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_Sutato _
... How does one turn against a person so quickly when they have just met them? People would tell me that this person has extreme trust issues or ... just paranoid in general that everyone and everything is against them. Even the world itself. But ... what if they were treated by someone and still turn against them anyway--- even if that person hasn't done anything wrong to them? Is it still a trust issue thing or ... paranoia? Maybe even both.
That question is still lingering in my mind when Purity decided to ... go against me for no reason at all. Philia keeps telling me that what she did was wrong and that she was a horrible person for doing it. However ... I can't help but feel sorry about her situation.
She fled from the humans when they attacked her group, attacked one of the rabbits out of fear, and ... well ... I think that's it. But ... what gave her the idea to try and take my stuff? I don't understand what she could get out of this. I shook my head, flipping a fresh new page in my journal to write what has happened in the last few days after Purity and her friend's banishment.
The rabolks here are beginning to dislike the feaolks even though one of them is among us. But they don't even count him because, to their knowledge, he doesn't behave like the rest of his race. My opinion on it ... I have no words in saying what race dislikes who since I have no clue what I am. Or ... that I don't dislike any race out there at all.
Eh, I won't write much about that topic since it's something I don't understand all the way.
The rabolks mentioned one of her friends: a lioness. Most of them were terrified of the lioness while others were curious about the creature. I am one of those people too! I would like to meet this lioness and why they decided to go back to Purity and her ... ice friend. But that's not the only reason--- the second reason of mine is ... the rumors that the rabolks have been spreading. They spoke of the lioness having flames on her back.
I was shocked to discover this from Bambi and the others. My first question was: How was the lioness not hurting from the flames? And then the second was: Where are those flames coming from?
I know there are people out in the world who can cast fire spells and all of that--- quite similar to the books I've read--- Never mind about that! But how is she doing it all the time? Maybe it activates whenever she cast a fire spell. Yeah, that seems like the logical point here.
I believe those two are the only thing that is talked about the most around here- since it's recently new to the gigantic rabolk population underground. Any other day is the same old stuff. However, because it feels like the old days before the incident happened, something feels wrong.
... What about that other feaolk? Did he left too outside of the Vined Forest? I have never seen him in these last few days actually. I won't assume if he went after his sister or the group he was once in. If he did fly away on his own, then, I hope he finds good in his path.
"Sutato!" I lifted my head up from my journal and over to the entrance of my shack. The sunlight sparkled outside as a hand waved in view of it. I raised my brows, recognizing the voice immediately. I turned back to my journal, flipping a page and placing my writing tool in it. I closed it and stood up, walking over to the entrance. I squinted my eyes from the blinding light as I could see clearly the next second.
I glanced around at the scenery before turning over to the rabolk humanoid who was ... wearing some leaf clothing. I narrowed my eyes before confusion spread across my face, "Oh this?" Paradise asked, displaying a wide smile. "Well, I thought of the adventure that I wanted to do and ... well, I can't venture out if I'm not wearing ... whatever "clothes" are."
I slowly nodded, smiling a bit before they check their leaf shirt and pants. The two looked like they were about to fall apart but not really at the same time. It's ... a good start towards clothing...
"It's ... alright ... right? I did try my best to mimic how clothes are ... but they're difficult to form with nature!" They spoke, squeezing their hands together into fists by their face.
I slowly tilted my head, wondering if they ever took a look at clothing. If they didn't, they should have used that as a reference. They let out a sigh and put their arms down by their sides, turning towards me, "What do you think I should do? Should I keep this or improve on it? One finger for keep, two fingers for---" They stopped talking when I held up two fingers. They drooped their ears before nodding, perking them up. "Alright! That's okay! It is a work in process... I'm totally not leaving yet."
I shook my head, "... What?" They frowned at me as I walked over to them. I shrugged before opening up my journal and halting my footing. I drew something in it before showing it to them. It was a drawing of a stick figure with rabbit ears standing next to an arrow that is pointing to a happy smile with a question mark. Paradise tilted their head before gasping in realization, "OH Y--- Yes, yes, I'm doing good! I'm surprised you didn't write out a sentence this time around. I was so prepared to read it!"
I stared at them, remembering the time they failed to read the sentence and had to call one of the rabolks to read it out to them. I slowly nodded, giving an "I don't believe it" look. "I was!" They huffed, drooping their ears. "I actually asked some of my kind to teach me some of the words so I can read what you say in your book! I really did, Sutato!" They whined at the end of their statement.
I raised my brows, turning to my journal to write out a sentence before showing it to them, "Do you know what happened to our new friend a few days ago?"
They stared at the journal for a moment, frozen as they looked like they were struggling to read what I wrote. I narrowed my eyes as I watch them smile nervously and look up at me, "... I ... I thought I only need to learn the word once and I'll have the knowledge in my head--- turns out I'm wrong."
I gave them a look as they huffed, "I'm sorry! I thought learning to read was like that!"
I shook my head, turning my journal to me as I drew while they talked, "I'll relearn the words I ask--- though I forgot about them so ... I guess I need to learn more- Does that mean I have to actually learn to read to go on my adventure?"
I nodded my head to their question. "Awe, so much work I have to do." They whined. If you want to go on an adventure, you might as well learn to read in case you need to read directions. Soon I was finished and I showed them the drawing I did. It was a stick figure with feather wings this time. "OH! About him..." They droop their ears with a frown displaying on their face. "... Something is ... wrong with him. He won't eat."
I widened my eyes, staring at them with concern. ... The feaolk isn't eating...? Why? Shouldn't he eat to get stronger and fly off somewhere he wants to be? ... Now that I think about it ... I don't know much about the guy. I narrowed my eyes, becoming serious as my wings grew larger. "I take it you want to go see him?"
I nodded my head with determination on my face. I want to know why he's not eating. I thought he ate after I asked him that day but I didn't realize we were facing a serious matter. I blinked in realization, turning to draw in my journal real quick before showing it to them: it was a basket full of fruit. "Yeah." They nodded, glancing up at me. "We can collect some fruits but ... I'd thought it'll work since he refuses--- HEY!"
I was already getting out one of the baskets from my shack when Paradise shouted. I headed out and over to the trees, closing and shrinking my wings back up. "Wait for me!" They called, catching up to me with their nature-made basket. "You're really determined about this, I'll be too if I knew what was going on with him."
I tilted my head, halting when they started to touch a tree and turn it into an apple tree. Apples began growing at a fast rate as I widened my eyes in awe. "I was always checking up on him every day--- scratch that--- every morning, every afternoon, and every night when he kept on saying he wasn't hungry. We both know we need to eat every once in a while but I've been told by the librarians down below that certain folks don't require as much food as they usually would. Our feaolk might be one of those folks but we don't know for certain."
Vines grew out of the branches as they grabbed onto the apples: half of them went to Paradise while the other half was given to me. They allowed me to grab each apple off of the vines and put them in my basket. I slowly nodded at what Paradise said, frowning slightly. I have a bad feeling that they're suffering from something that caused them pain ... maybe ... just like how I am with ... my past experiences. We could ask about how he was with his group ... but ... hearing about it the other day- that night when Purity was exiled, I think they're on bad terms.
I glanced down at the apple in my hand, tilting my head. I turned towards Paradise who was finished up and looked at me. I ... could just ... open my mouth and ask them ... but ... it seems scary. I know they won't judge ... it's ... just hard to talk. I placed the apple in my basket and grip the handle tightly, feeling very anxious about talking. "... What do you want to ask, Sutato?" I looked up at them confused. "Is it still about the feaolk?"
I nodded my head, feeling the anxiousness drift away slowly. "... Don't worry ... I ... I hope it's not anything serious affecting him inside--- you know?" They smiled nervously before turning and leading the way, "Come on."
That's ... I frowned before walking forward quickly and grabbing their shoulder. They turned towards me as I pointed at my head. "... Mentally?" They questioned. "Or is ... it ... inside their brain?"
I held up one finger as they looked confused, "How ... I- I'm sorry, I don't understand how something can affect someone mentally."
I frowned deeply as I grip the handle tightly. They widened their eyes as the realization came to their face, "OH. YOU--- oh. I thought you meant something actually damaged their brain and affected them mentally. I .. didn't realize you meant it without damaging their brain."
Paradise. Both ways will damage the person mentally ... I think. I think that's how it is with me. I feel like there's something within my brain that's damaged that isn't allowing me to talk. I slowly nodded as they nodded, "Alrighty then. We have a lead on that part then if your guess is true." They turned and continued walking as I followed behind.
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...
"Greetings Paradise, Sutato!" A couple of rabbits bounced up and down on their tall plant platforms. I gave them a smile before turning my head over at the cave entrance. A taller plant platform was stationed in front of it with a larger rabbit on it, making me assume Philia is there. She had her head lowered to the rabbits below her, but her ears were drooped, making me assume there was something wrong.
"Hi M- Leader." Paradise greeted and I nudged their arm with mine, giving them a look. I know she's your mother, you don't have to hide it anymore. As if they read my mind, they gave me a glare. "It's improper for me--- as one of the shamans, to address the leader as such."
"You don't have to do that anymore, Paradise. Everyone knows how much you try to not call me your mother." Philia spoke, lifting her head up to us.
Paradise droops their ears, "But as---"
"You don't need to be proper anymore, dear." Philia interrupted her, "But you do have a patient you do need to heal, Paradise."
I turned towards them, narrowing my eyes. Unless it's the feaolk, otherwise you better not be avoiding your duties to visit me. Paradise frowned deeply, "... There's no sign of illness he has, Philia. He's not affected by a disease."
"You're willing to give up on Castit?"
"No!" They shook their head, "I won't give up on him, I just need more ... ways to try and cure what's wrong with him, it's not contagious!"
"... Don't try to stall on this ... it may have a bad look on you, my child," Philia warned them, turning towards me. "How are you doing, Sutato? Helping them?"
I nodded before pointing at the cave and back to her with a determined look. Philia chuckled lightly, "Alright, I'll leave you two be. Good luck."
Paradise nodded before leading me into the cave. They went in first before I squeeze my way in. They halted by a chamber as I walked in front of the entrance, getting pulled to the side by them. I blinked in confusion, turning towards them. "I hope you realize doing that may scare our patients." They whispered to me.
... I narrowed my eyes and nodded slowly, holding the basket's handle tightly. I turned towards the chamber, looking inside as it was dark. I tilted my head in confusion about the lighting, "Oh ... Castit wanted it to be dark in there ... I don't know why." They whispered.
Why? I slowly walked back to the entrance, ignoring Paradise's warnings and squinting my eyes through the darkness. Soon I could see what lies within it. Castit was in there, on a blanket of moss with some feathers all spread out around him. I looked confused before spotting one of his wings messed up with missing feathers. And soon I realized what he was doing. I widened my eyes in alarm, walking in without thinking.
"Sutato!" I heard Paradise shout in a whisper. "ugh..."
I watched him as he didn't even seem to notice me at all, it was as if he was in his own little world. I frowned and approached carefully, sitting down next to him. I set the basket down as I flinched at him snapping his head at me. He stared at me with wide eyes before turning over at the entrance, "... Is it time to be checked again?" He asked with an irritated tone.
"... N-No ... we ... we just brought apples here for you," Paradise said, sounding hurt.
"... Well that was worthless-."
"No."
The room fell silence as Castit slowly turned his head over at me, continuing his wide eyes as I was glaring at him. I didn't realize at the time that I spoke for the first time and I only thought that the word I spoke was in my head. I grabbed an apple and handed him it, keeping my eyes stern. He stared down at it and looked up at me, "... I ... don't---"
"Please eat ... you're making all of us worry about you, Castit." Paradise voiced in, walking into the chamber.
He turned to glare at them as I heard them squeal. I tilted my head, turning over to them as I gesture for them to get out. They frowned at me before sighing and nodding their head. They turned and walked out, disappearing from our sight. I turned back at him as he did the same to me. "... Am I worrying you?"
I frowned slightly, nodding my head slowly while still having the apple in my hand for him to take. I opened my mouth to try and speak to encourage him but I just shut my mouth, frowning at the sight as nervousness trailed up my spine.
He tilted his head slowly, asking, "... Have you not ... spoken before...?" quietly, while raising his brows.
I shook my head, placing the apple down before digging out the journal I buried with the other apples. I opened it up and grabbed my pencil, writing down what I want to say before showing it to him, "When I speak, I get all nervous and anxious, it's like an extreme form of anxiety I have. Just thinking about it, makes me feel scared. I have before but that is a long time ago."
"... Oh ..." He slowly nodded, "... Wouldn't you be comfortable talking with the rabbits instead of me?"
I shrugged with a frown. I don't know why that is a problem with me, I don't want to think about it. I wrote down what I thought before showing it to him.
"Okay." He slowly nodded before looking down at the apple. He sighed quietly before picking it up, "... I never had an apple for a while ... I mainly ate meat and while that did get me sick several times ... it's nice to be offered this. But there are also other times where I would get sick for no reason at all." He took a bite out of it afterwards.
I tilted my head, pointing at him with my pencil. I watched him chew and shallow the piece before he spoke once more, "... I felt like ... my old group was stuffing me with food even though ... they weren't. We usually ate mornings and nights- sometimes afternoons. And when all three happens, I got sick and ... well, threw up. Even when it was just mornings and nights, I would still get sick."
I poked myself with my pencil, thinking quietly. Do feaolks only need to eat once a week or ... twice a week since they fly around a lot? Maybe every other four days. I slowly nodded, becoming interested in learning about this species--- or ... race in this case. Maybe even ... "folk" but ... I feel uncomfortable saying it like that so ... race it is!
I glanced back at Castit who stared at me with a wary look, "... What are you thinking about?"
I wrote down what I thought, showing him it as he reacted differently than I imagined, "I didn't mean to write down all of your thoughts!" I gave him a look. Which one is it? It's better if I don't keep secrets. "... ugh ... maybe I should have specified it but I'm too lazy to do so." He continued, shrugging.
I wrote down another sentence, showing it to him, "You looked wary so I didn't want to hide anything from you."
He tilted his head before straightening it, "... I didn't seem you untrustworthy if you were thinking about that. It was ...--- let's put it like this: People usually say this to people who they are close with--- sort of if they were plotting something evilly but playfully in a way."
I slowly tilted my head, becoming puzzled to the core. He frowned at my expression, asking, "... I'm not making any sense, am I?"
I nodded my head. I never heard of people doing that, why do they do that?
"... You were to me." I heard Paradise's voice in as I turned to glare at them. "Hey! I'm the shaman here! I should be in here instead of you."
"Guess he's a better shaman than you," Castit said. I turned to glare at him as he stared back at me with confusion. "... You know I don't mean it."
"At least you're not annoyed anymore." Paradise sighed in relief. "But ... I do take that to heart though."
"Don't please." Castit turned to them quickly. "I-"
"I'm not like the rest of the shamans in the colony. I only became one because I wanted to heal people, not ... the other requirements of being one." They said, sitting down next to me.
"... So ... a healer?" He guessed, raising a brow.
"... Yeah ... just a healer." They nodded their head. "Also, you need to learn to not take jokes seriously, Sutato." They turned their head at me, shooting me a glare.
I tilted my head, confused at the word. "... I assume he doesn't know what "joke" is." Castit guessed correctly.
They frowned, "... Yeah, that ... explains it." They slowly nodded before clearing their throat, "A joke is like you're trying to make someone laugh. There are many different types of jokes since ... some of them can be nice or friendly in a way while the other half can be mean or dark."
"Depending ... on the person if they deem them as mean, friendly or dark." Castit filled in.
"Yeah, that too." They nodded.
I slowly nodded, turning back to him. I still see it as an insult than a joke. Was it a mean one? Because if it was one, then it was a horrible one. I turned to the apple he had in his hand as I watched him glance at it before looking back up at me with a look, "... You want me to finish this, don't you?"
"Well duh. Both of us want you to eat." Paradise glared at him.
"... I don't understand why you guys want to help me when I don't have anyone left but myself. Isn't it ... fine if I just disappear so that you don't have to deal with me anymore?" He asked.
I frowned, gripping my pencil tightly. It was a mental thing ...- "... No ..." Paradise said, widening their eyes as they slowly shook their head. "Why would I think like that about you? None of us do."
"... It feels natural for ... me for folks to ... think like that around me." He slowly answered, avoiding our gazes.
I wrote in my journal, showing it to him after I held a finger up to Paradise. It read; "You're not with your group anymore. You don't need to picture us like them. We will never become like how they treated you as such."
He softened his look as he closed his eyes, "... Sometimes it's tough to break through the cycle of thinking someone might be the exact same people you've been through for almost your entire life. At least that is what it is like for me."
Paradise frowned before perking up, "Well! I'm sure my kind would love to see you out of this dusty, old cave. Each of them has wonderful personalities that wouldn't dare to be like the mean ones you had in your life."
"... I ... don't want to befriend every one of them..." He said quietly, opening his eyes as he glanced up at them.
"You already have!" They smiled at him. "They already like you."
"Some of them do." He spoke, confusing me for a moment because I have never seen a rabolk be mean to him.
Paradise drooped their ears slightly, frowning slightly as well, "But there are some who like you, Castit. Don't focus on the negative parts of those who do not like you, focus on the ones who do. Because those will be very accepting of you and ... supportive." At the end of their statement, they had a smile on their face.
I nodded in agreement, giving him a soft smile. Finding friends who will be there for you until the very end is tough and can be challenging, but once you find them on accident or purpose, you might have a good life with their support in your hands.
Castit slowly nodded, glancing down at the apple before taking another bite of it. I smiled warmly as I pulled my wings close to me, feeling the happiness rise within me. Paradise was the same way as they spoke once more, "Once you are done, meet us outside of the cave." They told him before getting up and turning towards me. "Come on, let's leave him alone."
I frowned, disagreeing with the idea. "Don't worry, Sutato. I'll be fine. I'll ... finish maybe two or three apples--- if that's fine with you guys." He told me as I slowly nodded. I closed my journal with my pencil in place before getting up to my feet. I eyed the feathers all around him as a small part of me still didn't trust him to be by himself. I sighed and followed Paradise out of the chamber.
"He'll be fine and I told him he must meet us outside of the cave." They told me, walking over to the cave entrance as I stood my position in front of the chamber's entrance. I frowned slightly, slowly following behind. I ... hope so.
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...
"Why are you invisible, Sut?" A small rabbit was sitting on my wing as I was lying down. I turned to them, being invisible as they continued. "... You don't have to be shy." I was near the bushes, in sight of the cave as the group of rabbits were still in front of the entrance. I rested my head on my arms, keeping quiet to pretend I wasn't there. I was still worried about Castit, thinking if he went back to picking out his feathers. I asked Paradise earlier if they noticed it but they never did and thought the feathers were new placements when the rabbits brought them in.
... I didn't tell them who they belonged to since they were needed somewhere else. I watched the small rabbit hop off of my wing before hopping and slamming down face-first onto the ground, "... I thought your head was here!" They squeaked, sitting back up and turned around. "... Did you leave...?" They drooped their ears as I frowned. I closed my wings back up as I watched the small rabbit lower their head before sadly hopping back to the group.
"Oh!" I looked confused at the rabbit's voice, lifting my head up when it jumped into mid-air. "The feaolk finally came out! ... If only Sut saw this."
I didn't see it because the cave was not on the same ground level as I was. It was down a slope to the right of me. I slowly nodded, feeling a smile appear on my face. That is good. I slowly got up to my feet, leaving my journal behind as I walked forward, glancing down at the rabbits gathering around the feaolk.
Castit was looking down at all of them as he looked uncomfortable. I frowned before watching them all back away from them. I tilted my head and padded forward quietly, still invisible to the naked eye. "Give him some room, my people!" I heard Philia say, telling rabbits off.
"... You didn't need to do that-"
"Take it for granted. I am so glad you are starting to come out of the cave now." Philia interrupted him, drooping her ears. She was sitting on a large leaf platform as it was standing tall as ever. About the height to our shoulders.
He frowned slightly before dropping it and nodding his head, "... I made everyone worry ... didn't I?"
"... we were mixed with worry and concern, so yes. We were worried about you." She answered, nodding her head.
"... Sorry."
"No need to apologize." She shook her head. "As long as you are feeling better, we will feel happy about your recovery."
He sighed quietly, nodding his head before turning over to me. I blinked at him as Philia did the same, but she was confused as to why he was staring at me. Why is he ...- Wait ... does he knows I'm here while being invisible? "... Do you ever get invisible people here?" He asked, glancing back at Philia.
"... No ... we don't." Philia looked alarmed, glancing back and forth from me to Castit.
"Sut goes invisible whenever he wants to!" That same small rabbit from before jumped on Philia's platform, telling them that. "... Sometimes ... he doesn't reveal himself that he's ... there. I feel like he's trying to play a hiding game but ... at the same time ... I feel like he's completely trying to hide from us without actually playing."
"This day is one of those days where he is invisible." They finished.
"... He can turn invisible?" Castit asked, looking shocked.
"I never knew he could do that." Philia blinked with confusion. I slowly nodded before revealing myself, making both of them jump when they turn back to me. "... God's Grace! Don't give us a scare like that!" Philia shouted at me. I smiled nervously at her, nodding my head as I placed a hand on my chest. I dropped it when she was giving me a cold glare, making me confused.
"... That's interesting," Castit commented. I turned to him, displaying a puzzled expression as I pointed at him. He looked confused before realization appeared on his face, "Oh ... how did I detect you when you were invisible? Is that what you're confused about?"
I nodded my head as he went to explain or tell me it, "... I ... don't know really. I don't know how to explain it but since it may be confusing to you guys. I will try my best. It's like a sixth sense, whereas I can detect anyone from hiding behind bushes, trees, rivers, you name it. I always had this ability ever since I was born and I always thought all feaolks have it. But seeing that my sister never reacted to the humans who were hiding in the bushes where I could detect them there ... I guess only a few of us have it."
"I ... have heard of feaolks having unique abilities that aid to their flight." Philia slowly nodded, looking curious.
"... I'm not so special with this ability, I'm sure the other feaolks who were born with it have this ability." He said.
I shook my head, disagreeing with him as he seemingly knew what I was feeling for his next line, "I'm sorry if you do think I am but ... I just don't see myself being special. We're all ordinary in our own ways. Why try to be special?" I stared at him confused, blinking repeatedly. He stared at me as he realized what he said. "... Call it a seventh sense where I can feel what you are feeling."
"Seventh sense?" Philia asked.
"I don't know." He shrugged. "I don't know much about it as I don't know much about my race."
"Fair enough." She nodded her head. "Well, for now, enjoy your time with the rabbits- maybe explore the rest of the Vined Forest. As it is huge than you think it is."
"Yeah ... I found a lake while getting lost." He said, looking nervous.
Philia chuckled quietly, turning towards me, "Will you keep him from getting lost?"
I nodded, smiling softly. I can keep him from getting lost, trust in my soul I won't. She nodded slowly, giving me that same cold glare before turning back to him. ... What did I do wrong to make her glare at me like that? "Now, you won't get lost." She said as he rolled his eyes, turning towards me as she went away with the small rabbits. "I guess ... I'm stuck with you? It's not a bad thing- don't take it as such."
I nodded, turned, and walked back over to where I left my journal, picked it up, and turned towards Castit who slowly followed me.
"... Since I am following you, where are we going?"
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- End of Chapter 5
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