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Pulling up outside Beechwood high, my stomach was churning for no god damn reason, well, there was one reason well three actually.
Lexi, Tom, peroxide blonde, I giggle at the thought of the last name, She's had that name since I started at this school two years ago, I think she has a cheek to call me lard ass or bufforilla, yes, that's right, this girl who looks like she's sticks her head in a bowl of bleach and sits in the sun for hours on end bullies me, she has from day one I have a numerous amount of scars on my body with her name on it she was the main reason I use to cut.
I use to visualize her running down the high street her hair in flames from so much bleach the combustion exploding in front of me there would be no point her thinking I would help I wouldn't piss on her even if someone paid me in custard creams, that's just how much I hate her because I'm definitely love a custard cream.
Then there's Tom, the biggest knob head I've ever seen in all my life, a total jock, mr I will pay you to be my friend, I say he's a knob head, but I use to have a major crush on him, it was going so well too till peroxide caught me peeking on him in the shower one day in school, she went and told him and now I've grown 2 heads because he now treats me like a freak show ughhh.
Then comes Lexi, this one has a malfunction somewhere, I mean hell she makes Hitler look like a saint, she chats so much bollox that she can say one thing to one person making it go viral within an hour, she even tried to spread a rumour about me once. I became famous for a whole day, it was great, till people started realising I really wasn't that cool.
That's right Im a loner, hiding in shadows, skipping class, sitting on the top of the hill looking down on everyone else being complete twatts, wishing I could act like a twatt aswell, my most favourite and safe place right now though is sitting on the field watching Ty chasing a ball.
I use to hate myself so much that I would hurt myself because I believed it was my fault people hated me even my own family, till mum walked in one day seeing all my cuts, yes she went mad, yes, she stopped me from going out, but where the bloody hell was I going to go when I was 14 stone with no friends.
I knew she had just had enough, she called it attention seeking but I couldnt help myself I wanted my bullies and my self hatred to stop, I was bloody mad if I thought it would ever stop.
I use to have a friend, her name was Faye we were close well, I thought we were until I got hold of her diary one day, she was sleeping over at mine, she went for a bath, she was in there for flipping ages I was getting bored.
I saw a book poking out of her bag so I got a little nosey, she was in my room so I had every right, there it was in black and white, "She's so thick and stupid, she thinks that we are friends but the only reason I hang with the tard is for the ultimate dreamboat who is her brother, he makes me drool! God damn it can you imagine if we actually did it, I think I'd need a bib." I chucked it across the room in disgust,Omfg you sicko I thought.
The amount of crap I read in this diary you can imagine how much profanity was coming out my gob, I was literally vomiting in my own mouth, she would be chewing on my fist if I hadn't already been cautioned by my mother.
How I wanted topull back Faye's mouth and shit down her neck, but nooooo! Reagan had to be a good girl, no profanity tonight.
No one could hear the amounts of f$$k you Faye's, I'm going to kick her pretty little ass into next week, if I say it in my head right?.
When she got out the bath I chucked her bag at her telling her where to go, I never saw her again who needs friends like that, I sure as hell didn't.
The door swings open snapping me out of my thoughts, Ty standing there like some greek god holding his hand out for me.
"Are you getting out this car or have I got to peel your pretty little ass of my leather seats myself," I looked over at my brother rolling my eyes.
"Same shit, different day" he laughed. Ty looked at me wiggling his eyebrows.
"You know Reagan your top notch, don't let anyone tell you different now get out!" I punched him in the side as he pulled me up winding him, he laughed. "See you at lunch?" I nodded. "I'll be training princess but you can come watch," I nodded in agreement. "No problems dickbrain see you then," Slamming his rusty door shut we walked in two different directons, I walked through the doors as the last bell rang.
I only managed to walk about 50 metres when peroxide jumped out at me, woah that white hair shit the life out of me, I had to breath damn this girl I thought.
"What do you want peroxide? I haven't got time for your shit today," she giggled, let me rephrase it well it was more of a screech like a damn hyena what was her problem it's like this girl eats helium for breakfast.
I could'nt help but giggle coughing to cover it up.
She looked like a grown ass woman with big ta tas, a big gob, until she opened her mouth.
She looked at me weird, "Me and Lexi was just saying you look different today," I rolled my eyes, I've heard this one before but I thought I'd play my part in it. "Oh, is this the part I say, really why's that then," she nodded.
"Go on then I ain't got all day," she laughed again "Because you look like you had surgery and without realizing they attached a hippo's ass to your's" even though these things they say do hurt I never let them see it, never let them bring me down again I made a promise.
I start clapping and smiling at peroxide, "Wow who you getting your new scripts from, thank him for me won't ya, cause finally, you made me laugh," she got a bit pissed.
I let out a sharp breath as her fist connected with my stomach again, "You weren't meant to laugh," she scowled at me as she started closing the gap between us I could smell the vile cigarettes on her breath I took in a deep breath as she retracted her arm back to punch me again, but it never came.
"Oi peroxide, get your std hands off my sister or so help me god I will tell the whole team what you got up to at the weekend now piss off!" Peroxide gasped whatever it was bad she quickly let go of me and darted away.
I crouched down holding my stomach watching my brother walking through the doors with his mates, they were all rushing up to me, I had to wipe my mouth before I dribbled all over the floor, they were some of the fittest guys I'd ever seen.
"You ok princess?" Ty lifted my top looking at the now red mark on my belly I quickly tugged it back down but nodded at him.
"Yeah, I can handle it," I retorted he chuckled. "You're a right little hard nut ain't you sis, ok see you at lunch" and he was gone, I turned round to look at some of the finest ass in school and my brother was the head jock of them all.
Instead of going to class I headed straight for the bog.
I had English first, I wasn't going to miss anything important, next lesson was a free period, so I was good for two hours, in all honesty, the bog had become my sanctuary, my sacred place.
The one place I wasn't judged also safe from the abuse.
I gathered my thoughts in this cubicle, my thoughts weren't pretty, to say the least, but it always ended with the same thought we are all the same.
We really ain't no different, so just because someone has one freckle bigger than the other, one ass cheeks bigger,one bingo wing hangs lower than the other that makes us freaks? Well if that's the case, I'm one sassy freak furthermore I'm proud to be one.
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