I sighed. “What am I doing wrong?”
“Try pulling harder. Like you’re angry and want to kill something,” he suggested. I put down the bow and turned to him. “Not me, something else.”
“Fine.” I pulled the arrow back farther, winked one eye and let go. I hit the target on the outside of the circle. I smiled and so did William. I wasn’t sure why he was smiling. I was thinking of him when I pulled back.
“Good job,” he smiled.
I grabbed another arrow and did the same thing. I hit the outside of the circle again and again. The next time I did miss, but that was the last time. I barely hit the outside of the target.
I winked and eyed the circle in the middle. I breathed in and out. I then let go of the arrow. It seemed to go in slow motion. William clapped his hands.
I almost, just almost got the red, just an inch, really. I smiled. Maybe I was actually good at something besides reading about other people’s lives, pretending to be someone awesome online, and meowing at every cat I see. Maybe I had a real gift, a talent maybe.
“Well done,” he said. “Want to try again?”
I nodded. “Yeah, this is actually fun.”
“You have the gift of a hunter,” he told me.
I looked at him and shook my head. “I don’t want to hurt another living thing.”
“Why?” he asked.
“What if I killed you and ate you? How would you feel about that?”
He looked puzzled, almost shocked that I had said something so morbid, so canny. I was too. “Well, I would let you if there was no other food, and you were starving to death.”
“That’s gross, William!” I shook my head and made a face.
His voice rose a little higher than I thought it would be, making me jump. “How?”
I was in shock as to why he would ask that, “How? Wait, what? Are you series? I’m not going to eat you! You’re a human being and what would that make me?”
“Tavi, there is nothing wrong with wanting to live.”
“There is something wrong with living a bad life, an unhappy life, a life that isn’t fulfilling. I couldn’t wake up every day and see myself in the mirror,” I said looking away. He was silent.
As the air was clam and the sky was clear, I raised my arrow quickly and let go. I hit the target in the center, straight on. I smiled. Then he opened his mouth and ruined my happy moment. “It’s too bad. You could really help me hunt.”
“No thanks,” I said looking away, remembering the deer’s face as she had died.
“It’s lunch time,” he said taking away the bow. I didn’t want to let go, but he made me. He placed it in his shed and I walked back into the house. I undressed to my pants and sweater. I braided my hair and lay on my bed.
My family could not find me, not until my friend called them. There was not a 100% chance that she did have the number. She could have lost it, or worst, just forgot.
Forgot about me.
Forgot about our kiss.
“Tavi,” William called out.
I came into the kitchen. He had warm plates waiting on the table. I took my seat and raised a high eyebrow. “What is it?”
“Our lunch,” he said.
“I’m not eating it until you tell me what it is,” I argued.
“It’s deer meat.”
I eyed it closer. “Doesn’t look like it.”
“Well, it is. Just eat, ok?”
I nodded, sat down, and started to nibble on lunch. “This meat taste funny.” I wanted to change the subject, get my mind off of the meal. “Since your wife, have you done anything with any other woman? Like have another girlfriend, or got married?”
He thought about it for a minute. “No, I guess not. Dated maybe once or twice, but really, there hasn’t been anything. I didn’t even want to try.”
“Why?” I asked. “I don’t want details or anything, but didn’t you even try to date after your wife?"
“You were something I thought about a lot and is it fair to bring someone else into my world of problems?” I gave him a look. “Don’t answer that.”
“No, it’s not fair.”
He didn’t reply, and instead ate his lunch too.
No one has come to the cabin. It’s been two weeks I think. It wasn’t a normal two weeks really because I’ve been waiting and waiting for someone to come and get me.
The first day, I was so hopeful.
The second day of waiting, I stayed up, listening to the door. No noise.
The third day, I paced around. I practiced the bow with William, with him hovering over me.
The fourth day, I started to panic. When I took a shower, I cried and almost broke down.
The sixth day, I cried in bed all day, with William trying to calm me not knowing what in the world was wrong.
The tenth day, I didn’t talk. The fourteenth day, I gave up on hope. That was when I told myself if God was real, he sure hated me, or that I had done something so bad in another life to get this type of punishment.
After a while, I just told myself to give in. It would make life easier.
ns 15.158.61.54da2
