifically asked for one when Lavender had found hers on one of our family shopping trips. It was exciting to have something that would match her and felt so freeing.
"You are getting so big already!" Mum marvelled when she rolled my tail in the towel "soon, you'll have to take baths all by yourself."
"How come?" I faced her with a frown.
It was getting cramped but I'm sure we could make it work somehow. Bathing alone just didn't seem as fun.
Mum left the towel to help me into the dress.
"Well, girl and boy privates are different" she spoke "and growing boys need their own private time, as do growing girls. You'll start feeling things that will be different from what Lavender feels."
"Like when it's touched?" I piped up and she nodded.
I looked up into the mirror as Mum leant over to grab the hairbrush and run it through my tussled hair.
"There is such a thing as a 'good touch' and a 'bad touch' " she explained "a good touch is you touching your privates and doing something you want to with them that makes you feel happy. A bad touch is someone like a stranger touching your privates that you don't want them too. If it ever makes you feel sad or scared, it's a bad touch. I want you to tell me or Daddy if that ever happens, OK?"
I saw Mum's stern face and quickly nodded.
"We are going to be going on a special birthday trip today" she spoke and put down the brush so she could turn me to face her "and there will be lots of other strangers there too. I want you to stay close to us and remember your touches."
Good touch. Bad touch. That was easy to remember.
Pancakes with chocolate smiles were devoured around the kitchen table before everyone packed into the car to begin the trip to the location Mum and Dad were keeping secret.
It only made us more excited to find out what it was. We eagerly scanned the passing trees for any signs of what it might be when we ventured further from the clusters of towns.
Eventually, a large white building loomed into view. It was surrounded by rolling fields of lush green grass that looked too vibrant to be real. A wooden cottage sat closest to the gravel road we bumped along, it's own spread of covered tables speckled before it.
"We are going to pick lots and lots of strawberries today!" Mum announced excitedly from the drivers seat "tonnes and tonnes of yummy fruit! And you can eat as much as you want!"
How could something like that be true? As much food as I wanted?!
We were ready to sprint for the cottage before Mum and Dad were ready. We tugged on their hands to try and move them quicker, but they were determined on being as slow as possible.
Once we were given entry and had paper bands wrapped around our wrists, we were a guided to the white building by another adult. This one ran through its announcements I didn't pay attention to and let us file inside in a straight line.
When we passed them and entered, I was amazed at by what I saw around me.
Rows and rows of endless waves of red and green were dangling from the white supports secured into the dirt. Each support was brimming with ripe, red strawberries dangling downwards from the weight of each fruit.
There were so many that it didn't even seem like our already massive group was going to even scratch the surface of trying to pick them all.
"We have to stick together" Dad warned when I went to venture ahead to the nearest row "it's a big place to get lost in."
I returned to their sides immediately and let them guide us towards the biggest strawberries for our shared basket.
Mum and Dad clipped the fruits like experts with the tools they had been given. Each one that fell into the basket was gobbled up by Lavender or I. It was a race of who could devour the most, before our stomachs simply wouldn't let us anymore and we helped with the clipping under careful guidance.
When we eventually left the warmth of the building and returned to the cottage to pay for the hefty weight of strawberries, the sky was thick with grey clouds and growing winds.
We sat around the table out the front of the cottage to enjoy the scenery and try to squeeze in more variations of the fruit offered for sale inside. The almost bitter chocolate dip shared with Lavender was smearing more around our mouths than it was being eaten.
It was a sticky mess that made everyone laugh. Lavender even swiped some more on my face that sent more bubbles popping in my stomach before I attacked her sticky cheek with a laugh.
It was such a strange feeling. It made the windy air suddenly seem hot, and the bubbles twist my stomach into knots.
I didn't feel this way with Mum or Dad, only Lavender. And only when she was being playful or cheeky with me.
It was still bubbling inside me when we had to run for the cover of the car as the skies poured down on us. Lavender stomped about in the rain, which led to her being absolutely soaked by the time we were safely in the car. The excitement of it all eventually drained her energy and dragged her into sleep, her head resting against me while I drew on the fogged window the rain hammered against.
"Dad" I called out "what makes it rain?"
Our eyes met when he turned around from the passengers seat to acknowledge me. Mum kept driving onwards, the wipers working furiously to try and clear her a path to see out of.
"When it gets really hot, little drops of water evaporate into the sky" he said and twinkled his fingers towards the roof of the car "but it's so small you can't see it. And when it gets up in the sky, some of it turns into clouds and some of it gets bigger and bigger until it gets so heavy that it falls down as rain."
"And do you know what makes the clouds grey?" Mum chimed in.
"What?"
"When the water goes up into the sky, the spirits up there jump around in happiness to make them nice and fluffy. But when they do, all their feet turns the white clouds grey and makes the rain come out."
Spirits in the sky.
I stared up at it in awe. The clouds in the distance were almost black and had branches of lightning streaking across the sky. The wind whipped everything outside our car that shook against its torment.
I couldn't see any of their lights like I could at night. Not a single one was shining through the angry storm that Mum submitted to as she pulled the car over.
"Tonight, we will get to see them all again" Mum smiled at me and gently brushed her hand over Lavender's face "if the fireworks happen. We can't send them up for the spirits to enjoy if it's too wet."
"But we can still let them know we are thinking of them with the sparklers at home" Dad offered helpfully to Mum who kissed his cheek with a giggle.
"For now, let's let them finish jumping around up there and enjoy the sound of the rain."
I nodded and rested my head against the cold glass to dream of playful spirits dancing for the upcoming celebrations.
The storm was subsiding by the time we were gathered around the kitchen table again after a warm dinner for the cake being carried by Dad.
All the lights had been turned out to make the blazing candles and their own soul lights beam brightly before me. They all sang out to tune together and presented me with the cake made from the strawberries we had all picked together. A waxy blue number seven was resting in the middle of the halo of candles that steadily dripped downwards.
"Make a wish!" Lavender cried out at the end of the song.
A wish? What did I want?
"Hurry!" Mum chuckled "otherwise the cake will be wax."
I looked around at the smiling faces and knew what my wish would be. I blew out the candles to a chorus of cheers and felt the happiness welling up in my eyes.
"Teddy's crying again!"
The lights were turned on and I quickly tried to wipe away my tears.
"They're happy ones" I insisted to them all.
Mum and Dad weren't concerned. I had cried over the candles at every birthday they had thrown for me since that visit to the doctors.
It was just such a wonderful sight to see people who truly cared and loved me wanting to celebrate my life amongst them.
My wish was to have every day be one of care and appreciation with the ones I loved most.
Sweet cake was eaten from the safety of the front verandah overlooking the flower field. Everyone was wrapped in blankets to buffer to coldness that lingered with the retreated rain.
Fireworks screamed into the sky to shower it in colour. Each explosion shook through me as I watched it in wonder.
The stars sparkled amongst the colourful display scattering through them. Clouds of red and orange lingered each time a new firework was launched.
Sparks showered down once more from the sky. I saw one stream of light continue to fall when all the others had died out.
It fell into the field and illuminated the flowers around it. As the skies exploded, the little light was smothered in a ball of smoke that birthed two twinkling eyes from the void.
The cake fell from my lap when I rushed for the edge of the verandah to peer at it. But before I could call out, the darkness was darting through the field like oil on water.
More sparks drizzled from the explosions to fall to the earth. Some were in the distance while others snaked through the trees surrounding our property. Spirits from the sky were being born as demons from the land.
It was an amazing thing to witness what I had once been beneath the shattering sky.
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