I pick up my spear and put it in my shoe andmcontinue walking. We get to the river and I remain silent as I can feel him staring at me, eyes burning in the back of my head. "You still never answered" he demands impatiently. I turn around and look at him " I went to get water and got lost ok" I say aburtly, slightly embarrassed. He glances at my hands then looks unplease at me. "You weren't comming back were you, there was no bringing back water" he accuses. I look away "tell me what is going on, why does Josphine have bounty on your head, what happend in that cave Lindsey!? he presses raising his voice and taking a step closer. Anger builds up in me as he pushes for answers I try to remain calm but it's been a bad night.

 "You really want to know why, because after they held me hostage for days and poisoned Sam, they tortured me, they beat me, first with her spiked belt or a piece of wood hoping I'd give up, and at that point if it wasn't for saving Sam I would of but I can't believe I did what I did, I attacked one of the women when she came back to check on me, I stole her spear and I cut off her arm and then broke her bones and left her there, then I held a knife to another's womens throat and cut her leaving her there to bleed,... I went and got Sam and dragged him to camp, are you satisfied now" I snap aggressively yet struggle to get the words out slightly stuttering. Tears now burn my eyes he stares at me with a dreaded look on his face as he remains silent, not knowing what to say. "I didn't even think twice, all I could think is what they did to me, and Sam I wanted it to stop. I can't go back and face the people I vowed to protect, knowing I did something so barbaric, if people would know what I did there would think I'm a monster!" I declare raisig my voice disgusted with myself looking down as my sobs become more violent as my hands begin to shake.

His expression becomes sympthectic now and he comes closer until he's inches away and puts his hands on my shoulders firmly. "Look at me, your not like them, what you did- wasn't out of vengeance, it was out of fear, you did it instinctively for yours and Sams life, you did it because you give a damn, you have to come back... those people need you, your brother needs you, Sam needs you, they are both stuffering and I have no idea how to fix them, if you leave! Because your the one who inspires them" he announces thickly but laced with desperation. I look into his dark brown eyes looking through me. I'm Stunned for what I see, at this moment Isn't a heartless jerk who makes it his mission to make my life harder and get on my last nerve, I see fear and a someone who seeks understanding just like anyone eles. My hands stills and my breathing steadys but my heart skips a beat. Suddenly I don't feel so alone I realise I'm not the only one scared and don't have all the answers.