Today was the day; it was the day that I was going on my first official date ever; everything had to be perfect. I was so excited, and I woke up at 8 am. I got a message from him, and I swore my heart stopped because it was pounding so hard. The message said
"Hey, I just can't wait to see you. You make everything better for me!" Lee texted.
I was so happy. He picked me up in his vehicle, and we headed towards the Art Museum, which was full of art of all kinds, from paintings to sculptures. The place was inspiring, and we had such a fantastic time. I got to know him for who he was. He talked about art. He talked about music. We found a lot of things we had in common. He was truly an interesting man. He acted differently around me than with his friends. I liked the way he reacted to things when we were alone. Later we decided to eat at a local Italian restaurant.
"Hey, did you know you're my favorite person in the world?" he said as he shoved some pasta in his mouth. I tried not to spit out my food because it reminded me of anime.
"Hold on, let me get that on recording," I encouraged. I thought to myself this man thinks so much of me, why can't I believe what he says about myself?
I took out my phone and saw that my Gramsta was blowing up. It turns out that Lee was tagging me in a photo with him while going on our date. I smiled and looked at him and said, "Lee, you're so silly; why did you tag me in a Gramsta photo?"
"Because you're so cute!" he said while ruffling his hair
"Are you kidding me? I look bad, and now all the guys are following me!" I put my hands in front of my face to cover up the fact that I was blushing.
"Tell them no, you're all mine," he laughed
"Oh?" I conclusively questioned
I kissed him on the cheek, and he turned rose red. He turned to kiss me on the lips, but then our waiter came after our meal.
"So can I get you guys any dessert?" the waiter questioned
"No, thank you; we'll go eat ice cream at my house," he replied. The waiter was flirting with him, but he wasn't reciprocating.
"I have to powder my nose," I lied. I had to take my antihistamines.
I went into the bathroom with the intent to look beautiful. When I came back, things got worse.
I heard these girls laughing behind me as I walked in; it turned out that I got my period while I was in my nice white skirt. My hygiene products were in my purse, so I tried to see if I could sneak to the table, but Lee wasn't there, so I wasn't worried until he came up behind me. Instead of laughing at me for it, he was so sweet and put his sweater around my waist. He didn't mention it but insisted on letting me go home instead of his house. I didn't want to ruin the date, so I ignored it.
We were getting into his car as it was dusk and humid outside. Lee was in his car and told me that it was going to rain; I was scared. What if he finds out that I have aquagenic urticaria? Will he be mad that I didn't tell him, or would he respect my privacy and understand why I didn't tell him?
Just as I'm gazing out the window of his Fourd Fock, another Fourd Fock pulls up. It's Aaron, and he's with a girl I knew, but I can't remember her name. She wasn't important anyways.
"Want to race?" asked Aaron.
"I'll beat you," replied Lee.
I rolled my eyes. "Boys will be boys, I guess."
"It's fraidy wady," shouted Neisha from the passenger seat.
"Ohhhhh. It's Neisha," I thought to myself. I tell myself that she still isn't anything important to worry about.
Aaron tells Neisha to knock it off, but she won't, so he just gives in and lets her call me names.
The light turns green, and the race is on. Lee is laughing as he is being beaten by Aaron.
He turns to me and says, "I let Aaron win because he can't win at anything else!"
I laugh, "that's sweet." But it sure sounds like Lee is putting himself on a pedestal.
He smiled but didn't say anything. I got home, and he opened the door for me.
"Goodnight!"
He leaned in for a kiss, but the thunder went off, and I had to get inside before it started raining.
"Just in the nick of time!!!" My mom screamed at me. "Don't you understand the rain is dangerous? Right as you stepped inside, the rain started roaring. I can't lose you! You're all I have!!! If I lost you, I'd lose myself. You mean everything to me!" My mom started crying.
My mom hadn't told me that Kylina had passed away; the one person I talked to about my depression was gone. I couldn't tell my grandma, the one I was named after, that I loved her. Her funeral was in a couple of weeks; we picked out the casket and went to the funeral. Lee was there because they knew her, but I didn't talk to him. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I walked up to the open casket and said goodbye. I started crying to the point where my nose was running. I heard somebody get out of their seat. I hoped it was Lee to make sure that I was okay. He grabbed me, and I wrapped my arms around his waist as he hugged me like there was no tomorrow.
"It's okay, Kylie. She's in a better place now. God needed her as an angel. She will watch down on you for the rest of your life." I felt his warm tight embrace.
He grabbed my hand and kissed it. I momentarily stopped crying as I felt his heart beating and calmed down. After the burial, I got home, and I could feel the mood was more depressing and sad rather than joyful and happy. I heard a buzz in my pocket.
"Kylie r, u doing ok?" asked Lee.
"No, not really could use a cuddle, buddy."
"I just finished working out, so I can take a shower before coming over."
"No, don't take a shower. I'll see you tomorrow; I will be in class...hopefully"
"Kylie, I know this isn't the best time to ask you but will you be my girlfriend, it's just I care about you, and I want to change my Facebook status. :) Since we've been non-stop flirting for a long time."
"It's just not a good time right now, Lee, I'm sorry."
"Okay, I'll pick you up for school!?"
"Sure :)"
The next day came by and it was just cold and rainy out which is surprising in Nevada it's always hot and humid which is why I live here, does God not want me to be happy, this is so stupid. While banging my head against the wall, I figured I'd grab my phone and text him.
"Lee, I can't go to school." I texted.
"Why not, is it me?" He responded.
"No" I said.
"Why are you so secretive? You're not supposed to keep secrets from your boyfriend."
"Huh?" Why did he say boyfriend?
"Best friend. Oops, autocorrect! I just always felt like you trusted me, and now you're keeping something from me, I feel it." he said. I don't know how it would autocorrect to boyfriend. I laughed inside thinking about it. It was a good excuse!
"I don't have to tell you everything. You have no idea what it's like living life the way I do, I have to watch myself every day and every time I see somebody."
"What do you mean? I thought you never had a boyfriend, is it like something bad that happened to you, should I be worried?"
"You don't understand, no you are the first experience I've ever had, but I don't think I'm ready to tell you."
"But you can trust me; you know about me, maybe not everything, but if you want to be friends, I'm okay with it; I'll respect it."
"So you're giving up."
"If you don't want to be with me, it's okay."
"That's not it at all; I don't want you to be with one person for your entire life who has a disease. You need to experience something else before you're trapped with me."
"What do you mean disease?"
"There's a reason Leah calls me Fraidy Wady."
"Your Waders? I always thought you looked cute in them. They brightened my day! Why don't you wear them anymore?" He questioned me.
"I have Aquagenic Urticaria; I can never experience a normal human life. I'll never be able to touch water or even imagine going swimming. You'd be missing out on so much with me. So before you commit to me, you need to experience everything normal people do like skinny dipping, water slides, etc."
I received no response. I looked outside my window to try and get Lee's attention by throwing little pebbles at his window that were sitting on my window ledge. Lee wasn't answering. He was playing Craftymine or listening to music, or maybe he was avoiding me. I called his number and just got his voicemail. I must have called him ten times before I finally gave up.
When I woke up in the morning, I woke up with my mom standing over me.
"Get up, it's so beautiful outside, and I want to .go for a walk."
She started to see a therapist about my grandma, and the therapist told her exercise is very therapeutic.
"God, leave me alone. I'm trying to sleep." I grumpily yanked the covers back over my head.
"Maybe you shouldn't be spending so much time dating Lee," she replied.
"I'M NOT DATING HIM; HE'S JUST MY BEST FRIEND. ANYWAYS HE WON'T TALK TO ME SINCE I TOLD HIM I HAD AQUAGENIC URTICARIA!" I exclaimed to her.
My mom answered the phone as she felt the buzzing in the pocket and went downstairs to the other room.
I followed her and tried eavesdropping, but my mom closed the door. She was almost whispering like there was something she had to hide. Something from me, I was worried about who she was talking to on my phone.
"Okay, thanks for letting me know; I'll tell her to call you."
My mom opened the door abruptly. "Call Marissa; she needs to tell you something."
"Okay"
I ran back up the stairs to my room and closed the door. I called Marissa. When I started dialing, I locked the door because I didn't want my mom walking in on my conversation.
"Marissa, what's going on?" I breathed a little heavy from running up the stairs.
"Kylie, hey, how are you doing.?"
"I'm worried about Lee. I mean, he hasn't answered my texts at all, and I didn't see him at home this last weekend at all."
"Wait, you don't know yet?"
"What do you mean?"
"His phone is broken. He dropped it while staying at his friend's; he's out getting a new one right now! It broke into like a million pieces."
I was thinking to myself that maybe he didn't get my text. Perhaps he passed out before he received it. That would be a relief not to have to worry whether he knows or not. I didn't mean to say it to him like that. I wanted to say it in a way that he wouldn't freak out. Let's hope he didn't freak out.
I sat at the window all day waiting for his return, then it turned to dusk. I peered out the window as headlights flashed in my window. It was Lee turning into his driveway, but he had company. A beautiful blonde girl. She has nice heels, long legs, and tan with an exposed belly piercing. She is dressed in a very stylish dress.
I threw a pillow across the room, "Why didn't I say yes to being his girlfriend? Why was I so stupid to have friendzoned him!!! I friendzoned him because I loved him. I didn't want to lose him, and now he's gone!" I thought to myself. "That girl is beautiful and I am nothing but a loser with a disgusting disease that never lets me do anything normal people can. He probably did get my message and said I wasn't worth it. He probably chose to have a different person in his rather than me." I was so mad at myself for telling him.
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