If I keep getting friends at this rate, we're gonna run out of room for them in my car. Daniel can barely fit between Lucy and Squid in the back while Delilah is in the passenger seat. Besides the occasional 'Jesus Freak' thrown at me, today was a good day. I feel like it's just up from here.
I park in the driveway and we all get out of my car. However, I notice Lucy hang back as everyone else enters my house.
"Everything okay?" I ask, standing in front of her.
"I—I need to apologize to Delilah."
"For what?"
"For cheating on her. That's why we broke up. I was a dumb, reckless kid back then. Hell, I still am. But that isn't an excuse for the way I treated her."
"Do you want me to go get her?"
"No. I'll do it."
Lucy walks past me and enters my house. When I follow her, She's standing in front of the three of them when she says: "Delilah, I'm sorry."
Everyone stops talking and moves their attention to Lucy.
"For what?" Delilah asks, standing in between Squid and Daniel.
"For—for—wait. There's something in your hair. Upper right side."
Delilah feels the upper right spot of her head and her eyes widen.
"Someone stook gum in my hair," Delilah tells us.
We're all taken back. Especially me. I was around her all day and I didn't notice. There were hundreds of people around us. It could've been anyone.
I thought everyone loved Delilah. But they're targeting her now too. All because of me.
"My hair is ruined," Delilah cries, looking at the camera on her phone.
"Hey, hey, no worries," Lucy says, "I'm an expert when it comes to hair. I just need some scissors. You got those right Judas? Judas? Judas!"
I snap out of it, "Yeah," I say, bewildered "In the kitchen. We should all move there. We can do her haircut there."
I then get a towel and a pair of steel hair-clipping scissors while Delilah sits in the center of the kitchen. I hand Lucy the items and move to the left countertop where Squid and Daniel are standing to my left.
"If I find out whoever did this I'm headbutting the mother fucker," Daniel says, his arms crossed.
"That's just so petty," Squid says, "Delilah has beautiful hair. Hopefully, Lucy can salvage it."
This is all my fault. It's only a matter of time before something worse happens. The longer these people are around me, the more in danger they are. I need to do something.
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When Lucy's done she holds up her phone and uses the camera as a mirror.
"Whatcha think?" Lucy asks. Delilah takes the phone out of her hand and examines her work extensively.
I actually prefer this look over the old one, though I know I couldn't tell Delilah that. About a quarter of her right side has been sliced down to a half inch. She could make any haircut look amazing.
"Thank you, Lucy," Delilah starts, "You know, I've been kind of a dick to you since you joined the group. And it's kind of hypocritical of me to hold your past against you when I don't do it to Judas. People who play favorites are, well, posers. So I guess what I'm trying to say is, as long as we got each other, I think we'll have a good year. Right Judas?"
Everyone shifts their gaze at me and I feel like Peter being asked if he was with Jesus.
I have to tell them. I've been thinking about it and I know this is the right thing to do.
"You guys can't be around me," I say to all of them.
"What do you mean?" Daniel asks.
"You okay, Judas?" Squid asks.
"Yeah, what's wrong?" Delilah stands up, letting the towel around her neck fall to the ground.
"The longer I'm around you all the worse this will get," I confess, "The name-calling. Putting gum in people's hair—"
"Judas," Delilah interrupts, "Those are all harmless pranks we can handle it—"
"It gets worse!" I say, my voice booming through the kitchen. Everyone's staring at me now. Like I'm a monster, "Everything I come into contact with turns to ruin! I've done nothing but make your lives worse by being in them."
Delilah briskly walks up to me and puts her hands around my face.
"Judas, listen to me—" she starts, "You haven't made my life worse. You've done the exact opposite. My life sucked before you came along. I didn't have any friends. But I do now. And that's because of you."
"I checked all the social networking shit the students used while Lucy was cutting your hair. They're tearing you apart in the comments Delilah. Calling things I wouldn't dare say. All because you chose to date me. Me."
"Judas—that—my singing is just a stupid hobby. And while I think it's sweet that you believe this, I'm not good enough to be a star—"
"No—"
"Yes, Judas I'm just a normal girl with too many problems like the rest of them—"
"No, you're not!" I rip out of her grip and take a step back, "Delilah, you are a God send. I didn't have anyone in my life before I met you. And not just you, all of you! All of you are fucking extraordinary. And what am I? I'm the crazy kid who can see Jesus! When I was younger, and Squid you'll remember this, I was a real dick. A self-righteous asshole. And when I told people I could see and hear The Son Of God not one—not a single fucking person looked at me like I was sane except for you, Delilah. So don't tell me that you're not amazing enough to be a star and that you're 'normal' because the truth is you'd be in the clouds if it weren't for me walking into that Chick-fil-A."
"Judas, what are you saying?" Lucy asks.
I run my hand over my face and point my finger at the door, "I need you all to get out of my house," I say.
Shock strikes all three of them like a lightning bolt.
"What?" Daniel asks.
"You can't be serious?" Squid asks.
"I'll have my classes and locker changed in the morning so you won't have to be in contact with me," I say to them, mainly to Delilah.
"You can't just shut us out of your life," Lucy says.
"Judas," Delilah says. Everyone else falls silent, "What about us? What happens to us?"
I can't look her in the eyes. I stare at the kitchen floor as I say, "Like water and oil. We were never meant to mix. I'm sorry."
I don't look, but I can feel their gazes. They don't say a word. Squid is the first to leave. Then Daniel. Lucy. And then just me and Delilah. We stand there for a while. I'm expecting her to say something. To cuss me out. To scream at me and pound on my chest. But she doesn't. I just listen to the sound of her footsteps leaving the kitchen and exiting my house, closing the door behind her.
Jesus is standing in the living room, not saying a word.
"Don't you even start," I snap at him, "You knew that this would happen. You knew that everyone around me would be hurt because of you. You had to have known that appearing in my life would have complicated things. I was a kid! And now they're all suffering because I can see and hear you. Why me? What made me so special? Why am I the one that has to go through this? Is God some sick author dragging me through the mud for character development? Well, I won't have it. I'm done. Why are you just standing there? Say something!"
He takes a moment before saying, "When I met you Judas, you were starving, confused, angry, and sad. You're innocence was taken at such a young age. You haven't known what it's like to grow up like a normal child. I'm in your life because you need me. I'm sorry this is happening to you. But your friends love you, and you can't do this alone."
A typical Jesus answer.
"Just fuck off, Jesus," I blurt out, "Go bother someone who deserves it."
I storm off to my room and close the door behind me. I feel like a tornado, tearing through everything in its path. And when I feel like this, there's one thing I do to try to calm these storms. So I search for my bible in my nightstand. When I find it I sit in my bed and set it in my lap.
It's the same bible I've had since I was a kid. The blue leather cover is fading and the pages have colored sticky notes sticking out of them with various notes written on them. I flip to a random page in it and read a random verse. However, the verse I read doesn't seem to make sense:
Do not resist the one who is evil.
I close the bible and toss it on my nightstand. Laying back in my bed, I decide to think about my next course of action.
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I'm in the kitchen getting a glass of water when I hear a knock at the door. I'm not ready to face one of my friends right now. I don't have the energy to argue with them about why I made the choice I made.
"Yo! It's Lucy! I can hear you in there! Can we talk?"
I sigh, set the glass down, and make my way to the front door. When I open it, I'm greeted by Lucy in a black leather jacket with studs engraved in honeycomb patterns on her shoulders and forearms. She's wearing fingerless gloves with holes at the knuckles and glove ends, skinny black jeans, and black high-heel boots. She's actually looking down on me with the height of her shoes.
"Hey, how are you?" She asks.
"You shouldn't be here."
"Do you think I really give a shit about what comes after me if I hang around you? I'm the Devil. You're like The Pope compared to the people I've been around, Judy."
"I appreciate the compliment, but really. I'm just in you're way."
I go to close the door when she blurts out: "I know who stuck gum in Delilah's hair."
I stop.
"You see, Judy, this is your problem. You're too selfless. Instead of punishing those responsible, you'd rather punish yourself. It's easier to blame yourself. But really, shouldn't we punish those responsible for hurting us in the first place?"
"What do you mean by punish?"
"Well unfortunately we can't kill them. But why not rough 'em up a little?"
"Oh—I could never—"
"Come now, Judy I know! That's why I'll do it for you."
"What?"
"I know how to fight. You just have to watch my six and make sure nobody finds us."
Am I really gonna help Lucy do this? I'm not going to lay a hand on whoever did that to Delilah, but I'm still playing a part.
But then I think about that verse: Do not resist the one who is evil.
"Let me get a jacket," I say.
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We decide to walk. My car would give us away.
"So who did it?" I ask Lucy. It begins to snow. The first snowfall of fall has begun.
"Does it matter?"
"Well if it's a girl I don't want to do this."
She laughs, "Don't worry. It's not a girl."
"What're you gonna do once we get there?"
"Well last I checked they like to hang out in their house, so I'm just gonna sneak up behind them and jump 'em. They should be home alone. Once I feel like enough's enough we'll split."
"Okay."
"Nervous?"
"Me? No? Do I look nervous?"
"Dude. You're shaking."
"I'm not!"
"Are too!"
We walk for a bit in silence.
"Lucy?" I ask.
"Yeah?"
"I'm glad you're in my life."
"Don't get mushy on me."
"No really. At first, you scared me a little but I've come to learn you're really sweet. And funny."
"Well, you're not so bad yourself."
We come across the backyard of a house when Lucy puts her hand on my chest.
"We're here," she says, "Stay here and watch my back."
She begins to climb the chain link fence and hops over to the other side. It's getting colder by the minute. I turn around and make sure no one is watching us. What I see is me and Lucy's footprints and a couple of streetlights. But—there's something else behind a tree about fifty feet away from me. I squint my eyes to get a better view and I see it's a silhouette. Someone from afar leaning from behind a tree. I can't make out any details, all I can see is a shadow. But they can see me, I'm sure of it.
I don't know what to do. I can't warn Lucy, I don't have a phone. I'm stuck in a stare-down with this shadowy mass. Then a flashing light comes from its chest, like one that would come from taking a photo of a camera.
Someone grabs my right shoulder and I scream. I spin around to whoever it is and see Lucy with her eyes wide.
"We gotta go!" she says.
"Did you do it?"
"Yeah—Now come on."
"Wait. Someone was watching us."
"What? Where?"
"At that tree over—"
I point at the tree and the silhouette is nowhere in sight.
"I swear there was someone there," I say.
"I believe you but we gotta go now!"
She begins to run and I follow her.
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Lucy stops running under a street light and I'm a few steps behind her. We hunch over with our hands on our knees and try to catch our breaths. I then see the blood on Lucy's knuckles. She then begins to laugh.
"What?" I ask.
"That was so fun!" she says, lifting her head up exposing a red blotch on her lower left cheek.
"Are you okay?" I ask, making my way to her.
"I'm fine. What do you mean?"
"You have a bruise on your cheek," I say, putting my fingers gently on it. She hisses when I make contact with her warm flesh.
"Oh. He hit me. Huh."
Our eyes meet. Our breathing slows. The snowflakes cascade onto us; ashes burying us. She leans in and I feel myself doing the same.
"Judas," she says.
"Yeah."
"Do you love Delilah?"
The question hits me and I stop. I pull away. I haven't thought about her at all this entire time.
And then it all comes rushing back. She's the first woman to go on a date with me. She's the first woman to not think I'm crazy for seeing and hearing Jesus. She defended me with Squid. She went to church with me even though she hated God. She sang to me. She kissed me. She held my hand when everyone else persecuted me. And above all, she has never lost faith in me.
"I do," I tell Lucy.
"Then you should be with the people you love."
Delilah's house is about ten minutes away. Five if I run. I give Lucy the hardest hug I've ever given someone and begin sprinting to Delilah's house.
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I ring the doorbell to Delilah's house at least five times before stopping. I can taste my blood in the back of my mouth and feel my heart thumping in my throat.
The door opens and it's Don, one of Delilah's Dads.
"She's upstairs," he says.
I briskly walk through the house and make my way upstairs. When I get to her door, I stop. I'm about to knock, but it's like there's an impenetrable wall of air around it.
"Delilah, it's Judas," I say. No answer, "Can I come in?" Nothing, "Look I'm gonna come in. Please don't kill me."
I twist the doorknob and open the door. Delilah's room is simple, yet elegant. The walls are painted tangerine orange, and everything else is blue.
When I see her, she's sitting on the edge of her bed, her back facing me. She's wearing a winter jacket that's covered in little wet droplets. I take a seat next to her and she doesn't turn around.
"Delilah, I know you must feel strange about seeing me. But I want you to know, that I'm really, really fucking sorry. I am so sorry and ashamed of the things I said. I don't know how I could ever make it up to you but I—"
She spins around and embraces me.
"How—how could you just forgive me?" I ask, "I thought you'd be furious."
She pulls back, tears falling from those ocean eyes.
"I was never angry at you," she says, "I was just scared I lost you."
"Does this mean we're still together?"
"I'll never leave your side Judas."
She hugs me again and I see Jesus standing in the corner. His look and his silence are all the answers I need.
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I have breakfast with Delilah and her Dads the next morning. They're asking me typical boyfriend questions when an image of Matthew on the news on the TV in the kitchen catches my eye.
"Can you turn up the TV?" I ask.
Philip, Delilah's other Dad, turns around with the remote and turns the TV up.
"Matthew Deltoro was found dead in his backyard this morning officials say after being beaten..."
They show the same backyard that Lucy and I were in just last night. My heart sinks to the floor.
"You okay?" Delilah asks.
"That's Matthew. From school," I say.
But not just that. Me and Lucy were there. If Matthew was the one who stuck gum in Delilah's hair, then Lucy was the one to beat him up. But Lucy didn't kill him, right? No, she said she left him alive. She could be lying. But what about the silhouette? Were they involved with this? Did they go in and finish the job?
I reach for Delilah's hand, grabbing it tight. I'm going to need a firm foundation to get through this storm.184Please respect copyright.PENANAl8ZxA2JaRx
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