尋死的念頭一出現，我就被自己給嚇到了。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKblLLmg9G7
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoOfrrMGSHM
「妳瘋了嗎？」468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxW8fcBtwQ1
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ60QVFHPdsd
腦裡出現兩個我，理性的那個正在發飆，狠狠咒罵另一個我。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfZ7roXE6Ca
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVNtciQHTYm
而被罵的那個我，只是一個勁兒地哭。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3ko6i5gvxQ
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡThsMg8s5j2
我覺得自己隨時都會爆炸、衝動行事，便躲進被窩，用厚厚的被子蓋住全身，連頭都包在棉被裡，不讓任何光線進來。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAjh9zObneV
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoGIhlwXgDM
在充滿二氧化碳的被窩裡，我全身是汗，滿臉淚水。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqDHWlka0Yr
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡby4UTj9DQ0
我側身把臉埋進枕頭，把尖叫送進布料與棉花裡。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡF77JF8QFbu
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3Kevx1pPuo
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsCuYqvfqoq
我往自己的腳下看，有一片草原。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9GKtZ0EHVm
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4CoPFzZIe6
面前有一條石頭道路，盡頭是顆大樹。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrdXNilVqXS
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6egVL32O1Y
樹下站著一個人，太遠了，我看不清他的臉。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiSub6EJ00e
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7tx4MrZGhp
所以我走近，愈走愈近，直到我看清楚他是誰。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVGMTKsikD0
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9ufj0tKcjI
站在樹下的人是英傑。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIVXzVHRdmv
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUT9HltU9tf
我跑向他，勾住他的手。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlqQnsCsv1e
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡefWzMm3wmF
他對我笑著，什麼話也沒說。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7gmpNwJrvN
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoxq9caGScR
我像是要把這些日子以來，所有發生的事情都告訴他，開始滔滔不絕地講。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQIgjifExMn
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVkLJXue5hx
他陪著我走到我原本站的地方，就停下來。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGz6pHioFUA
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwgIgXDemkW
我還在講，他轉頭看我，伸出手揉了我的頭，就像他每次做的那樣。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnECBEmzCrx
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLRWaiKJwFd
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG8xhcfO0Z3
我張開眼睛，才知道自己夢見英傑了。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpxEnMnPiKK
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡos31NBxmdT
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPk7cxvLbiL
我開始懷疑起自己做這個夢的原因。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFCw2OvYcRD
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhNJniP57BK
是太想念英傑了，還是壓力太大需要出口？468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnNsKkm9nJ6
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ99JbwDrUhs
或是…他真的怎麼了，才到我夢裡來？468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgyvc1Sm3rm
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwWKJ3TtDiB
我心裡很害怕是後者，但我知道此時的自己無法找到真正的解答。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡliEoiVFU7l
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡT0pEXC59VJ
這個夢緩解了我的情緒，也瞬間恢復了大部分的理智。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzui4WGxhO7
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZdvB1blCBO
不管是什麼原因，都是英傑救了我。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0LA8Me8hSd
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7A8S8OmBv3
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡScwbLDOFi7
我度過了心中的那個坎，日子雖然沒有改變，但我的心態改變了。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNnPwM7UrTJ
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG9pHhB2dVl
「沒錯，都是我選的。所以，我要更努力才行。」468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7E5jxvyqLR
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpuDvKL5pa1
雖然，從那個時候開始，過了很長一段借貸的日子。人都說救急不救窮，但我很幸運，擁有很多好朋友，如果我開口，他們總是不說二話的就拿錢給我；就算我死愛面子不開口，他們也會一直逼問是不是沒錢用。我拿著跟朋友借來的錢，繳家裡的房租、水電費、瓦斯費…然後在假日另外打零工還錢。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2AIA8wuAKL
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ96zF4m6bBK
高中的最後一個學期，我也差點因為沒能繳出學費而休學（當時已有就學貸款，但沒有考慮，只想著沒錢就去賺錢，別念書好了），但我那班不知該說是兄弟還是恩人的同學，硬是把一疊鈔票交到我手裡，要我慢慢還，要我和他們一起畢業。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQw11QOEFa3
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsxBP0bdLBt
我沒參加考試，畢業後直接去找了工作。我還清了錢，卻欠了好多人情債。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnbqqbjCga0
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSObIAlpdWb
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqdte8KoQKB
生活條件穩定之後，也談了戀愛，生活圈的人換了幾輪，越來越趨於穩定。
只是在我心底仍有一個空蕩的角落。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9vDsk5htHS
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWXkr7ztIqh
我還是沒有更換手機號碼，一直抱著小小的希望，468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡENBNR4efGn
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHBBhzR3wSl
可我已在心裡默默地接受「英傑可能已經過世了」的事實。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoKUUzt96ur
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡylZqRJBud5
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMp1lK9Goh4
某天，我的皮夾不知在哪兒掉了，找也找不到。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIYngQafkcj
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuU1nmFPNKz
我辦了卡片掛失，心裡希望有人撿到皮夾，會願意送還給我。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW5zdhraRgB
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbgn1AEOesN
這時，我才想起皮夾裡有英傑的照片，也想起我們說好要另外拍照留存的事。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡl9CuBZN07X
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8a0qA20NyE
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhMxP1gMEr5
我的皮夾沒回來，英傑唯一的照片也這麼沒了。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQcIcWwJaJl
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEJaCr915Ce
有時候，我會懷疑自己已經忘記他的長相，便努力回想那段日子，但畫面只是越來越模糊。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbk2aKUgDtV
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX7dFkYeuDa
一年、兩年、三年，當我漸漸淡忘這段過去的時候，我卻看見他了。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAxn6jMWHBe
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJbP5ByA5QD
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhkaQbfkOnn
在電視裡面。468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTYOPGluAyz
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbK4oxP5Mlq
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7HXRSW0kxH
468Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8vHZH034LG
待續。
ns 15.158.61.12da2
