It's probably not surprising that I don't have any friends at school. Senior year has just started and the only friends I have are my Mom and my Dad on a good day. I wouldn't put Delilah in that category because I barely know her and I know she doesn't go to this school. I would've noticed for sure. There are many reasons I don't have friends at school, but the main one has to be Jesus. I didn't try to hide that I could see and hear Jesus freshman through junior year. And since nobody else can see or hear Jesus, I look crazy. They've given me a title besides Judas. Yes, at Hawking's High School, they don't call me Judas. They call me: "Jesus Freak". Creative I know. Although, I don't mind that nickname. In actuality, I don't like my real name.
If you know nothing about Jesus' story, Judas betrays Jesus and turns him in for some silver coins. The amount he got was enough for a few meals at most. I know Jesus loved Judas as much as anyone, but I don't like my name being tied to the most iconic betrayal in history. It makes making friends at church hard.
"Hi, what's your name?"
"Judas, you? Oh. You're walking away now, okay."
That might be a slight exaggeration, but I've gotten my fair share of looks from my name. You might be wondering, what kind of a mother would name their child after the man who's responsible for killing God? Well, my biological mother, I call her by her name, Jenny, was devout in her faith. She loved God intensely. So much in fact that if I ever sinned, or made a mistake that was seen as against God, or said the Lord's name in vain, she'd lock me in a room for a day without food or water. Sometimes longer. There was nothing in that room. It had one window and it was completely empty except for one thing: A bible.
"Judas, you will read the words of God until you've learned your lesson!"
I had nothing else to do in that room. So I read. From Genesis, all the way to Revelations. I don't remember how many times I've read the bible over, but I do know I was thrown in that room ever since Jenny taught me how to read. I was homeschooled by her. And boy, was it fun. I can still feel the sting of the ruler hitting me for using my left hand to write. I'm right-handed now, but not by choice.
"Hey, Jesus Freak!" A pair of hands clap in front of my face and I'm brought back to reality. I'm in my first class of the day and to my left is Daniel Martinez. Daniel is the star quarterback of the Hawks; our high school football team. Calling him handsome would be an understatement. All the girls wanted him and all the boys wanted to be him. Except for me, I like being me! He's wearing his grey sports jacket with big yellow letters and numbers.
"Yes, my friend?" I say back to him, locking on to his brown eyes.
"Did you see the new girl? She's gonna sit right in that empty seat to your right. I checked the seating chart."
"No. I can't say I've seen her."
"Well, she's hot. And I'm not exaggerating when I say people are calling her a goddess."
"Okay."
"Okay? That doesn't excite you at all? She's gonna sit right next to you. If I were you, I'd make a move. And quick. The boys are gonna be all over her once they get a glimpse of that scrumptious a—"
"I've already met a girl. At Chick-fil-a."
"Really now? What does she look like?"
"She's... well, the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. And a nerd too."
"Huh. Why do I get the feeling you just made that up?"
"I don't lie."
"'Cause, it's a sin, right?"
"That and I'm just not good at it."
"Well, if you're not gonna make a move on her, I will."
"Go for it. See if I care."
He chuckles and shakes his head, "You're really somethin' else, Judas."
"Wait. Did you just call me by my name?"
Tiffany Belcher leans out of the classroom into the hallway when she calls out, "Here she comes!"
"Be ready to be amazed," Daniel says folding his hands behind his head.
"Trust me," I start "There's no woman in this world that's as beautiful as the one I got a date with yesterday."
Tiffany darts back to her seat and her friends start asking her questions. It seems like this new girl is causing quite the commotion at Hawking's High. Can she really be that beautiful? No. Impossible! There's no way she's as beautiful as Delilah.
But then the new girl takes a step into the threshold. And—I—I can't believe what I'm seeing. She keeps her head high and her back straight; a stance of pure confidence. Her eyes are ocean green and she has a nose ring piercing on her left nostril. Her outfit is simple yet stunning; a sun dress with thorny vines and navy blue roses that match her hair. Her skin is perfect; silky and smooth. And when I see the shine of her golden cross necklace dangling from her neck, I know it's Delilah.
So she's not in her twenties like I thought. She's a student like me and she's in my class. She's in my class!
Everyone is staring at her in awe like I am. Whispers and murmurs start to fly, all in disbelief of her radiance. She looks around then her eyes meet Daniel's. He winks and nods his head at her. She ignores it then her eyes widen when they lock with mine.
"Oh, my God! Hey!" she says waving her hand at me. I wave back. Everyone's attention averts to me and they're shooting daggers.
"Ew, what's so special about Jesus Freak?" a voice whispers.
"What? Him?" I hear Daniel ask.
I still can't believe she's here. Daniel shoots a look at me that makes me feel like I'm gonna get a beating after school.
She makes her way to the projection of the seating chart and searches for her name. It's sorted by last names, that's why I didn't recognize who was about to sit next to me. Once she finds her last name, which is Lor, she walks past everyone and to the desk on my right. When she sits down she takes her cyan-blue backpack and sets it down beside her.
"Hey, handsome," she says her voice sounding deep, soothing, and sultry "I guess we're sitting next to each other."
Wait? Did she just call me handsome? Me?
"Uh—yeah. We are. What are the odds?"
When I look behind me and see Jesus, he's laughing. I mouth 'thank you' to him.
"I have a serious question," she says with a straight face.
"Yeah. Of course. Shoot."
"Well, I was gonna save this for after the movie but..."
My face starts to heat up. What is she gonna ask? Is she gonna ask to kiss me? Right in front of everyone? Daniel especially?
"I'm trying to create a final boss for my campaign and I'm struggling with making them interesting. I don't want to be a generic bad guy. Like—I want him to be memorable. I want him to stick in the player's head. You know, make a really good impression. Any ideas?"
"Hmm..." I think about it for a moment "I think what makes a villain memorable is if they single out the player."
She puts her cheek in her right palm and tilts her head a little, "Go on."
"Like—if they have a connection with the hero. Batman and The Joker. Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker. Maybe have them take interest in the player."
"Oh! Like they've been studying the player."
"Yeah! Have you ever played Far Cry Three?"
"No, but I've heard about it."
"Well, it has an amazing villain. His name is Vaas. You should definitely look him up on YouTube. People love talking about him."
She unzips her backpack and pulls out a black leather notebook. She opens it, pulls out a pen, and starts writing down what we've discussed. This is the first time a woman besides my Mom is listening to what I have to say. I had no idea it would feel so nice.
"Hey," I start, "I've never seen you around school before. Did we just always have different classes?"
"Oh, no. I just moved here a few days ago," she stops writing and looks up at me.
"That makes sense."
"Good morning class!" Mrs. Durnumn shouts over everyone's talking "May I have your attention please?"
The ambient sound of people talking dies down and all of us are looking at Mrs. Durnumn. She has sweatpants on and a shirt with the school mascot, a black and grey hawk, on it.
"Today is the first day of school so we won't be doing any work. Instead, we'll be getting to know each other! Everyone, find someone you haven't seen before and introduce yourselves!"
Some groan as we stand from our desks and begin looking for someone to awkwardly exchange small talk with. But that won't be a problem for me. Because I can just talk to Delilah. I turn towards her and I'm met with Daniel's back sticking in my face.
"Sup. I'm Daniel," He says in a voice he doesn't normally talk in.
"Delilah," She reaches out her hand and he shakes it. I guess I'm not talking to Delilah. I look around the room, trying to make eye contact with people. The first person I do immediately looks away. I see a girl, Stacy Flannigon, and I start walking toward her. She starts to look around in a panic then scurries off in the opposite direction, losing me in the crowd. At this moment, everyone has found someone to talk to, except for me.
"Oh, It's okay Judas. I can talk to you," Mrs. Durnumn says. I've always admired her kindness. She stands in front of me and everyone starts conversing.
"How are you, Judas?" Mrs. Durnumn asks.
"I'm great," I tell her "I enjoyed the summer break."
"That's good..."
I start tuning her out and begin listening to the conversation between Delilah and Daniel. They're only a desk behind me.
"What are you trying to tell me?" Delilah asks.
"That I feel bad your sitting next to Judas," Daniel says "We all know he's annoying. Plus he's an orphan. He doesn't deserve to sit next to a beautiful woman like you! At lunch, why don't you come hang out with me?"
I grimace. I forgot I told Daniel he could pursue Delilah. I had no idea we were talking about the same woman.
"Actually, I'm an orphan," Delilah says. My mouth opens and I look toward her. She's looking up at Daniel with a straight, elegant face, "And how is he annoying?"
"He's crazy! He talks to himself all the time. People say he was abused by his mom when he was a kid. And he goes around with that smile on his face like nothing's wrong. He's fake."
"Well, I haven't lived a good life as you seem to think. So if for some reason your upbringing limits the circle of people you interact with, I suggest you forget about us being friends."
"No, but you're different, right? You know, Jesus Freak's mother was—"
"I've never even met my parents," this hits me right in the gut for some reason.
"You're just defending him because you feel sorry for him."
"No. You're wrong. I'm just stating the truth."
"Whatever, you just don't seem to get it."
I think I'm gonna really like Delilah.
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We talk to at least two other people before sitting down. Well, I say 'talk' but for me, it didn't go so smoothly. I ended up with Stacy somehow and before I could say anything she told me, "Look, I don't wanna talk to you and you don't wanna talk to me, okay?"
"I actually wouldn't mind talking to you."
She rolled her eyes then pulled out her phone and stared at it until we switched. My next partner was a freshman named Damian. He talked my ear off the entire time, asking questions about being a freshman. The dos and don'ts and all that. It was nice to listen to somebody who didn't know my history or mock me.
When we sit back down at our desks Delilah leans over to me.
"So, you wanna hang out at lunch?" she asks.
"I'd love to," I tell her.
"Cool. Show me what room you'll be in so I can meet you there."
I show her my schedule. When she puts hers beside mine she smiles.
"What?" I ask.
"We have all the same classes together."
I look down at the schedules she's holding and sure enough, we have every single class together. Even the same off hour.
I turn back toward Jesus and he has the biggest grin. The sly dog.
"What kind of music do you listen to?" she asks.
I start to tell her about my favorite bands. It turns out we both love Daughter. We continue to talk about, well, everything. We talk for what seems like forever. We talk about instruments, she knows how to play guitar and likes to sing, because of course she does. I tell her I like to read the bible. She also likes to draw. We both love spicy food and cats. She wants to get into Magic: The Gathering but has nobody to play with. I offer to play with her and she says, "It's a date."
I've only known this woman for thirty minutes at most, and I know I'm going to marry her one day. She's the one. There's no doubt about it.
The bell rings and we walk together, still talking, to our next class. We talk through that entire class, then, talk in the halls, and talk in the next. Repeat this two more times then we get to lunch.
"I don't have money for lunch," she says.
"I could pay," I tell her pulling out a twenty my Mom gave me for lunch.
"No don't. Please."
"No, really it's—"
"I said no."
I put the twenty back and there's an awkward silence between us.
"Sorry, I just—don't like people having to pay for me."
"I get it. No worries."
We both decide to sit at our lockers, which are also conveniently next to each other.
"Why is everyone staring at you?" she asks as we sit down against our lockers.
"Everyone's staring at me?"
"Yeah. In all the classes we were in and in the hallways. People kept shooting you looks."
I could think of a thousand reasons why I was being stared at. One of them being I'm me and I'm talking to the most gorgeous woman in Hawkings High. Two, she's the most gorgeous woman in Hawkings High, so she might be thinking everyone's looking at me when in fact everyone's looking at her.
"I'm kind of known as the weirdo around here," I tell her.
"Well, you don't weird me out."
Her green ocean eyes sparkle and I have to look away to avoid blushing.
"You barely know me," I counter.
"I'm good at reading people. And you don't seem like a threat."
"Tell that to Daniel. It'd take a miracle not to face his wrath by the end of the day."
"Why's that?"
"Well, you're more interested in me than him. Which isn't the normal reaction girls have with him."
"Daniel's a fuckboy. And an asshole. Who cares what he thinks?"
"He's got a particular way of life, yes. But I don't think he's an asshole."
"Really? He seems like a douche."
"He can come off that way but, he's sweet deep down. There was this one kid in freshman year that was giving me a hard time. Daniel got in his face and the kid stopped messing with me. When I thanked Daniel, he just shrugged me off. He continued to call me 'Jesus Freak' and gives me a hard time, but if anyone else does the same he's sure to correct them."
"Hm. So he's a bully that bullies other bullies for bullying the kid he likes to bully."
"Basically. He's a good guy."
"Well, I'm surprised you have such a high opinion of him."
"Gotta love your neighbors!"
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At the end of the day, I offer to walk her home and she accepts. So far, we're going down the same path I walk home so it's not inconvenient.
"Judas?"
"Yeah?"
"Why did you ask me out?"
Oh no. I had to be careful how I answered this question.
"Because... I wouldn't mind being around you for the rest of my life."
Our eyes meet and my face burns hot. I turn away and I can't believe I just said that. That was too much. She's surely cringing at me.
I hear her laugh, "You're cute when you're flustered." she says which makes me more flustered. She laughs more. When we get to my house she stops in front of me.
"Thanks for walking me home!" she says.
"Wait you live near here?"
"Yeah. That's my house," she points to the house across the street. It was for sale just a few days ago. But now the 'For Sale' sign is gone and there are two cars in the driveway.
She's my new neighbor. Oh my God could this get any better?
"See you tonight," she says. We linger a bit before she decides to turn around and head to her house. I watch her walk in through the blue door and I stand in my driveway.
"So, how was school?" Jesus asks. He's standing to my right.
"Dude, I can't believe it. Delilah Lor is a woman that I'm going out with. Tonight. Oh God, I hope I don't mess this up."
"You'll be fine. Whatever happens, happens. Just be yourself. She seems to like that."
I think about it. Then a thought enters my head. One that I don't like.
"Hey, Jesus?"
"Yes, Judas?"
"Is this going to end well for us? Or will something happen between us?"
"You know the rule. I can't spoil anything. Just know that every relationship will be tested."
"Yeah. Right. I know that. It's just—I don't want this to backfire. I trust you, it's just, I can't help but admit I'm nervous about the future."
"Lay your anxieties onto me. Don't worry about tomorrow. Tomorrow will worry about itself. Worry about right now. And right now, you should take a shower and wear something nice. Not too nice though."
"Yeah. You're right. Let's get ready for the date."
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