Yes. I remember right. After graduation, I did kiss her on the cheek for no reason. And then I ran away because I was this gigantic pussy. I don't know why I ran. I knew I didn't want to see her reaction but I never knew why I ran. I didn't feel down at all then, but I doubt what I just did then was a good action. Ugghh, I don't know what to think of it.
So, pretty much, I was going to go to college in Colorado. I had planned everything out and I was going to leave the week after graduation so that way I could prepare. Plus, I had saved up a lot for the trip there but I hoped that I would, hopefully, be able to get a job there.
I wanted to spend at least a day full of fun because I always hated moving. I always didn't like distant communication. But because I wanted to hang out with my bro, David. Yeah, it was David. I called him up and asked him to come over and meet me at a Subway. Yes, I could've eaten somewhere else, but I didn't want to use much money. Yeah, I rarely went out so I could save up.... Did I already say that? I'm getting confused a little here, so I'm just gonna continue.
So... I already said stuff about my college... Yeah, I met him at a Subway in Phoenix. I'm sorry, I'm getting a little overwhelmed here. I am trying my best, really... We didn't hang out that much initially, but as high school went on, we hung out at his house more and more often. We played video games almost all the time, but this one time when the power went out, we played board games and listened to music until the power came back on. I didn't want him back at my house, but I let him go eventually. Why? .......I don't know, probably because I didn't have as much shit as he did.
I'm deviating so much from the story... Alright, I'm starting here. I met up with him at the Subway on Monroe Street and Central Avenue and we ordered our sandwiches, chips and sodas. If it matters at all, I got a Coke. Back then, we got the five dollar footlong deal before it phased out of Subways, so yeah that was cool. I needed something to distract myself for the upcoming move because I was gonna work then, so Subway was cool. We talked about what careers we were gonna pursue and what colleges we were going to. That's when I told him about the college I was going to and how I was moving to Colorado. He seemed concerned and he also asked if he could help move. I told him that it was fine, I didn't need help but I did extend my gratitude towards him.
After that, we drove over to a Sonic, I believe, to get milkshakes. Mine was strawberry with a cherry on top and his was a regular vanilla. And then we went to his house to help him with packing up and I helped him with everything I could. It took about an hour or so, then it took some more to unload everything. But I thought about spending the night at his house when I once again thought of his wish to help with the move, while I was thinking about that. I asked him about it, he said yes.
On our way to my house for me to pack up, I just blasted M83 on the radio. I believe he recognized some of the songs there, but I'm not so sure though. But nothing interesting went on at my house. The only thing that was interesting was me folding up clothes, toothpaste and toothbrush, towel, shampoo, conditioner and pajamas.
Oh, I think I forgot how to explain our friendship for this next part. We weren't just friends, to me we were closer than that. I still think that we are something like brothers in that way, even though work's getting in most of the way and he's changed a bit. I also forgot to mention the times that he attacked me. He attacked me two times, now three. He got angry for no reason when we were freshmen and he yelled at me before slapping me. The other time was when he pushed me away. And the third time was when he punched me straight in the chest.
It hurt.
At his house, his foster parents were polite and kind. The father, Thomas, was about as tall as me. I think he wore either Wranglers or Levi's, maybe even Lees. His sister was just wearing shorts and a shirt as well. I could already tell that she wanted to be left alone because she was on her phone. It was pretty simple. When we ate dinner, unlike everybody else at the table, I was detached and a bit overwhelmed. Plus, sometimes, I forgot what I was talking about out of hesitation and I didn't listen sometimes. So I felt embarrassed those times.
After dinner, me, Kaylon and his father, I think his name was Thomas, played a quick game of Monopoly that I know we're never gonna pick up again. Then, we went into his room and watched movies... Or maybe it was something else.... I can't even think...
I'm just gonna go with movies, fuck it. And after watching something for a while, I instantly got bored. And I started looking at the ceiling, playing around with my hair. My hair was quite shorter then.. Then I remembered. I don't know how I remember this, because I don't know when/how it happened, but I remembered that he is somewhat ticklish. So I tickled and played around with him, which seemed to annoy him. He told me to stop but I kept on going, until he pushed me off the bed and I grabbed him along.
He was pinning me down for absolutely no reason. He was on the top and I was on the bottom. The back of my head hurt so much. We were frozen. I wrapped my fingers around his. I could see the individual strands of brown color in his eyes. I got closer and closer to him until I kissed him. Warm. You should've seen the look on his face, but he didn't do anything to stop me. He appeared to enjoy it, though I was, more or less, an inexperienced kisser. I am an awkward person. I basically made our first kiss. Like I said, he didn't do anything to stop me. More or less, he kissed me back the same way and he looked adorable.
I should explain. Some of you may already know, but some of you may have no idea at all. I'm bisexual. Yeah, how is that possible? Well, it's possible.... I'm actually unsure of it still. Autistic and bisexual, that's a first....
Basically, it wasn't the first time I was actually falling for him in some way. I know, weird. This feeling actually happened around a year ago, maybe before that. But that's as far as I know. And I didn't want him romantically, but I did want him romantically. Ok, maybe a little bit sexually, since I was kinda getting a boner from looking at him. but I knew that this wasn't going to work. The idea of a relationship with him? It was possible, but I only knew so much about him. I could somewhat tell that he was also interested in me, but that was once. This was, more or less, not going to work.
So that was the first and only time I really was intimate in him. My feelings in him have slightly died out. But I never knew that he had a thing for redheads.
I only hope that everything goes well with Luca. Somehow they fit together. I ship them. Yep, they fit. I think...
I don't remember well what happened after that. Maybe we crashed, but it was unlikely. We weren't really feeling tired. The one thing I do remember is that we woke up the next day with almost no memory of what happened the other night. And he helped with me moving. We hugged that day, which made me remember the other night. I think he still remembers as well.
*laughs* Can I go home now?
ns 15.158.61.7da2
