The drama was not nearly finished for the next two weeks. You see, as a member of the drama club(I can't believe how literal that is), I have a play to rehearse to. I spent extra hours after school and within classes to practice my lines. I hate to say it, but in a way, it was a good excuse to avoid spending so much time with Ryan. There is no actual reason for that, but I guess it's just the feeling in my gut.
Ryan did not do anything wrong, or at least I hope he didn't. But after I've seen his reaction to what his dad had done, it made me look at him differently. He kind of took his side in the matter and gave him excuses. It made me furious to think he believed Marc didn't do anything wrong, or at least he did but he had his reasons. I can not find a reasonable excuse to give Marc for what he did. He's an asshole and he doesn't deserve all the love Kat is giving him, and I solely believe in this.
I tried several times to tell Kat about it, or at least warn her of Marc. But every time I look at her and see her smile, I lose all the determination in me. I don't want to hurt Kat. I don't' want to make her relive the pain all over again. I don't want to remind her of all the hurtful things that happened in her past.
I was there when Danielle Howards decided to fuck their lives over. He blatantly told Kat how he fell for his secretary. He told her he was having an affair for two years, knowing that it wasn't right, yet he still did it.
"I still love you, but I just love her more," he'd said baldly. He reaches out to hold her shoulders, but she takes a step back. "I just don't want this to affect my relationship with my son."
"So you remember him, huh?" Kat kept a calm face. "Get out of my house. You just lost both of us."
And Danielle left without another word, without another attempt to get his son, without one glance at his "son", who stood at the top of the staircase next to me with a frozen body. After that, Cody told me that he hated his father; it was his first time to use such a word--hate. But I know better. Cody doesn't hate his father; in fact, there is no such a thing as hate for a parent no matter what they've done. And maybe it's just because I lost both my parents and I'm longing for their love, but I'm sure that's a part of Cody still wants his dad back.
Today will be the day that I will tell Kat about Marc. Today is also the day when I humiliate myself in front of everyone. No matter how I look at it, dressing up as a princess is possibly more dreadful than telling Kat the truth.
A girl, called Mallika or something, was carefully styling my hair after adding the final touches to my makeup. I specifically told her to keep it simple, but she insisted on applying as much makeup as her heart desires. Although it felt like she was putting a ton of it on my face, now that I look at it, I actually don't hate it. My eyes were tinted with nude eyeshadows and my eyelashes were curled upward thick and long. My face had a little of everything, or at least that's what she claimed--concealer, foundation, bronzer, and blush. My lips were a dark rosy color, and I really dig it. I wore my hair in a half-updo with the rest of it lying down on my shoulders with curled ends.
I looked great, and it made me a little okay about the whole thing. But then I remembered there was a huge dress waiting for me in the dressing room, and I don't feel okay anymore.
I studied the dress from afar without touching it. It was a massive lavender chiffon dress with too many flowers. The bust had flowers, the sleeves had flowers, and the waistline had flowers. I didn't completely hate the dress, but it was quite exaggerated to me. I doubt I'll be able to walk in this, much less act a whole play.
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I struggle to put on the dress, and when I do, I struggle more to zip it up. I was cursing when I heard someone behind the door. I'm not kidding when I say a tree just fell outside the room. It's Josh, who thinks he'll be a good tree in the play. I can't believe he's a senior.
I help him up and he thanks me.
"Sure," I say, supporting my dress up before it falls off. "Do you mind helping me with something?"
"Not at all." His face was squished into the small opening in the costume. He looked kind of cute, to be honest. Like 5-year-old cute.
"Will you zip me up," I give my back to him and watch his face change color in the mirror.
"I can see your underwear," he talks with a red face.
"It's okay, no big deal," I shake my head. "Just pull the zipper real quick."
He pulls the zipper up halfway through and hurries away from me in his costume, which just makes him look more foolish than he already is. I manage to zip the rest of it before I left the room.
"Morgan left these for you," Mallika placed a pair of silver heels on the floor.
"Um, no," I chuckle.
"Um, yes," she gave me a sarcastic smile and left the room. What a bitch. She probably doesn't like me. And the feeling's mutual.
The shoes looked scary, while my vans looked like a thing from heaven. I mean, no one's going to know, right? The dress is so long that it hides my feet. I balance both options in my mind, and I choose walking over falling and embarrassing myself more than I already will.
I take the first look in the mirror, and I don't recognize myself. I looked like a completely different person. Not only am I wearing a dress for the first time since I can remember, but my face also seems unfamiliar to me. I inhale sharply and take it all in. I really do look like a princess, and a very small part of me actually likes it.
And I think, screw you Jordan.
"Nicole, are you ready?" Morgan called from behind me. I nod and take one last look at myself before I walk to the stage.
I don't look at the audience; I just walk in, bow down like I was taught, and look back up again. My eyes immediately caught my friends, who occupied the first row as expected. They had a stunned expression, unlike the rest of the audience that clapped in sync.
I dismiss them and start my line.The play goes on, and whenever I look at the guys, I find them wearing the same expression, only less shocked and more focused. The play ends with all the actors bowing down with respect to the audience, and I thank everything holy in this world that it's over.
But I was wrong. It wasn't nearly done.
Backstage, I met the guys, and I loathed the day I first met them. They're not nice people, I tell you.
"Nicole, you look," Cody said with the same stunned look, moving his eyes up and down my body. His expression changes, and he literally snorts before he starts laughing. Of course, everyone starts laughing along. "What the fuck did they do to you here?"
"Shut up," I attempt to walk towards him so I can hit him, but I trip on the stupid dress, which makes them laugh even harder.
"Dude, you look like cotton candy!" Jordan jokes. I gather my dress in my hands and manage to lift it up to my knees. I tackle Jordan to the floor, and now I'm on top of him throwing fists and spitting curses at him. This is all because of him.
"Hey, hey!" Kat tries to separate us. Morgan had her hands clasped on her chest in shock so dramatically. I know what she sees—wild animals.
"Nicole!" Morgan gasps. "What are those shoes?"
Oops.
I pull my dress up to show her my vans. I hope she doesn't start ranting because right now, Kat is there to help her out.
"What happened to the ones I sent you? She asks.
"They looked scary. It'll be suicidal to put them on," I shrugged.
She sighs, "I'm just going to ignore that since you've done a great job out there. Everyone loved it."
"Thanks."
"You lacked enthusiasm in rehearsal, I didn't think you'll be that good," Morgan exclaimed. "And guess who was there to watch you."
We all anticipated her answer.
"The acting director of Juilliard," she exclaimed.
"No fucking way!" I cry out.
"I'm going to ignore that too, but please try to put a filter up there," Morgan smiles, and she looks like she's scared she'll get caught with a student like me. I probably create the biggest contrast on the planet.
"Yeah, Nic, princesses shouldn't swear," Cody jokes.
"Don't make me kick your ass," I threaten him.
"Alright, that's it," Kat claps her hands once, "Nic, go change so we can get out of here."659Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwGsfJMvR6s
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I get out of the dress and into paradise. Back into my jeans and studded denim jacket, I feel more like a queen than a princess.
Morgan tells me that the Julliard director would like to have an official meeting with me, and I was thrilled. Julliard has always been my dream, but I never thought I'll have a chance at it. Julliard has also been my sister's dream once, and she almost fulfilled it. She was just so close to it, but shit happens, and one can never fully reach all his goals.
Nevertheless, to be able to meet the director is amazing all by itself although I'm not exactly into acting. I want music. I love music. I want to make music. So I told Morgan that I'll be willing to talk to him anytime, but I didn't tell her that my plans are different than her expectations. This is an opportunity that I'll never get again.
Looks like I might thank Jordan for this one day.
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